October Twilight
Chapter Two
The More Things Change
The second week after joining the Order of the Phoenix passed without incident. Dorcas woke up every morning and Apparated into the atrium of St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries. Once there, she descended into the cool labyrinthine basement used for research and education. Healers in white robes bearing the St. Mungo's emblem of the crossed wand and bone walked through the magically lit hallways, muttering to hands-free dictation quills about new remedies and the progress of patients. Experts in Herbology and Potions moved around freely, carrying odd assortments of cauldrons, vials, and exotic plants.
Dorcas paid dearly for missing the study group in Medicinal Potions, but when Healer Bones came around to inspect her Blood-Replenishing Potion, he gave her an A instead of the P she thought she deserved. He was a genial old man with pure white hair and a long, curling white moustache, but he graded impartially no matter how much he liked or disliked his students. On the sheet of parchment that listed her grade, Healer Bones had scribbled a message that read: For thorough directions, come to my office at six-thirty.
Dorcas knew which directions Healer Bones would be giving her. She'd been waiting anxiously for a week to see Order headquarters. Healer Bones dismissed the class ten minutes later, deliberately avoiding Dorcas's gaze as she passed by his desk.
She should have known that Edgar Bones had joined the Order. He had fought with Dumbledore against the last Dark wizard, Grindelwald. According to the stories, he had retired from his career as an Auror after that, preferring to save lives rather than take them. Dorcas wondered why Dumbledore hadn't asked Healer Bones to set up the hospital ward at headquarters. He was a brilliant man and much more experienced than Dorcas. It wouldn't take him over two hours, whereas Dorcas would likely be sneaking into the Practical Studies classroom for weeks to identify everything she would need.
The rest of the day passed painfully slowly. Healer Graham scolded her in Healing Charms for daydreaming instead of mending the broken femur on the skeleton standing in front of her desk. While she had been wondering about how big headquarters was and the most sanitary location for the hospital ward, the skeleton had walked out the door and frightened a passing Herbologist. In Muggle Remedies, Healer Jackson had flashed so many slides of microscopic viruses that Dorcas's vision was blurry when she took her lunch break.
After the quick meal, she was forced to concentrate on the task at hand. Because she was training for the Creature Induced Injuries ward, she was taking a Care of Magical Creatures class to study their behavior and the various ways they might injure someone. The slithering, hissing Runespoor on the table top drove thoughts of the Order from her mind. She hated the smallest of snakes, but the vivid orange serpent that kept snapping at her fingers made rattlesnakes look cute.
Finally, after a fairly painless Medicinal Transfiguration lesson, Dorcas headed to the lifts with her classmates. In all, there were nine trainee Healers, three of whom had gone to Durmstrang and one from the Salem Witches Institute, who had come to England for a top-notch Healing education. She said good-bye in the Atrium and headed down the hallway beside the welcome witch's desk to meet with Healer Bones.
By the time she reached the office, the straps of her bulging knapsack were digging into her shoulders. At least it wasn't a Thursday, she thought. The Lycanthropy textbook was twice as heavy as her thickest Potions book, and she had to carry around An Advanced Guide to Magical Maladies, a hardcover, fifteen hundred-paged book, during her practical courses.
"Have a seat, Miss Meadowes," Healer Bones smiled. "Shut the door, please."
She did as he asked and eased into the plush chair beside his desk. The white walls were covered in diagrams of the human body and posters bearing catchphrases that reminded patients to only use approved antidotes and advertisements for magical vaccinations.
"I wasn't surprised when Dumbledore told me you'd joined the Order. He asked me to show you to headquarters tonight. He'd like you to start working on the hospital wing this weekend."
"Sir, if I can ask, why aren't you setting up the hospital ward? You'd be much better at it than me."
Healer Bones's moustache twitched, but Dorcas couldn't tell if it was from laughter or irritation. "I thought that would be obvious." The aged Healer sighed quietly. "It's a shame that such young people are forced to fight. When I was your age, there weren't Dark wizards lurking around every corner."
The old man checked his watch, giving Dorcas a moment to recover from the unexpected response and lack of a proper answer.
"Well, it's about time. Grab your books. I made an exception today, but I won't take Order business as an excuse not to study anymore."
"Yes, sir."
She hefted the bag onto her shoulder and followed Healer Bones down the hallway and towards the fire grates in the Atrium.
"We have to make this look as nonchalant as possible," he explained. "Strictly speaking, the Ministry doesn't allow groups like ours. They think we're vigilantes who get in their way. That makes getting new members to headquarters a bit difficult. For today, you'll have to suffer side-along Apparation unless you've got two broomsticks hidden in that backpack. Merlin, do we really give you that much work?"
"Today was a light day," Dorcas laughed, hoisting her bag higher on her shoulder.
Healer Bones whistled and shook his head. As the Atrium was the only area of St. Mungo's without Anti-Apparation wards, it was bustling with arriving and departing patients, visitors, and Healers. Healer Bones and Dorcas stepped into the center of a dense crowd of Herbologists leaving for the day so that no one would notice the side-along Apparation.
Next moment, they were standing in front of an upscale housing addition for rich Muggles. The fresh white sidewalk led through a brick archway with the words "Holly Falls" etched into the stone. A wide lane wound through the new community and past a manmade lake full of squawking ducks and several playgrounds full of children.
The house itself was invisible until Dorcas focused on the empty space between numbers sixteen and eighteen. A large brick house with a crisply painted front door and brass griffin knocker pushed the houses on either side out of the way. Lights twinkled through slits in the heavy white drapes and many black shadows passed in front of the large picture window to the left of the door.
They entered the house quickly, and Healer Bones recast the enchantments on the door to lock it. The house was entirely Muggle except for the broomsticks propped against the wall and the wizard hats hanging on the coat rack. Electric lights from overhead fixtures and glass sconces lit the otherwise dim hallway.
Healer Bones strode purposefully down the hall, bypassing the many rooms and people scattered around the house. One room they passed contained a long, black table, but no chairs. Another room was stacked from floor to ceiling with books. In the kitchen, various appliances and utensils were preparing tea and baking biscuits. The whole house looked like it had never been occupied except by the Order.
Two young wizards with flaming red hair were perched on stools around the island countertop in the center of the kitchen and drinking coffee, probably Irish coffee judging from their raucous conversation. Several feet away an older man stood scowling at them and muttering about hooligans. He was a scary sight, though Dorcas tried not to gawk at him. His face was heavily scarred, and when she and Healer Bones entered the kitchen, he stared at her with dark, beady eyes.
"Who are you?" he demanded.
"I'm Dorcas Meadowes, sir. Pleased to meet you."
She held out her hand, but the man just glared at it, as if it were a symbol of aggression rather than friendliness. He glanced over her shoulder at Healer Bones, who was smiling genially.
"Evening, Edgar," the scarred man growled. "It's been awhile since we've gone fishing."
Healer Bones laughed shortly. "You don't fish, Alastor. The last time I invited you, you thought Dark wizards might have poisoned the lake on the off chance you'd catch and eat a fish."
The man called Alastor grinned, twisting his scarred face into a more frightening sight than it had been before. "You're Edgar," he said, as if Healer Bones had just asked his own name.
"May I introduce Dorcas Meadowes?" the Healer said politely. "Dorcas, this is Alastor Moody, an old friend and colleague."
"Simon Meadowes's daughter?" Moody wondered.
"Yes, sir."
Moody surveyed her, squinting suspiciously as he did so. "Your dad's got a right important job at the Ministry. Could be dangerous for your family, him working in the Department of Mysteries and all."
In any other circumstance, Dorcas would have laughed at his paranoid antics, but standing under his beady gaze, laughing was not an option.
"Actually, sir, my father is a Hit Wizard for the Magical Law Enforcement Squad, as I'm sure you know."
"Aye, I do know it. He's a damn fine Hit Wizard, Simon Meadowes. I wasn't happy to see him leave the Auror department, but he was the best man for the promotion."
Moody turned back to his cup of tea, completely ending the conversation that Dorcas had thought was just beginning. Healer Bones had drifted over to the two redheaded wizards sometime during the introductions, leaving Dorcas alone without any idea of what she was supposed to be doing.
"That was actually really polite for Moody."
Dorcas turned towards the voice. Sirius Black was leaning against the wall, looking like he had been there for a long time.
"You know him?" she asked.
"Yeah, he teaches a few of my classes. Concealment and Disguise and Tracking. He's a bit off, but he knows his stuff."
Dorcas had forgotten that Black was in Auror training. She only noticed the interlocking silver M's, the emblem of the Ministry of Magic, on his black robes after he mentioned his classes.
"Lily's upstairs," Black continued. "She said there are a few rooms you might consider for the hospital ward."
Dorcas followed Black back down the hallway and up the stairs. The second floor looked even more deserted than the ground floor. There were no light fixtures or mirrors, and the only furniture was an empty bookshelf and desk located in a small room. Someone, probably Lily, had charmed candles to float near the ceiling like in hallways at St. Mungo's.
"Dorcas, I thought you'd never get here," Lily exclaimed.
Dorcas let her knapsack fall off her shoulder. The bag collided with the wooden floor, and the resounding thud echoed off the high, bare walls of the room.
"Trust me, neither did I. Today was a very long day."
She turned in a circle, surveying the room. It was large enough for five or six hospital beds with three windows facing east. A door opposite the biggest window led to the room with the desk and bookshelf, almost like it was meant to be used as an office. Doubtful as she was that she should be the one to set up the hospital ward, Dorcas felt a thrill of excitement when she thought about how to best arrange the room and where to store the potions and supplies.
"Medicinal Potions, Medicinal Charms, Muggle Remedies, Basic Transfiguration for Healers, Advanced Care of Magical Creatures," Remus read, shifting through her books. "Exactly how many classes are you taking?"
"That's not all of them," Dorcas grinned. "There's Herbology, Practicals, and my personal favorite, Lycanthropy."
Remus grinned while he shoved the textbooks back into her bag. "You should be an expert in Lycanthropy."
The Healer-in-Training laughed lightly. "Haven't had to study all semester, thank you very much."
Black made a sound in the back of his throat, clearly surprised that anyone besides himself, Potter, and Pettigrew would speak so lightly of Remus's condition.
"Well, if all I was supposed to do is find a room, I should be getting home. I've a practical exam in the Creature Induced Injuries ward tomorrow."
"Is that all you do? Study?" Black asked, indignation making him sound more arrogant than ever.
Dorcas turned towards him slowly, her eyes narrowed. Knowing that this couldn't end well, Lily and Remus stepped between their friends.
"We should go too. I told James we'd meet him and Pete after their shift is over," Lily said, ushering Dorcas out the door and down the hall.
"Pettigrew's in the Order?" Dorcas asked, amazed that Dumbledore would let such a poor wizard join.
"Don't sound so surprised," Black growled, trying to shrug off Remus, who had a vice grip on his arm.
"I only meant that I haven't seen him since we graduated," Dorcas replied acidly.
Lily practically dragged Dorcas out of the housing addition. Wards had been placed on the entire community, so they had to walk out of the gates to Disapparate.
"Can you come for dinner sometime this week, Dorcas? Mum said she'd love to have you," Lily said, breaking the tension.
"I could make some time for your mum's cooking."
The group said their good-byes and Dorcas Apparated to the manor. Characteristically, her father had charmed the door to open only from the inside. After answering a question about her nickname for Darius, the door swung open. Dorcas made for the stairs, but her father's clipped voice held her back.
"Where were you?"
"Out with some friends," she replied easily. It wasn't completely a lie. She had been with Lily and Remus.
Her father crossed his arms, staring at her coolly. He wanted to believe her, she could see it in his eyes, but in times like these, strange disappearances were suspicious. She wondered if she should tell him about the Order of the Phoenix, but decided that she should not. He had been a bit off ever since her mother and Calliope died. He'd always been overprotective of his daughters, but he'd gone to the extreme afterwards. He would tell Dorcas that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named wouldn't find out about her ability, and therefore, she wasn't in immediate danger. Whether she was targeted or not, the damage she could do if she joined He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named—of her own volition or under the Imperius Curse—was too great and terrible to allow.
"I'd like to know in advance, Dorcas. Your classes ended three hours ago."
She stifled a sigh. "I know you're worried, Dad, but I'm an adult. If this is really going to be such a problem, maybe I should move back to London."
She regretted her words immediately. They were too harsh, but the frustration had been building since September. She'd had two months of freedom while living in her flat in London, but then Darius had gone back to Hogwarts. Afraid that her father's loneliness would drive him to unhealthy habits, Dorcas had moved back in with him, taking the entire upstairs as her own apartment.
Her father walked into the kitchen without saying another word. Torn between following him and studying for her exam, Dorcas let out a frustrated growl and stomped upstairs. With all of her homework, busy class schedule, and Order duties, she wasn't going to be home very often. Her father would just have to understand. She had to fight He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.
o o o
Before Dorcas knew it, the school week had ended and the weekend had flown by. Her test in Practical Studies had been a piece of cake compared to her other classes. True to his word, Healer Bones had not given her a break. He had given her Rejuvenation Juice a P and made it very clear that any student receiving three P's would be in danger of failing the final exam. She now had extra homework for both the Blood-Replenishing Potion and for the Rejuvenation Juice. She had never received any grade less than an A, and feeling like an idiot was grating on her nerves.
Thursday night came quicker than she had imagined it would. At four forty-five, she said good-night to her father. She felt his accusing stare as she walked out the front door. He suspected something. She just hoped he thought she was doing something frivolous like meeting up with a boyfriend. If it weren't for the anti-Apparation wards, she would have avoided him altogether, but she had to leave through the front door.
She knew he was only worried about her, but she would be nineteen-years-old soon. She had been an adult for a full two years and didn't feel like she had to explain her every move to him. It was only dinner at Lily's house, but it was the principle of the matter.
She turned sharply and appeared the next moment in suburban community just north of Somerset. After ten minutes of walking, Dorcas began passing the familiar houses lining Apperson High Street.
The Evans's house was still decorated for Halloween. Three soggy carved pumpkins were perched on the steps and orange tassels hung inside the window frame. She half-expected Lily to have charmed the doorbell to play scary music.
Lily's dad opened the door a moment later and invited Dorcas in, inquiring about her health and her studies as he took her cloak. He looked older than Dorcas remembered. She had heard her parents whispering about her Aunt Margot and about how Muggles didn't live as long as wizards. The idea put knots into Dorcas's stomach.
"Make yourself at home," Dr. Evans said genially, entering the drawing room. "James and I were just setting up a game of wizard's chess. Those chessmen are something, aren't they? Moving and taking orders … or refusing to take orders."
Dorcas tried her best not to roll her eyes, but it was a natural reaction where James Potter was concerned. She followed Dr. Evans into the room, steeling herself for a much less enjoyable night than she had planned on.
"Dorcas, you know James and Sirius, right?" Dr. Evans asked, oblivious to the young woman's scowl.
She should have known Potter wouldn't go anywhere without his sidekick. Resigning herself to the situation, she plopped onto the couch as far away from Black as possible while Potter and Dr. Evans sat on opposite sides of the coffee table, wrestling the chessmen onto the board.
"You've got to be forceful, Dr. Evans," Black suggested. "They'll know you're a Muggle if you don't take charge."
Instantly, all the chessmen began sputtering about being used by a Muggle.
"Good one, dumbass," Dorcas muttered.
The smile melted off of Black's lips. "What's your problem, Meadowes?" he demanded.
The bickering sure to follow was cut off by Lily announcing dinner. Dorcas fairly glared at her best friend as they walked into the dining room and took their seats. Much to her chagrin, Dorcas was stuck sitting next to Black. The one and only time she had voluntarily sat next to him, he had tried to feel her up. She gripped her fork tightly, prepared to stab him if his hands strayed anywhere near her.
"Petunia's not coming?" Mrs. Evans asked, looking around the table, as if she'd just noticed her oldest daughter missing.
"She had other plans," Dr. Evans answered.
"You mean she didn't want to see me," Lily replied coldly.
"Us," Potter corrected.
Dorcas clamped her mouth shut, not about to give Black and Potter reason to annoy her more. She'd never had a problem with Petunia. Of course, Lily's older sister distained anyone magical, but Dorcas thought that was probably because she was jealous. Her Uncle Orion was like that sometimes, when someone did particularly impressive magic in front of him.
Dr. Evans wanted to know all about Healer training. He was a Muggle Healer and was fascinated by magical medicine. Dorcas thought she saw Black rolling his eyes once when she was discussing her study schedule, so she not-so-subtly kicked him in the calf. He shot her even more dirty glares after that.
Potter was amazingly good-natured during the meal. He barely talked about himself at all or messed up his hair anymore than it already was. She didn't care what Lily said, in seventh-year he had tortured just as many students as he had during all of their other years. Unfortunately, he had been Head Boy and Dorcas couldn't take points away from him for it. But she had taken plenty of points from Black. In fact, just enough so that Hufflepuff won the House Cup.
"What are you doing for the Order?" Mrs. Evans asked Black and Dorcas. "If you can tell us. I understand if you can't, but … well, we're worried about all of you, being so young and fighting Dark wizards."
"It's all right, Mrs. Evans," Black answered. "I'm standing guard mostly."
Dorcas was amazed that Lily had told her parents about the Order. Her own father wouldn't have understood the necessity of it and he was a Hit Wizard.
"I'm setting up a hospital ward at Headquarters."
Dr. Evans almost choked on his meatloaf. "What! Don't you have a magical hospital?"
"We do," Potter cut in. "Dumbledore's just afraid that, one day, it won't be safe to go there."
Mrs. Evans made a high-pitched sound in the back of her throat and covered her mouth with one hand. She looked near tears.
"And you're setting this up?" she wondered, looking at Dorcas. "But you've so little experience."
"I know," Dorcas admitted, uncomfortable self-doubt settling into her stomach again.
"There's just no one else," Potter said. He glanced down the table at Dorcas. "No offense, you're clever and all, I didn't mean you're not."
Dorcas gaped at him while he continued talking. She lifted a finger to her ear and rubbed. Surely she had heard wrong, but she thought Potter had just complimented someone other than himself for doing something other than hexing Severus Snape.
"Edgar Bones offered to do it, but Dumbledore needs all the Aurors we've got. Benjy Fenwick has gone missing, and he was our spy inside the Death Eaters."
Dorcas was getting the impression that Potter had been in the Order a lot longer than she had. Perhaps the group meeting with Dumbledore hadn't been an orientation speech at all. She wondered how long Lily and Remus had been working for Dumbledore and why he had waited until October to ask her to join.
"How about some dessert?" Lily asked, breaking the tension.
Dorcas was grateful for the change of topic. She didn't want to dwell on all the death and destruction that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was causing. She was in the Muggle world when she was at the Evans's, and while that was no guarantee of safety, it was a comfort.
"I'll help," Dorcas said, following Lily into the kitchen.
She made sure the door between the rooms was shut before approaching the counter space where Lily was cutting pumpkin pie.
"You think you're being funny? Shuffling the seats so I have to sit next to the Sirius the Sidekick?"
Lily laid down the knife and clamped a hand over her mouth. She turned to check the door before letting herself laugh out loud. Dorcas's seriousness melted away, and she chuckled with her best friend. She missed the days when they would walk through the corridors of Hogwarts Castle making fun of Potter and Black.
"I didn't do it on purpose!" Lily laughed, wiping the tears away from her brilliantly green eyes. "And I didn't know they were coming. They just showed up, and since they're my boyfriend and his best friend …." She looked pointedly at Dorcas before turning back to the pie.
"I know, I know. It's just … Lily, you know how much I dislike the way they act."
Lily grinned widely. "Oh, my sweet Dorcas. Always disliking and disapproving of behavior, never loathing or condemning the person." The redhead laughed at her friend's frown. "It's a Hufflepuff thing I guess."
Dorcas pulled a stack of small plates from the cabinet and handed them to Lily. "I just don't know what you see in Potter."
"James," Lily corrected lightly. "You should give him and Sirius another chance. They're different than we thought."
"So you say."
"What proof do you have that they're the same immature boys who put Exploding Chalk in Professor McGonagall's desk?"
An involuntary smile crept onto Dorcas's lips. Whether she liked to admit it or not, some of the Marauder's pranks were ingenious. On the other hand, she had plenty of proof that Potter and Black hadn't changed. She had seen them torturing Snape so many times during seventh-year, but just like then, Dorcas couldn't find it in her heart to tell Lily the truth. She would be crushed that Potter hadn't really changed. As long as he treated Lily like a princess, Dorcas could survive being around him and his stupid sidekick.
"None," she mumbled.
After dessert and a lively game of wizard's chess between Potter and Dr. Evans, Dorcas said good-night. She had had so much fun watching Dr. Evans argue with the chessmen that she'd lost track of the time. Surprisingly, Black said he should be getting home as well. Dorcas didn't think he would be one to care much about attending early classes. She had him pegged as the student who slept in the back of the class, like he had mostly done at Hogwarts.
"Why don't you just Apparate from inside the house," Mrs. Evans said, glancing out the front window. "It's so late, and you never know who could be watching."
"You don't have Anti-Apparation wards on the house?" Potter asked, looking alarmed.
Lily looked at her parents apologetically. "Of course we do. I cast them the moment I turned seventeen."
Dr. and Mrs. Evans looked stunned that Lily had taken such precautions without telling them. Dorcas understood her concern, though. As a Muggle-born, Lily was in danger, but at least she knew it. Her parents probably hadn't thought a Dark wizard would bother the Muggle world much.
"Owl me with your schedule," Lily said, hugging Dorcas good-bye. "We need to get together more often."
"I'll send Isis tomorrow morning."
It was a long, painful walk to the outskirts of town where Dorcas and Black could Disapparate without being seen. Dorcas couldn't think of anything she had in common with Black. During the one day they'd spent together in fourth-year, she hadn't learned anything about him except that she didn't like him.
"I thought you wanted to be an Auror," Black said finally, breaking the heavy silence.
"I did, but I changed my mind during second term of last year."
"Why?"
Dorcas bristled at the simple question. That wasn't really any of his business, but it wasn't like he couldn't guess. They had been in all the same classes for sixth- and seventh-year. Had he really not heard Professor Sprout tell her that her mother and sister had been murdered? Had he not noticed that she'd missed two weeks of school? Even if he hadn't, Darius had been on the Gryffindor Quidditch team with Black. He'd missed a game, and Black would have never failed to notice a missing Seeker. Or did he just not realize that Darius was her brother? For whatever reason he was asking, he was still an idiot.
"Mind your own business." It came out harsher than she intended. The stiff words didn't suit her soft voice.
"It's just a question, Meadowes. Merlin. You'd think I asked you your deepest, darkest secret."
"Maybe you did."
The words came out before Dorcas could stop them. It wasn't really her darkest secret, but it was close in line. Black was staring at her with his head cocked to one side. His eyes were tracing the soft features of her face, but for the first time, Dorcas didn't think he was imagining how best to seduce her. It made her strangely uncomfortable seeing this deeper side of Black.
"So, why did you decide to become an Auror?" she asked, adverting her gaze from Black's.
"That's my darkest secret."
Her head snapped in his direction, eyes narrowed and a frown pulling at the corners of her lips. "Are you mocking me?" she demanded.
Black looked down at the blacktop and shook his head slowly. "No."
Dorcas turned her attention back to the black windows of the houses lining the street. She had no doubt that he was telling the truth.
There was something deeper to Black's arrogance, and even if he wouldn't tell her what it was, at least she knew it was there. Somehow, it made him seem more human to know that hexing Snape and snogging girls wasn't his whole life. If there was one thing she could understand, it was burying darker emotions. She had been doing it for nearly six years with Occlumency. It was difficult and painful, but necessary, to compartmentalize her feelings and stuff them away. To know that Black had been doing the same thing endeared him to her, even while she was disgusted with the way he had done it.
They said a quick good-bye as they reached a less populated area and Disapparated to their separate locations. Dorcas hurriedly cast the charm to reveal the new wards on the front door and deactivated them before stepping inside and recasting the charms.
When she entered her study, she sat down at her desk and pulled a pile of parchment towards her. Diagrams of the hospital ward, shopping lists, and notes on which reference books to put in the office filled every page in the stack. She added a few more notes that her conversation with Dr. Evans had reminded her of. She was no expert in Muggle remedies, but she thought band-aids sounded interesting enough to think about keeping some on hand.
When she looked up from her description of band-aids, she eyed the pile of textbooks next to the desk. Wearily, she hefted Understanding Lycanthropy off the floor and flipped to chapter thirteen. In less than four hours, she would be sitting in Lycanthropy and then going to the greenhouses for Herbology. It was going to be a difficult day, but when she thought about completing the hospital ward, she knew it was worth it. Any discomfort working for the Order caused was better than the unease Dorcas felt when she wasn't doing anything to fight He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.