For the sake of keeping things easy and understandable, the animals have translators. That is all.
Chapter 2: Musketeers Sing!
Terry began playing his lute in a merry tune just as several musketeers on horseback were coming up behind him. Phineas, Monty, Irving, and Albert were among the many musketeers there. The song was sung by Terry and all the other musketeers. It went like this:
"All for one, hey!" they all sang.
"All for one and one for all!" sang Monty.
"Musketeers sing all for one and one for all!" Terry's voice was more obvious on the creed part, but other than that, it was all of them. They all continued: "If you dare to cross our path, prepare to fall, 'cause we'll fight you. All for one and one for all and all for one and one for all and all for one and all!
"So, if you think you'd care to kick some derriere you know that as a musketeer you'd be so fearsome. If you believe you're manly, come and join our family. Soon, we'll make sure you're a musketeer."
Watching the musketeers training on their swords were Perry, Pinky, and Doofy. They were looking at them amazed. These guys were their idols.
"Man, look at 'em, guys. That's gonna be us out there someday... I just know it," said Perry, his eyes shining in optimism.
"I can't wait," said Doofy.
"Yeah, me too, man," said Pinky in a Latino accent.
"All for one all men of honor hear the call. Musketeers sing: All for one and one for all! All for one, hey! All for one and one for all. All for one, hey! All for one and one for all and all for one and one for all and all for one and all!" The musketeers sang.
"All for one and one for all!" proclaimed Terry. With that, the song finished.
The scene changes to Perry. He's putting shoe shine on musketeer shoes. Doofy is mopping the floor and Pinky is getting tools from a toolbox. "Yep, janitors today, musketeers tomorrow," said Perry optimistically.
Just then, he noticed something out of the corner of his eye. Only a few inches off the ground, his hat was floating toward him. It came onto the bench he was working on and it turned out to be Steve the chameleon bringing him his hat. The little reptile let out a cute throaty noise and set the hat in front of Perry. "Hey, my lucky musketeer hat! Thanks, Steve," said Perry, stroking a finger on the chameleon's head. The little guy let out a contented noise at the treatment. "Remember when the musketeers gave me this hat, Steve? They even autographed it. See?" He picked up the brim of the hat to reveal the signatures of Phineas, Monty, Irving, and Albert in fancy script. "I can't wait to be a great big hero..." His daydream was cut short with a hit to the back of his head from Doofy's mop. "Ow! Careful, Doofy!" In his recoil, he accidentally knocked the pot of shoe shine into Doofy's mop water. He didn't seem to notice it... and neither did Doofy.
"Sorry, Perry..." said Doofy to Perry. He put his mop into the mop water to get some "fresh water" as he continued. "I can't wait to be a musketeer either. I have plenty of good ideas. Musketeers could use a clever guy like me..." He might have continued, but he just so happened to look down just then to notice the floor stained and dirty. He tried to mop it out, but only succeeded in making it worse.
"Hey, Pinky! What about you?" asked Perry.
Pinky had selected a pipe wrench from his toolbox and was working on a pipe just then. "Are joo kidding, man? Musketeers need men like me that are brave," Pinky said, wiggling his eyebrows meaningfully.
"Yeah, and they need guys that are brave too," said Perry, polishing a boot with a rag.
"That's what I said, brave," said Pinky. Just then, the pipes rattled, causing Pinky to jump into hiding. After a moment, he came out of his hiding place in his toolbox, looked at the pipe and, seeing it to be stable, laughed a little at himself.
Meanwhile, a few floors up, the Enigma was getting undressed for a shower. He hummed to himself contentedly before he shifted his wooden leg into the bath painfully. Then, he grabbed his soap and scrub brush from the floor. "Yes, it is most assured, I've been looking forward to this all month," he said, a small smile on his face.
Back with Perry, Pinky, and Doofy, the three were still up to their chores. Doofy had gone to get something to fix his mess: sandpaper. "Maybe I can sand it out," he said, coming in with a whole stack of sandpaper. He began sanding away at the mess on the floor, but little did he know, one of the pieces of sandpaper wound up on Perry's workbench.
When Perry reached back for his rag, he came up with the sandpaper instead. He was off somewhere else in his mind as the sandpaper sanded off the boot. When the dust cleared, he found nothing left of the boot but the bottom. He gasped at the result. He looked in his hand where the sandpaper still was and went "Huh?!" wondering how sandpaper wound up on his bench.
To fix his mistake, Perry took a complete boot from the bench, ripped it apart, and tried slamming the top half of the boot onto the bottom. It had a little difficulty sticking at first, but then, it looked like it worked. It stayed put! For maybe one second before peeling apart. Perry's smile went down with the peeling bottom. He looked around nervously, searching for another solution to his problem. It was then that he noticed there was a jar of glue on the top shelf of the nearby cupboard. He climbed up the pipes and onto a valve. Independent by nature, he wanted to do it himself. He reached for the glue, just inches from his fingers. "Almost..." he reached for it more, but he caused the valve under him to turn. In trying to regain his balance, the valve turned madly under his feet, causing pressure to build. This caused problems on Pinky's end.
Pinky was working on the pipes with a pipe wrench, trying to make a good seal. The pressure in the pipes built up by Perry came to him and caused the pipe to expand, then rip off the wall, whipping the poor dog around. It had become a hose of water, shooting water everywhere. Poor Pinky held on for dear life.
On the Enigma's end, he was enjoying his shower still. As he was scrubbing himself up, he sang a song to himself, "A I am Avarice, B I am Badness..." He bared his teeth into the water, biting at it. Suddenly, the water flow stopped. "What?" He looked at the shower head, mystified as to why it stopped.
Back downstairs, Doofy had gone from sandpaper to a floor buffer, still trying to get the show polish off the floor. The poor man was too thin to be able to hold onto it well enough though. He would soon lose control.
Pinky wasn't having much luck with the pipe either. It had stopped whipping him around and was instead wrapped about him like a snake. Water was still coming out and he was batting at the spout with his pipe wrench, trying to get it to stop. The pipe was somehow able to wrap around the pipe wrench and was coming after Pinky. He ran away in fear. As he ran away, the pipe came off the wall further, snapping out of its brackets.
Perry was still trying to reach the glue on the shelf. "Almost... got it," he said hopefully. The jar was close to gracing his fingers. Doofy came over on the buffer and collided with the wall. This caused the cupboard to shake and the glue fell off the shelf. Perry caught it before it hit the ground. "I got it!" It was too soon though. Doofy collided with him and in the process, the jar got onto his head. Perry held onto the buffer for dear life screaming, "Whoa! Doofy, look out!" Pinky was running their way, still running from the pipe. They all collided. Now they weren't just on a ride with the buffer, but the pipe streaming water was also a propeller. The pipe's brackets came off further, now affecting the floors above them. This led to the Enigma's shower. As he was tapping the shower head, still wondering why water wasn't coming out, the tub fell out of the floor. The pipe being dragged by the janitors downstairs was attached to his tub. So, he fell through a few floors until he reached the bottom in a cloud of dust.
The three janitors had since gotten tangled in the pipe. They watched as the shower head came rolling their way from the tub. They looked to the tub as the curtain opened to a dazed Enigma. Perry was the first to take initiative. "Oh, Captain Enigma!" He said with a salute. His two friends followed suit. The Enigma may or may not have saluted back, but, being dazed as he was, he just fell out of the tub in a damp heap.
Once the Enigma came to his senses and got dressed, he threw the three janitors into the laundry room. The three were thrown against a wall before they fell in a heap on the floor. "Now, listen, you yardsticks! I am sick and tired of your screw-ups! You guys are hopeless! I leave you for five minutes and I come back to a disaster!" He had hobbled into the room with his wooden leg and crutch. It didn't help that his left eye was gone as well as his left leg. He still stood as an intimidating person over the three though.
Perry came to the meek defense. "Well, we were practicing our teamwork so that we can be good musketeers," he said as he got out of the heap.
"Musketeers?" The Enigma started chuckling, then full-out laughing. It sounded to him like the greatest joke ever written. He actually collapsed onto his side and started banging a barrel and smashing his crutch on the ground at the hilarity of it all. The three friends were now all standing and watching the captain, mystified. After a few aftershock laughs, the Enigma got up onto his feet again, put his crutch back under his arm, and took out a handkerchief. He began wiping his forehead with it. He breathed out, calming himself. "That's priceless," he said.
"But we could work really hard and prove ourselves, Captain Enigma! And then would you let us be musketeers?" Perry asked, giving his most adorable smile.
"Well, there's three things wrong with that," said the Enigma. "One!" He pointed at Pinky, who yiped and shrunk into his hat to hide. Little lights where the dog's eyes were showed from under the hat. "You're a coward!" the Enigma finished for Pinky.
"Two..." the Enigma continued. He made two fingers and made his way to Doofy. The poor man was making a poor case for himself. There was a dial tone heard and the Enigma realized it came from Doofy. He leaned into the man's ear and heard: " 'We're sorry, the number you have reached has been disconnected.' " The Enigma recoiled in disgust. "Ugh, you're a doofus." The man was still as spaced out as ever.
"And, you, well, you're just too small," the Enigma said to Perry, shrinking his index finger and thumb in emphasis. Perry shrank back out of fear and intimidation. The Enigma went on, "Why, I wouldn't have you blighters as musketeers even if you were the last recruits in all of my beloved France!" He flicked Perry's bill, which kept vibrating until Perry grabbed at it with his hands to stop it. "So, you won't need this, will ya?" the Enigma asked, grabbing the fedora from Perry's head. He scrunched it up until it was a small sphere. Perry had been watching this in horror all the while. The Enigma took Perry's hand, put the ball in it, and said, "Here, kid, have a ball!" He laughed loudly as he exited, still admiring his joke as he walked out.
Perry looked at the scrunched up hat sadly. He put it on his head, a pouty expression on his face. The poor platypus looked about ready to cry. His friends were sad for him. Then, the door slammed shut, shocking the room and causing the piles of musketeer uniforms to fall on top of the trio. They came out of the pile, one by one. Doofy came out with one of the uniforms covering his head. Pinky just looked sad. Perry looked sad as well, but shortly after coming out of the pile, his hat popped back to its original shape, feather and all.
Meanie Enigma. You don't make Perry cry! That's not cool at all :( Anyway, in writing this, I realized it's much harder to write out what's going on. I mean, a complex scene that only takes a minute requires many paragraphs to describe everything as it should be. I hope I did well enough in that respect. I like the song at the beginning. (I do not own it BTW. It's called "All For One.") Definitely listen to the song while reading, it adds to the experience ;) Also, with Pinky's character (Donald in the Musketeers movie) he has to be somewhat incomprehensible, so I just gave him a Latino accent. It works, especially since nearly every time I think of Pinky, I think of Tito off of Oliver & Company. I hope you guys like it so far! The princess is coming up in the next chapter ;) So, please keep reading and reviewing, thanks :)