Title: Songs of You
Rating: T
Summary: These were her songs, the ones shelved away just for her. Maitlyn.
Author: iheartdotdotdot
Disclaimer: I do not own Camp Rock or anything affiliated. I am not claiming any credit at all.
Chapter Two
I don't act the way I should
I know I should be different
I don't say what I mean
I don't tell you everything
I'm sorry
for not letting you in
I'm sorry
for letting you down
-"I'm Sorry" byMitchie Torres
----
"She hates me." Mitchie mumbled as Shane grabbed an ore and rowed their canoe further out into the lake. For some reason Mitchie had agreed to go on a canoe ride with Shane when he asked her after dinner. Mitchie had said yes without thinking. Now that she was sitting alone with Shane in the middle of the lake she was starting to regret it. She could feel his eyes dark along her face and body and it made her want to jump out, even though she didn't know how to swim.
"No she doesn't." Shane replied staring at Mitchie and she could feel the stare as she stared down at her feet. She could tell exactly how Shane was staring and looking without even having to see him, she was used to that look from him. He had been giving it to him since the first day she ever met him.
"Yes she does. She stormed out on me yesterday. She never does that." Mitchie said picking at imaginary lint on her light blue jeans, anything was better then watching Shane stare at her. Especially after that song he played for the songwriting class. It just made things even weirder for Mitchie, but she still didn't want to loose the friendship with Shane. No matter weird the said friendship really was. It was still a friendship and on top of it Shane was the only person that Mitchie could talk to about Caitlyn.
"Maybe because you're not being honest with her. She just wants the truth Mitchie." Shane stopped paddling with the ore and set it back on the canoe. "Caitlyn wants you to tell her, she does."
"How can you say that? I mean, how would you like for one of your friends-guy friends-to suddenly proclaim their love for you after you knew them for a couple of years? I don't think you would like it very much." Mitchie said folding her arms and glancing up at Shane, who's dark eyes were still burning into her.
"No, but Caitlyn wants you to tell her. Even if she doesn't feel the same way, she just wants the truth. She wants to know why we broke up and what your songs are about and how you really feel." Shane told Mitchie and her heart skipped a beat as he mentioned her songs, how had he known she had been writing songs about Caitlyn?
"How did you know that?" Mitchie asked Shane and he smiled at her. "About the songs?"
"You always wrote songs about me and us when we were dating. I just assumed you were still doing something like that. I know you better then you think Mitchie." Shane said quoting a line from verse two of his song. I know you better then you know yourself, I can tell what you're thinking and feeling.
"I can't believe you are using that song for the class." Mitchie said trying to take the conversation off of Caitlyn. Mitchie was really growing old of Shane's advice on the whole thing, even though he still really loves Mitchie. It was complicated and hard.
"Sorry, it's just the song that came out when Uncle Brown told me about the class and the song I had to teach." Shane said and Mitchie shrugged her shoulders, it was a stupid excuse. He could have chosen any song to teach the class. No one told him to take the most personal song he's ever written and put it out there for the entire camp. He could have picked any song to use for the class, any song. He was doing it on purpose.
"Okay fine. Look, I have to get back."
"To talk to Caitlyn?" Shane asked his voice upbeat and hopeful.
"No...to go to one of my classes." Mitchie glanced back towards the shore where Camp Rock was. "I should go."
"You don't have a class do you?" Shane asked and Mitchie knew he could see right trough her, he had always been able to do that. Shane had a way of knowing everything about her sometimes before she even did. The stupid song was right, he did know her.
"No." Mitchie crossed her arms over her chest and stared away from Shane but she could hear him breathing and it was unnerving her.
"Okay." Shane picked up the ore and set it back into the clear water and paddled back to the dock.
----
"Another canoe ride? Are you getting back together or what?" Caitlyn asked Mitchie as she raced back towards the dorms.
Mitchie smiled when she reached Caitlyn and shook her head. "No, we were just talking. Like friends." Mitchie said walking next to Caitlyn who smelled like the soap she always uses. It was a scent that Mitchie had never smelled before Caitlyn and now she always linked it directly to Caitlyn. It was her own signature scent, even if she didn't mean it to be. To Mitchie it always would be.
"So I guess we're not friends, because we don't seem to talk. At least not like that." Caitlyn stopped walking and turned to face Mitchie, her eyes clouded over. Obviously she was still upset.
"Caitlyn, I'm sorry okay?" Mitchie took a deep breathed as her head raced frantically as she tried to think of something-anything to say that would make Caitlyn stay and give her another chance.
"Let's...talk...tonight, okay?" Mitchie said slowly unable to believe she was saying it.
Caitlyn shrugged her shoulders and glanced at the ground. "Okay, whatever. At the docks?" Caitlyn asked and Mitchie nodded her head.
"Yeah, at the docks."
Mitchie watched as Caitlyn sauntered away her hips swinging from side to side slowly and her burnt, blonde hair hitting against her shoulders. She just hoped by the next morning Caitlyn would still be willing to be around her.
----
The docks. Mitchie couldn't believe she was actually going to tell Caitlyn at the docks in exactly three hours. Mitchie was so nervous about meeting Caitlyn she couldn't even eat, so she had left the dining hall earlier, earning herself worried glances from both Peggy and Ella. In her dorm, alone, Mitchie sat at her keyboard and did the only thing she knew how to do when everything else was too much, she wrote a song.
She jotted down the notes and chords she was playing softly on her keyboard in her yellow book and decided to work with lyrics later. She didn't know what to say, all she knew was that she wanted to say something. Pushing her fingers against the black and white keys Mitchie felt the fears and nerves float away as the music rattled against her bones.
The sound was enough to make anything feel okay. Music was everything ot Mitchie, she had no clue what she would do without it. Closing her eyes Mitchie started playing the notes she had written and without knowing what she was doing she started singing. "I don't want to throw away what we have, I just want to be with you, you're the best thing I have. Don't turn away, because I love you." Mitchie stopped playing and opened her eyes and smiled at the space in front of her.
It was perfect.
----
After Mitchie finished her song she got dressed in a new outfit, one she hoped that Caitlyn would like and she slipped out of her dorm. Wrapping her arms around herself she made her way towards the docks as the sun started to sink beneath the mountains.
Mitchie's stomach tied itself into knots as she got closer and closer to the docks and her mind raced. She had no idea what she was going to say. She didn't know what she was going to do. The thought of just rambling scared Mitchie more then anything but she couldn't think of anything to say that would make it easier.
"Mitchie!" Mitchie glanced up and saw Caitlyn standing by the docks waving her hand at Mitchie. Mitchie took a deep breath and walked towards her.
"Hey Caitlyn." Mitchie said as she reached the other girl who was dressed differently from dinner too. she was wearing a camisole and zip up hoodie and skinny jeans with tennis shoes. She looked like the same old Caitlyn, but different.
"So...what's up?" Caitlyn asked pressing her hands deep into her pockets and glancing at Mitchie expectantly.
"Um, I guess we could talk. Do you want to sit?" Mitchie asked and Caitlyn nodded her head.
"Yeah, let's sit by the water." The pair walked towards the water and fell down on the docks. Mitchie glanced at her legs hanging over the wood.
"So I guess I'll just start and tell you why me and Shane broke up."
"Okay." Caitlyn splashed her feet in the water and Mitchie smiled at the sight. It was just one of the many reasons Mitchie really loved Caitlyn. She was so laid back and fearless. Unlike anything Mitchie had ever seen before. Caitlyn was the whole reason that Mitchie ever tried to make herself different. Caitlyn was the reason for everything anymore.
"I just realized...I didn't like him." Mitchie gulped down the growing lump in her throat and glanced at Caitlyn who shrugged her shoulders.
"So? That's hardly bad Mitchie. You don't like him, he loves you. Really, it's a story that's been done a thousand and one times Mitchie." Caitlyn brought her feet up quickly and then splashed them in the clear water again never taking her eyes off them as she spoke.
"No Caitlyn..." Mitchie tucked a strand of her dark hair behind her ear and glanced at Caitlyn. "It's not that I don't like Shane Grey as a person....more as a guy."
"What?" Caitlyn glanced up at Mitchie her eye brows knitted together in confusion. "What do you mean?"
"I mean...I don't like guys Caitlyn. Or at least I don't think I do..." Mitchie glanced away from Caitlyn towards the water and Mitchie heard Caitlyn take a deep breath in.
"Oh." She mumbled as she exhaled.
Mitchie turned towards Caitlyn and Caitlyn quickly met her gaze. "You don't hate me do you?" Mitchie asked as her stomach did flip-flops and her palms grew sweaty. All she wanted to hear was that it was okay, that everything was fine. That Caitlyn liked her not matter what.
"Of course not Mitchie." Caitlyn nodded her head knocking her blonde hair over her shoulders. "I do like you."
It was enough for Mitchie. Before she could control any of her movements she quickly moved towards Caitlyn and brushed her lips against Caitlyn's. Mitchie closed her eyes and she felt Caitlyn clam up and then relax just as quickly. Mitchie took in the taste of Caitlyn's lips and she loved it. They were soft and had the slight taste of mango, it was a perfect kiss. The most perfect one that Mitchie had ever had. "Mitchie?" Mitchie opened her eyes and saw Caitlyn staring at her, her eyes wide with surprise and Mitchie was terrified she had done the wrong thing, but at the same time Caitlyn's mouth was turned up into a half-smile. "I'm sorry...I'm just not ready for this. I like you, I do. I'm just not ready."
Mitchie pulled away from Caitlyn and nodded her head even though she didn't understand anything Caitlyn was saying. None of it made sense. "Okay. Sure." Mitchie quickly stood up, her legs trembling under her weight. "See you tomorrow." Mitchie spun on her heel quickly and ran away from the docks and Caitlyn not sure what she was going to do for the rest of the summer; Camp Rock was turning real bad, real fast.
----
You say you don't mean it
You act like it doesn't matter
But the truth is I love you,
I don't want to loose you
You mean too much
And I won't forget
I won't let go
I won't let go of you
-"Won't Let Go" byMitchie Torres