2.
Hayama Hayato is beyond my expectation in many ways, such as that his smile is not as sunning as it's looked and his character is not as perfect as it's imaged. He always thinks that he can satisfy everyone, yet in the end it hurts himself bloodily.
There is no way he's qualified to sympathize with me.
Casually leaning on against the bleachers, I narrow my eyes staring at the sparkling water below.
That wounded expression, makes him looked more miserable than me.
Who would have thought it? The perfect heartthrob would think he's no better than a perverse man.
Even his one-side hostility is unexpected. Certainly I didn't put myself in a horizontal line with him from the beginning. Hayama's behaviour is as perfect as he would like to show the crowd. Once upon a time I did think so, or I persuaded myself to think so, until the other clearly express his hatred to me.
Although I almost get used to it, it's still better to avoid being alone with him if the situation allows.
Not only I'm going to become more noticeable together with him, being stared with hostility by the pair of blue eyes is also a quiet big challenge.
Recalling the scene we parted on bad terms last week, I look at the man supervising a bunch of swimming students at the pool below. Hayama is popular as always, in stark contrast to the little girl holding a kickboard alone with effort on the other side. Some time ago our serving club received the commission from the school swimming club. They are going to prepare the county swimming match, so no time for teaching primary students. And the task is naturally entrusted to the serving club. Yuigahama therefore pulled in the group of people around Hayama in order to increase manpower. So there is the reason for the situation now as well as last week.
Sighing unconsciously, I walk down the bleachers to greet Tsurumi. Since the last camp where I destroyed her interpersonal relations she's always like this. Though nobody is going to marginalize her with malice after that and her own situation looks much better, she still hasn't got any friends.
Friends, the thing even I myself have no idea how to make. How can I give the correct answer?
That's why there's nothing I can do for her right now. The little girl holding the kickboard looks at me with hesitation. After a while she decides to come here.
"Already know how to swim?"
She shakes her head gently, then adds a sentence: "I'll slowly grasp. Don't need your help."
I ignore her refuse and tell her the defect in her movement I observed just now, as well as the correct posture. She's reluctant, but listens quietly. Later she gropes with her kickboard in the water. This time I catch a glimpse of Hayama who disbands the crowd and come here from the start point.
Since the action in the forest before, Hayama played the bad guy in front of those little girls and this time those girls didn't appear in the teaching group surround him before. Just in case I send Tsurumi away.
"Have you finished?"
After confirming the other side is truly coming at me, I accost.
"Yes."
Hayama wipes his face and hair with the towel hung around his neck and replies casually.
"Hard work, we can speak out."
Again I give a glance to Tsurumi practicing not far from here, and then speak to Hayama.
In silent acquiescence, Hayama passes through me and walks toward the dressing room.
Looking at the back with a sense of déjà vu, I begin to consider how to cope the conversation later.
Anyway, he'll certainly be dissatisfied if I cope like last time.
Sighing again, I follow up slowly.
"How about her now? She wasn't with most of the students there, so my time to care for her is limit."
Leaning against the wall next to the vending machine, Hayama clasps the can with one hand and asks me before drinking.
"I've told her the basic method and the correct movement. She said later she would slowly grope."
I stuffs coins in the vending machine and replies.
"So…"
After taking a sip of coffee, he continues: "and you? Have you thought about how to change?"
I'd like to reply 'it's not so bad, at least no one look for trouble.', but still swallow back the reply promptly.
"... If I know how to change, then it won't be like this right now."
Considering for a moment, I finally decide to tell the truth. Hayama shows no sign of dissatisfaction as wished, just a bitter smile.
"But if someday she wants to make friends again, she can try it on her own initiative." I look at the coffee can in my hand, recalling her manner with effort: "she may be stronger than we imaged, so you don't need to worry too much."
I turn around to see Hayama and happen to hit a pair of bright blue eyes. He seems to have looked at me for a moment, with a relieved smile.
"Thank you, Hikigaya kun."
Then he drains the rest of coffee in the pot and leaves me alone in place.
It is different from the gentle smile showed to others, which mixed with more personal mood, but has even more breath-taking charm, leading me to have a heartbeat illusion for a time.
The feeling is anything but reassuring. I'm thinking quietly while sipping the tasteless coffee in mouth.
-TBC-