DEC 11th

7 p.m.

Call me a silly girl, but I just cannot get Edward out of my head. Oh god, the way he looked at me… almost through me. Like he has known me forever and could see straight through the façade everyone else believes. No one has done that and be okay with what they saw underneath. I bet Dr. Cullen has me all analyzed neatly on his yellow notepad with every quirk and is at least a bit horrified. I mean I am.

Maybe Edward would be okay with my crazy. It would be refreshing for someone to see the real me so I could rest from acting all the time. All the kids at school now know about me is that I'm an elite Swan, loaded, nice, and that I have killer smile and laugh. I only allow them that though, nothing else. I know it would be such a scandal for Mom and Daddy if the press found out the perfect Swan family is not so perfect with their daughter being shipped off to an institution for cutting a little too deep one time. Bad press for Daddy's company. Investors might think that if he cannot control his angsty teen that he cannot run a company and pull their investments out.

This Friday will be better, I know it. Friday I am going to invite Edward to see what I like to do to blow off steam.

DEC 13th

Friday Night

I texted him yesterday- inviting him for a night of fun. I gave no detail except to be prepared for anything. With as little details that I gave him, he agreed anyways. It was around 8:30 p.m. when he pulled up to my house and I hopped into the front seat, greeting him with a smile and a hello.

"So where are we going tonight? It is 8:30 p.m. and I am wearing active wear. Please, tell me this is not a workout date…" he trails off as we ventured down my driveway.

"It is a surprise, you will just have to wait and see." I said giving him a wink and a smile.

"Fine," he says giving me a smile "I will wait." In a tone of submission. Good.

We drove for twenty minutes heading into downtown Seattle to the warehouse district.

"Bella, I am getting worried."

"Oh, toughen up, big baby. We will be fine." I said tearing my eyes from the window to his eyes and flashed him a small smile.

"I am not a big baby. I am just kind of a baby." He replied laughing at himself and I did a little too.

"Oh, turn into this parking lot to the right!" I screamed

"Er- Bella, this is an old warehouse. What are we doing here?" he looked concerned when we pulled up to the building I know so well.

"Blowing off some steam, Edward. Are you in?" I asked with a sudden serious tone to the mood. His stare darkened. No answer needed.

"Good. Then let's go." I commanded as I opened up my door with my small drawstring bag in hand.

"What's that?" He asked pointing to my bag.

"Supplies." I opened it up and pulled a small towel two mouth pieces out. I tossed the unopened one to him as I took mine out of the small marbled blue plastic container.

"The rest of what is in here is basic first aid. Tonight is going to be fun." I said pulling the bag closed in a swift movement. I turned on my heels and headed toward the metal doors of the warehouse, Edward was followed me close behind.

I opened the doors to see the crowd inside gathered in a circle cheering at two brutes beating the living shit out each other. No one in the crowd wore shoes or shirts or jewelry. It was against the rules.

"Bella what is this place?" Edward asked as he shouted over the roaring crowd.

"This is my place. I bought it and started this. We fight each other for pure sport." I yelled back. He just nodded and popped the mouthpiece in and kicked his shoes off along with stripping his shirt off his oh so lean, cut body. This is definitely going to be great. I spotted Jacob the second floor looking down at our usual patrons. He looks concentrated on something. He spotted me too, because he lit up with a smile and a big wave.

"Stay close and listen up." I shout at Edward who looks to be waiting for my next move. I walk into the crowd surrounding the fight. The crowd parted for my entrance and the fight stopped.

"Okay listen up everyone!" I paused to get everyone's attention, which did not take long.

"Tonight is a special night. As I look around I see some new faces around here. So… let's us show these fuckers just what we are about at Riot!" I shout to the whole group. They shouted in agreement

"Good. Since there are new faces here tonight I am going to go over the rules, " I spoke out.

"We do not, I repeat, do not talk about Riot. Second: no weapons or gloves, pure skin to : no shirts or : If it is your first time here, you have to fight." I yell.

"Yes, Ma'am!" the shout to me.

"Good. Edward come here- You, come here." I wave a kid about Edward's age and weight into the ring, both of them make their way into the makeshift ring of people. Edward walks coolly into the ring, ready for anything while the kid, obviously new, walks anxiously up to me not making eye contact.

I step out from between them and let it commence. Edward, fists up, walked around the circle with the lean, not muscular at all, kid. Edward's face turned dark as he glared at the kid like he was a piece of meat ready to tear into it. The weasel took the first step with a wide swing you'd see from a mile a away, he leaned back missing the swing and kicked him square in the chest. Everyone went wild when the kid flew to the ground and skidded to a stop at the edge of the ring. Three people helped him up and tossed him back in the ring toward Edward. I do not think this kid learns, because he walked straight into an uppercut to his jaw, falling, then Edward climbed on top of him and whammed on his face. Left hook. Right hook. Blood spewed from his mouth and face with each blow delivered by Edward.

"FINISH HIM!"

"GET HIM!"

"YEAAAAAAH" The crowd roared at the ongoing fight.

I stepped into the ring. I had to stop it. He might kill him. The kid was limp on the floor in a small puddle of his own blood surrounded his face. I grabbed Edward in a chokehold and slammed him to the ground telling him stop and calm down.

"Fight's over!" I yelled. My people loved it that I choked slammed him. I climbed on top of him and pinned him down by shoulders.

"You did well. Calm down." He took a deep breath and nodded back at me, tapping my shoulder. I got up off of him. I glanced back at the kid still laying on and walked over to him. I studied the damage done to him and smiled.

"Someone get this kid to the back and clean him up." I shouted. Two guys, regulars, came up and grabbed from under the shoulders and dragged him away, his head resting on his chest.

"That was a good fight— what is your name again..?" Jacob came from the crowd. Not parting for him.

"Edward. And thanks. I feel like hell, but I will make it." We laughed at his response. Jacob turned towards me. He looks better than the other guy.

"Bella, you're not fighting tonight are you?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"No I am, I have my own shit to work out." I said sternly

"Okay well, next fight is in a few minutes." he informed and I nodded at him to put him at ease

"I know, Jacob. Who is going to fight me?!" I yelled the last bit to Riot to hear. At first no one answered and it was quiet 'till Geno pushed a girl from the crowd, new.

"Jessica will." He volunteered her. She was pale and burnet, but pretty. Her face wore a hard look. But I am sure I can wipe it off. And god did I want to feel the bittersweet pain of feeling my bare fist connecting with her right cheekbone.

I laughed as I popped the mouth guard in "Okay." I walked into the ring, closing the space between us. Her fist went up as soon as my eye had met hers. I thought she's scared and smirked inwardly. I put my fist up too. We walked around in a circle and everyone gave us a little more room. I walked three steps before I stopped an arm and a half length away from her. I protected my ribs and part of my face. Jessica in full view. I kicked her thigh with a smoothly delivered side kick to test the waters. She went to block, but was too slow. I took the advantage to pop her in the jaw as her arms moved away from her face. She was knocked back a little and stumbled two steps backward. I ran at her in her dazed and slammed her to the concrete floor. Her eyes were squeezed shut, trying to push me off, but there was no way. I grabbed one hand to the floor and placed my knee on it with all my weight. Pining her wrist. I moved the other knee and had put it on her diaphragm causing her to panic and her eyes open. With my right fist tight I slammed it hard down onto her cheek bone. I felt something crack underneath my connected fist. It gave me a rush of blood to the head. I wanted more. I lifted and slammed back down over and over again. Her face was covered in blood. The gash on her cheek bone was bleeding profusely—the blood flowing down on her face and I loved it. A primal nature had become my state and I loved it.

"Bella! She's tapping out!" I heard Edward yell. Snapping me out of my blood driven state. I stopped my fist mid air and collapsed on the floor, but quickly sat up. The crowd was going crazy. And pointing at me. They fucking love this shit.

Jessica still laid on the ground breathing slowly. I got up and walked over to her to offer her a hand.

"Hey, good fight. C'mon let's get you cleaned up," she took my hand and I slowly helped up. "there you go, Jess." Jacob ran over to help get her to the back to get cleaned up. I looked at my knuckles and they were torn to bloody hell. I looked up from my knuckles to see Edward glaring at me then started walking over to me. By now the crowd was dispersing for it was almost time to lock up, I was the last fight of the night.

"That was fucking awesome. Just so you know." He was all bloody. But it wasn't his. It was splattered across his chest and face and his knuckles were too fucked.

"I really needed that." I say back at him.

"Come on, follow me. We should get cleaned up." I led him down the big empty room of the warehouse to a hallway with stairs to the second floor. When we got to the second floor we took a sharp left to my office. I opened the door.

"After you." I said flipping on the light half way in the door and half out.

My office wasn't really an office. No phone or desk. But there is a table with two chairs and a comfy cheap sofa and a small bathroom in the back corner.

"This way." I said walking into the bathroom. Edward followed closed behind.

I hope he doesn't think I am crazy I thought to myself

I flipped the light switch on to reveal a small bathroom with a sink and just a shower head for a whole shower and a drain.

"Here, sit on the counter top and I will clean you up. " I had grabbed the first aid kit from under the sink and a couple of towels. I took the first hand towel and wetted it under cool water. I began wiping the blood off his face and defined torso, I made sure not to get too close to his shorts band. As had I cleaned him up I noticed the kid had barely got him.

"Give me your hands." I demanded Edward making a give it here motion. With no words or expression, he just did. I took the dry cloth and poured rubbing alcohol all over it and had begun patting the dried blood off of his knuckles. The only thing that kid fucked up were his hands.

"Ouch!" he hissed.

"Oh don't be a big baby, I have had much worse from a place like this." I retorted. He just laughed, which dripped into my ears with silk.

"Okay your turn." He slid off the counter to come deathly close to my body. I could feel his hot breath on the top of my head as I looked up at him. He must be at least 6'3 comparing to my small stature of 5'5. He grabbed my hips and turned us to lift me up and sit me down like a child on the counter top. I glared at him looking me over for injuries with wide observant eyes. His eye slowly made their way to mine. God, did I want his lips to just touch mine , but the moment was gone when he saw just how fucked my knuckles were. He touched them tenderly as I took the pain and shoved it down. It almost felt good...

He took two more cloths out and did the same routine I did on him. When he was over he wrapped my hands, they have been more fucked than his tonight, in gauze.

"Thanks." I replied to his kindness.

"No problem, Bells." he replied. Did he just give me a nickname? Oh well, it is cute.

I giggled before I slipped off the counter, but this time I had made sure that I slid down his body with my eyes to his. His arm wrapped around the small of my back and pulled me closer to his warm body. I almost gasped when our noses touched. I was so close to having him. I needed his kiss.

"Just kiss me, please…" I begged quietly, my lips deathly close to his, barely touching his as I spoke and his nails slightly had dug into my skin. Fuck it

I slammed my face into lips and we erupted. He pushed me against the counter, as if he was trying to get as close to me as possible. The kiss almost lasted forever. Our lips only parting for a breath… it was filled with passion. I had never felt the level of connection with another… I have been around this block a few and had I ever had this… passion? No.

He pulled away "Forgive me… I just… your lips…" I laughed in response.

"It's okay, Edward, I wanted it too." I reassured him with my hand on his bare chest.

"What time is it anyway? I have to be home before one."

"Well I don't have a curfew.. and I bet you live pretty far from here." I said

"Kinda, I live just out of town."

"Well we can go to your house." He looked me over. The only clothes I brought are the bloody ones I remain in. At least they were blacker than night.

"Okay. Well than, ready, lass?" he asked offering a hand, I had taken it.

When got down stairs everyone had cleared out. I looked around as we made our way out. The floor is a permanently blood caked floor, stained brown forever. Our footsteps echoed throughout the large metal rectangle of a building. I opened the door letting him out first and then locking up.

He pulled the car around to the door and waited for me. I got in and we took off.

The drive was quiet but once again, not uncomfortable with him which is nice and a relief.

"That was a brutal fight tonight. You showed that girl no mercy."

Looking out the window, watching buildings and people flash by I said calmly "I wanted to destroy something beautiful…"

His house was truly grand. It was a glass house with wooden accents that provided structural support. It was enough for their family. Not lavish and no unneeded space. Simplistic.

"You have a beautiful home" I said in the cool midnight air shutting my door quietly.

"Thank you. Although I cannot take the credit. You will have to give it to my mum." He replied.

I wish my mother would take on the views of having enough instead the idea of filling emptiness with want and need.

"We have to be quiet, my parents are home and asleep. But we shouldn't have to worry about Alice or Rose. I believe they are out for the night." He informed me quietly as he unlocked the door and walked in on our tiptoes.

"Okay" I whispered playfully as I over exaggerated my sneaky movements. He didn't give me a tour, nor did I want one. I mean this is Dr. Cullen's house, I do not need to get to know my therapist.

Instead, he led me straight upstairs in pitch black to his room. His room was just as the outside, simplistic. One platform bed, built in oak shelves filled with every book and CD, and a small crème white lounge chair. The bed had white sheets with the only pop of color in the room of a dark crimson comforter. Oh, god, the view! The whole back wall revealed a beautiful night scene of Washington's forest. This was truly a beautiful home. Perfect.

"Here." Edward had snapped me out own world when he handed me a worn and faded red shirt. I held it up to my shoulders, it was the perfect size for a nightgown.

"Thanks!" I said a little too enthusiastically. I turned around dropping the shirt to the floor and stripped off my athletic spandex shorts off and my sports bra, left in my panties. I bent at the waist to pick up the shirt off the ground and slipped it on. I turned quickly to find his back turned and Edward sliding a shirt over his body. I intended on catching him watching me, but instead he found me gawking at him. He just smirk and walked over to his bed and plopped down like a sack of potatoes. I was exhausted too. I sat next to him and laid down. He turned his head to peek at me from the corner of his vision. He looked like a beautiful, shy child. I just looked at him.

"Hiya…" I said quietly rolling unto my side.

"Hi."

We just watched each other for what it seemed like hours before he started to fade. I stayed up to write, but when I am done I am going to be in his arms. I will make sure of it.