To Comfort a Frightened Thought
"Please! Leave me alone!"
He felt fingers trace his lips as he whimpered pathetically.
"I don't like this," he repeated several times. "I don't like this!"
"But your body says differently."
His body felt cold now. Fingers traced around his manhood softly. Roy bit his lip to keep from moaning. If he made any noise, he would lose. He wanted to believe that this was just a sick game.
"Don't look so embarrassed. It's okay."
"Please, stop."
"Roy..."
"Let me go!"
"Roy..."
"ROY!"
He shot up and looked around. He was still in the Allen's' home on their couch. Barry was hovering over him with a frightened expression on his face.
"Barry-I-"
"Roy," Barry whispered. "You're crying."
The younger man quickly wiped his face. It never occurred to him that he cried in his sleep. He always suspected that it was just sweat. But now he knew. Tears were streaming down his face and he couldn't stop them. He felt lost. He felt ashamed. And now, more than ever, he felt scared.
"I'm sorry," Roy choked out.
He buried his face in his hands and whimpered silently.
"What are you sorry for, Roy?" Barry asked softly.
"Please, just-I'll be fine," Roy sobbed. "I just...I just need..."
"What is it? What do you need?"
Roy was crying now. He couldn't hold it in. He was so confused even now. Even after everything had happened, he was still confused.
"Please, just leave me alone."
Roy should have known better. Barry wasn't going to leave him like this. Not after what he was seeing. He pulled the younger man into his arms and embraced him. He stroked the back of his neck soothingly, cradling him with care.
Roy cried even harder. Barry knew what he'd done; he's cracked open Roy Harper's barrier just enough to see him open up. It was something that Roy rarely allowed. Even now at such a difficult time in his life, he kept his barriers up. Until the moment that Barry pulled him into his lap and cradled him like he was a child.
Roy's fingers gripped the older man's broad shoulders and buried his face in his chest. He stopped crying just enough to get a grip on himself. He was better than this! It had been at least a full month, why would he break down now?
"Roy," Barry whispered.
That name made him cringe inwardly. But there was a way that Barry said it that kept him from being entirely frightened. It was soft and calm. It was caring and loving, unlike the way he'd heard it previously when it slipped into his ear and settled there as a reminder of his pain.
Barry leaned in closer. He was looking deep into those clouded cerulean eyes trying to see what kind of confession he could get out of him.
"Bar-"
Roy could see that there was something in those eyes. Something unexplained.
"-ry."
Soft. Sweet. It tasted of coffee and caramel. The taste on his tongue was familiar. Intoxicating.
"Caramel Macchiato," Roy panted after Barry pulled away.
He was surprised that the kid didn't slap him. He was more surprised to find that Roy pushed himself forward to catch Barry's lips in his again. It was nice to finally have someone there for a change. He'd never been treated with such care in his life.
Not since Donna at least. But she left after Roy confessed to her about what was going on with his life. She couldn't handle it. Not by a long shot.
Roy threw his arms around Barry's neck and deepened the kiss. He took in all the tastes upon his tongue. All the scents that lingered on the front of his uniform. Roy moaned softly as their tongues brushed and played against each other. Barry was skilled with his mouth; he had to give him that.
Barry kept his left hand at Roy's back and slid the right one up his shirt. Not groping, just touching. Rubbing. Massaging. Then his hands trailed down to Roy's waist. His fingers dipped at the waistband of his sweatpants, then past his boxers. That was when Roy had to call it quits.
He pushed away from the older man and scrambled out of his lap. Barry gave him an understanding smile.
"I get it. I'm sorry. I came on too fast."
Roy shook his head. "You don't understand. I-"
He wanted so badly to tell Barry, but the right words wouldn't come out. Barry nodded and kissed his lips one last time before returning to his and Iris's room. Roy sighed and curled himself in the blankets. This was going to be a long morning.
Please forgive me for such a short chapter. A thank you to MyLittleAngel for being the first to review. (You're always my favorite Angel!) I would love to know what you think of the story so far.
~Maxx