A/N: I don't own Glee (Ryan Murphy and Fox do) or anything else you might recognize here (like Disney!) but use them here with love.
"Kurt, you look fine," Rachel insisted, grabbing his arm as she ushered him towards the staff cafeteria. "I heard the food here's pretty decent."
"Honestly, Rach, I'm starved, so for once I don't think I'd care. Where do you suppose our mentor is?" he asked, looking around.
"How about right here?"
Kurt jumped, and Rachel spun around when she heard her.
"Mercedes?" Rachel squeaked, then clapped her hands happily.
"Honey!" Kurt grinned and they hugged, joined by Rachel a second later. "What are you doing here?"
"Same as you both," she smiled at them, "except not on the summer program. This is so great that you're here!"
"How did – I mean – this is great, but -" Rachel spluttered.
"Didn't she used to have breath control?" Mercedes teased, with a sideways glance at Kurt. "Being a mentor is a volunteer thing. I'm not going to be training you, but I'm just here to be a friendly face, show you around the college students' area, help you feel settled in a little. And we mentors get to look at the lists, to see if we know anyone. I had no idea you two would be coming here!"
They smiled at her and she took a look around. "Look, rule number one: unless you want to get mobbed, eat early, like we're doing tonight. Follow me, I'll show you what's good." She glanced behind her and favored them with a wide smile. "Don't worry, I'll answer all your questions. I've been here half a year, and believe me, it's not that complicated."
"You know, the food here actually is pretty decent," Kurt admitted.
"It is. I mean, you can get a little tired of it, but it's really not bad. Even for rabbits like you," Mercedes said to Rachel.
"Vegan," Rachel smirked. "Now, tell us everything!"
Mercedes nodded and gestured at their trays. "All right, we'll clear out of here and go for a walk. Sun's down and it's pretty nice out."
As they left the building she turned to address them both. "It's a bit freer out here. Keep in mind what they drill into you at orientation – smile, don't be negative, and obey the rules for when you're out in the park like it's your religion." She frowned slightly and opened her arms, hands out. "This place is indeed magical, but if you need to vent, do it at home. Your apartments aren't bugged or anything, that's a myth, but really, just try to stay positive. You know where you're staying, right?" They both nodded, as they had already moved into the college student quarters. "You wanna come to my place? Away from The Mouse?"
"Yes. Definitely. I can only do frozen smiles for so long," Kurt said.
"Drama queen," Rachel teased him. "But yes, that sounds lovely."
"Okay, then follow me," Mercedes smiled at them. "My castle's a little less fancy, but I like it."
"I love your castle," Rachel insisted, a short time later. "Nice and cool, comfortable couch, and I love the color scheme."
"And not a Disney logo in sight," Kurt added. "No, wait, sorry, I didn't see that folder over there. But no major design element, so you don't lose any points."
Mercedes laughed. "Girl, has he been dissing the décor nonstop over at Mouse land full time?"
Rachel giggled. "Well, not full time, since I keep reminding him to smile and not glare at anything. But sometimes I think I can hear him judging in my head." Mercedes let out a belly laugh, as Rachel mouthed to Kurt, "It's true."
"That's an exaggeration," Kurt protested. "Design is all about who your target audience is. If your target audience is children, it's completely right to appeal to what they know and love."
"Wait for it," Rachel murmured, sharing a conspiratorial glance with Mercedes.
"But why they would have to go full-on goddamned 'toon in the back rooms – why? I mean, you're not allowed to work there unless you're at least eighteen, so why do half the rooms look like they're outfitted for Disney princesses?" Kurt was stopped mid-rant by the giggles both girls had dissolved into.
After Mercedes was able to stop laughing and catch her breath, she got out, "Oh, Kurt. Baby, you've been holding that in all day."
"Have not," he countered, then chuckled a little. "Okay, I have. But I was good, Rachel."
"That's true, he was," she admitted. "So, tell us all about being Cast Members!"
"Is she always this excited?" Mercedes asked.
"Not necessarily like this in New York. Should I worry?" Kurt snarked.
"Nah, it's all good. Okay, so thank God I never have to do 'fur' anymore," she breathed. "I mean, it's fun to be a giant cartoon character, for like an hour, and I love the kids, don't get me wrong, but those get-ups are freaking hot, and not in a Kurt Hummel fashion sense."
"Yeah, I kind of got that," Kurt lifted an eyebrow.
"They're gonna cover all this in orientation, but just stay near your attendants, and mind their cues for breaks, and you should be okay no matter what."
"Attendants?" Rachel asked.
"Yeah, they're in regular-human clothing and meant to blend in. But they help you if you have a wardrobe malfunction, like if your tail gets stuck or something, they help people take pictures, but most importantly, they take care of you. Make sure you go on your breaks, make sure you're safe -"
"Why?" Kurt interrupted.
"Okay," Mercedes reached for one of the character manuals on her bookshelf, and opened it to a picture of Captain Hook at the Magic Kingdom. "When you've got the big head on, your vision is limited. Your suit is valuable, and believe it or not, they do care about you too. So, they make sure you stay safe, so that you don't fall over something or knock over a bunch of stuff – both of those things are embarrassing – and keep away any stray creeps. I love these guys."
"Where were they in high school?" Kurt muttered.
"Anyway, with any luck you'll do more 'faces' than 'furs'. I mean, no matter how many breaks there are, it's still summer in Florida, and it really does get hot." Everyone nodded their agreement.
"So tell us about what you do," Rachel prompted her.
"Well, girlfriend, I don't do character breakfasts like you two will probably do," she smiled mysteriously.
"Why not?" Rachel looked outraged, but Kurt caught her mood and simply raised his eyebrows.
"Do tell." He smiled at her and gestured.
"Wouldn't want to scare the kiddies over their corn flakes," she laughed evilly. "They'll never cast me as Sleeping Beauty, but everyone knows the villains get all the funnest material."
"Well, Ms. Jones, I never," Kurt teased. "Spill."
"You're looking at Ursula the Sea Witch, and sometimes, Maleficent." She smiled at them broadly.
"Excellent!" Rachel clapped her hands, excited. "Do you get to sing and act?"
"Absolutely, as Ursula. Less with Maleficent, but she's cool to play. Man, some of the kids are terrified of her! But the teenagers tend to love her. You suppose they identify with the dark?"
"Why are you looking at me?" Kurt snorted. "Though I do confess now to being a bit jealous."
"Let me guess," Mercedes smiled at him. "Peter Pan."
"Yes," he admitted, "along with assorted other roles, so long as I keep my mouth shut." Rachel shot a worried glance at him. "Look, it's fine, I get it. Not like I ever thought I'd play Gaston, or wanted to, but my range is good enough for some of those other roles."
"Honey, I know it is," Mercedes reached out and stroked his hand affectionately. "But you're still a little hurt, right?"
"Yeah," he admitted. It kept coming back to this, for him. NYADA was expensive. If you were training to be the next Broadway star, it made sense. But if you were going to be relegated to being a chorus boy the math didn't look so good. Not to him anyway. Even at NYADA he hadn't landed many roles, and he was frustrated by the type-casting. He knew he was lucky to get a character role at Disney, that was what everyone kept telling him, but it still stung.
He looked over at Rachel. They'd talked about it before they left for Florida, though Rachel had tried to avoid the topic. A girl that looked like Quinn would have her pick of Disney princess roles, and Disney didn't hide the fact that they wanted the actors to look like the characters for the 'face' jobs. And Rachel's face didn't fit many of them.
"How about you, Rachel?" their host asked.
Rachel smiled bravely. "Esmerelda and Jasmine. If I'm not too busy being Minnie Mouse or a boy chipmunk. That's not bad, right?"
"Not at all," Mercedes reassured her. "All right, we'll get right down to what to expect, but I know you two can do it. And no, that's not the required Disney positivity-speak talking. I mean it."
A/N: So, for Cast Members (yes, they capitalize that for Disney, all the time), the 'faces' and 'furs' thing is really their shorthand for the performers. Also, the Mouse (and variations on that) are capitalized since it's short for Mickey Mouse. I promise there'll be Glee-style singing moments, as well as other characters (no spoilers!) but now the stage is set. As always, I'd love to hear from you if you're so inclined.