Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, etc.
Neither of them wanted to knock.
Bella elbowed Edward in the side. He gave her an exasperated look and knocked quietly, as if he didn't want Emmett to hear at all.
They heard crashing noises of a labtop being slammed shut. Half a second later, Emmett appeared at the door.
"Hey, sex-crazed bro! Hey, Bella," he boomed, grinning evilly. This was going to be fun for him. In other words, pure torture for them. He shuffled them into his messy room. They moved unwillingly.
"Now," he smirked, "I'm not sure how much you know about this, but I'm going to have to start with the basics. We'll start with Edward." He pointed to Edward's crotch.
"This is called…"
BELLA POV
This isn't happening. This isn't happening. It's just a disgusting, terrible dream, I chanted repeatedly in my head. It was too horrific.
"Maybe this is worse than I thought," Emmett pondered. "If you don't even know that –"
"EMMETT!" I shrieked.
"You figured it out?" he looked incredulous. I couldn't even tell if it was acting or not. "Well, what is it?"
"Ugh, ugh, ugh! I know what it's called – you just have to make me say it out loud, don't you?" I growled in frustration.
"Yup."
"It's called – his – manhood, okay?"
Emmett burst into loud laughter.
"You can't cut corners, Bella. I'll let that slide by this time," he shook his head.
I was going to kill Alice one day for this.
"But Edward isn't getting educated right now!" he announced. "It's his turn." He pointed to my crotch. I felt the all-typical blush coming on. "Now, that is called a…"
Edward sealed his lips shut.
"Okay, so I can see this isn't going anywhere…now. That is called a vagina." He pointed to Edward's crotch again. I probably turned two shades redder. "And that is called a – Bella, care to help me out here?"
I shook my head vigorously. "Not a chance."
"Alrighty, then. That is called a penis. Should we measure it?"
"NO!" Edward and I shouted in unison.
"You know, I never knew if you or I was bigger. I still think we should measure it," Emmett decided.
Edward grinded his teeth. Probably wondering if it would be worth it to punch Emmett or not.
"We," Edward snapped, "Are not going to be measuring it."
"Okay, okay. I was just curious," Emmett grinned. "Moving on. I think we're going to have to watch some videos on how to do it."
He opened his labtop.
I'm sorry I couldn't write anymore. I was feeling really lazy today.
If you have any suggestions, please let me know. I was just thinking that as long as they don't really have sex, that's basically the point. It won't really matter if he fingers her or not. What are your opinions? Please review :)