How Far Can Idiocy Go? Part II Chapter 2: Idiocy V, a gakuen alice fanfic

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How Far Can Idiocy Go? Part II

by: Sorrowful Princess

Genre: Humour/Romance

Pairing: NatsumeXMikan

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Disclaimer: I do not own Gakuen Alice and I do not have as much geniosity as Higuchi Tachibana has. But I'll do my best to satisfy the readers.

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The place that was once full of laughter and mocking stunts suddenly turned so silent it's as if someone had just died. The guy who always makes golden sparks float in the air and who was standing over a table to show off suddenly toppled over and landed on the floor. The girl who can travel through mirrors gagged and dropped everything she's holding, including her precious reflectioners and a small flowery vase. The weird kid who always says ridiculous puns had his jaw dropping to the floor as a fly zoomed right into his open mouth and yet no one had noticed.

Misaki's eyes were bulging out from their sockets, and Tsubasa Andou's face was so white you'd think his blood had been pumped out of his system.

Everyone was looking dumbstruck at the brunette who was smiling like a complete idiot by the door.

All was silent. And it was Misaki's voice that broke it first.

"Why, Mikan, that joke was funny!" Misaki forced herself to laugh and her voice went a little higher than intended.

Then everyone followed and laughed too, thinking that Mikan really did just joke. Tsubasa was the last one to get back to his senses and when he noticed everyone's laughing, he laughed as well, though a little awkward.

"Haha Mikan, that was brilliant! For a second, I thought you'd gone mad!" Misaki continued to laugh.

Everybody cackled yet again. Tsubasa forced a laugh which sounded more of choking.

"Really, Mikan, you're getting good at making jokes, but next time don't joke someone about that! It's creepy!" Tsubasa said, still having that choking sound.

The brunette looked thoroughly confused. Creepy, he said? What's creepy about making love? They must have misunderstood her, yes that must be it. After all, she's not at all joking.

"I mean it!" said Mikan suddenly, causing for the laughter to die away. She looked at Tsubasa intently, her eyes sparkling with enthusiasm. "I mean it, Tsubasa-senpai! I want to make love with you! And it's not at all creepy, you know! It's absolutely fun!"

Tsubasa's lips suddenly turned white with Mikan's statement. He looked at her, eyes bewildered.

"W-What are you saying, Mikan?" he stammered.

Mikan gleamed. "I said I want us to make love!"

The shadow manipulator felt as if something big was stuck on his throat. He forced it down by gulping ever so loudly.

Mikan said she wanted to make love.

Make love.

She wanted to have freaking -toot!- with her senpai! Looking thoroughly at Mikan, it was then that they realized Mikan was serious.

So damn serious.

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Tsubasa

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It's nice being here in the Special Ability Class again. Really, our once a week meeting isn't enough. I always crave for more. But actually, it was the company of my friends that I like the most. Though everyone calls us weirdoes, I am proud to say we are the kindest and most considerate class there is. For one, we have the friendliest and most approachable teacher.

Everyone's having fun as usual. Golden sparks are floating everywhere, laughter and jokes are booming through the whole place.
We have free time again. Noda-sensei is in one of his time trips, you see.

I roamed my eyes around. Hm? So Mikan isn't here yet, is she? Late again, probably. Oh well, she'll be here in a minute. I know it.

And just right after I thought that, I heard running footsteps, then the door suddenly opened with a loud bang.

Mikan was by the door, smiling radiantly, as a shadow moved from behind her. Hey, wait. Shadow?

I focused my eyes behind her and saw the black cat, Natsume Hyuuga, panting. He must've run too. And just as he opened his mouth to call the brunette, Mikan greeted me.

"Tsubasa-senpai!" she looked so happy. I wonder why?

I smiled at her. "Yes? You look quite excited, Mikan."

She beamed even more. "Tsubasa-senpai! Make love with me!"

...

What -

W-WHAT DID SHE SAY? Did she just ask me to make love with her? Did she just ask me to have sex with her? As in have SEX?

Oh God, this can't be! I mean, she's too young! If I agreed, I'll be sued of child abuse or even rape!

Hey wait, what the hell am I thinking? Maybe she didn't mean it! I mean, hell, she looks so innocent. And I trust Mikan-chan isn't that kind of girl. But still! Asking me that kind of question with that look on her face! It's... It's...!

Everything was so silent. I heard something like a vase broke, or was that only my imagination?

No one dared to talk. After all, the question was too shocking.

'Tsubasa-senpai! Make love with me!'

I would have preferred it if she had asked me to eat an evil turd instead. It would be much more bearable. But no, she asked me to have sex! I mean, how am I supposed to react with that?

"Why, Mikan, that joke was funny!" Misaki's strained and forced voice followed by an unconvincing laugh rang in my ears.

Then everybody laughed too, and I had no choice but to laugh with them. Maybe, Mikan was really joking. No. I know she's really joking! She's a hundred percent joking! She SHOULD be joking!

"Haha Mikan, that was brilliant! For a second, I thought you'd gone mad!"

Yeah, I thought so too. I thought she became a pervert or something. But that can't possibly happen. I forced out a laugh.

"Really, Mikan, you're getting good at making jokes, but next time don't joke someone about that! It's creepy!" I tried to chuckle, though in reality, that wasn't such a good joke. It was really creepy.

But Mikan's smile slightly wavered. She looked kind of...affronted? She looked as if we had understood her. Why so?

"I mean it!" she said suddenly, causing for the laughter to die away. She looked at me intently, her eyes sparkling with enthusiasm.
"I mean it, Tsubasa-senpai! I want to make love with you! And it's not at all creepy, you know! It's absolutely fun!"

My lips suddenly felt so dry. What does she mean she meant it? WHAT DOES SHE MEAN? And fun? Sex is fun? I mean, sure, sex is fun at times but-no! What the hell am I thinking? I shouldn't think things like this, I'll burn in hell! Despite my mental war, I looked at her and I couldn't deny the fact that I'm quite bewildered.

"W-What are you saying, Mikan?" I stammered.

She beamed yet again, like what she's about to say is the greatest and most exciting thing of all. It almost freaked me out. "I said I want us to make love!"

A thick and big lump got stuck in my throat and I gulped to force it down. I saw her eyes, and from that point on, I learned she is really serious. She really wants to make love with me.

Make love.

Grandma of Zeus, what am I supposed to say? Or do? The poor girl wants to have -toot!- with me!

Oh gosh, Mikan, whatever happened to you?

Is this the effect of puberty to her?

Oh my, puberty is scary after all!

Suddenly, a murderous looking Natsume entered the scene. His hands were on his pockets, but his eyes were blazing. He looked as if he'd bite my head off. Then he turned to glare at Mikan.

When Mikan saw him, she beamed. "Oh Natsume! I didn't know you're here! You decided to pay a visit in our class?" she asked.

It was a pretty normal question, but the answer she got and we all heard from him was something I never dreamed he would dare say.

"Who says you can make love to anyone other than me?" Natsume Hyuuga asked, his voice venomous.

What in the freaking world did he just say? 'Other than me, he said'? 'Other than ME'? Did he mean Mikan can only make love with him?

I felt like something had struck me hard on my head. My vision swirled. I grew dizzy.

I expected Mikan would tell Natsume off, but to my utter disbelief, she grinned at him and said:

"Well, I can make love to anyone I want, can't I? I told you I'd like to make love with Hotaru and Tsubasa-senpai."

The black cat glared at her. "I told you not to ask anyone else, didn't I? Especially that freak Andou?" he cast me an annoyed look.

Mikan's brows twitched. "And I told you you can't order me around, Natsume. So what if I asked Tsubasa-senpai?" she shot at him.

A very annoying smirk flashed on Natsume's face. "You asked me first," he said.

Gasps.

WHAT THE HELL! Mikan asked Natsume to have sex too? And she asked him first?

"Yeah I did." I heard Mikan say.

"And you told me you'd like to do it in an open area, under the sun," Natsume said, a smirk still playing at his lips. "I agreed."

My eyes practically slipped out from its sockets and I felt my jaw dropped. Cold sweat trickled from my forehead.

OPEN AREA?

UNDER THE S-SUN?

Oh God, dirty and nasty thoughts, be gone! I don't wanna think about it! Why in the freaking world would Mikan want to make love in an open area? And under the sun? They plan to actually do it at day time?

"Yeah I know!" Mikan happily said. "I didn't forget it, you know! We'll still make love tomorrow, but I just thought I'd ask Tsubasa-senpai now so that we can make love on the next day! I mean, we all can't make love at the same day, can we? It'll be too exhausting!"

Gasps.

E-EXHAUSTING?

Of course it'll be exhausting! Shit. That Mikan, it seemed she really knew what she's saying! Suddenly, I began to see her in a different light. The light obviously shouted the word 'danger'.

She turned to me, her eyes glinting. "So, Tsubasa-senpai, can we make love the next day?" she asked.

I couldn't answer. I couldn't force the voice out. I'd gone totally mute, I think. I simply stared at her. It was Natsume who answered her.

"Idiot, I told you not to ask him!" he growled.

Mikan stuck her tongue out at him. "Bleh! Why should I listen to you, you meanie Natsume? Anyone deserves my company! ANYONE can make love with me if they want!" she stubbornly said.

Gasps.

Double shit.

She said anyone can make love with her! Holy crow, this is turning crazy! Is this really the side-effect of puberty?

Suddenly, Natsume grabbed Mikan's sleeve and started dragging her towards the exit.

"Hey! Let go of me, Natsume!"

"Shut up," Natsume growled. "You won't ask anyone else because I said so. You won't need anyone else, anyway-" then he threw me an irksome look, "-because I'll give you joy."

Then he continued on dragging the whining Mikan away from us, while we remained as still as statue.

I glared at him. That pervert, what did he mean he'll give her JOY?

I won't let him violate her! Never!

But still, as I look after Mikan and the one dragging her, I suddenly felt sooo freaked out. I'm having goosebumps. Of course, I'm not the only one who feels that way. After all, it's not everyday Mikan asks someone to make love.

Make love.

Oh Lord, puberty can be really horrifying! Those naughty hormones, I know it's their fault! Goodness, what happened to innocent
Mikan Sakura? What the hell just happened to her?

Damn.

-x-

Natsume

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"Tsubasa-senpai! Make love with me!"

Anger and irritation boiled up inside me like hot molten lava. My vision got a little darker, and all I could see now was the stunned faces of these stupid Special Ability types students, all gaping like morons. The only person who actually has the guts to smile in this situation is this nutty panty-girl named Mikan Sakura.

That idiot. I told her not to ask the freak! She never listens to me.

I watched with a scowl plastered on my face as the scene unfolds before me. Obviously they were all astounded with what the idiot had said. I remember very well the time when she had asked the same stupid question at me. She says she wanted to make love with me. Damn, was I shocked. I thought she had gone mad-which is true in a sense-and out of her mind. I mean, who in their right mind would ask me to make love with her in front of everyone? Of course, the fan girls were out of the window. God knows they're willing to kill for such trivial things.

What I'm actually saying is: I never expected nor dreamed the panty girl would say something like that. Sure, she's an idiot, but I never thought her idiocy would go that far.

And must I say, REALLY far.

It was sooo far I couldn't almost reach her. She was just impossible.

Yeah, she's a moron.

She's stupid.

She's the best idiot of the century.

Yet I lov-

What the fuck. I almost thought of the impossible and cursed and unforgivable words!

Hey, I'm not trying to deny anything! I just thought it's kind of rubbish! So why am I angry? Yeah, I'm angry because she asked that shadow-freak. It's not like I'm jealous. Far from. It's just that her idiocy annoys me very much.

It annoys me so much and it eventually made me angry. Yeah, that's it.

She asked me first, so why was she asking anyone else?

Not like I own her or anything, I just thought that the freak must be having a mental battle of insanity right now just like what I experienced when she told me to make love with her.

I pity the freak. But that doesn't mean he doesn't annoy me.

I heard a few forced laughter and exchange of words but my brain couldn't quite comprehend them.

I decided to enter the scene. Since the idiot and the freak annoyed me so much, I'll annoy the hell out of them, too. So how will I do it?

That's quite easy.

And so, I stepped onto the spot light and threw my starting blow: "Who says you can make love to anyone other than me?"

It was meant to tease her as much as everyone else, but once the words were out, my irritation reached its peak point and whatever I said or did after those words were not well thought of.

It was when I dragged her out of that cursed room that I was able to somehow have a clear mind. I realized what I did earlier, telling them that the idiot and I are supposed to make love and that she asked me first... their priceless reaction about that little peace of information gave me a wicked feel of triumph and satisfaction. Especially when I saw the freak's ghostly pale face when I said I'll give the panty-girl joy. He obviously got my meaning.

I'm still dragging the moron through the corridor, and she was whining so loudly that I feel as if my eardrums would bleed any minute by now.

"...said let go of me! I want to go to Tsubasa-senpai! I haven't heard his answer yet!" Polka screamed.

"Shut your mouth." I growled.

As expected, this sentence only made her scream more loudly.

"YOU shut your mouth!" she shouted. "Why did you have to drag me away, anyway? What if he agreed? What if he also wanted to make love with me? Let me go back, Natsume! I want to hear his answer!"

Images of Polka and the freak doing you-know-what flashed in my mind and it's not at all nice. An unexplainable feeling surged inside me.

I gritted my teeth. "I said shut up!"

"Let me go back, Natsume! Let me go! I want to make love with Tsubasa-senpai!"

"Making love is sex, you idiot!" I blurted out without thinking and I soon regretted what I said.

She looked at me with a perplexed expression and asked in a small, innocent voice, "Sex?"

Fuck. Now I told her the key word. Obviously, she doesn't know of it, but knowing her, she'll probably search all the mountains and seek all the deepest waters of the world just to find out what it means.

Shit. I'm such a damn genius.

Now what?

"Let me go back, Natsume! Let me go! I want to make love with Tsubasa-senpai!"

With a sharp turn, Natsume glared at her and almost shouted, "Making love is sex, you idiot!"

The brunette looked at him, perplexed.

"Sex?" she asked in a small, innocent voice.

Natsume's face slowly turned blue. Obviously, he had said the least thing he wanted to say to her. He was at a loss for words.

"Sex?" Mikan repeated, still having that innocent look on her face.

Natsume stared at her for a few moments, and without a word, he let go of her as he turned his back on her and started walking away.

Mikan, who is thoroughly confused, practically called out to the flame caster.

"Hey, Natsume! Where do you think you're going?"

But she received no answer from him. Soon, he was no longer in sight and he had left her with something to wonder about. Mikan stared at the direction where he had left and asked herself:

Sex?

What is sex?

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to be continued ...

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A/N: So there's the second chapter! Uh, hey, do you think I'm kind of, you know, stepping on the line? I mean, this story's getting bolder haha but what can I do? It's supposed to happen. I don't want Mikan to not know the word 'sex' in this story. Anyways, as you have noticed, there are A LOT of grammatical errors there. Guess why? Yeah, I've rushed things up. You see, I chose to write this even though I have a research paper, an article, a book report, reports for other two subjects, an interpretative dance and more things to worry about. Most of the things I mentioned there are to be passed tomorrow. Yep, tomorrow! It's killing me... Deadlines could really be the end of me haha! Gosh there's just so much to do. But then I thought of you guys who are waiting for the next release of this story so... here it was! I hope the story isn't trashy despite the inability of my brain to give me the right words for the reactions I pictured.

I just hope you liked it. After all, this story is all for you! Of course, you know what to do now that you've read the second chapter. Well, what else is there? Reviews, of course! Please please please tell me what you feel about it! I will really appreciate it! May it be a criticism or not, I'll be happy!

Maybe the next chapter would be the last. I told you, I don't want to prolong this because it'll not turn out that good.

Well then, now that all has been said, I think I should say good bye for now!

I should get some sleep really. I look like a zombie now hahaha just joking. But I'm almost near being a zombie. But I can't sleep yet (sighs). I have to finish what I have to finish. Ugh. College works-they're really robbing the energy off of me.

Thank you for reading my story and my rantings.

Lovelots,

-Eurice-

PS: Thanks for all of the reviews you submitted on my previous chapter!