Chapter 1 is completed. In the end it was more difficult than I thought :-) I changed the chapter a bit while writing, so it isn't like I planned at first, but I hope you like it. In this chapter Alec is his selfless self, Izzy fusses over her big brother, Magnus hides something and Simon and Jace face an unexpected situation...
I hope you enjoy it - please let me know, also if you don't like this chapter.
Happy reading!
...
...
...
Alec opened his eyes. He stared at a plain white ceiling – perfectly white, no cracks or holes in it and with the strange mixture of bitter herbs and disinfectant in the air he instantly knew where he was: in the infirmary of the New York Institute. Thankfully he closed his eyes and let the strange and detached feeling wash over him only healing and painkiller runes can give. Someone must have given him a lot of them.
Alec tried to remember what has happened and came up blank. He could remember being in the alley behind the office building where Lilith was hiding. Than he remembered only flashes of a fight with Jace – no, of a fight with the Owl – it wasn't his parabatai who has attacked him. Than a feeling of pain and agony. Pictures of Jace with two seraph blades in his hands, Jace breaking his wrist, Jace with one of his arrows in his hand, Magnus's face hovering above him, stricken with fear and tears in his eyes…
As hard as Alec tried to remember he only got flashes, pictures, some feelings, but I couldn't finish the puzzle. Some pieces were missing, some he didn't know where to place.
With a deep breath he opened his eyes again, lifted his head a bit, waited until the wave of dizziness had passed and let his eyes wander over his body.
He lay on a simple infirmary bed with a metallic bed-head, white sheets tugged tightly around his long legs and pulled up to his belly where his bandaged right hand lay. He remembered the pain fire through his arm and body as the Owl had broken his wrist. His bare chest was wrapped in stark white gauze. Suddenly more pictures of memory came rushing back to him. The Owl stabbing him with his own arrow – slowly and with sneering smile on his face. They say the worst pain a Shadowhunter can feel is the loss of his parabatai. Come here. It's time for Jace to finally feel it.
Hearing a soft stir to his left side he turned his head and looked at Magnus. Someone has pushed the bed Magnus lay in close to his own, leaving no distance between the two of them. His love lay on his side, facing Alec, the tousled bedsheet clutched in his hands and his head bedded on a soft and fluffy cushion.
Colorful sparks of light that the golden rays of sunlight sent through the high stained glass windows played on his bedsheet, creating colored pools on the fabric like paint on canvas. The flashes of light left glittering streaks in his dark hair and on his golden face, his bare shoulder, playing with the jeweled rings on Magnus's hands. Although this scene should be peaceful, it wasn't. Even asleep Magnus looked utterly exhausted, deep lines hardening his face. And something else seemed different, strange and changed.
Like Magnus could feel being watched, he slowly opened his eyes, blinked several times and finally fixed his eyes on Alec.
"Hey." Alec whispered. His voice was hoarse with sleep and thirst.
Magnus smiled a sleepy smile "Hey. Finally awake – my sleeping beauty."
Alec lifted his left hand, searching for Magnus'. He unclenched the bedsheet, tugging the hand of the Shadowhunter with both of his.
"Are you hurt?" Alec asked.
Magnus shook his head, burying it deeper in the pillow. "No, I'm unhurt."
"You don't look so."
"Alexander – no, I'm – I'm fine. I'm just exhausted. Enormous magic melt down…" he smiled a weak smile. "But how are you? Any pain?"
"No. Painkilling runes" Alec shrugged a bit and regretted it at once. He grimaced. "Maybe I need some new ones. But otherwise tired and confused - mostly tired. But Magnus…"
"Yes?"
Alec turned his head again to the left to face his boyfriend "Please tell me what happened to you… you look so… I don't know… different… you don't… sparkle anymore. So I don't believe you, that you're fine."
"Alexander, I've lost my… I've just lost consciousness trying to save you or better while Catarina saved you, she took on my strength. I'll sparkle soon enough again. And for the rest of the story… I'll tell you later, okay? Go back to sleep and I'll search for someone to give you some more painkilling runes. Fine?"
Magnus started to rise from the bed and Alec was about to stop him, feeling that his boyfriend was still hiding something from him, when the door opened and Isabelle came in.
Izzy was wearing high heeled black boots, a dark blue tight jeans and a deep cut blouse with white and blue stripes showing her angelic rune. She carried a tray with some glasses and a bottle of water on it. As she realized that both men were awake her face lit with a broad smile. She rushed to them and only her Shadowhunter grace prevented the glasses and bottle from falling to the floor.
"Big brother! You gave us totally the creeps!" Izzy placed the tray on the nightstand and sat on the bed beside her brother "I'm so happy to see you awake!" She squeezed his shoulder and made Alec wince a bit.
"Hey, Mags!" she added with a lopsided smile to Magnus.
"Ouch." Alec replied. "You're okay, little sister?"
"Yes, just some scratches and bruises. Nothing to worry about." she answered and Alec asked: "Actually I tried to persuade Magnus to tell me what has happened. But he won't, but maybe you're a bit more informative?"
"Oh, Alec, come on. This can wait." Izzy seemed to share Magnus opinion.
"Yes. And actually I was looking for someone to give Alec some more painkilling runes" Magnus supported and got up, shrugging on a fluffy pink bathrobe over his black silk pajama pants.
"That will be me then" Izzy smiled, gestured Magnus to sit down again and started fussing over Alec. She went over to one of the other beds, fetched a second pillow and tugged it under Alec's back, ignoring his protest. As he sat in his bedstead rather than lied, she poured him a glass of water and pressed it in his hand. With her stele she traced some runes on his flat stomach and his shoulders that spoke of healing and curing.
"Finished" she smiled.
"Thank you, Izzy. Really." Alec's tone was calm… an angry calm. "But now please tell me what has happened. How long was I asleep? Is everyone fine? And don't tell me to go back to sleep, I can't anyways with you two fussing over me."
Magnus rolled his eyes and give Isabella a "go ahead" gesture.
"Okay, but just the basics. I know you won't stop asking, until you get what you want." Izzy sat down beside her brother. "You were asleep for two days, almost three. And most of us are fine. And Jace is Jace again."
Alec let go of a breath, he didn't know he was holding. "So what happened in that office building?"
"We haven't figured everything out, yet. But we know for sure that Simon made it to Clary and Lilith in the penthouse. He freed her and together they tricked Lilith. She attacked Simon and activated Simon's Mark of Cain. We think… or we know that that sent her back to Edom. Meanwhile Magnus came back from Edom, just in time to stop the Owl from killing you, he broke the hold Lilith had on Jace and banished the Owl. He called on Catarina to save you."
"That's all?" Alec asked. Looking exhausted but also determined to get to know everything.
"No. What we don't know is if Lilith succeeded in awakening Jonathan and we also don't know what has happened to Clary. After the Mark of Cain was activated there was an explosion… Clary is… Jace is back at the office building digging for clues."
"So Clary is dead?" Although Alec was never close to Clary he felt a wave of sadness and grief wash over him.
"We don't know for sure… and until we've got no proof, she is missing." Izzy replied, but her tone gave away that there was no hope of finding Clary alive.
"What I can't get", Alec yawned as the runes Izzy gave him started to kick in "is why Catarina was there. Why didn't you heal me, Magnus?"
Magnus looked really uncomfortable as he answered: "Catarina is the better healer…?" Izzy shot him furious glances and some kind of unspoken conversation happened between the two of them with a lot of blinking, staring and jerky nods. "And I was really exhausted from curing Jace." he finally closed the topic.
Before Alec could ask more questions his eyelids fell down and he was fast asleep.
...
Simon walked for hours. Up and down the streets of New York with no idea where to go, with no place to be, with no clue where his walk will lead him. He kept thinking about the saying "Not all who wander, are lost" – but he felt lost. And alone. He was missing Clary. And he blamed himself for what has happened to her.
It's already been three days since she was… he couldn't even think the word "dead" – but it was the truth. He had to finally wrap his mind around the fact that she was gone, gone for forever, dead. But he couldn't. Simon still had the feeling that she was around. When he walked down the streets, he saw her red hair flash in the distance and when he ran to catch up, he must notice that it was an entirely different person. Every time his phone rang, his first thought was "Clary" and then he was disappointed that a different name was written on the display, although he knew that she will never call again. Several times he had started to dial her number, only to drop his phone, when he realized no one will pick it up.
He had started to pace to and fro in the apartment he shared with Kyle, tormented with an unrest and with guilt, until his flat mate had sent him for a walk. And there he was, wandering the streets for hours. Once he had ended up in front of the Institute, wondering if he should go in, maybe talking to Izzy. Or maybe even Jace – Clary's boyfriend. But then he went further on – he couldn't stand Izzy's fear for her brother Alec, who was still unconsciousness and Jace's own mourning. Not yet – not now.
He wanted so badly to talk to Clary. Tell her what had happened at his home, that Heidi had tried to kill his mother and sister, that he has bitten his sister and nearly murdered her, hadn't Izzy stopped him, that he had to enchant his mother to stop her from revealing that he was a vampire, that he had to tell his own mother that he had died in an accident. He wanted to let her know, that at least his sister was still on his side, despite everything what had happened. He wanted to talk with Clary about what had happened in the penthouse of the office building, where Lilith had her hiding place. That they had succeeded in saving the world, but his best friend had died doing so – and that it was his fault.
Simon snapped out of his misery as a honking cab nearly hit him. As he looked closer to his surroundings, he found himself in front of the office building where Clary died three days ago.
...
Jace sat close to the edge, his legs dangling over the rim of the office building, the same house Simon was standing in front of. Since the fight with Lilith he had spent nearly every minute at the top of the edifice searching for clues. He only went back to the New York Institute for some quick showers, some hours of sleep and some short visits in the infirmary, checking if Alec had already woken up. But he was pulled back to the building, somehow he had to be there, to stay there. What if Clary hadn't died in that explosion. What if she was somehow saved? But if, where was she? He had the feeling that if he stayed on the top of that building, she will magically come back to him.
But if not? He just found the love of his life – against all odds. Since the first time he saw her, in front of the Pandemonium, he was drawn to her, was attracted and then finally fell in love with her. With Clary at his side he felt like he never felt before. With her he could totally be himself - not Valentine's son - okay, adoptive son - not one of the most promising Shadowhunters of his generation, not the poor orphan to be pitied. With her he was simply Jace.
He just found her, only to be separated from her again. He wasn't allowed to love her, to be close to her, because he was his sister. Jace thought this were the most horrible weeks in his life – he felt like dying from the inside. But this was much more worse. Losing her forever.
After it turned out that Valentine had lied and Clary wasn't his sister, they were so happy. Too short and then he lost her once again. Lilith got her hold on him, tearing him away from his love… trapping him inside his own body, making him watch from the inside how his own hands nearly killed her, how his mouth spoke cruel words, he didn't mean, how he stopped loving her…
After Magnus broke the hold Lilith had on him, he had the slightest hope that he could fix it, make Clary love him again, make her forgive and finally be happy. But all was shattered into pieces as he reached the top of the office building three days ago and Simon told him that Clary was dead – that Simon had killed her.
"Jace?"
...
Simon made his way up the stairs, passing "Do not enter" and "Construction site" signs. As he reached the top of the staircase, he opened the door that led to the former penthouse, where Lilith had her hiding place. From the outside there was no sign, that an explosion so violent had happened, that the whole upper floor was destroyed. As soon as he yanked it open the full destruction was visible and although Simon knew what to expect, he was shocked.
From where he stood he had an spectacular view over the Empire State Building and Manhattan, the sun was almost set and her last warm rays painted the city golden.
The explosion had destroyed all surrounding walls, except the one he was standing in front and which was a desolate memorial of the penthouse's grandeur with its ornamented blue and golden silk tapestry. Small and bigger chunks of concrete lay scattered on the floor, some with protruding metal pieces like rusty bones. In the middle of the space stood a big tomb made out of stone, blackened with grime and with spidery cracks in it.
Right after the blast Jace and he had scanned through the debris, hoping to find anything that would give them hope, but they found nothing – no hints what has happened to Clary, or even Jonathan. So why did he feel drawn to that place, Simon wondered.
Simon stepped further into the room, started to walk around the tomb and stopped dead. Someone was sitting on the edge, his hair a golden halo and obvious unaware that he wasn't alone on the rooftop.
"Jace?"
The Shadowhunter jumped up and was on Simon, knocking them both to the ground. He moved so fast that even with his vampire speed Simon couldn't evade the attack.
"How dare you?" Jace snarled, baring his teeth, his hands on Simon's throat.
Simon fought the urge back to defend himself, to stay as motionless as possible.
"How dare you to come here, murderer?!"
"Jace, stop it, it's me! Simon!", he tried to speak comforting around this fangs, which had popped out - which was impossible and to make it even worse he added: "And otherwise, you know, you can't kill me that way".
"But maybe with that", Jace drew a seraph blade out of his waistband. Simon's survival instincts and vampire reflexes took over and he caught Jace's hand midair.
"STOP IT! What's wrong with you?!" Simon struggled to keep the seraph blade from his face. He was probably stronger than the Shadowhunter, but Jace was so in rage that his anger increased his strength. "I do not want to hurt you."
"Try it", Jace growled and but in some extra force, bringing the blade down, inch by inch.
Simon decided it was time to take over and get the control back. He put his full power in his grip and drove the blade back. Before the bones in Jace's hand could snap, he let go of it. The knife fell clattering to the ground. The vampire used his advantage and kicked Jace hard, sending him several feet flying through the air and crashing into the stone tomb.
"This won't happen again". Jace struggled to his feet and was ready to attack again, but Simon was faster and wrestled him down, using his full vampire strength to hold him down.
Jace tried to twist away, but Simon's arms were like iron bars, pinning him to the ground, fingers digging into his shoulders. The daylighter used his whole body to press the Shadowhunter down: his legs fixed the kicking one's of the other boy, his knees plowing into the muscular tights, his upper part of his body pressed against Jace's. Simon could feel Jace's abdomen rising and falling with every gasp, both their breaths going fast and fierce with rage and anger, he could sense the hard cords of muscles shift as Jace fought to get free, both only separated by two thin layers of fabric. Jace's golden hair in his eyes – smelling of soap and sunlight and underneath the salty and ferrous smell of blood.
Simon suddenly remembered flashes of a similar situation not too long ago, as Valentine had cut his throat, leaving him dying. Jace came right in time to save him. The remembered Jace under him – limp, not struggling – his live pouring out of him with his blood, both flowing into his mouth, saving him.
I could have killed you.
I would have let you.
"Jace, what the hell is wrong with you?!", Simon yelled, but Jace didn't answer and so he held him down, until his rage finally dissolved into tears – tears Jace had held back for too long.