Boy, these two really don't know how to stop, do they? Even if I, as the author, am the one making them do this... heh... They're just too amusing to leave alone... especially Inuyasha. Really, does any Inuyasha fanfic writer not have the urge to torture our little Inu-kun, at least a little?

Eleven months later...

"Hey, hey, don't faint on me, woman!" He said, gently shaking Kagome by the shoulders.

She shoved him away and knelt shakily on her hands and knees in the dust. "I'm not... fainting... you... idiot," she panted. "I'm in pain! Kaede's... we've got to get -"

The rest of her words were lost as Inuyasha snatched up his mate and ran off in a whirlwind reminiscent of Kouga's. "Just hold on Kagome, it'll be okay. I've got you," he murmured into her hair.

A short while later...

"I HAAATE YOU, INUYASHAA!!!" she screamed from within the house. "YOU'RE THE ONE WHO GOT ME PREGNANT, SO WHY CAN'T YOU BE THE ONE TO FUCKING GIVE - ah! Oh God... ohh..."

"Push, Kagome-san... that's it... push," murmured the midwife who'd been fetched. She had been advised beforehand by Kaede to ignore any strange behaviour from the young woman and her hanyou mate. So far, it had proved sound advice.

"BITCH, YOU THINK IT'S SO FUCKING EASY TO LISTEN TO YOU SCREAM LIKE A STUCK PIG?" came the roar from the other side, where Inuyasha was occupying himself by carving all the trees to splinters. Despite his words, his white ears were swivelled in the direction of the house.

He added, "And it's called 'with pup', not pregnant, woman!"

When Kagome's only response was to moan in pain, he twitched and the next tree met a particularly violent end.

A moment later Kagome had recovered enough to scream, "I don't care what it's called, it hurts like hell! The moment I get out of here, you are a DEAD MAN, do you hear me, Inuyasha? I'm going to make it so you'll never get me pregnant again!"

"Watch your mouth, woman! Do you want the pup to learn words like that before it's even born?"

"YOU'RE ONE TO TALK, YOU HYPOCRITE! SIT! SIT! SIT!!!"

A soft voice murmured encouragingly from within, "That's it, Kagome-san. We can see the head, now. Just a little more."

"STOP THAAAT!!" Or at least, that's what Inuyasha meant to say. What came out was more along the lines of "GROPH FAAAT!!" Eating dirt sure did deter your ability to talk coherently.

There was deadly silence, broken only by the pained pants coming from inside the house. Inuyasha finally managed to lift his head out of the dust, wondering what was taking Kagome so long to respond.

Finally, she asked, her voice calmly deliberate, "Did you just call me fat, Inuyasha?"

"He's done it now," Sango said to Miroku, sighing. They had both wisely retreated to a position well away from both the house and Inuyasha.

"Now wait a minute, bitch, where'd you get -"

"Did you just call me fat, Inuyasha?"

Shippo hid behind Sango's shoulder, muttering, "Kagome's scary!"

"What - no!" Inuyasha exclaimed.

Kagome took a deep breath.

"I can't believe you would say something like that, Inuyasha! In case you forgot, I'm not fat, I'M FUCKING PREGNANT, YOU BAKA! SIT, SIT, SIIIIIIIIT!!!"

In the aftermath of the newly created Inuyasha-crater the group heard the midwife say cheerfully, "Congratulations, Kagome-san, it's a boy!"