Piakchulover66: …Hi
Rose: She's in a bad mood right now, here's the prologue part two.
Me: …..
Him
Prologue two: Getting Sick
-Line Break-
Rose was laying on her bed thinking. Her left hand was over her head, clutching her Pokégear tightly, ignoring the tears in her eyes. Her right hand gently stroked the fur of her beloved Pokémon, Shadow; her shiny Umbreon with red markings. On her Pokégear you could see a few text messages on it.
Say it
Now
While you still can.
I love you….
Goodnight
Goodnight
That was all you could see on the small screen. She just cried out to the boy she loved that she loved him; not in the friend way anymore, but in the way of love. She smiled bitterly at the thought of coming undone for a boy whose love lies with a girl who he has lost. Both had lost time thinking of the love they will never have, even though Rose's love was for the boy who will never feel the same. She knew he was sorry for causing her such pain and despair and she loved it. That pain, the bitter feelings that made her sick, he was worth it all. As long as she could love him freely, it did not matter. He allowed her to love him and he cared for her as much as he could; trying to not to hurt her, but to save her from all her pain and suffering that she had to deal with every day.
He knew her pain; physical but almost all mental. Sadly he was a big part of it. Rose would have never had said it if it wasn't for the fact that he would forget. She let it out all her pain when he said that. He was sorry that he did that to her; that he hurt her so much, but he felt the same pain. Bitter sweet like love itself.
I love you, was all that went through her mind as it raced for a while. She had wanted to say that for so long, but feared losing him. He left once and she couldn't let him go again. So many letters just for him, so many thoughts trapped on him no matter what time of day, then a simple song she wrote for her feelings for him.
She had to wonder however, if it hurt him like it hurt her; knowing that he caused her pain so much and so often. Did her pain hurt him? Did he care? Would he ever love her back?
No, the answer was no to all.
Never, it would be never.
Rose turned over watching the clock as it got latter and latter. She had school and he wasn't gonna be there. It made her want to stay home too; get sick, do something to not be there when he wasn't gonna be either. School was just loneliness for her; sadness inside and out. Dealing with it without him was hard and tough for her. It's as if it lost all its worth.
After a long amount of time thinking on it she finally decided to sleep on it and leave the worry for another day. She put away all her pain and turned over, letting her ruby eyes shut. She drifted away to the dream world where he haunted her even there.
The next morning life went on. 4am read on her clock as she smacked at her Pokégear around until the noise stopped and she started up her early morning. She walked around clumsily tried to keep her balance as she tried to get everything done. She ended up back on her bed at 4:30 once she had some food. She woke back up at 5:00, growling at herself for running late again. She managed to get to the school at 7, which was an hour later than planned. She sighed at herself and her slowness and took a nap for the remainder of the time.
The bell rang and Rose quickly got to class, trying to deal with her day without him with her. The only thing on her mind was missing him. She got through the day in one piece, but wasted no time when she got home to talk to him. The question was asked if he remembered the late night conversation they had earlier. The answer was no, which made her happy as they started to speak of Halloween and all its fun. Rose said she was gonna be a human version of her little Shadow; while he would be a cartoon character with hair crazier than Rose's. She made sure that she would be able to see it at school. It was a fun idea to her so she just had to see what it would end up like.
The conversation took a turn for the worst as he addressed her problems and that she's over loading him in them. Saying some semi-harsh things that didn't relate because he was helping her stung at her like a bee sting. Her chest hurt and throbbed, feeling bad from over loading him. Then she quickly and rashly saying that she'll stay away and leave him be so he can be better again. Goodnight was her response and she went to bed, feeling like crap; crying herself to sleep for a one sided love all over again.
She was fine at school until she saw him. Then she hid her eyes as tears leaked out from her stupid idea. She isolated herself from the person she loved. It was dumb and caused her to let her friends in finally after hiding her long lasting depression for so long Her thoughts of death were getting worse by the day. They lifted her back up telling her that they'll be there for her, that they loved her, and other thoughtful things. A weak smile got out and she got through the day.
She found herself staring at her phone. Should I? Being the only thought on her mind, and she let it all out to him again. That she didn't want to not talk to him in a really long paragraph.
Its fine
-Sighs in relief- so it's okay that I talk to you?
Yep
She felt better when he said that and they talked a while about nothing really. It was just calm. Then she asked if she could role play kiss him there. He said yes, but refused to kiss back. She sighed and decided not to ask again. Then the night where 'I love you' was said was brought up in a way where it didn't make sense if he remembered or not. Now she was waiting for a reply and hour had gone by, still nothing from the boy. She sighed and dealt with the wait.
After around an hour and 15 minutes, he came back. A sorry was thrown out and she made a quick reply saying she was doing homework. In truth the girl had fallen asleep while waiting and woke up to his reply. The conversation that happened after that left a sour taste in her mouth. It was one of those that ended in sadness, reminding her he can't be there forever and that she needs to help herself. It ended with I'll leave you alone for a while…Then she fell asleep with tears streaming down her face as she slowly got sicker inside and out.
The next day she rolled out of bed, the same insane morning. He was gonna be there today…She found herself at school at 6:00am this time, even though it started at 7:30am. He got there after an hour of wishing and waiting. Like always though, it was like she wasn't there; invisible. Another other terrible day went by. Then more flashing through her mind. Another day of seeing him, wishing to be next to him, wanting to run her hands through his hair. Him wearing a Game Stop bag on his head like a hat. He looked like the little video game nerd he was. His blue guitar shinning in the light whenever he played it, making her wanna get closer.
She knew it was hopeless by Friday when he, yet again, rejected hanging out with her all over again. The idiot was all she could think. He knew. He had to have known that she was fucking in love with him. She was pulled out of her thoughts as two friends dragged her out to have a fun beach day, but her sickness inside seemed to have been getting worse. Her skin started to pale, bags formed under her eyes and her throat got sore that night. A hope to be fine the next day was in her mind and she fell asleep to that.