Two Boxes

For a second time in since I had started, I arrived late to my job. No one in the library seemed to notice my absence. I was glad about that fact. My hands were still shivering from that outburst of indignation. I had managed not to drop anything, even in my best days, that was almost impossible. I began to feel better; until I stumbled upon a cart full books someone had carelessly left on my way. Of course, the pile of books made a ruckus that echoed possibly even in other countries.

I was already on the task of picking them up, when a perky small voice said, "There you are Ileana! There's a message for you in lounge area," I looked up to see Michiko- one of my co-workers with short blonde hair- she looked down and noticed, "Oh my, your stocking ripped. Don't worry. I'll take care of this. Just go pick up your message and fix that up."

Needless to say, I felt like dumb child. As far as I had always seen things, Michiko should have been more accident-prone than me. Maybe, I just had some sort of wicked little imp casting spells on me. That way of thinking always helped me get through the day –just to know I wasn't entirely hopeless.

Defeated, I went to the lounge room after changing my stockings. I always had a few spares anyway. I looked at the memo note. I saw the words without reading them, and panicked. It was sure to be mom. She probably wanted to know how things had gone. How would she react when I told her I had made such an irrational decision?

After taking in three deep breaths and holding on to my chest, I read it. It was good news. My best friend since childhood, Julianna, had just returned from her honey moon. I had saved her many times before; so, surely, it was her turn to save me. I dialed the number on the memo note as fast as I could. I waited impatiently tapping my foot and crumbling the note into a ball.

"Hello?" she finally picked up –after three rings- her voice sounded utterly peaceful.

"Julie, it's me..." that's all I managed to say before my voice broke down into tears. Everything around me had suddenly turned alien. I felt the walls were about to warp around me swallow me.

Despite my sobbing, she knew it was me, "Are you ok, Lea?" I shook my head –as if she could see it- and she continued, "I'm close to your work. Can you meet me at the café across the street?"

I nodded and managed a teary, "Uh huh..."

"Ok, see you there in a few minutes."

"Mhm..."

After her voice disappeared from the phone, I quickly wiped my tears away on my sleeves. I was glad not to be wearing make up, or it would have looked like someone had used my white sleeves to mop the floor. I checked out to go to lunch and took a little trip to the restroom. I didn't look as bad as I had sounded before. Even so, the realization that I might have ruined my life was just dawning on me. It frightened me like no horror story ever could.

'Bonjour a tout le monde' was the café across the street. It was nice, and it had good food. The atmosphere was also pleasant. And yet, I despised going there on my own. I always packed me own lunch from home or just skipped meals. I had nothing against the French food. I loved it as much as I loved the language. It just happened to be one of those places that made me feel extremely suffocated and self-conscious. Still, desperate times call for desperate measures. I took the deepest breath I could and plunged in.

As expected, the entire place was teaming with lovely couples. It seemed odd, but just having an Edward of their own made those women have a light of their own. They looked like perfect couples all around. All smiles. All handsome Edwards had their eyes fixated on their respective women. It was just that time of ambiance that made my head spin and cheeks fill with a red blush. I wanted to run under a table and hide like a roach. I felt out of place.

Just as I was about to run out for a second breath, I saw Julie waving at me. She was sitting by the window. Her smile seemed brilliant. Her wavy dark brown hair had a presence of its own –unlike my ridiculously straight hair. We had almost always had the same interests and people often confused us for sisters, but in the time she was gone, something changed. Her skin was ivory, and well complimented by the light behind her. To make things more interesting, she was wearing designer clothes. She could afford them now that she had a book just published. I walked up to her smiling and trying to ignore how well she looked in that short black dress over her jeans, all put together with a little green jacket. I wasn't jealous. I just wished I could borrow some of her good sense.

As soon as I was close enough, her expression changed into a troubled expression.

"What's wrong?" I asked full of concern.

"I was about to ask you the same." She whispered across the table, "You've been crying. No doubt about that. What happened? Did your manager yell at you again?"

"No, no, none of that," I shook my hands as if trying to dissipate her ideas, "It's nothing related to work."

She grew impatient, "Then what?"

"Well, it's just that I- I..." I was cut off by the waitress.

"What will you have?" she asked.

I was relieved to have a second to gather my thoughts. But Julie turned to her handing her back the menus. "I'll have a cappuccino and a slice of pecan pie. She'll have a hot cocoa and a turkey sandwich."

Her voice was so assertive and cutting. I had to readjust my glasses to take a second look at her. Perhaps my hearing needed an aid too. This just didn't seem like the Julie I had grown up with.

She noticed my perplexed expression and gestured for me to continue.

I looked out of the window at the cars passing by, "So, how did it go on your honeymoon?"

She seemed angry. I thought she might reach over and slap me, but she simply raised an eyebrow and began telling me. It seemed like she was courteous enough –or too shy- to leave out the more intimate details of her honeymoon. However, she seemed to be promoting that I visit Greece at least once in my life. Apparently, it's the place more suited for men of our era.

I inconspicuously looked around and imagined one of the Edwards in the table next to ours standing under the bright sun of Greece next to the ruins. Certainly, it would be befitting to his godly looks. As soon as my cocoa drink arrived and I took a sip of it, I sank even deeper into the blissful illusions brewing in my mind. It didn't last.

Julie snapped her fingers at me. When she had my attention, she demanded that I explain why I was so troubled. I knew she wouldn't buy it if I told her I was just overwhelmed by the joy of her return. After all, it would be good practice for when I broke the news to my mom. Thus, I began my tale of failure to being a normal woman of society and how my rage had gotten the best of me, yet again.

We ate as I spoke. Even though she seemed calm as a lamb at pasture, her eyes were bewildered. When I finished my story, she asked if that was all. When I said, "Yeah, I guess for now..." she hit her forehead with the palm of her hand. She reached over and smacked my forehead too, which I can translate of her calling me an idiot.

"Lea, if anything, I think you..." her words were cut off.

This time it wasn't the waitress. It was a sweet and masculine voice emanating from the presence behind me, "So, here you are!"

I froze and looked over my shoulder, very slowly. I saw nothing but black clothes. Black shoes, black pants, and black long sleeve shirt unbuttoned midway showing a muscular and lean chest. I dared to look up. He had sleek black hair nearly covering his eyes. His softly tanned skin appeared to be made of silk. I would have passed out then; except, he ignored me and leaned over to kiss Julies cheek. His lips pressed against her skin so very softly and slowly. I felt like I was witnessing something forbidden. Then I realized Julie was introducing me.

"Aiden," she gestured toward me graciously, "remember my best friend Ileana?"

He turned to me with little interest, but still smiled, "Yes, how can I forget the famous Lea? Savior of the weak, right?" he offered me his hand.

I sank back into my chair as I shook his soft hand, "Hi... Aiden. How are you?"

He nodded. It seemed like his dark blue eyes mocked my lack of social skills. While he was being attentive toward Julie, I pictured him standing by the Greek temples, and thought of how apt the name Aiden was for a godlike figure such as him.

I stood up and apologized for leaving so suddenly, but it was time to get back to work. It seemed like my presence would hardly be missed so I hurried to the door. Julie caught up with me, "Wait!" she said, "We're not done talking. Don't be shy. Aiden should be like family to you now."

I faked my best phony smile, "It'll work out somehow. Remember how nervous you were before the big day?" and she was, "Got to go to work now. Bye."

"We will talk later, right?" she seemed menacing.

I nodded, still smiling.

As I dodged cars to cross the street –I hate waiting for the light to change and it was too far- I found myself whispering the name of Julie's husband, "Aiden..." It was then, when it hit me. I had absolutely no idea what my future husband's name was!

The end of the day looked gloomy for me, and the sky seemed to accentuate it. On the bus ride, I imagined what it would be like to sleep on a cloud. It was hopeless. Even a daydream broke into a 'daymare' –if such thing exists- as I picture the clouds parting apart to let me fall. I forced myself to cry as soon as I got home. I wasn't sure why I wanted to do so, but I knew my voice would break as soon as I called my mom. At least that one thing I was right about.

The phone rang about three times and she picked up, "Hell?"

"Mom, how are you?"

"I'm fine dear. Is this about your trip to the 'Placement' office?"

My stomach was tied in a knot, but I managed to speak. I told her everything with flawless detail. By end of my rant, I heard her sigh.

"Mom, what should I do now?" I asked almost in tears, hoping she would fetch me out of this mess like she had done after my fights.

She was silent for a moment, but her tone was serious. It sent chills down my spine as she said, "There's no going back, dear. You signed. You were lucky enough to meet him first and choose him. Do you know how rare that is?" I was about to protest when she shut me up with her flattery, "I'm very proud of you. Your father would be proud. And your sister will be proud too. It's a quality I admire most of you. I..."

I interrupted, "Mom, I'm tired now. I'll call you later, ok?"

"OK, have a good night. Remember that I love you."

"Me too, mom."

It wasn't a lie. As soon as the phone was on its base, I somehow made it to my bed and collapsed into a heavy sleep. During that night, I dreamed many things. Messy things that didn't make sense. In that mess, I began to believe that everything had been a dream and nothing more.

A pestering ring broke my deep slumber. It was my second night sleeping so well, but now something was wrong. I slammed my palm on snooze button on my alarm, but the ringing continued. I opened my eyes and in the blur, I saw a red flickering light. My mind woke up with my body as I reached for the phone. Before I could say, "hello?" a cold voice was calling my name.

I immediately pictured the 'dragon' woman, "Miss Rivers, I would like to congratulate you. Your work has been entirely processed and approved."

"Huh?" I mumbled, but in reality I wanted to ask, sure it wasn't a dream of mine?

She continued ignoring my confusion, "All is set for your 'mate' to move in today in the afternoon."

She continued to confirm my address, while I said yes to everything, I thought with disgust how she saw us. Using the word 'mate' as if we were a pair of zoo animals. I was about to argue about it when she stunned me.

"All of the aspects of our contract still stand. However, the board would allow me to pass the contract without adding this to the contract."

"What?"

"It seems you will be able to return him..."

Yes! I thought, finally! Sweet justice! But it was too soon.

"Two new clauses were added. If he commits an infidelity, we will take him back."

My ease faded thinking that someone with those glasses... how could he get someone to date him when this world's crowded with gorgeous men?

"If," I yawned as she spoke, "Please Miss Rivers, pay attention. I won't repeat this."

"I'm sorry, Miss Turmain. It's just that I..."

She ignored me and continued, "If he causes you any bodily harm, we will take him back."

I mimicked her in awe, "Bodily... harm?"

"He should be arriving this afternoon between three and five. Please make sure you take all necessary arrangements. This will be a long term situation. Any questions?" she asked last, as if she would answer them.

I wanted to ask about that last clause, but the mess in my room sent me to my feet, "No that's fine. Thanks."

"Have a good day."

She was gone. And I was still in my messy room fretting to put things in order. Before anything could get done, I had to call and ask for the day off at work. Even thought no one would notice my absence, I wanted to remain honest.

The manager barely listened to me and said it was ok.

House work wasn't my forte. My house was particularly small. My mom bought it with some of the money left from my dad's life insurance. She insisted that someone my age needed privacy and that I needed to be more independent. I hated it at first. But after a light coat of pink in my room, it didn't seem half as bad.

My house wasn't big. I don't know the exact measures, but I know that my room was just big enough for my bed and a small nightstand. The room next to it was a walk-in closet –or so I was told. I turned it into my own small study. An old man in the neighborhood, one of the very few non-Edwardian men I had ever met, had fixed a bookshelf in all the four tiny walls. I had a medium size desk in there. My own personal library was nice, but a bit too dark. My backyard was actually my true sanctuary in sunny days. It had a small orange tree that had tiny blossoms every spring. I loved them, but they would never get to become oranges. I decided it was too young and small for that anyway. The kitchen was small as well, but it got plenty of light from my utterly plain and grassy backyard. The living room had no TV, just a couch and a few cushions of the floor where I thought some chairs would go well.

First on my cleaning list was my bathroom. I had trouble cleaning away the mold because the smell of bleach made me dizzy. And it also worried me having to share that single most private place with a complete stranger, a man who didn't seem fit for me. I picked up my stray underwear making sure to get them all and put them to wash.

The hours passed me, and soon I was starving. After brunch, I realized it was one 'o clock. I dumped my dish in the sink and ran to my most important task of the day. I decided, to my deepest regret, that I would turn my lovely study into a room for... him?

I managed to drag out the desk. I left it in the backyard with a plastic sheet over it. I vacuumed. I dusted. And I set a futon on the floor for him. I had a small night stand with two drawers set next to his bed. The room looked small and it needed a window, but it seemed like habitable place nonetheless. I left my books thinking he wouldn't be there forever.

Since I began working my mind was machinating a way out. It was all set. I'm such a klutz that I would get hurt by accident anyway. If we hated each other, the way out would be blaming him for one of those accidents and he'd be out of my life. I dusted my hands smiling and feeling proud of my clever idea.

The doorbell rang. I fell apart, confidence and all.

I tried to touch up my hair, and ran to the door taking deep breaths. I was shocked when I opened the door and I heard a cute, "Hello."

The melodious voice belonged to the receptionist from the 'Placement' office. I blushed instantly and said, "Hi. Uhm, how can I...?"

"Could you sign this please?"

I took the clipboard and signed my name. I had no chance to ask anything.

He handed me a manila folder packed with papers and said, "He's all yours now. Have a good day, Miss Rivers."

He patted my head almost with pity and his voice was taunting. I couldn't answer.

He turned back toward the street and I heard him asking, "Do you need help?"

A more serious voice replied, "No, this is all of it."

The desk attendant smiled and got into a black car. He opened the back door and got in. I could have sworn I saw the 'dragon' woman's designer heels, but the car was gone before I could even take a better look.

I could see him bending into a dark blue sedan. He was picking something out of the car. Before I could ask, he stood up and turned in my direction. I only saw his perfect hair peeking from behind two large cardboard boxes.

"Let me help you," I called to him.

"No, just lead the way."

His hands had a tough grip on the boxes. He kicked the car-door shut without turning. I didn't dare asked if he could see me and just led the way. I took notice of the boxes. They were cardboard and the letters were faded. He had tied them closed with bits of string. He walked with ease, even if his hands were tense. I also noticed his forearms were very muscular; not exaggerated muscle, but a nice tone.

After he followed me without trouble to his room –even I stumbled twice while he didn't– he set the boxes down without much effort. Surely this wasn't the same gauche nerd that dropped a thousand files and bumped into me before?

I was facing his back while he looked at the books on the walls.

"That's my collection... uh, you can read them if you want. And of course, this is your room. Mine's just next to here on your right..." I explained quietly.

I gazed at his perfect figure. He was tall with wide shoulders, just perfect for his slim figure. He was still wearing what seemed to be his work uniform. So neat and tidy, it was almost too boring. Except, his hair was still perfect, still enticing. I stood by the door waiting for his reply. He finally turned very slowly flashing the lines of his hair and his perfectly lined jaw. I noticed his lips first. And then, my jaw dropped open.

Somehow, in the midst of everything, he had ditched his ridiculous glasses for a more decent pair. I could see his dark eyes through the delicate lenses. His expression, however, was tense almost infuriated. His fists were tightly clenched as he took a step forward, "If this is my room, then you won't mind if I close the door while I set up my stuff."

I barely managed to take a step back before he shut the door at my face. Regardless of how good he looked now, he had no right to be rude to me in own my own house. Irate, I knocked on the door.

"Yes?" he asked impatiently.

Something in his voice sounded almost melodic, and it changed my words, "Uh, I... I'll be making dinner now. It should be done in about forty minutes."

He kept silent for a mine, "No," he finally said, "Not hungry for tonight..."

I backed away into the tiny hallway. I waited. And nothing happened. I heard no sounds, and he didn't take a step outside. Was that it? His luggage? His life packaged in two crummy cardboard boxes? No duffel bags, no briefcases, no nothing. Perhaps, everything was in his car. Maybe he would run away from me, or maybe... his anger would lead to him hurting me.

Time passed me as I pondered all that and by the time I got to the kitchen, it was already dark outside. It looked like it would rain. In my fret to get everything right I missed this. I had always been afraid of lightning storms. So much so that I checked the weather forecast everyday. Whenever there was the slightest chance of a storm, I spent the night at my mother's place. This marked the beginning of my new life. I could no longer run away.

Despite my fears, I managed to cook my quickest specialty, basil and tomato quesadillas. I hoped the scent of the herbs would lure him out, so I made three extras for him. Nothing. Rain began pouring, but somehow I felt a strange sense of peace.

It didn't last. The roaring thunder shook me awake and the lightning shot my eyes into complete alertness. Even when I had felt at peace, I couldn't sleep knowing he was next to me separated by a thin wall and a few old books. I hoped my mom would call, but she probably thought she would interrupt something. I was terrified, but what to do?

My only consolations in unexpected nights like this were my books, and now that was off limits. Then it hit me. On top of my own –much larger- night stand, was the report they had left for me. Surely, the monotonous lawyer-like language in which it was written would send me to sleep.

I eagerly opened the first folder. My application was the first page. I brought bitter memories and lost hopes, so I flipped to the next page. It was finally there, his information. I was stunned. A small picture of him without glasses almost had me drooling. It was unbelievable. He had nothing to envy from any of the other Edwards, probably almost as good looking as the godly Aiden.

When my sight was finally able to draw away from his amazingly beautiful face, I turned to his name. Allan. His name was Allan. The sight of him as an angel fluttered briefly in my mind. Without intent, I had made myself blush. At least, no one was there to see. My eyes continued down on that intriguing second page. It was intriguing, indeed.

Although the form was the same as mine, none of his preferences in his mate of choice were filled. Not only that, but a big clump of whiteout covered the line of his age and the number 20 was doodled over it. I tried to see in the light, but to no avail. My mind made a quick connection, what if he had been sent to live with someone at a younger age? After all, the youngest Edwards that a woman could get were 17 years old. It was feasible. Maybe that was the reason he had been considered a failure... but it was too soon to infer anything.

Looking further down, I noticed instead of his signature was a bar-code printed on the space. A specimen. The 'dragon' woman's words resounded in my mind. To her, he was nothing more than an object compared to a grocery item. My heart trembled; a deep sorrow began crawl into my soul. I tried to ignore it by reading the rest of the report. It was all the clauses she had talked about, but in greater and more complex detail. I skimmed through and eventually, I began to feel drowsy. I found the last page was blank. Except for the line at the very top. It said:

'CODE: XR2-000112 : P2 REJECT'

I was unable to grasp the meaning of that, but it troubled me enough to scare away my drowsiness.

Suddenly, the cold in the house became unbearable. I threw a blanket over my shoulders and walked to the small hallway outside. The loud start of the furnace startled me. Most houses had quiet furnaces, but not mine. By reflex, I turned to the door at the end of the hallway where he slept. The door was now slightly open.

The sentiment I had felt earlier rushed to my heart again. Perhaps, the reason he seemed angry was the way he had always been treated, like a defective object. I didn't notice my feet had taken involuntary steps toward his door. A soft push allowed me entrance. I stepped in so very quietly.

The light that entered through the small opening from the hallway lit his hair. He was facing the wall. I could see his bare upper shoulders. It made sense for a guy to take off his shirt for sleeping, right?

An alluring scent –similar to a forest after a spring rain- emanated from his body. It enticed me, hypnotized me. Next thing I knew, I was on my knees. My fingers quivered as I slowly reached toward his hair. A shadow flashed before me. In fright I shut my eyes. When I opened them, I realized a heavy pressure over my shoulders. I was no longer sitting. I was pinned to the floor. He was hovering over me. A rush of fear paralyzed me.

"I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..." I began to say.

A low grunt interrupted me, "Hmp, so what they said about you is true."

"W- what do you mean?"

He leagued and his voice sounded serious almost bitter, "You're just a needy girl. You'd do anything with anyone. You have no standards. All you wanted was..."

"That's not true!" I yelled. I tried to move, but his hold was impressive.

"Shut up!" he snarled. His face was dangerously closer to mine now. I could smell his breath filled of that sweet aroma. He whispered sounding angry, "Now that I'm here, and we're alone... you don't need to pretend. You don't need to conceal those desires..."

As his lips were over mine, I shut my eyes. My heart was beating faster and faster. I gripped the futon beneath me. If I screamed, no one would hear me. If I cried, I might choke on my own tears. All I could do was tremble underneath his body hidden in the shadows...