The White sheep of a Black family. Chapter 1.
In the late night after Halloween, or in the early morning next day, Sirius Black killed thirteen people. Twelve of them were muggles. One was Sirius friend, Peter Pettigrew.
Sirius was brought to Azkaban. He deserved to be there. Reggie and I wanted him to be there, if only for what he put me through. At school I was bullied. I never was before, but now my schoolmates had learned the true meaning of the name Black. I didn't protest, I didn't tell them they were wrong, for they were right. Blacks were bad. I was a Black, therefore I was bad.
The school tried to help me. One professor, professor Dumbledore, particularly. He offered me support and listened to me. He gave me help. I received help from Reggie, too. "Beta, you must remember, we are not Sirius, we can make it all right. We can." For the first time since he lived in my house, I was on the receiving end of the help. Things changed. We changed. Regulus came out of his depression and I fell into one.
It took me weeks to recover and I still curse myself for being that weak. Reggie keeps saying that I should be proud. It took him longer than me, he says. I say he's a fool.
All events changed me for good. The young rebelling girl is gone. I do not love everyone who crosses my path anymore. Only Reggie holds my heart, Reggie and little Josh. My love for Sirius is gone, too. It's replaced with a bitter anger, fueled on a feeling of pain and betrayal. I don't cry anymore. When things get tough I get angry, not sad. I use my temper to hurt deliberately. I'm not a little girl who's protected, anymore. I'm the one who protects now. I protect Reggie and his kid. I take care of them like a man. Ironic. My parents said I was not worthy, cause I was a girl. Now I took the place of the man. Probably because of them.
Reggie changed, too. He's become a womanizer. That's why he has a child and no wife. One day there was a girl at our door. "Hey darling," she said, looking at me with hatred. (She probably thought I was one of Reggies girls…) "Give this to Reg, will you? It's his. He left it with me. Name is Josh. Bye." The girl ran and I was too shocked to go after her. Josh is a good three years old now and a dear as I've ever seen one. Reggie says I spoil him. But I really don't. I think.
Truth to be told, Josh reminds me of Harry. I take good care of him, to make up for what Harry has to go through. Reggie says it's wrong. (I never listen to him, anyway.) Josh misses me when I'm at work, a lot, like I missed father when he was away. (Never mind that I missed father mostly because mother wouldn't hit me when he was around.) I try to make up for being away so much by giving him as much attention as I can. Reggie says it's wrong. (But he knows I won't listen to him, anyway.)
Josh calls me mum.
Reggie and I have always been happy that Sirius was in jail. We were happy he couldn't harm our Josh. Now, Sirius has broken out of jail.
The Prophet had a headline that read "Notorious murderer Sirius Black escapes jail" on the front page, yesterday. I didn't even see it, when I threw it on the table, while making breakfast. No, it was Reggie who found out and yelled for me to come and see. We made quite a consternation. I think we scared Josh.
I wanted to stay home, to protect both Reggie and Josh, but Reg convinced me to go. He was right when he told me it would be useful to hear what information the aurors had on Sirius. In the briefing I didn't learn much. They didn't know what happened, how it could have happened or how to find my brother. So, every Auror and even the trainee's were set on looking for Sirius. Every Auror except me. Shacklebolt explained to me, that even though he knew I was on bad terms with Sirius, I wasn't allowed to search for him. It was the procedure, he said. I wished to believe him, but I knew Shacklebolt hated me, so I didn't.
While everybody was searching for Sirius, I was doing paperwork. It was killing me. I wanted that bastard found and I wanted to be with my family to protect them if necessary. I had no doubt that Sirius would turn against us. He was a pureblood fanatic and we were blood traitors. I feared especially for Josh. He was a half-blood, son of a blood traitor and a disgrace to the Black-name in Sirius eyes. I wanted to be anywhere, but at the office doing bloody paperwork.
I didn't become an Auror to do paperwork, did I? No, I became an Auror to prove myself and the world that I was not Sirius Black and that I was a good guy, or a good girl, to be more precise. And now I was locked up, doing nothing.
I hated Shacklebolt for it. And that was one of the reasons that, when I thought up the explanation for this all, I didn't go and tell him. It was also one of the reasons why I took the day off today, even if it means missing the morning briefing on Sirius. It doesn't matter anyway, because I already know. They haven't found Sirius, they can't have found Sirius. Because I'm certain no one is going to look for a black dog when they're searching a notorious murderer. No one but Reggie, Josh and me that is. 'Cause I'm going to find that bastard and they're coming with me. I hate to drag them into danger, but I can't allow them to stay home unprotected. Even if Reggie claims they'll be fine.
So, now Josh is chattering away happily, looking at his pink rain boots every three seconds. "Where we going, mummy?" Regulus doesn't even flash me annoyed look. (He has been flashing me those looks ever since he realized that Josh is going to call me 'mummy' no matter what. He has tried to teach him to say 'Aunt', but quitted after a half year of frustration. This frustration was mostly because Josh called everybody aunt, everybody but me. Even Reggie himself got called 'aunt' on a few occasions.)
Regulus is worried. I understand, I'm a bit worried myself. Scrap that. I'm really worried. What if things go wrong? What if Sirius has gotten his hands on a wand and tries to use it against our Josh? What if he gets scared and hurts Josh? What if something happens to Regulus? I would never forgive myself, but this has to be done. It's to protect Regulus and Josh, I remind myself. I won't let that bastard hurt them. I won't.
What worries me as well, is the presence of Aurors at the coast. What if one recognizes Regulus? But, no. No, they won't. It's been fourteen years. Reggie was just eighteen when he disappeared. He is thirty-two, now. He's grown quite a bit, he's gotten a little bit fat, actually. His face has changed, too. When we were young, he never wore muggle clothing, now he's in a suit. I shouldn't worry.
If anything, I should be worried about me. If an Auror sees me, on the beach with a friend and child, on a day I called sick…. Well, I'd probably be doing paperwork until Christmas next year. Aurors do tattle. And Shacklebolt hates me. As my mentor he's still the one to punish me.
I hate this system. I'm not that young. It's not fair that I should still have a mentor at the age of thirty. It's just my rotten luck that I got that Shacklebolt-guy as a mentor. He's the one who's been refusing to give me an 'adult Auror status'. Of course, that's not what it's truly called, but I doubt there's anyone alive who still knows the old term. Anyway, Shacklebolt won't give it to me. Says I'm not prepared yet. That I still can't control my anger enough. That I will be a danger to the society if he allows me to run free. That every time he considers to give it to me, I get to ruin it. That beating up one of the suspects does not help.
Shacklebolt was in the Order of Phoenix. Sirius betrayed him just as hard as he betrayed Lily and James. I feel sorry for him. He might even be right. I did beat up three suspects. But, I swear, he still goes harder on me than on his other pupils.
Besides, I haven't beaten up someone in the last three years.
Okay, that's excluding two exes of mine.
And the father of one of Reggies girls. (He started it! He shouldn't have touched my little brother!)
But besides them, I didn't touch any one, least of all my suspects.
But, Shacklebolt still hates me. If he hears that I was on the beach instead of in my bed, today, I'm screwed. So, better not run into any Aurors.
Reggie looks strange in his suit. I've never see him in anything, but free-time-clothing. Especially when it's this hot. Reggie doesn't work. He does the household and finds 'chickies' to make out with. For neither of those occasions do you have to wear a suit. He doesn't even own one. I had to enlarge one of my own suits. Why did he insist on wearing one today? I think it's got something to do with Sirius. Reggie knows that Sirius hates suits. Maybe that's why he wants to wear one today. Even if it's bloody hot.
Reggie takes up Josh. "We're going to the beach, little one." Josh is looking at Reggies chest, so he doesn't even try to look like he isn't scared. I sigh. "Time to go, babe." Josh allows me to place a little kiss on his cheek. Reggie and I nod silently and disapparate.
We've been disapparating with Josh on our arms ever since he was little. He's used to the feeling and shows no signs of illness. That's a good thing, because most kids throw up after apparating.
Okay, this was stupid. How in hell did I expect to find a black mutt on the beach? Or anywhere near the beach? Do you know how big the beach is? And Sirius has got two days of head start now. We are never going to find him.
No, I am going to find him. I am. I want to find him, so I will. Has there ever been anything I wanted to do, that I wasn't capable of doing in the end? Ever? No, I didn't think so either. So I will find him. I just have to figure out how.
Okay, just imagine: I'm an escaped convict. No, no, I'm starting all wrong! I'm not just an escaped convict. I'm Sirius. I'm a dare devil. I always find ways to do the unexpected. So I have to expect the unexpected. Wasn't there once a wise man who said that?
Anyway, I'm Sirius. I've just escaped Azkaban. I swam over the sea. I'm tired. I have the body of a dog. What will I do? Rest? No, I'm Sirius!! Sirius never rests.
Okay, so I won't rest. But I'm still tired and hungry. I need energy. Where am I going? I'm going to find food, that's what. Food first. It's always food first with Sirius.
Sirius lives on canine instincts. So he's eaten by now. What is he doing? Traveling. Traveling an awful lot. Sirius couldn't stay on the same spot, even if he wanted to, even if it was just for two minutes. So, Sirius is traveling.
But, where to? Does he have a goal? Does Sirius ever have a goal? It seems like he always did things at random to me.
How does he know where to go to anyway? Do dogs have this big inner compass, or something like that?
Would a big black mutt go unnoticed? Perhaps we should go around and hand out flyers, saying that we lost our dog…..
Why don't we…. Well, talking about coincidence! "Reggie…"
"What?!" Regulus talks way too loud for my liking.
"Reggie, ssht. Behind you." Regulus turns.
"Let us all be damned!"
I curse.
"Reggie!! What about my 'shht'? Get him now, before he's gone!"
And Reggie dives. The big black dog yelps in pain. Josh squels in delight. I grab all three of them and we dissapparate.