"Okay class, Larry and I decided to take turns in teaching you educational things, that way we can set good examples and replace Barney one day. Since today's the first day of school after a very, very long mid-term break, we decided to teach the whole lot of you together so that we can teach everyone about the wonders of togetherness!" Maya shouted through a sheet of paper rolled into a cone to make the paper look like a megaphone. The school had just banned the use of megaphones because of a certain incident where Maya and Larry had abused their powers as teachers to 'borrow' megaphones from the school and use them to prank everyone at McDonalds and force them into slavery.

Let's just say that they kind of made a cleaner nation with their evil plan and then were stopped by the evil villains that are the police for attempting to enslave the whole nation.

Now, on posters all over the class, were the words 'DO NOT TRUST MEN IN BLUE UNIFORM WITH THE WORDS "POLICE" WRITTEN AT THE BACK'.

Larry smiled his usual goofy smile. "Don't forget to pack all things necessary for our field trip to the stables! For example, all the trash you want to feed the horses with to save money on carrots and to save the Earth since littering is against the law and since we blew up all the trash bins to get rid of all the trash yesterday."

One of the students raised its hand. "Mr. Larry, wouldn't we be hurting the poor horses of we do that?"

"Yes we would, but our goal right now is to save earth, not animals but now that you mention it, it kinda counts as animal cruelty… I'll tell you what: we'll go to the detention centre down the street next week and feed it to the people who committed all those illegal things, with the permission of the head security, of course.

The children cheered and took notes on horses and what they needed to bring and what they should be prepared for.

"Is everyone present and still has their head intact with their bodies?" Maya asked, glaring at Larry. To save cost on paying a bus driver, they got the only person who had a driver's license to drive them to a horse ranch because the stables were further away from where they set off from (which was a deep dark alley under Oldbag's basement) and they needed to decrease the number of victims or else they would be revoked of their teacher duties and jobs.

Larry shrunk by 30cm in fear.

All the students nodded; proof that they still have heads on their bodies and that Larry didn't kill them.

"Okay then, it seems we've arrived a bit late so while waiting for Larry to go find someone to break the lock—I mean find someone to let us in, let's review what we learned to do when we see them," Maya shouted into her fake megaphone.

The students conveniently lined up by height but Maya wasn't satisfied with that so she rearranged them by the number of letters there are in their names.

But that didn't work either because some of the student's names were unpronounceable and unspellable. (If that is a word)

"I give up. Just pretend to be cats suffering from electrocution and recite what we learned yesterday."

The students did as they were told.

"One: Never stand behind horses or else they could and would kick you or sucker punch you but it would be more normal and convenient for horses to kick you and it would hurt more too.

"Two: Never stand in front of horses because they might be camels in disguise and spit on you, or they really are horses and decided to spit on you because they think you're weird and ugly. (1)

"Three: In case of emergency, do not stand beside horses just in case someone decides to shoot the horse and the poor dead horse would collapse on you and its ghost would haunt you forever.

"Four: Do not steal the horses carrots because we will never know if the horses are also spirit mediums and spirit mediums are very, very important people (VVIPs) and we should treat them with the utmost respect, if not, we face the printer.

"Five: Never talk about horse-shoe crabs being related to horses. It would hurt the horses' feelings and probably ruin their self-esteem somehow."

Larry ran as fast as he could to Maya and co.

"The gate's open~"

Everyone cheered and stampeded towards the horses.

Maya explained the history of all the horses there and made sure everyone kept a safe five-feet radius away from the horses.

The children noticed a short sweet note for them stamped onto the horses' backs.

To everyone and everything staring at my butt now reading this:

Please don't be jealous of me for having a shiny butt and special attention from the nasty annoying flies that shower me with their attention. And to you flies, who are reading this too, I do love your attention but it's embarrassing me and I'm a nice and decent horse who loves galloping around to feel the wind in my ears so if you please, I suggest the whole lot of you fly faster and try to keep up with me whenever I run. You people love my shiny back, don't you?

Signed,

Horse with Shiny Back

The students stared at one another. That was weird.

Proceeding along, Maya noticed that there weren't enough horses for everyone to ride together.

To solve this problem, Maya came up with an ingenious idea.

"Ms. Maya, the horse-cloning thingy didn't work, but we did end up with over-sized koalas. They're so cute and fluffy! I want to hug them and teach them to swim!" (2)

Maya glared at her student. "You will do nothing of the sort. See all these koalas present in the field that are too lazy to run around and feel wind in their ears? We just solved the problem to the endangering of koalas! Now that that's over with, I want all of you to write a twelve page report on horses and koalas. Make sure you include the little incident we had with our Math notes."

The children groaned but made a mental note to themselves to start on them as soon as they get home.

"Alright kids, our very short field trip is over, so let's climb Old McDonald and the McDonalds mascot to Mr. Edgeworth's office and beg him for dinner."

They all got piggy-back rides from Old McDonald, the McDonald's mascot and evil fat strangers. They helped the said people lose ten kilos that day.

The principal stalked off towards Maya and Larry's classroom. He needed to make sure that each of them learnt something that day.

"Students, before you go home, tell me what you've learnt from your impromptu outing," he asked.

"We learnt that horses are beautiful creatures and that koalas were endangered animals probably due to their laziness. We also learnt that we should never give koalas coffee or else they would pretend to be Napoleon and then start World War III. To stop them, we had to kill them all so now koalas are endangered again," a little girl, who was sure of her gender now after checking it on her birth certificate several times, said.

The principal sighed and shook his head. He never has and never will understand children and their over-imaginative powers.

A/R: Yeah, seems rushed, doesn't it? I've been putting writing this off for about a month now.. Hehhehe… Yes, I know that quality is better than quantity but I needed to get Business Studies and Economics out of my mind and worrying about the teacher too. Good news: I got promoted to the next grade but I hate my new class. Especially the classroom. One would wonder how we aren't suffering from hypothermia from staying in the class. Meh, it's not as cold as Antarctica or Greenland or whatever, but still. Jasmine! Where have you been for the last two months?

Heheheh.. Let's just say I was pretty busy and the next update should hopefully be in 2 weeks. Yes, 2 weeks is LONG, but I have other things to worry about here, so yeah. Sorry about that. Though I'm sure no one reads my insanely long rants anymore after the first chapter of this fic. Ah well.

The spitting thing DOES happen. Though, the reason, not so much.

Translation: I can't wait to hug you (strangling) and teach you to swim (bathing *cough* drowning *cough*)

PLEASE REVIEW!