The next morning I awake in a lonely bed, no nick, and more importantly, more devastatingly, no him. The thought takes me by surprise. Why would I want him in my bed when I can have Nick? Sweet Nick, Nick who cares for me and wants only me.

I lie there for a moment, thinking about the day ahead; the meetings planned at work; the predictable arguments between the factory girls; and the even more predictable night with Nick. Nick and I had fallen into a comfortable life together, but one that could be almost scripted. We did the same thing, day after day, night after night. He would try and pop into work at dinner time to see how I was, I'd finish work and head back to the flat and wait for him to join me once he had finished at the bistro. He'd come home, we would eat - normally some health kick style meal that Nick wanted to try - we would watch TV and head to bed. Undress ourselves, and climb into our respective side of the bed, a quick cuddle and then sleep. Although, of course, some nights we had sex but again, it was somewhat monotonous. I'm not saying Nick was bad in bed, in fact at first I was pleasantly surprised, but very rarely did he mix it up, I never quivered in anticipation like I did with Peter.

'God damn it' I scolded myself after realising I was thinking about him again. 'Right that's enough of that' I firmly say out loud as I climb out of bed and head for breakfast.

Walking into the kitchen I notice Nick is already dressed and ready for the day. I roll my eyes thinking how unsurprising it is that he's wearing another suit, somewhat a staple of nicks wardrobe. My thoughts are interrupted as nick turns to face me and hands me my breakfast, and with a cheery 'good morning' kisses my head. I smile back at him and look down to what is now sat in front of me. A glass of water, and some healthy cereal that could have quite possibly been swept out of a rabbit cage. I know I should be grateful, and deep down I am for I know he's just looking after me but I can't help but let my thoughts flicker to how Peter wouldn't make me eat this. Of course, he too would look after me, making sure I ate but he knew that a coffee and bacon roll is much more my style.

Nick sits with me as I eat as much of the cereal as I can face and I can't help but feel guilty over my thoughts since my shock awakening in the night. I can hear Nick talking to me but his words aren't actually registering, not that he seems to notice as a nod of the head and a simple 'yeah' every now and then hides my disinterest. Finally, after what feels like hours, Nick rises from the stool at 8am, kisses my head and heads towards the door. I glance at the clock and can't help but roll my eyes as it is the exact same time as he leaves for work every other day.

'See you later Carla' he calls.

'Bye Nick'

And with that he's gone, the door closing behind him. A breathe out a sigh of relief and feel my shoulders relax. Why is Nick rubbing me up the wrong way today I think as I head towards the bathroom, ridding myself of my vest and shorts as soon as I enter. Within seconds of turning the shower on the room is full of hot air, a mist clouds the room as the sounds of the water drums down. I step forward, allowing the heat of the water to capture me. The water running over my shoulders, down my breasts and off the ends of my nipples. I reach for the shower gel, squirting it onto my pouf and working it into a lather before massaging it into my body. My hands glide across my skin as I circle my breasts, and then lower onto my tummy. As my hand ventures further down my mind is suddenly awoken with flashbacks of my dream. Of the way his hands had roamed my body. How he had left wet kisses down my chest as he ferociously headed for the spot we both craved. How his tongue had ran across my hips, across my pubic bone. My breath became laboured at the thought of what happened next. I could allow my hands to do the work for me, after all I am a grown woman, a woman who has never been ashamed of her sexual need but I was under no illusion that today, at this moment, I'd be left far from satisfied at my own touch.

I finished my shower in a hurry, a pout spread across my face and headed to the bedroom where I sat and applied my makeup and dried and styled my hair into soft waves. The white towel was still hugging my body as I walked towards the wardrobe to choose my outfit. I stood, inspecting the expensive items dangling before me, being sure to choose the perfect outfit. After all, Peter appeared in my dream last night, and if he was to appear again tonight, I had to look my best. I laughed out loud at the thought; I was seriously choosing clothes in case my ex-husband appeared in my dreams. Peter would never see this outfit, he was miles away, and if, through some kind of miracle, he did happen to appear in my unconscious thoughts later that night, I was sure there wouldn't be any need for clothes, for either of us. Shaking my head I chose a pair of black skinny jeans, a white blouse and a pair of killer black heals before grabbing my handbag and car keys and heading for the factory.

The day dragged slowly by, this morning's meeting had gone well - securing a contract that would keep us going for the foreseeable. As expected, pointless bickering from the factory lot had pushed me to the end of my tether. Nick had, as predicted, called by at lunch time, and I had guiltily never been less enthusiastic to see anyone before in my life. Why was I suddenly so uninterested? Why was the man before me not filling me with butterflies purely from his look? Why didn't I want to drag him home that instant and take him to bed. Deep down, and much to my disgust, I was completely aware of why - he just wasn't Peter.

'Want anything from the cake run Mrs Connor?' Sean interrupted my thoughts

'No thanks Seany, have you lot finished that order yet?'

'Bloody hell, give us a chance!' Beth screeched from behind him.

'That order is due today, get to work!' I screamed. I knew I was overreacting slightly, they had worked hard all morning but I just wasn't in the mood today.

Slamming the door I collapsed back into the chair, and rested my head on the desk. I needed to pull myself together; I couldn't spend every minute of the day flustered by my own thoughts. I needed to forget about last night; after all I was never going to see this man again.

'Fuck' I whispered. The words stuck in my throat. My chest was constricting at the thought of never seeing Peter again. Before I could comprehend what was happening I'd grabbed my bag and keys and was heading for the car. It was as if my legs were carrying me of their own accord.

'Where are you off to?!' Michelle appeared, stepping out from the cabin. She began to make her way over, no doubt for a catch up but as much as I love Michelle, she is not who I want right now.

'Business meeting, can't stay and chat' I call before clambering into the car.

Setting up the Satnav I realised how insane this was, but still, I couldn't stop myself from typing in the word I knew would open Pandora's Box.

Portsmouth.