Title: When I can't be perfect

Author: GloriousNymph

Warning: There will be no boyxboy (sorry :( ), The story is AU and OOC. Let's say Harry already killed the dark lord in his third year or something, and everyone has recovered from it and so on. There will be bashing towards a lot.

Disclaimer: The characters, except for a few, belong to J.K Rowling.

The first week was nearing it's end, and it felt like summer break had never been. I stared out the window during one of the classes, didn't really know which and didn't care.

The fact that the break was feeling more and more like a distant memory saddened me. Only a week ago had I been with my friends and family, enjoying life to the fullest. Being back to school, hating it and being disliked by my house because of it made me feel empty.

"..ensen, miss Jensen!"

I moved my head away from the window in, slowly.

"Miss Jensen, why aren't you paying attention, don't you care about your studies??"

I snickered. My teacher, whom I forgotten the name of because I didn't give shit about it, looked about to explode, probably from anger.

"No, not at all whatever your name is. Besides, this class is really boring"

This made him explode, resolving in Hufflepuff losing a lot of points, me getting a lot of angry glares from my fellow house mates and me being kicked out from class. When I reached the door, with everyone's eyes on my back, I raised my hand and gave them all my favourite finger, not looking back once. Never had I behaved like that in school, but I guess I couldn't hold it in any more. It felt good to finally let it all out.

Actually, it didn't. Nothing could really make me feel better, except for maybe the lake. So I decided it was a place worth going to in my time of being pissed off.

–

Ron and his fellow schoolmates stared at the door as it closed. Then they turned their heads towards their teacher. His head was beginning to turn purple, and Ron could swear he saw smoke coming out from his ears.

He turned to look at Harry and Hermione. Both being as puzzled as him in this matter. Hermione seeming more angry about it. And he knew it was because class had been disrupted. `Wait! That's the girl who kicked me in the leg!` Something he hadn't noticed before, since he had been too surprised.

The class got dismissed earlier. Their professor, who was being extremely pissed, was going to talk to the head of Hufflepuff, professor Sprout, about Victoria's behaviour.

"You go ahead, I'm going to do something first" Ron told his two friends, and watched as they walked away.

He then turned to the Hufflepuff's who were heading the opposite direction. As he was about to stop one of them it suddenly hit him, he didn't know their names. `No this can't be right.` But as he thought about it harder, he realised that yes, he was clueless to who these people were.

`I know all the names of the students in Slytherin, even though I don't want to, especially with that git Malfoy in it. I don't care if he was on our side during the war and all that, he's still a mean, ego... back on topic Ron! Anyway, all the Slytherins, all the Gryffindors, all the Ravencla...` He realized he didn't know almost anyone from Ravenclaw either. This was something that upset and worried him a lot.

"Erm... Ron? Are you al right?"

Ron looked at the girl shocked. He had been too lost in thought to notice anything or anyone. He saw that it was Hannah Abbott. `...bloody, that's right! Hannah goes to Hufflepuff.` Being relieved that he at least knew one person in Hufflepuff he let out a deep sigh. But he still felt guilt. He saw that Hannah was staring at him and he remembered why he had asked his two best friends two go on ahead.

"Hannah! I'm so glad I got a hold of you, or.. eh.. maybe it's the other way around.. Anyway, who was that girl before?"

"She's Victoria" she spat out, anger in her voice.

Ron frowned, he could understand why she was mad at the girl for what happened at class, but it sounded that she had been feeling bitter towards this Victoria for quite some time.

"So, eh.. can you tell me more about her? She doesn't seem like the usual Hufflepuff..."

"...haaaaah.... al right. Well, she's lived in Norway but was born in Vietnam, from what she told us. And she's a muggle-born. Oh yeah! She totally hates Hufflepuff and Hogwarts. That enough for you?" Not caring for an answer she turned and walked away, the same direction as the others from her house.

Ron stood there frozen. In his head there was only one thing from what Hannah Abbott had said that replayed itself over and over again. `She hates Hogwarts...` To him it was impossible that someone that wasn't from Slytherin could hate the school he and his friends held so dear.

–

I decided not to go to the lake. Today was a sunny day, and sunny days attracted a lot of disliked students, disliked students being almost everyone in school. So I decided to go to this room I found last year. It just popped up when I was walking at the seventh floor.

The first time I had opened the door I had been overwhelmed. The room had been, and still was, a copy of my room. The room I rarely got to see. I had begun to cry, and it had felt refreshing. Ever since that day the room had become my sanctuary. I had stopped coming to cry, instead I came just to be. It made me feel so free.

Something the room was lacking was technology. Something the school seemed to lack as well. To not being able to contact your friends or your family in the simplest ways really got to you. It is so easy to just pick up your phone and then you'll be hearing their voices.

Or to send a simple email or chat. During the years I had drifted further and further away from my friends and my family. It was all thanks to this stupid school. I really hated it, and everyone in it. Everything was so false.

As I lay on the bed, my bed, thinking, I felt something hard under the covers. It was my diary. `Well, this was long ago` I opened it and began reading a few of the things I had written, jumping a lot.

xx xx

This is school is fake! FAKE FAKE FAKE!! I hate it so much!

Why is it that the houses seem to not be interacting with each other? Why is it that the houses are prejudice against each other? I mean, everyone thinks that because Ravenclaw are passionate about studying they are snobbish, boring, nerds. Or that everyone in the stupid Gryffindor house are courageous. "Gryffindor - Where dwell the brave at heart, Their daring, nerve, and chivalry, Set Gryffindors apart." Such load of bullshit. Those in Gryffindor think to highly of themselves, I really dislike them. Or Slytherin, what's with the "Slytherins are evil bastards, death eaters, think only about themselves." I really hate being in this stupid house. Of all houses I was placed in the one with the ugly colours, and everyone thinks we are stupid as well.

Why can't I go to a normal school? With my friends. Why did it have to be Hogwarts?

–

xx xx

The golden trio and Dumbledore sicken me, especially Dumbledore. It's obvious that he favours Gryffindor, so bloody fucking obvious! And Potter is just sad, doing everything Dumbledore asks of him. If he would ask him to kiss his as, I'm 100% he would, disgusting. And what the hell is Granger doing in Gryffindor? She doesn't seem brave at all, why isn't she in Ravenclaw? And that Weasley, oh god! Talk about pathetic! Follows potter like a puppy. All the teachers favours them, except for professor Snape. He's the only teacher who's name is worth remembering and who's worth my respect.

I decided to jump the hate everything things I had written. Nowadays I couldn't hate, or I tried not to hate, instead I disliked. My philosophy was that before judging someone try living in their shoes, which was very hard, since I disliked a lot of people. Thinking of this, I decided to jump to where I had for the first time I had really spoken to Draco.

TBC

Well that was the second chapter, please excuse me if my writing wasn't the best, english isn't my first language. Feel free to review about anything in the chapter that you liked/disliked or found confusing. But if you nag about something I have warned about, then you know what? I won't care.