I've mostly hesitated writing more of this story because while it is easy for me to decide where in Regina's timeline we are, River's timeline is another story. I'm still not sure where Angels in Manhattan fits in with the rest of her timeline and when she gets released from Stormcage, so as I go I will probably be semi-vague on how far along River is. We'll see how it goes. Sorry for the wait! Also, Time Queen is a pretty superb name for this pairing. I LIKE IT.
Major spoilers for both shows to date.
P.S. River's "borrowed words" are Chuck Palahniuk's.
It was months before River heard from the stranger from Storybrooke again. She'd been out for her birthday, with the doctor, enjoying the crisp winter air in London in the late 19th century, dressed for the town.
When returning to her cell, she'd been accosted by Rory – her father – seeking her help to, unbeknownst to him, save herself.
"I can't, not yet anyway," she'd told him, watching the confusion settle into his features. He was angry with her. But she couldn't go with him. Another version of her would find them, she knew. But her heart sank as he left her behind to lock herself back in her cage.
But before she'd even had a chance to remove her hat, she spotted something lying on her cot: an envelope with her name on the front in thick red script. Her brow furrowed. Is one of the guards leaving messages for me now? How quaint. She smirked to herself and picked the envelope up in her hands. Of course she knew better than that. The writing was of a woman's delicate hand and she had an idea of precisely who that woman was.
She tossed her hat to the side and lay down in her cot to open the unexpected mail.
The letter was many pages long and was written in the same red ink.
River,
I came to see you, but you were out. Do your captors regularly release their prisoners for evening excursions? How progressive of them.
I have to admit I was dropping by rather selfishly – I've sent my son to his grandfather for a while. I'm not sure I'll ever have him back. I suppose I was a little lonely.
River traced her finger over a spot on the page that had dried. It was no doubt the mark of a tear. River's heart sank as she continued to read.
I hope you are well and that this letter finds you. I told Henry I wouldn't do magic, but I wanted to see you, and I still have not found a way to reach the world Emma and Snow are lost in. Hopefully he will forgive me once I've retrieve his birth mother.
You said you wanted to know more about my story and though I cannot be there to tell it to you in person, I thought I'd write it down. You can decide for yourself if you even want to speak to me again after reading. I have done horrible things, to those I've hated and loved, and I can't expect anyone to understand. Still, you were honest with me, and kind, and I feel I owe you the truth.
At the same time, I don't know why that is. Maybe the writing will help me.
The remaining pages explored the details of Regina's fall into darkness: many misdeeds, manipulations, even murder. River lapped up the words hungrily, marking the spots of each similar place where a tear had dried on the page.
The enactment of the curse was given space too – the description of Storybrooke and all of its measures to keep the residents ignorant, the arrival of one Emma Swan, the slipping away of Regina's son. River found herself crying too, in horrified awe of just how much the mayor had lived, at how many years the woman had remained in a place unmarked by the passage of time. At the lengths to which she had gone to protect herself, her son, and her own plot of revenge.
River was not unfamiliar with feeling so many years and yet seeming too young. She knew too the dangers of revenge, the ease of slipping into violent means. And perhaps River had not gone to the same extremes as Regina, but she had still plotted, stolen, deceived, and killed to get what she wanted. She was not an innocent woman.
And the fact that Regina had chosen to divulge so much to a near stranger, that she was willing to give up her son to protect him and she was still looking for a woman she admitted to despising, seemed to River like a change of heart. Perhaps not total redemption, but Regina seemed eager to undo at least some of the damage she'd wrought. River felt that was admirable.
She lay in her bed for a long time after she was done reading the letter, trying to reconcile the memory of the woman she'd met only once with the woman described in the long and brutal telling. It was difficult at first, but then River knew just how much a person could change, especially over the span of such a long life.
River turned in her bed, assuming a position of rest. She was surprised but warmed to find that her pillow held an unfamiliar scent: a light perfume that she knew must be from Regina's collection. She inhaled deeply and smiled to herself.
She eventually drifted to sleep, still in her gaudy gown, still clutching the pages of the letter in her hands. She dreamt of another place, a sleepy town where the residents were no longer asleep, and where the woman she thought of as mayor was no longer mayor at all.
Regina paced in her home. A number of failed attempts to cross dimensions had left her drained over the last few days. At least she'd been able to do the rites of passage from her home now instead of the Storybrooke jail. It was necessary anyway. She couldn't leave her home anymore without being spat upon in the streets of the town she'd once ruled.
She'd visited Stormcage twice in one day. The first time she'd been crestfallen to discover the woman was not there.
The practise of her travelling was leaving her thankfully less exhausted than it had at first. She had less time to wait between leaving and returning, her magic strengthening with each attempt. But she still needed some time to recover. So instead of pacing, she'd curled up in River's cot and slept for a spell, secretly hoping that its resident would arrive while she was resting.
She had no such luck, of course.
When she was ready, she returned to her home and sat at her desk with a long feather pen and deep red ink, unsure of exactly what she was going to write, but knowing she had to do something to still her unease.
She'd written pages and pages, almost blindly, committing every painful memory she could conjure, unable, of course, to include everything. There was a kind of comfort in putting the story down. She hoped the reader would forgive her a little, but she knew it was unlikely. She slipped the paper into a fresh envelope and wrote the name across the front more carefully than ever.
She'd returned to Stormcage the same day to deliver it, wondering if this time the woman would be waiting. She was not. Regina had left the letter there, waited again for her energy to return, and come back to a house that seemed, somehow, even emptier than she'd left it.
And then she'd slept again, more exhausted by her abashed hopes than by the use of her magic. She dreamt of places she'd never been, people she'd heard River speak of but had never met, and a nutty man with a blue box who'd swept River away just when Regina had needed her most. Even in her dreams, she burned with jealousy.
River awoke to the sound of crackling in the air beside her. Her sleep has been restless the past few days, worrying in spite of herself of the events she knew were unfolding at Demon's Run. But she also ached for the arrival of another guest, one she somehow missed more than seemed appropriate. The abrupt awakening made her open her eyes immediately and she sat up straight in bed.
A purplish cloud of smoke was unfolding in her cell and she watched, enraptured, as a woman finally appeared out of it. Her dark hair whipped around her face and her lips moved soundlessly in incantation.
When the fog dissipated and Regina's eyes opened and found River sitting smirking in her cot, she brightened at once.
"You're here," Regina said.
River's smile broadened.
"I am, sweetie." River replied as she stood. She hesitated only a moment before wrapping the woman in her arms. It was strange to feel so strongly, but it felt right. After all, she knew about nearly all of the woman's life by now, had held the words of it in her hands, had re-read the letter over and over until the pages were thoroughly wrinkled.
Regina was stiff in her arms at first, unprepared for affection in the midst of being so alone and so untended to. But she eventually relaxed and reciprocated, putting her arms around River as if that was where they were meant to be all along.
"I thought maybe they'd released you. That I'd come back to find my letter sitting on your bed." Regina said with a dark laugh. She pulled back from the embrace, her arms still hanging lightly on the woman's hips. "I was afraid I'd never see you again."
River shook her head.
"Not so. I do escape from time to time, but they'd never release me for what I've done. This place is my home now." River said.
Regina finally left the woman's arms and took a seat on the cot.
"I am so sorry about your son," River said, taking Regina's hand as she sat beside her. She looked into her deep brown eyes, searching them for hope, desperately wishing the woman still had some left.
Regina only nodded.
"I was afraid to come back, too. I," Regina hesitated. "You don't hate me?"
River smiled and shook her head.
"I can't hate you." She said.
"Why not?" Regina asked in disbelief.
River paused to consider her answer. She supposed it was strange to be so forgiving to someone who'd done so much wrong, to be so complacent with someone she knew could do her very serious harm. But there was a feeling inside her tugging so strongly that it would not let her cast judgement on this woman.
"We have all done wrong, some of us more than others. But these things aren't simply done. There are so many forces at work, so many strings pulling us in so many directions. Perhaps you made choices that are regrettable, but you are trying now, aren't you? Trying your best to make some amends?" River said.
"Yes." Regina said.
"I think I see that. And I understand what it is to be someone's tool, to be manipulated by many into becoming what you never wished to be. It doesn't mean you were right, but you can become right. Is that something you want?" River asked.
"Yes." Regina affirmed again. "But how can I ever hope to stop being her?"
Regina's voice was wavering, her eyes brimmed with tears. River knew from what she'd read that the her being referred to was not only the evil queen Regina once was, but the monster mother she'd been so afraid of becoming.
"You're already doing it. You can't take back anything you've done. Your past is just a story. And once you realize this, it has no power over you." River finished, smiling at her borrowed words from an author from Amy and Rory's time. It seemed especially apt for the woman in front of her.
Regina was dumbstruck and remained quiet. She kept her eyes on River's, afraid to break the gaze.
"Do you believe me?" River said finally.
Regina nodded. River smiled.
"Good," River said. Then, before she could think about what she was doing, she leaned in and captured Regina's lips with hers, meeting the brunette's initial resistance with a hand at the nape of her neck, pulling her closer.
Regina's eyes fell shut and she gave in to the sensation. She'd forgotten what this was like, to feel wanted by someone. She'd forgotten how good it felt. Regina had never been this way with a woman before, but somehow it felt right. River made her feel safer, stronger, and more desirable than she had in a very long time.
Regina gasped against the woman's lips as she was pulled to straddle River's lap. She took a moment to stare down into the woman's devilish green eyes.
"My, my, Ms. Song. You are something, aren't you?"
"Oh, sweetie. You have no idea." River said before attacking Regina's mouth again.
Regina curled her fingers around the straps of River's tank top and River gripped the brunette's hips forcefully. Regina couldn't help but rock her hips back and forth a bit against River's thighs, thankful she'd worn a pantsuit today instead of a skirt, though the possibilities of the latter option now seemed rather alluring.
River's hands were busy, roaming Regina's body hungrily, divesting her of her blazer and going to work on the buttons of her shirt.
"This isn't what I wanted when I came here," Regina said breathily, hoping she was understood. River nodded absently as she continued to undress her.
"Is it what you want now?" River said.
Instead of replying Regina planted her lips firmly against River's, slipping her tongue into the woman's eager mouth. River's hands momentarily forgot their work.
Regina trailed her hands from River's shoulders down to her breasts, kneading them roughly, eliciting a little moan from River's throat. Regina returned the sound as River's hand slipped into her pants, down the front of her underwear.
The prisoner cupped her and Regina thrust her hips into the touch, planting her hands against the wall behind River for support as she rocked back and forth. River trailed her lips down Regina's throat and sucked harshly at her pulse point. Regina gasped, working her hips faster.
River's fingers worked more methodically now, rubbing frantically in circles.
"Don't stop," Regina managed. In reply, River hummed against her throat. Her mouth moved further, trailing down the front of Regina's chest, and she bit the inside of her right breast. Regina let out a little cry and faltered for a moment, nearly falling over before River caught her with her free hand and encouraged her hips to keep their pace.
River stopped her mouth for a moment to catch her breath, though her hand never stilled. She looked up to watch the other woman's face as she gave in to her arousal. River smirked.
"Put your arms around me," River instructed. Regina complied, her arms folding behind River's neck. The move had the desired effect, improving the angle of River's hand. Regina breathed roughly next to River's ear. Her breaths increased in force and frequency. River bit the woman's earlobe and sucked at it greedily.
"Oh god," Regina said, barely registering her own words as she tipped towards the edge.
River nipped at her neck once more and Regina was done for, leaning more heavily into the prisoner's body as she rode out the series of quakes running through the course of her. River held her and drew their cheeks together until she found her lips again, planting soft kisses as the woman returned to herself.
Eventually, River drew her hand out of the trousers and brought her fingers to her lips, catching Regina's eyes as she tasted them. River hummed in approval. Regina's mouth was dry.
"You are… very sweet. Did you know?" River said with another of her smirks.
"And you are very good, River." Regina said, returning the smile.
For a moment, they just looked at each other, still a little surprised at how quickly things had escalated. River felt a little pang of guilt knowing she had a husband who didn't know he was her husband. She'd allowed herself little trysts before, but this was something else. She knew what she was feeling towards Regina went far beyond a random shag.
Regina dragged her thumb along River's cheek.
"What are you thinking about?" Regina asked.
"Hmm. How life holds such surprises, I suppose." River said. "What are you thinking about?"
Regina laughed.
"I think I've forgotten how to think just now." She said.
"Good. Then I have accomplished what I set out for," River replied.
"Oh? And what was that?"
"Taking you away from it all, if only for a moment." River said seriously. Her hands were on Regina's hips, her thumbs slipped under the edge of Regina's shirt, drawing little circles against her skin.
"River," Regina breathed. She was still in awe by how much this woman meant to her after such a short time.
"You have to go back soon, don't you?" River said. She turned her eyes away. Regina put her fingers under the woman's chin and turned her face back towards her.
"Come with me."
"What?" River was sure she'd heard wrong.
"Come with me," Regina repeated. "If you think you can skip out for a few days. I have a big empty house to myself. I'd love to have company. You can help me, observe my work if you'd like."
"I'd love to come. Although not just to observe." River said with a mischievous grin.
Regina smiled and kissed the woman again, just gently. She extricated herself from River's lap and picked up her blazer from the floor. She threw it back on and buttoned her shirt back up, impressed by the deftness of River's hands when her mouth was so busily employed.
"You do work fast, don't you?" Regina said.
"I don't like to waste time." River replied.
"Then let's not waste anymore," Regina said. She held out her hand and River took it gladly, moving in close to stand inches from the woman's body.
"Hold on to me," Regina said.
"Gladly." River said.
Regina began to mouth her incantation, eager to return to her home with the bounty in her arms.