Ok, I think I may have to change this to M for asking about Viagra and stuff like that Lol. And for language when I ask our Grimm-kitty his questions.


CHAPTER TWO
Jushiro Ukitake

1. When did your hair turn white?

Jushiro- When I had a bad TB attack that put me to bed for three days.

Me- Oh well. You look cute with white hair.

Jushiro- Thank you?

2. What are your real oppinions of your third seats?

Jushiro- Kiyone and Sentarou can be very good when sober and when they aren't trying to rip each others throats out.

Me- It is quite entertaining though. It's funny how Isane is so quiet when Kiyone is so loud.

Jushiro- *Tapping finger on chin* I wonder if Retsu would trade...

3. Speaking of Retsu, what's your relationship with the Squad Four captain?

Jushiro- We're best friends.

Me- I thought Shunsui wa your best friend.

Jushiro- I can have two best friends.

Me- I think you like Retsu~. *Jushiro blushes*

Jushiro- I do not! It's strictly professional!

Me- Sure. You always smile a lot when she's around though. And you've got to admit that you thought she looked pretty good in that bathing suit when you went to the beach. (Episode 228)

Jushiro- So she did look pretty in the bathing suit, but that doesn't mean I like her. And it's impossible not to smile around her. It's a natural habit of mine to smile.

Me- Whatever. So you don't care if I tell you that he secretly freaks out every time you have a TB attack? *Jushiro's eyes widen.*

Jushiro- She does?! *I nod.* Well... *He fakes a cough.*

4. Don't you think your zanpaku-to is the most adorable zanpaku-to ever? Twin boys! How cute is that?!

Jushiro- Is this a double question? But yes, they are pretty cute.

Me- Pretty cute! They are squealing fangirl adorable! I started talking in my baby voice when I saw them. *Points at computer screen and starts talking in baby tones* Aren't they just too cute!

Jushiro- They can be a handful sometimes though. Sometimes it feels like they are my children.

Me- You would be a great daddy. With mommy Retsu! *Jushiro's eye twitches.*

Jushiro- I told you, there nothing between me and Retsu!

Me- I say there is, and that's that!

5. When did you and Shunsui meet?

Jushiro- At the Academy when I had a TB attack. I was in for that while Shunsui was getting a head injury treated.

Me- Head injury?

Jushiro- He said the wrong thing to a group of girls. *I laugh* Retsu was there helping and that's how we met.

Me- I didn't ask how you two met. I asked how you and Shunsui met. See?! You talk about her without even thinking!

Jushiro- Shut up!

6. Is the head captain cool?

Jushiro- Of course! He trained me!

Me- Well... He's not cool unless he joins the Soul Reaper Men's Association.

Jushiro- I can't imagine him in sunglasses.

Me- *Shudders* Me either.

7. Why do you always give Toshiro candy?

Jushiro- Because his hair is similar to mine.

Me- You know he almost never eats the candy. *Jushiro begins to pout.* I'll eat it though! Yummy!

8. If Retsu ever showed up at your doorstep in the middle of the night, would you let her in?

Jushiro- What's with all these Retsu questions?

Me- JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Jushiro- *Holds hands in front of them* Okay! Of course I would. She's one of my best friends. Besides, I couldn't just turn her away. That wouldn't be very gentleman like of me, now would it?

Me- It would be against your nature. But seriously, I see a little connection goin on between you two!

Jushiro- Next question. Please.

9. How come you are sick, yet look so incredibly sexy in a bathing suit that I actually screamed when I saw ep. 228?

Jushiro- I don't know. I guess it's the 1000 years of fighting I guess. It really helps.

Me- Yes. I guess fighting helps keep muscles toned and smexy.

Jushiro- Smexy?

Me- Yes smexy! You're too hot for your own good! *sighs/groans* You and Byakuya don't realize how hot you are.

Jushiro- When did he get into all this?

Me- In the first chapter. I called him a turtle too. He didn't like it.

Jushiro- Well, I wouldn't either if I was called a reptile.

Me- You're missing the point!

Jushiro- And that is???

Me- You look totally hot in a bathing suit! Why did Renji have to wear a shirt?! That really pissed me off... And what was that thing Sentarou wore?! *Almost gags*

Jushiro- I told him not to wear that.

Me- I wasn't really paying attention to him anyways. I was too busy freaking out over the fact that you were shirtless and in a bathing suit. Then when I saw Byakuya and you, I almost died of a nosebleed.

Jushiro- I would get a doctor to look at that. Retsu maybe.

10. What are your siblings like?

Jushiro- They can be kind. When we were younger we loved to play in the woods. I wasn't quite fond of being the oldest though.

Me- Why?

Jushiro- *Starts talking in a high pitche voice.* Jushiro! Kill the spider! Kill the spider! Ever single day there was some sort of bug in my sister's rooms.

11. Why isn't Rukia a seated officer?

Jushiro- Byakuya won't let her because it increases her risk of getting injured.

Me- *Goes starry eyed* He does care after all!

Jushiro- He's always cared. He just shows it in a weird way.

Me- Either way, I wasn't very happy with him for choosing his parent's vow instead of the promise to Hisana. *Crosses arms* Stupid noble pride.

Jushiro- How did he come into this converstaion again?

Me- Because I asked why Rukia can't be a seated officer.

Jushiro- Oh.

12. Do you read Fanfiction?

Jushiro- Not really. Only when I need a good laugh.

Me- Oh... So you haven't read any stories about you and Retsu?

Jushiro- There's stories about us? *I nod* What about?

Me- Ummmmm........ A lot of things. A lot are lemons.

Jushiro- A tangy fruit?

Me- No. You know, smut. *Jushiro is silent* Do I have to explain smut to you too?

Jushiro- Do I want to know? *I groan and explain. Again* What?! THAT'S what smut is?! Who are these people?!

Me- Geniuses! Everyone knows you and Retsu belong together except you and Retsu!

Jushiro- Why?

Me- Because! You would make the cutest couple. And cutest babies.

Jushiro- When did babies come into the picture?! *I start making different looks for imaginary babies* Are you sane?

Me- I'm asking the questions here! And yes, I am sane.

13. You do want children don't you?

Jushiro- Can we please get off the subject of children?

Me- Just answer the question!

Jushiro- I would like to have children one day, yes.

Me- Well, you'd better hurry. The clock is ticking away!

Jushiro- Clock?

Me- Yes. The clock. Soon you're gonna have to take a little pill that goes with the Viva Las Vegas song. *Starts singing Viva Las Vegas*

Jushiro- Pill? *I sigh*

Me- You don't know what I'm talking about, do you?

Jushiro- Want to fill me in? *I start laughing.* What?

Me- Nothing. Nothing at all!

14. Have you ever had a one night stand?

Jushiro- No! Of course not! That is absurd!

15. Have you ever masturbated?

Jushiro- I don't think I have to answer that.

Me- Then you have.

Jushiro- Why do you say that?!

Me- Because, whenever a guy says he hasn't done something, it means he has!

Jushiro- Thats no true! Go ask Shunui that! Not me!

Me- But your facial expressions are funnier!

Jushiro- But that's rude to even ask that! Much less.. Never mind.

Me- And you still haven't answered my question.

Jushiro- And I am not answering that.

Me- You sound like Byakuya...

Jushiro- Smart man.

16. Would you ever die your hair?

Jushiro- No. I rather like my white hair.

Me- And I would hurt you.

Jushiro- Why?

Me- Because you're hot with white hair.

Jushiro- I wonder about you sometimes Byakuya'sGirl90210.

Me- Me too.

17. Do you know what Viagra is?

Jushiro- Do I need to know?

Me- You will in the future if you wait another 1000 years to have a sex life.

Jushiro- I still don't want to know.

Me- I'm gonna tell you anyway. It's when men have a problem getting their... Certain area to work. *Jushiro's eyes widened as he looks at me with a disgusted face.*

Jushiro- NEXT QUESTION! *Starts coughing*

18. Would you like to meet the genius Tite Kubo?

Jushiro- I would. I wouldn't be here if he didn't have to idea for bleach.

Me- And there would be no good stories on Fanfiction to read. No good lemons between you and Retsu. Yummy. Lemon zingyness.

Jushiro- *Shaking head* There is something wrong with you.

19. Has anyone ever professed their love for you?

Jushiro- One. She was a nut though. Kind of like how I am starting to think of you.

Me- I am not a nut! I am.. Creative. That's why I'm in a creative writing class.

Jushiro- Please tell me you don't write about me.

Me- For once, no. But almost everyone in the club wathes bleach. We talk about it often. But you are my favorite character besides Byakuya. *smiles* You're so awsome.

Jushiro- Thank you.

Me- You're welcome! You're just too sweet for your own good! You don't like hurting people's feelings, do you?

Jushiro- I try to avoid hurting people's feelings.

Me- Unlike Byakuya...

Jushiro- Well, Byakuya was just raised that way. He was a wonderful suboribate though.

20. Did you know that a lot of people write smut about you and Shunsui?

Jushiro- I am not gay!

Me- I know. I'm not the one who writes it. Tell them that. I pair you with Retsu, not men.

Jushiro- We're just friends!

Me- Not according to me! You two belong together and that's that!!!! Stop being so stupid and just ask the woman to dinner!

Jushiro- As friends, sure. *I glare dangerously* Okay! Okay! But I'm telling you, she just wants to be friends.

Me- Yay! *I jump up and leave*

Jushiro- Um, goodbye?

Well, there's our Jushiro! Up next, Rukia!