Chapter 2

Don't Be Stupid

"I don't know why you're surprised Jackie," Donna said, patting her back comfortingly. "Kelso's a moron."

"Donna! That is not what you're supposed to say when your best friend gets cheated on."

"Well it's true! Frankly, I'm just shocked it took you this long to catch him."

Jackie looked crestfallen at that last remark.

"Oh Jackie, I'm sorry," Donna said, wrapping her tiny friend in a hug. "Seriously, Kelso's a complete idiot. You can do so much better."

"Well no duh, Donna. I am the prettiest girl in Point Place you know," Jackie said, recovering from her earlier moment of weakness.

"Yea, Jackie," Donna said sardonically, rolling her eyes. "What's not to love about you?"

"Exactly Donna. Why, just the other day, Michael said if I wasn't a junior, I'd definitely win prom queen." Her eyes widened in horror as she spoke. "Oh my God, Donna! Prom!"

"What about it?"

"Well, who am I going to go with? I can't go with Michael, the cheating bastard."

"Jackie, it's no big deal," Donna said. "Just go stag."

Jackie looked horrified. "Stag?! I can't go stag, Donna! Oh gross, only losers and fat girls go stag!"

"I went stag last year, Jackie," Donna said pointedly.

"Exactly! I can't possibly go stag. No doubt Michael will have a date. If I go alone, I'll be the laughing stock of the school. I'd rather not go at all then go alone."

"Well then, don't go."

"Donna, be serious. What would prom be without me?"

"Um, quiet?"

Jackie ignored her. "I just need to find the perfect date."

"Uh, Jackie, prom is on Saturday. How are you gonna find a date in week?"

"Oh Donna, you're so funny. As if I couldn't get a date."

"Right," Donna said, picking up her magazine. Jackie might be small in stature, but the girl certainly wasn't lacking in ego.

"Thanks for the talk, Donna! I gotta go, these guys aren't just going to line up to ask me out themselves, you know!" She paused. "Actually, they probably will." With that, she skipped cheerfully from the room.

"Donna, you're pipsqueak boyfriend is here," Bob called out from down the stairs.

"Hey Satan," Eric said, passing Jackie in the hallway.

"Shut up, String-Bean," Jackie retorted.

Eric sauntered into Donna's room. "Hey baby," he said, wiggling his eyebrows at her. "I see the bitch has her bite back."

"Unfortunately," Donna laughed. "She's off to find the perfect prom date."

"A week before prom?" Eric's eyes were wide. "Even Jackie can't think that's possible."

"Well she does, she's determined to have a better date than Kelso."

"Speaking of Kelso," Eric drawled. "Did you happen to notice that we're alone for the first time in a while?" He gave her a sly grin and kicked the door shut behind him, before coming to join her on the bed, kissing her passionately as he did so.

"God, I want you," he murmured against her lips, his hands going to the buttons at the front of her shirt.

"No boys in the bedroom," Bob called out, eliciting a frustrated groan from Eric.

Donna laughed. "Sorry Twerp, but could you at least pretend you care about foreplay before going right for the goods?"

"Hey, I care about foreplay," Eric protested.

"Right, you've been in my room for all of three minutes and already my shirt's half off."

Eric looked sheepish.

"I'm just saying, sometimes it's nice to take your time." Donna said, re-buttoning her shirt. "Come on, before my dad comes up here with a gun.

Eric blanched. "Your dad has a gun?"

Donna chuckled. "No, but I bet if he told Red you were in my room with the door closed, Red would come over with his."

"Don't even joke about that," Eric said, a bit sickly, as they left the room.