Chapter One
(The Doctor's universe…)
Rose and Martha sat on Rose's bed laughing and talking. In the last six months, the two of them had grown close and they both loved to spend time together. Even though Martha was a few years older than Rose, she found that the younger girl had wisdom far beyond her years. She guessed a lot of that came from traveling with the Doctor, but she sensed some of it was innate as well.
That was where they were when the Doctor opened the door and stuck his head in.
"How are my two favorite girls doing this afternoon?" he asked with a twinkle in his eyes.
Rose and Martha smiled at him.
"We're just fine, thanks." Martha replied.
"Yup, we're just sitting in here talking about girl stuff."
The Doctor made snoring sounds.
"What, you know something better to do?" Rose asked.
"Indeed I do and if you go to the console room, you'll find the something better to do all ready for ya!" the Doctor replied.
Rose and Martha looked at each other. Grinning, they got off of Rose's bed and went past the Doctor towards the console room.
"Oh yes, I wonder where we've landed now?" Rose asked.
"I hope it's somewhere good." Martha said running alongside her. "I hated those slime monsters we just fought. So icky!"
"Yeah, tell me about it. I think I showered for three hours straight after that!"
They ran into the console room and stopped. They looked around at the walls. There were paper cut-outs of palm trees and pineapples on the walls and the console had a grass skirt around the edge. They looked over and noticed the Doctor had put a wooden table just beside the door.
"What is this?" Martha asked.
They looked back at the Doctor as he slipped a pink lei around Rose's neck and a purple lei around Martha.
"This, my loyal and overworked companions who definitely need a rest, is the first annual Hawaii day in the TARDIS."
He walked past them into the room and Rose saw he was wearing a yellow lei and a grass skirt.
"Aloha!" the Doctor said spreading his arms out. "Welcome to the TARDIS luau!"
He walked over to the captain's chair, reached under it and brought out a boom box. He switched it on and Hawaiian music filled the air.
"Hawaiian moods." He said showing them the CD. "Got it for two pounds at a shop several years ago. Been looking for a reason to play it and now I have one."
He laid the CD down beside the boom box and walked back towards Rose and Martha.
"Excuse me ladies." He said walking past them. "I will return with refreshment in a moment, until then enjoy the music."
Rose and Martha looked at each other.
"Hawaii day? Only he would think of that." She said hooking her thumb back at the door.
Rose grinned.
"Yeah, but ya gotta admit, he looks cute in a grass skirt."
They giggled.
"What's the giggling about?" the Doctor said walking past with an enormous punch bowl in his hands.
"You and your grass skirt." Martha said.
They giggled when the Doctor shot them a look.
"I'll have you know this is authentic. Got it from a hula dancer about two hundred years ago." He said setting the punch bowl on the table.
"Yeah, definitely smells like its two hundred years old." Rose said.
"Oi!" he said as she and Martha giggled.
He grinned and winked at them as he stepped out of the room. He returned a moment later carrying a metal tray with cups on it.
"Help yourself ladies." He said indicating the ladle in the punchbowl.
"Do you need help carrying stuff in?" Rose asked.
"No, I'm fine, just go ahead and have a drink." The Doctor said breezing past them.
Rose and Martha walked over and spooned some of the red punch into the cups. They stood by the table and sipped it.
"Mmm, this is good, wonder what it is?" Martha asked.
"Hawaiian Punch, of course." The Doctor said as he carried a large wooden bowl in and set it on the table.
He walked back out of the room as Rose and Martha looked at the contents of the bowl.
"What the hell is this?" Martha asked as she stared at the pinkish grey pudding-like substance in the bowl.
"You got me. It looks like something he found on some planet somewhere." Rose replied.
Martha made a face.
"He expects us to eat this?" she said indicating the bowl.
"Yes," the Doctor said coming into the room with a tray of sliced pineapple. "I slaved for hours over that poi and I expect you to eat it."
"Poi? Is that what this crap is?" Martha asked.
"Yup," the Doctor said setting the tray on the table beside the bowl. "Eat up."
He breezed back out the door.
Martha looked at Rose.
"You first, Rose." She said.
"No, that's okay; you can have a go at it." Rose replied.
Martha stared at the glop in the bowl.
"How about we both go at the same time?" she asked Rose.
Rose shrugged.
"Fine with me." She said.
They both stuck their index fingers in the bowl and lifted them out. They brought the poi-covered finger to their mouth.
"Ready?" Martha asked.
"Ready."
"Go!"
Both of them shoved their fingers in their mouths, tasted the poi and made a face.
"Oh God, this is gross." Martha said backing away from the bowl.
Rose grimaced.
"That's all I'm gonna eat of that." She said grabbing her cup of punch and taking a huge swig.
"Good idea." Martha said taking a swig out of her own cup.
The Doctor returned carrying a tray of sliced ham in one hand and paper plates and plastic forks and spoons in the other. He paused and looked at the uneaten food.
"Eat." He said setting everything down. "You don't have to wait on me."
"We just tried that poi." Martha said pointing to the bowl.
"Oh, you did? How is it?"
Martha and Rose made faces.
"Oh, come on, it can't be that bad!" the Doctor said. "This is a delicacy in Hawaii."
"Have you ever eaten it?" Martha challenged.
"Well, no…"
"Eat it!" Rose and Martha said in unison.
The Doctor stared at the poi for a moment. He dipped his finger in and tasted it. He made a face and stuck his tongue out as Rose and Martha nodded.
"Okay," he said grabbing the bowl of poi. "You don't have to eat this, but eat the rest; I made it especially for ya."
He carried the bowl away as Rose and Martha grabbed a plate and a fork and put the ham and pineapple on the plate.
"Mmmm, now this is more like it." Rose said swallowing the ham.
Martha nodded.
"Pineapple's good too." She said. "I wonder what made him decide to do this."
Rose smiled.
"Oh, we always did stuff like this in the past. I'd just wake up one day and he'd have this crazy little party put together just for the two of us. I loved it."
She looked at Martha.
"Why, didn't he do this with you?"
Martha shook her head.
"Most of the time he wasn't in the mood for silly things like this." She said. "I was lucky if could get him to smile or laugh. This is totally new to me."
Rose sighed.
"I'm sorry, Martha, it must have been Hell traveling with the Doctor when he was missing me." She said.
"Yeah, it was pretty rough at times. That's why I'm glad we got you back. He's a lot more fun to be around now."
"What are you talking about; I'm always fun to be around. It's a party 24/7 with little ole me." The Doctor said walking back into the room.
He stopped and smiled when he noticed Rose and Martha eating the food.
"Good?" he asked them.
"Very good." Rose said as Martha nodded.
His grin was a mile wide.
"Good!" he said happily.
He kissed Rose and Martha on the cheek.
"And now, "he said stepping back. "We will now commence the entertainment portion of our party. I give you the hula!"
Rose and Martha paused in mid-chew as the Doctor raised his arms and began to hula dance. Rose nearly choked on her ham and Martha turned away as they watched his God-awful dance moves. The Doctor for his part seemed totally oblivious to their snickers and pointed looks at each other as he did what he thought was a graceful interpretation of the hula.
"Learned this from the same hula dancer who gave me my skirt." He said swaying back and forth. "I was a big hit at the luau that night."
"Yeah, I bet," Rose whispered to Martha. "They were probably all laughing their arses off at his crappy dancing."
Martha choked on her punch.
He finished up and took a bow as Rose and Martha whistled and cheered.
"Thank you!" he said. "And now for the second part of my program I will serenade you with ukulele music."
"Oh, Jesus, I'm not gonna be able to keep a straight face through this one." Martha whispered to Rose.
The Doctor reached into the doorway and brought out a tiny ukulele. He walked over to them and plucked the strings, testing them as Rose and Martha quickly took a swig of punch to hide their grins.
He cleared his throat as Rose and Martha glanced at each other.
"Mi, mi, mi, mi!" he sang.
He cleared his throat again and plucked the strings a couple of times. He paused with his hand over the strings and then to Rose and Martha's shock, he began to strum the ukulele as fast as he could. As the God-awful twang filled the TARDIS, he raised his head and began to scream.
COME ON FEEL THE NOIZE!
GIRLS, ROCK YOUR BOYZ!
WE'LL GET WILD, WILD, WILD!
WILD, WILD, WILD!
He stopped playing and grinned at Rose and Martha who were now bent over the table roaring with laughter. His eyes twinkled as he sat the ukulele down on the edge of the table and put his hands on their backs.
"Oh Christ, my sides hurt now!" Rose said leaning up. "I thought you were being completely serious!"
"Yeah, I wasn't expecting that." Martha added.
"I gotta ask though. The whole hula dance. That was a joke too, right?"
The Doctor frowned.
"No, that wasn't a joke." He said confused. "Why would you think it was a joke?"
Rose and Martha giggled. Rose put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a kiss.
"Just a little piece of advice, my darling, in the future if you're thinking of showing your hula dance to anyone other than me and Martha, I'd advise against it."
She and Martha giggled insanely as the Doctor eyed them.
"Fine, if you can't appreciate good dancing, I'll refrain in future." He said sniffing.
He grinned when Rose and Martha rolled their eyes and giggled. He swept them both up in a hug and held them tightly smiling as the love of his life and his best friend hugged him back. He thanked Rassilon every day that Rose was returned to him even if the method of return was unconventional. He briefly thought of his alternate self and gave a little shiver. He hoped his double would be safely locked away for the rest of his lives. He hated to think what would happen if he ever got out.