And That

Disclaimer: Criminal Minds isn't mine.

Gideon took Reid back to his apartment and noted the total silence on the journey. He noted the way Reid stared directly ahead of him. He noted the still hands resting on his lap and he noted the small tear running down Reid's face. When they got to Jason's apartment he parked up and went round and opened up Reid's door. He just sat and stared. Gideon hesitated in touching him right now so he said his name.

"Reid, we are here." Very very slowly Reid turned his head to look at Jason. It was like he was having to fight some impulse to not look. For a fleeting second Reid's eyes looked dead then a look of pure terror took its place. Gideon tentatively reached out for Spencer with his hand. Just gently on Reid's shoulder. He yelped almost like a wild animal and flinched back from the contact but his eyes were pleading for help.

"I won't hurt you Spencer. You know I would never hurt you."

It looked like was going to say something, but held it back and slowly got out of the car. He stood and looked around as if he had never been there before.

Jason led the way up to his door and unlocked and turned off the alarm. Spencer followed him in and just stood in the hallway.

"Coffee?" Jason offered walking to the kitchen area.

"No. Something stronger." His voice was low and croaky. He sounded wrong somehow. He could see it was Reid, but he wasn't acting like Reid or talking like Reid.

"OK what would you like?" And he walked over to the drinks cabinet on the back wall.

"Whisky."

He still just stood in the hallway.

"Spencer you can come in you know. How do you want this?"

"Uh hu – straight." He just stood and watched Gideon. Jason was beginning to feel very uncomfortable. He lifted the tumbler up for Reid, but didn't take it to him. He had never seen Spencer drink spirits before. He was thinking there was a lot about Dr Reid he didn't know. Things he should know. Things Reid was hiding behind that intelligence. He put the drink down on the side and left it for Reid to take when he was ready.

"So Spencer, what happened between you and Hotch?"

"That's not your business Gideon." A low hiss of a voice.

"I am trying to help y……………….."

"I don't want your help. Leave me alone. Get out of my life. Stop manipulating me to be how you wish you were. I am not you. I will never be you. I am me so let me live being me."

"Spen………."

"Don't call me Spencer."

Gideon put up his hands in a sign of defeat and moved over to his music system and put on something quiet and relaxing. Reid just stood and watched.

"Join me. Just for a chat. A game of chess."

"I don't want to talk to you and I don't play chess." He turned and started to walk back towards the door as a tear tracked its way down his face.

"Reid? What's wrong? Please talk to me." Jason moved a few steps closer to Reid but was afraid he would appear threatening so moved slowly and cautiously. Reid reached the door and stood with his back to it. He mouthed something to Gideon. If he has said it, it was too quiet for him to hear, but his mouth said 'help me' as he slid down the door and sat with his knees drawn up close and his arms wrapped around them. Jason sat on the floor in front of Reid and put a hand out to him. He still didn't touch. He would leave that for when Reid could. It took a long time. He watched Reid's face as some inner turmoil span and tried to eat him away. Slowly Reid's hand moved forwards. Gideon could see that the effort was making the man he thought of as a son tremble. He wanted to just move over and hold him, but he knew this would not help Reid. That would only help himself and he had a feeling that people had been helping themselves to Spencer for a long time now in one way or another.

Words span in Jason's mind 'I always take advantage of Reid for his mind.'

How many of them did that. How many times a day did they all look at Reid for some statistic or another. How many times did they look amused rather than impressed? How much advantage had been taken of Reid?

And as he sat and thought these things something gently brushed his fingers. He looked down at Reid's hand and the bitten fingernails and the split skin on his knuckles. Those hands which had once been so delicate and white. Now abused. Jason watched Reid's shaking hand move like a butterfly over his and land softly. Gideon was afraid to move in case he scared it away. They both just sat and looked. Neither man said anything. Gradually Jason moved his hand so he could clasp Reid's in his. Spencer's hands were ice cold. He could see his nails were turning blue. He looked up at Reid's face as he opened his mouth as though to say something and just sat with his mouth slightly open his hand suddenly limp.

…………

They inspected the monitors and sent copied for Garcia to look at closer. Hotch joined her as they watched Reid standing talking to Flanders.

"Why did he go there? I don't understand." Garcia looked to her boss for answers.

"I don't know." Hotch wasn't going to get into the complexities of all of this with the tech.

"But he reaches out for that scum bag. Why?" and Garcia froze the frame where their fingers joined. "And when Reid is on the floor he does it again. What's he playing at?" but when Garcia looked up Hotch was gone.

……….

"Reid I am going to get you that coffee. It will warm your hands at least. Come with me." And as he started to stand he gently guided Reid up off the floor with one hand and locked the door with the other. The two of them walked slowly to the kitchen area still holding hands. Reid stared at their hands and tried to bend his fingers to hold Gideon's but though he brain wanted him to, his body denied him.

"Gideon?" That was Reid's voice. Quiet and almost afraid sounding, yet still Reid's "I remember what he did to me."

Jason looked at Spencer and nodded. "It will come back to you Spencer. Give it time."

"I remember it all." And that damned tear down his cheek again.

"Flanders is a sick very intelligent man Spencer. It wasn't your fault."

"No, not Flanders. Hotch." And Reid was shaking.

"Hotch? What are you talking about Reid?" Gideon held tighter onto Reid's hand afraid if he let go Reid would run from him. "Talk to me Spencer." And with his other hand he offered the mug of hot coffee.

Gideon could almost see something float across Reid's eyes, as though something was watching from inside his head. The mug flew from Gideon's hand as Spencer swept it aside. "I don't want coffee. I told you that. And stop calling me Sp Sp Sp Spencer!"

………..

Hotch was walking down a corridor on his way to talk to Flanders. He needed to find out exactly it was he had done when he touched Reid. The security door in front of him slid aside and let him in. It closed smoothly without a sound at his back.

Flanders was standing at the bars waiting for him.

"Thought you would be back." And he was smiling at the frowning face of Aaron Hotchner.

"Tell me what you did to him." Hotch stood back a long way out of the man's reach.

"Nothing. He seized." And he was running his hands up and down the bars in an almost lustful way running his tongue over his lips.

"Tell me why he came to see you."

"He needs me."

"No, he doesn't. He needs the opposite. He needs you to leave him alone."

"And you know this because? Agent Hotchner he came to see me. He needs me. He wants me."

"What did you do to him when you touched him."

"Nothing more than you ever did Agent Aaron Hotchner!" For a second Hotch didn't understand what Floyd was saying then the blood drained from his face and he just stared at the man with the hair.

"You son of a bitch." Hotch growled at him. "What did you do?"

"Well if you are going to be rude I think I will stop this discussion now." And Floyd turned to go back to his bed at the side of the room.

"Tell me what you did."

"The problem is," he still had his back to the agent. "that I did so much to him that I no longer know where to start." And he sat down crossed his legs then looked over at Aaron and smiled.

"Here when he came to see you, what did you do to him?"

"Nothing and you know full well I did nothing. I could have, but I didn't. Why would I want to hurt Spencer? Besides that's starting at the end. Don't you want me to start at the beginning? Do you want all the gory details? You will never look at your boy in the same light again. Believe me. I know I wont."

"I just need to know what you did to him here. What is the control you have over him? Why did he come to see you? What did he want?"

"Ask him yourself and Agent Aaron Hotchner. I might be more inclined to have a longer chat with you if I had something to smoke. I am sure you know my brand by now. This talk is over." And he lay down on his bed with his hands under his head and closed his eyes. "Goodbye."

…………..