Sam waves goodbye to Teal'c and opens the door to her quiet home. She unpacks her bag, puts the laundry on and empties a can of soup into a saucepan to heat, all the while trying not to think about the decisions she has to make.

The ringing of the phone interrupts her deliberate 'not thinking'.

"Hello."

"Carter, your flight back go okay?" It's O'Neill, she has barely been home an hour and he's calling to check on her. Sam tries to ignore the warm feeling that spreads through her when she hears his voice. It's not what she should be feeling.

"Yes sir the flight was fine," Sam moves to sit onto one of her kitchen stools, "The whole trip went smoothly."

"Good." There's a pause but it's not uncomfortable. "You still have the rest of the week off. Make sure you take it."

"Yes sir." Sam responds but she's sure he can hear the lack of intention to obey that order in her voice.

"Okay," she can hear him sigh, "Give me a call if you need anything."

"Sure." She's about to hang up when she thinks of the one friend that is missing, "Sir? Is there any news on Daniel?"

"No, nothing yet," Jack's voice sounds confident and he adds, "It's Daniel Carter. Death just doesn't stick to him. Mark my words he'll turn up in typical Daniel style before the week is out."

Sam hangs up the phone and goes to pour her soup into a bowl. She eats it quickly, burning her tongue in the process but ignoring the pain. She picks up the phone and dials before she has time to hesitate.

"Pete hi, it's Sam. Can we meet?"

***

Sam was not one to sit and feel sorry for herself, no matter how tempting the thought of sitting slouched on the couch with calorie laden ice cream and chocolate was. So that was why three hours after breaking up with Pete, Sam had emptied out her kitchen cupboards and was valiantly scrubbing them clean desperately trying not to think about anything remotely related to the men in her life.

She managed for a full half hour to concentrate solely on the rhythmic scrubbing of the cupboards before thoughts of Pete crept into her head. She felt the guilt weigh heavily in her stomach as she remembered his devastated expression as she broke his heart. She deserved much more than just his simple acceptance of the break-up, she deserved to be yelled at for letting a relationship she was only half committed to progress so far. She had no way to make it up to him, no way to apologise for hurting him so badly.

He wasn't the only one who'd she hurt. Sam tried not to think of Jack, he had been nothing but civil regarding her relationship to Pete but she had seen the hurt in his eyes when she'd shown him the ring. Jack had never pushed her, he had always made it clear that she was in charge of the boundaries to their relationship. She'd set the boundaries so well that they couldn't even call each other by their first names, she was only allowed that luxury in the privacy of her own mind. She'd locked her feelings so deeply in that damn room and forced herself to move on to the first man that had shown interest. Evidently Jack had moved on too. The image of a pretty brunette looking at Jack with adoring eyes tore through her mind and Sam dropped her sponge to the floor.

She gave up on scrubbing out the cupboards and returned her saucepans and cookery to the shelves. Clearly distracting herself by cleaning was no longer working. Sam gave in to the urge and slumped down onto her comfortable couch, loneliness flooding her weary body.

For the second time that day the ring of the phone broke her depressing thoughts, "Hello?"

"Sam?" Cassie's voice echoed through the phone line and Sam felt herself relax at the sound of her adopted daughter.

"Cass, hi."

"Jack just called and told me about your Dad. I'm so sorry, you should have told me and I would have met you in DC."

"I didn't want to interrupt your study Cass." Sam knew that Cassie was only just adjusting into her first year of college and she wasn't about to pull her away. Cassandra hadn't known her Dad well, and Sam didn't want Cassie to attend another funeral so soon after burying Janet barely a year previously. No matter how badly she wanted the company.

"Don't be stupid Sam," the stern tone was so reminiscent of Janet that it bought a sad smile to Sam's face, "I would have come no matter what."

"I know."

"So what's going to happen with the wedding, is it postponed or are you going ahead anyway?" Cassie's innocent question nearly broke Sam's resolve against the tears she'd been holding in since seeing Pete rip the off the sold sign earlier that afternoon.

"It's off Cass. The wedding is off."

An hour later Sam hung up the phone and grimaced at the empty packet of chocolate that now lay next to her on the couch. Cassie had been quite persuasive, even over the phone, and Sam had given in and indulged in the sweet treat while filling Cassie in on the recent change in her private life. To her credit, Cassie had waited a full thirty minutes after her announcement to ask the obvious question.

"So what about Jack?"

"What?"

"Don't play dumb with me Miss PhD. You know what I mean."

"Leave it alone Cass."

"When I was little I always thought you two would end up together." Cassie continued as if Sam hadn't spoken, "I used to ask Mom what was keeping you guys apart and she never gave me a straight answer."

"Cassie."

"When I asked about the regs she told me that your situation just wasn't as simple as it being against the rules."

"Cassandra please." Sam didn't want to hear anymore.

"Okay, I'll let it drop if you promise me one thing?"

"Cass-"

"Let him know Sam. He'll be there for you. I know he will."

"Life isn't a fairytale Cassie," Sam sighed, "Some things just weren't meant to be."

"It doesn't have to be fairytale perfect Sam. You just have to be happy."

Cassandra's words had struck home. She'd been trying to achieve fairytale perfection with Pete and along the way she had denied herself what made her truly happy. Not what, Sam thought, but who. Her Dad had hinted at the exact same thing but she had sunken too far into denial to acknowledge what he had been saying.

Sam got off the couch abruptly, heading into the bathroom. She'd clean it from top to bottom. Scrubbing until her Dad's words stopped repeating in her head. Are you happy Sam?

***

Sam had barely been on base fifteen minutes, just enough time to make it to her lab and boot up her computer, when General O'Neill strode into her lab and pushed the off button on her computer. He frowned when the computer didn't respond to his repeated jabbing of the off button.

"Carter, your computer is broken. It won't turn off."

Sam sighed and rolled her eyes, "I set my computer to deactivate the off switch unless I shut my computer down properly."

"Hmmm sensible Carter." Jack stopped pressing the button, "In that case shut it down properly and go home. You're meant to be on leave."

Sam suppressed a frown, the last thing she wanted to do was the leave the base for the emptiness of her home.

"I won't stay all day sir." Sam tried to bargain with him, "Just a few hours to settle a few things then I'll head home."

"Oh no Carter," Jack pushed again at the off switch and gave it a hopeful look, "A few hours will turn into a ten hour day complete with you skipping meals. Home. Now."

"Sir-"

"Carter you need time. Go home, relax, talk to your plants, see Pete, do wedding stuff," he paused and Sam realized he had seen her face blanch suddenly at the mention of Pete's name "Or not."

Sam made the announcement quickly before she had time to think through what she was saying, "Wedding is off. Pete and I… we're over."

Sam deliberately didn't look at Jack's face, choosing instead to stare down at her lab desk. A light touch on her shoulder wasn't enough to make her lift her face towards him and she was surprised when she felt a gentle hand under her chin. Startled she looked into Jack's face and was unprepared for his look of concern and care.

"Carter," he spoke softly, "I'm sorry."

Are you really? The words she wanted to say were restrained and instead Sam just nodded and looked away from the intense look on his face shifting his gentle touch from her chin.

"If it makes you feel any better Teal'c and I could go round and rough him up a bit?" his voice was still soft but it had a teasing edge that Sam knew wasn't entirely humorous.

"He's not the one who broke it off. I did."

"Hell of a bad week you've had Carter." His hand returned to her shoulder and he gave it a comforting squeeze.

Sam just shrugged not ready to fully process everything that was going on, "Bit of an understatement really."

Jack nodded, "Yes well. Anything I can do. All you have to do is ask."

"Let me stay on base?"

"Carter-"

"I'll call Teal'c and he'll make sure I have lunch. I'll be off base by 1700 and promise not to stay a minute longer just please don't make me go home." Sam's voice cracked as she spoke.

Jack gave her a long look, "Okay Carter. Call Teal'c and tell him lunch at 1200, I'll meet you both in the commissary. I'll be in your lab at 1655 to escort you to the surface."

Sam nodded in relief, "Yes sir."

"I guess break ups are the theme of the month aren't they Carter?" Jack lobbed the question at Sam as he left her lab.

She stared at the doorway for a moment after he left letting his words sink into her brain. I guess break ups are the theme of the month aren't they Carter? Could he possibly mean what she thought that meant? Sam shook herself from the thought, even he had meant that, it wasn't anything to do with her. The boundaries had existed between them before either of them had met Pete or Kerry. The fact that they were both single meant nothing. He was just as unattainable as he was eight years ago.

Get it through your head Sam, she thought furiously, you pushed him away, he isn't yours, he never was.

***

Sam waited outside the locker room for Daniel to emerge. His miraculous reappearance, naked, in General O'Neill's office had caused one shadow on her heart to lift. One of her best friends was back, alive and seemingly unharmed. He had excitedly started to tell the team about his ascended adventures before Jack had tapped him on the shoulder with his pen and said, "Clothes first, I can't take you seriously dressed in a flag."

Sam had followed Daniel to the locker room closely, ignoring the appreciative looks that Daniel attracted from passing SGC staff. Daniel, himself appearing to not realize the adoring looks he drew, babbled continuously also not appearing to notice Sam's quietness.

When he emerged from the locker room in familiar BDUs, the SGC flag draped over his arm, Sam smiled genuinely for what seemed like the first time in weeks. He seemed surprised to find her waiting for him but he simply smiled in return and continued to talk about Dakara as they walked towards the elevator.

The relative privacy of the elevator was just enough to break through Sam's desire to cry. Her father was dead and Pete was gone but she had Daniel back. She felt she had no right to feel such relief and happiness when everything in her life was so messed up. A tear slipped down her cheek and Daniel halted mid babble and placed a hand on her arm.

"Sam?" Daniel was frowning at her expression, "Everything okay?"

She stepped forward and hugged him tightly. Daniel's arm curled around her protectively not even hesitating to engulf her in a warm hug.

"It's been bad here lately that's all," Sam sniffed, "I really missed you."

Daniel pulled back slightly to look her in the face, "Oh? I'm sorry I wasn't here."

"Me too."

"How about we debrief with Jack and the others then you and I can go back to my place and drink a bottle wine. Each." he made the offer lightly but Sam could see the deeper concern in his eyes. She didn't often give displays of such emotion, let alone at work, so she knew that Daniel was aware of that something was seriously amiss.

Glad for the plan of company for the evening Sam nodded, "Sounds good."

***

Sam winced as the sunlight streamed through the open curtains and aggravated her pounding head. Daniel had been true to his word, he had brought her back to his apartment and plied her with wine. Daniel had held her tightly when she spoke of her Father and topped her empty glass with more wine when she recounted her break-up with Pete. It had been exactly what she needed. Despite the lingering hangover, Sam felt that at least some of the heavy weight that she'd been carrying had lightened somewhat.

Sam got out of bed, groaning as her stomach protested at the sudden change in gravity. It was 45 minutes later, after a long shower and a couple of advil, that Sam felt well enough to eat. She'd just sat down to test her stomach against some toast when a knock on the door interrupted the quiet of her home.

She opened the door to reveal a nervous looking Jack O'Neill standing on her front porch, dressed casually, swinging his keys around his finger.

"General." Sam pulled her worn sweatshirt down self consciously. She hadn't been expecting guests and was planning to change into her BDUs and head into the SGC as soon as she'd eaten.

"Carter," Jack grinned and moved past her into her house as she gestured him inside, "Thought I'd stop by on my way into work."

Sam glanced at the clock, "It's 1015, running a little late sir?"

Jack shrugged, "One little blemish on my record isn't going to hurt."

Sam rolled her eyes and smiled trying to conceal how uneasy she was of his presence in her home. She'd felt free last night when she talked with Daniel, but they hadn't touched upon the last burden on her conscience, Jack. She suspected Daniel knew of the tension between his two teammates, but it wasn't something they had ever discussed. She wasn't sure if it was because Daniel didn't approve or because he didn't realize how deep the feelings ran.

"So what can I do for you General?"

"Well since I assume you aren't going to take the rest of this week off like I ordered you too I thought I'd take the liberty myself to change your assigned leave to next week."

"What? Sir there's no need for me to take time off." Sam was puzzled, she thought she'd made it clear she had no desire to stay away from work. He knew work was her coping mechanism.

"Carter, you just lost your Dad," Jack's voice took on that gentle tone that made her insides flip, "Amongst other life changes. You need time away."

Sam felt the weight of spending a week alone crash down on her, "Sir, really I'm fine." She hoped he hadn't heard the tremor in her voice.

"I know it's hard to be…" Jack paused, looking uncomfortable, "alone, when things aren't… great. So the rest of us are taking leave too."

"The rest of…" Sam frowned, not understanding what he was saying.

"Daniel, Teal'c and I are on leave too as of Saturday."

Sam swallowed against the gratitude that swept through her, they weren't leaving her alone. Jack wasn't leaving her alone. After all she'd done, he was still there for her. Always.

"A week's leave huh? Any specific plans?" Sam didn't care if they planned to watch jello wrestling and bad scifi every day of the week so long as the guys were spending the time with her.

"I was thinking Minnesota actually," Sam could see the nerves Jack was trying to hide from her come back in full force as he started playing with his keys again, "Fishing. You and Me."

Sam tried to not let her mouth drop open in shock.

"And the team of course." Jack added hastily giving her a flustered grin.

It had been years since he'd asked her to go fishing. She had shot him down so many times he had just stopped asking. Stopped hinting at what was waiting for her when she was ready to drop the boundaries and go with him to Minnesota.

"That sounds perfect."

Jack grinned, "Excellent. I'll organize everything. All you have to do is pack."

"Okay, pack. I can do that." Sam tried in vain to move past the shock. She was going fishing. With Jack. In Minnesota.

"You can do anything Carter." Jack said the words affectionately and Sam knew he meant it, "I best be off. Walter's probably given himself a lethal paper cut in his panic at my out of character lateness."

"Of course Sir. I wouldn't want to be responsible for any further blemishes on your record."

Jack laughed as he let himself out the front door, Sam close behind. Just before he got clear of the porch Sam called him back.

"Sir?"

"Yes Carter?"

"Thank you. For being here, for everything" She hoped he understood what she wasn't saying. Thank you for not leaving me alone when I've done everything to push you away.

Jack walked forward and hugged her lightly in response. Sam sunk into his arms and shivered when he pressed a kiss to the top of head.

"Always Carter."

***

One more chapter to go.