Title: Never Easy

Rating: M overall

Pairing: Royxed, but mainly Elricest

Genre: Romance, Angst, Horror, Hurt/Comfort... that sounds like a terrible combination 0_0

Summary: Things have never been easy for the Elric Brothers. Why would love be any different?

Warnings: Mature content, language, and violence in later chapters.

Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with Fullmetal Alchemist. *sobs in corner*

Author's Note: Alrighty, just like promised, here's the next chapter. This one is a little longer than the last one, and I'm sorry if it ends sort of awkwardly; I couldn't find a good place to stop. Thanks to everyone who reviewed.

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"Brother, how many times do I have to tell you not to sleep with your stomach out? You're going to catch a cold like that!" Al asked, exasperatedly. He leaned over the side of the bed and shook me gently. "Brother… you have to wake up. It's already noon and the Colonel invited us over for dinner tonight, remember?"

I gurgled something incomprehensible as I tried to curl up tighter into a ball in the blankets. Al knew my tricks though. "No you don't!" he teased before whipping the blankets off the bed. It was somewhat cool in the room and I was just in my shorts. I groaned and flailed a bit in the bed. An evil plan popped into my head. "Al… you know what this means right?" I asked, laying on my side, my back still to him.

"…what?" he inquired timidly. I could pick up a little worry in his voice.

I paused for a long time, letting the tension build. Finally I yelled, "PAYBACK!" And at the same time, I flipped over and grabbed him by the waist, pulling him onto the bed. He was so taken off guard that he fell easily on top of me. Perfect. Before he could protest, I started tickling him relentlessly. He squeaked loudly and started to squeal nonsense words and feeble protests for me to stop between bouts of hysterical laughter. Oh, but I wasn't going to let him get out of this that easily. I flipped us over so that I was on top and in that better position, my fingers continued to tickle his sides and armpits. He was trying desperately to escape, but my legs held him pinned down. Finally, with tears rolling down his face and panting hard from laughing so hard, I decided that he suffered enough. I rested my hands on either side of his head and waited for him to catch his breath. After a few minutes, he calmed down, and with a smile on his face, he play-punched me in the ribs.

"You're a jerk. You know that right?" he said to me giggling.

"Of course, that's what big brother's do." I said in a matter of fact tone of voice. Al's face was flushed slightly and there was such joy in his eyes. His bangs hung slightly in his eyes despite the fact the rest of his hair was rather short; just like when we were kids. Before I knew what I was doing, I leaned down and placed a kiss on his forehead. He was just too cute. A look of surprise took over his face and I heard him gasp slightly.

"What the fuck Ed? Why would you do that? Damn! Uh—play it off cool! You got this!"

I got up off of him and strolled real smoothly over to the bathroom door, turning back right before I walked inside. Al leaned up on his elbows and looked at me quizzically. "And don't forget to make the bed Al," I said with a grin on my face. There were two beds in the dorm, one now in a jumbled disarray, and the other perfectly made. It looked like no one had slept in it at all last night… and that's because no one did. The first night that Al came back from the hospital, he had snuck into my bed in the middle of the night. I never said anything about it, and soon, it was just an unspoken agreement that Al would sleep in my bed as well. I didn't mind. In fact, I preferred it that way.

"Why do I have to make it? You're the one who was sleeping in it last Brother!" he fought back, but the smile had fallen back onto his face.

"That's true, but you're the one who threw the covers all onto the floor!" I teased back before closing the bathroom door. I could hear him giggling on the other side. I padded over to the sink and leaned over it, my head bowed. I sighed deeply, and then raised my head to look the in mirror. "What are you looking at?" I asked my reflection. It's never a good sign when you desperately want to kiss your younger brother AND start talking to yourself, so I took my toothbrush and did my daily hygiene routine, hoping that I could erase my crazy thoughts.

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The rest of the afternoon went by like any other day. Al and I went and got lunch at the cafeteria, talked to Fuery and Falman for a bit, and spent the rest of the time in the library, reading. When six rolled around, Al and I went back to our room and got ready for our dinner plans. We each took turns taking showers and Al fused over what I should wear, finally picking out a button down shirt that was in the back of our closet. I wouldn't have noticed if he picked out a clown suit for me to wear; I was too distracted with him standing there in just his towel, hair dripping onto his shoulder and running down his chest, further down his stomach where it finally meet the towel right by his hip—

"Brother, are you going to take the shirt, or just stand there all night?" he asked, tilting his head slightly. I blushed furiously and mumbled something as I took the clothes from his hand, turning away to get changed. Finally, at 6:30, Al and I went downstairs and outside on the front steps where Havoc was promptly waiting to drive us to Mustang's house. We got into the car and Al started to make polite chitchat with Havoc, talking about his day at work. I leaned my elbow on the window and rested my head in my hand, watching as the buildings slid by us. The sun was starting to set and the orange glow off the reflected windows made me think of that evening two months ago.

I had successfully brought Al's body back from the Gate. Both Al and I had been brought to the hospital. Surprisingly, he had woken up before me. Havoc had told me later that he had woken up, calling out for me, begging to see me. The nurses had to restrain him, and tell him that I was in a different room, resting. The next day, when I woke up, they moved me into the same room as him. I still remember seeing him for the first time in all those years…

I snapped out of my thoughts as the car pulled up to a small, two-story house on one of the streets in the more suburban-area of Central. It was sandwiched between two other almost identical houses, just like the rest of the street, except Roy's house was a light shade of gray-blue, unlike the others which ranged from an orange-y color, to gray, to a soft spring green. "The Colonel lives here?" Al asked as we got out of the car.

"Yup," I said casually. I thanked Havoc and wished him a goodnight. He nodded politely and then drove away, leaving Al and I on the sidewalk in front of the gate in the fence.

"I just never thought it would be so…homey I guess," he said, still looking up at the house. I had thought the same thing to myself the first time I saw his house too. Al didn't know it, but I had been to Mustang's house a few times before, but only once since Al got his body back. I frowned slightly at the thought, and Al happened to catch it.

"Are you okay Ed?" he asked softly, putting his hand on my shoulder.

"Of course," I said, forcing a smile onto my face. "It's just a little cold out here, is all." With that I opened the gate and we walked up to the front door. Al pushed the doorbell and we stood there in silence for a few moments. I could hear distant footsteps and soon the door opened. Roy stood there with a grin.

"Come on in you two," he urged, stepping back, letting us walk in. We took our shoes off and Al stepped into the hall, taking in the sight of the house. When Al wasn't looking, Roy leaned down and kissed me quickly on the lips. I was so shocked that I almost cried out. Thankfully I didn't, because then Al would have heard. Before I could shoot an angry look at Roy, he walked over to Al, showing him around to the study, saying he had some books that he thought we would be interested in seeing. I just stood there in front of the door. It was going to be a long night.

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Roy and I had begun dating almost right after Al and I moved into the dorms seven months ago. Al and I needed a place to stay so we could study and figure out how to use the Philosopher's Stone inside his body. One day, about a week after we settled in, Havoc came to our room and told me that Mustang wanted to see me in his office. It was just about five o'clock, so I figured he wanted to ask me about my latest report before he went home for the night. I told Al I would be back later, and made my way to his office.

I got to the door and noticed it was closed. I knocked, and almost expected there to be no answer. But instead, I heard Mustang call for me to come in. I stepped inside, and he told me to close the door. I strolled over to his desk and asked what he wanted with me. I tried to defend the honor of the report that I had scribbled down before handing in the day before, but Roy wasn't really listening. He stood up and walked around to the other side of his desk, just mere inches away, his face ridiculously close to mine. Before I could ask him what the fuck he was doing, he wrapped his hand around my neck, burying his hand in my braid and pulling me into a deep kiss. My body went rigid and I couldn't move. I couldn't push him off of me; I couldn't pull my face away from his. All I did was close my eyes and let him kiss me. It wasn't what I wanted, but after so long without physical contact from anyone, not even a hug, part of me was ecstatic from the attention. My hands reached up without my permission and grabbed a hold of his shirt, pulling him closer to me. My mouth opened slightly, letting him take control of the kiss and exploring my mouth. While my body told me yes, my heart ached with unbelievable pain.

I knew even then that I was undeniably in love with my brother Alphonse. I had become more and more aware of my feelings as we travelled across the country in search of the Philosopher's Stone. I always cared for my brother, but things began to change. Even in the suit of armor, I fell in love with him. Many sleepless nights, headaches, and tormented dreams later, I accepted that fact about myself. But, I could never, ever act on it. He was my brother. I had made him commit a horrible sin once, and I was never going to do that to him again. So I tried to bury my emotions inside with everything else.

But there I was, kissing Roy Mustang, my mentor, my boss, my pain in the ass 90% of the time, and I felt like I would scream. As he ran his gloved hands up my back, pulling my body completely against his, I gave in to his demands completely. I mean, my body had already decided almost right off the bat, but I decided that this was for the best. Maybe, if I tried hard enough, I could fall in love with this man. That way, I wouldn't be a burden to Al, so he could find someone else, so he could fall in love, so he could have a normal life. That was something that I could never give him. True, it would torture me watching Al with someone else, but that was just something that I was going to have to get used to.

Roy finally broke the kiss and lingered for a while, his forehead pressed against mine. My body was shaking. He noticed and pressed a kiss on my forehead. Then he took a step back and shuffled his feet sort of awkwardly. I think he was waiting for me to say something (probably some smart-ass remark), but I was speechless. I was completely torn. I let my heart break into a million pieces; the shards ripping through my chest causing never-ending pain. What happened next was going to have to be his move.

He looked into my eyes, and saw everything in an instant. He saw years of hidden struggles, anguish, and despair. He saw youth that was taken away and replaced with undeserved responsibilities. He saw a boy who was completely lost, and afraid that he would never be able to find his way again. And he saw a man who gave up on himself and his own happiness, broke his own heart, because sometimes pain caused by your own hand was easier to deal with than that caused by someone you loved. Roy Mustang saw all these things and decided that he wasn't going to stand by idly.

"Edward, I know that you have seen more pain in your years than you deserve, and I know that I can't possibly understand it all. But if you will let me, I can try to understand, and I can try to ease the darkness that you've been lost in. Just give me a chance."

Those were words I never expected anyone to say to me. I nodded my head. He leaned in and kissed me softly on the lips, and started working to piece those broken shards together again, one by one, even if they cut his hands while he did it.

When I finally got back to my room, Al was sitting on his bed, reading a book. The light from the lamp made his suit glow an almost orange color around the hard edges. He lifted his head when I entered, and he must have seen the frown on my face, because he immediately asked if I was alright.

"I'm fine Al. He just wanted to nag about my report," I lied. Without a second glance at Al, or waiting for a reply, I walked into the bathroom and shut the door. I took a shower for a long time, because with the water going, Al couldn't hear me cry.

Things are never easy.

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Author's Note: *dies from writing so much angst* Chapter 3 after another 2 reviews….. pwease? Peace.