All I could do was gape at the TV without seeing it.
My mother was dead. She had been taken away from me. Killed by someone who was too cowardly to own up to what he/she had done.
Before I was able to think of anything else, I heard a voice underneath me. I looked down and realized that the phone was on the floor. I bent over to get it.
"Hello? Bella? Are you there? Hello?!" the voice nearly shouted.
I didn't answer whoever it was. I forgot who I had even been talking to. I just pushed the "End" button and sat down.
Mom was gone. She would never come home. She would never hug me or kiss me or tell me that she loved me again. I would not see her face or spend time with her anymore. The smile that she gave me yesterday was the last one that I'd see that was not in a photo. The last time that we had fun would be the day she and I had went to the carnival.
I had no idea of how long I remained on the sofa. I was in a daze, too stunned to feel any other emotion besides shock. However, the next thing I knew, there was a loud knock on the door.
"Just a minute," I yelled. I walked over to the open it. Two cops were standing on the porch.
"Hello. Are you Isabella Marie Swan?" the one on my right queried. (That is my full name.)
I nodded. "Yes. If this is about my mother Renée, you don't have to tell me. I already know...I saw what happened on the news a while ago," I explained.
The other one pursed his lips. "Well, that gives us one less thing to do. My partner and I came to tell you that, and also to inform you that your mother has been taken to San Ricardo's Hospital. Do you need to be escorted there? Where is your father?" he inquired.
"He lives in Washington. My parents had divorced when I was three months old," I added when they frowned in bewilderment. "I'll have to call him soon. He will probably fly down here."
"Do you have anybody to stay with until then? Any other family members or friends?"
"Yes. Mom's boyfriend can look after me. His name is Phil Dwyer."
"Okay."
I grabbed my cell phone, keys, and a novel before rejoining the policemen. After sitting in the cruiser, they drove to the hospital. I called Phil on the way there.
He answered immediately. "Bella? Bella, why did you hang up on me?" he demanded.
I ignored his questions. "Sorry. Phil, I need you to meet me at San Ricardo's hospital," I stated in a dream-like voice.
"Why?"
Gulping thickly, I responded, "Mom is there. She was in a car accident."
There was a long pause. "I'm in my car now! Is Renée all right?! When did the accident happen?"
"After she left your place."
"But is she okay?"
I knew that I had to be honest with him, and I couldn't figure out how to. Stalling would cause him to be even more nervous, but telling him that Mom was dead right off would make the situation worse.
Phil spoke once more, interrupting my thoughts. "Bella, honey, please talk to me. Are you still there, baby?"
"Y-Yes. I'm here."
"Good. So, do you know how your mom is? Has anyone told you about her condition?"
"The news did. That was how I found out."
"And...? What did they say?"
I was going to have to tell him now. There was no way to keep the truth from him any longer.
"S-She's...Mom's dead, Phil. The person who crashed into her car ran the red light. He or she hit Mom's side of the vehicle and killed her. Then he or she just drove away. That's all I know," I concluded.
Phil went mute. All I could hear was the cruiser's engine.
"Dead? Renée is...dead?"
"Yes."
The next thing I knew, there was a click, followed by the sound of beeping. I hung up my cell phone. I felt too lifeless to call him back to make sure that he wasn't going to do anything drastic.
We arrived at San Ricardo's minutes later. One of the policemen-Deputy Landers-opened the door for me. I thanked him and followed him and Officer Quint into the building. They were speaking to a receptionist at the main desk when I noticed Phil approaching us. I sighed in relief. At least he physically okay.
"Bella!" he gasped, tears sliding down his cheeks. He embraced me and I hugged him in return. "Are you okay?"
"I don't know," I whispered. I honestly didn't.
Deputy Landers nodded to Phil when he moved away. "So you are the late Renée Swan's boyfriend Phil Dwyer," he declared.
"Yes," he confirmed.
"Miss Swan here told us that you could look after her until her father comes?"
He inclined his head. "She's right. I know that Renée would want me to if something happened to her."
Officer Quint pursed her lips. "I understand. Well, if you can take care of everything from here on out, my partner and I are going to leave. Don't forget to call your father, Miss Swan," he added, turning to me.
"I won't," I mumbled.
The policemen shook our hands, telling us that they were sorry for our losses. Then we bid each other good-bye.
After Phil had a talk with the receptionist, he and I sat in the waiting area. Neither us really spoke. I was in shock, and he was too distraught. He mostly wept quietly into one hand as he rubbed my back with the other.
Fifteen minutes later, a male doctor came in the room. "Phil Dwyer and Isabella Swan?" he announced.
We stood up.
"Here we are," Phil remarked, wiping his face.
The doctor gave a tiny, sympathetic smile. "Hello. My name is Dr. Korvin. I believe that you are both here for Renée Swan?" he queried.
"Mm-hmm," Phil replied.
Dr. Korvin waved his clipboard. "Follow me, please."
Phil slid his arm around me as we trailed after him. I lost track of the number of corridors we passed through before we had entered the morgue.
The doctor led us to a body bag in the corner of the room. "I have to warn you that Renée had been significantly injured. It is likely that she had died instantly or almost instantly due to the trauma in her skull and brain. Her left arm, left leg, and five ribs were broken or fractured. Do you still wish to view her?"
Phil choked on a sob. "I don't know. I don't know if I can stand to see my baby in that condition." He looked at me. "Bella, do you want to?"
"Yeah, I guess," I responded in an empty voice.
He nodded to Dr. Korvin, who opened the bag to reveal Mom. The left side of her body was mangled, but the right side was untarnished.
I leaned over to kiss the cheek that wasn't bruised and hugged her. "I wish that I had the chance to say one last good-bye to you. I miss you so much already. I know that I always will. I hope that wherever you are, you are happy. I love you, Mom."
Phil also kissed and embraced her. He said something to her, but I couldn't hear it because he was whispering. Then he gave her one last kiss, and I did too.
Dr. Korvin zipped up the bag. "I know that this must be a difficult time for the both of you. If either of you want to talk to someone, I know a grief counselor here who will be more than glad to help you," he stated.
We inclined our heads.
"Is there anything else that I may do for you? What do you wish to do with Renée?"
"You should ask Bella. She is her daughter and only kin," Phil pointed out.
Dr. Korvin raised his eyebrows at me questioningly.
"I want to have a funeral for her. Mom would want it."
"Okay. We will prepare her for one, then."
After they had exchanged a few more words, Phil drove to my house. The trip went by quickly because I was in my own world. We were parking in front of the garage before I knew it.
I opened the door and sat on the couch. Phil laid his hand on my arm.
"Bella, you should call Charlie now. I'm going to fix lunch," he remarked.
"Sure."
I took my cell phone out and dialed Charlie's number. He answered it on the third ring.
"Hi Bella! I was just thinking of you!" he exclaimed.
"Hey, Dad," I greeted lifelessly.
My voice caught his attention immediately. "Bella, what's wrong?" he queried.
Unable to find a way to break the news to him gently, I simply responded, "Mom died late this morning. She was in a car accident. The person who crashed into her vehicle just drove off."
Charlie was mute for a long time. I had started to wonder if the call had disconnected when he finally spoke.
"Oh, my God. I...I can't believe it. Do you want me to come there? I will if you need me to," he added.
"Yeah. It will probably be better if you did. I might be told that I have to stay with you until I'm eighteen. Plus, I'll need help with the funeral arrangements."
"I understand. I will try to get the next available flight out of Port Angeles. You holding up okay?"
"I guess. I don't know," I repeated.
"Are you by yourself?"
"No. Phil is here with me."
He exhaled deeply. "All right. I'll see you soon, baby. Just hang in there for me. When I arrive in Phoenix, I'll call you."
"Okay. Love you."
"Love you too, Bella." Click.
Phil eventually returned with chicken noodle soup. I ate mine mechanically, not tasting one spoonful.
The rest of the day passed in a blur. I could never quite remember much of what happened during the afternoon and evening hours. I just sat on the couch, not moving or talking unless Phil spoke or asked me a question.
He spent half of the time crying while stroking a picture of Mom. At other times, I noticed him watching me out of the corner of my eyes. He was probably afraid that I would snap or break down without warning. I didn't blame him.
Gradually, the sky grew darker until it was completely black. Phil turned on the lamp.
Charlie called me around 11:30 to let me know that he was in a hotel not far from my place. He would come in the morning since it was too late to right then.
After hanging up, I drifted to my bedroom and changed into my nightclothes. Then I turned on the air conditioner and laid on my bed.
I didn't know whether or not I slept. The haze that surrounded me when I found out that Mom was killed had lingered. It probably did in my dreams too, if I had any.
XXX
When I stepped into the kitchen the next morning after getting dressed, Phil was already there cooking breakfast. He looked as if he hadn't slept. Shadows were under his dull eyes.
"Hi Bella," he grunted.
"Hey," I returned quietly, sitting at the table.
A plate of eggs and bacon was laid in front of me within a couple of minutes. I wasn't hungry, but I tried to eat so that I would hurt his feelings. Besides, Mom wouldn't want me to starve myself.
It took time, but I managed to eat all of my food. Phil stacked the plates, cups and silverware in the dishwasher. I left to watch TV in the living room, but I ended up staring into space until my cell phone rang. It was Charlie.
"Morning, honey. I'm about to be on my way to your place now. Listen for my knock," he added. (He knew where I lived. He had visited Mom and I here before.)
"Okay. Be careful," I warned.
"I will. See you soon."
"Bye."
He hung up.
I glanced at Phil. "Dad's coming," I stated.
"All right. Will you be staying with him?" he inquired.
Shrugging, I replied, "Maybe. I don't know. Do you think that it would be better if I did?"
He pursed his lips. "I don't know either."
Fifteen minutes later, I heard a car pull up outside. I opened the door when Charlie knocked. We embraced one another tightly after saying hello.
"I'm here now, baby. I'm here," he whispered, kissing my temple.
Then he let me go to shake Phil's hand. "Hi. I'm Charlie. You must be Renée's boyfriend, Phil. Thank you for looking after my daughter."
"Yes. It's nice to meet you, Charlie. And it was no trouble."
After that, time just seemed to fly. Charlie and Phil almost immediately started the funeral preparations for Mom. I was still too out of it to pay attention to any of what was said. But I did help them with the flowers because I knew which ones she had liked. Tiger lilies, red and pink roses, daisies, and blue asters. They managed everything else: the funeral costs, the casket, the obituaries, the headstone, a grave at a nearby cemetery, etc.
They both had more than enough cash for all of the expenses. (They both had well-paying jobs.) In fact, Charlie gathered half of the money while Phil dished out the rest of it. They paid everything once their loot was together and Mom's funeral was scheduled for the day after tomorrow at 11:00am. The viewing was at 10:00am.
We called her friends to let them know about what happened, and when the funeral was. Many of the began to cry as soon as we told them the news. I couldn't blame them. All of her friends truly liked/loved her.
I was completely numb for the entire time. All I could do was stare into space. Phil wasn't the only one keeping an eye on me now; Charlie was too. They often whispered to each other while turning to gaze at me. I would have found this irritating if my emotions hadn't been muted. I detested it when people looked at me over and over again.
The only time I ate was if Phil cooked for us. Otherwise, I didn't remember that I needed to. I still never knew if I slept either.
Charlie went to the hotel that evening to check out and returned with a overnight bag. Phil decided to go back to his place. He showed up the next day to help out with the arrangements.
XXX
I got out of bed early on the morning of the funeral. I took a shower, then put on the black dress that I had laid out. Then I joined Charlie and Phil in the kitchen for breakfast. They were already wearing their suits.
At nine thirty, we left for Saint Monica's Funeral Parlor. We arrived there ten minutes later.
Reverend Granger was in the lobby when we entered the building. He greeted us cordially, and when we shook his hand, I did so absentmindedly. I vaguely noticed Phil laying the obituaries on the table.
Every one of Mom's friends showed up, as well as some of her old students and their parents. (Mom had been a Kindergarten teacher.) The people who knew me either patted my arm, hugged me, or offered words of sympathy or comfort. However, I was too withdrawn to do anything but nod.
Just about everyone cried during the viewing, and even more so when the funeral was held. Charlie himself had gotten a little teary-eyed. Phil wept enough for both of us, though.
Before I knew it, Reverend Granger was announcing that we may come up to pay our respects to Mom.
Nearly everyone stayed in their seats; they were crying too hard to get a word out. Some of her friends were able to, though. We listened as they told us stories that involved Mom. Others just came up to say that they will always miss and love her.
Charlie and Phil also shared a few precious memories of her.
"I remember the day that I met Renée less than nineteen years ago clearly. She was the most beautiful and interesting woman that I had ever known. We got to know each other, and it wasn't long before we started dating. Renée and I quickly fell in love after that.
"Then something unexpected happened. She became pregnant with Bella, our daughter. I proposed to her because I felt that it was the right thing to do. Our engagement only lasted a month, and then we were married.
"Unfortunately, things didn't turn out as well as I hoped it would. Renée hated living in Forks. She wasn't used to living where it was cloudy and rainy nearly all of the time. She tried to brighten my house up by painting my wooden furniture yellow. Being pregnant didn't help matters either. She grew depressed, and she wasn't too happy with me for trapping her in a place that rarely had sunshine. Plus, she didn't know anybody in town," Charlie explained.
He stopped talking for a moment to wipe his eyes. "I tried to make things better for her, but it didn't work. She eventually left and took Bella with her. She had wanted me to go with her, but I refused to because of my job. I'm the Chief of Police at home. Anyway, we filed for a divorced and had it finalized more than a year later. We still loved each other, but knew that our relationship just wasn't meant to be.
"In spite of this, Renée and I were still very good friends. We often talked, usually because of our daughter. We made sure that we were all doing okay.
"The last time that I spoke to Renée before she died was three weeks ago. She also mailed Bella's report card two weeks after that. She was telling me how happy she was with her life and how proud of her daughter she was. She mentioned that her relationship with Phil was going great too. Every time I think of it, all I hope was that she was feeling just as happy before she died. I know that she is just as happy in heaven. She led a wonderful life and was an amazing person. So Renée, if he can hear me, I just want you to know that I'm going to miss you. You were the best friend that anyone could have. Love you."
Everybody applauded as Phil stood in front of the casket. He waited until it was quiet to speak.
"Charlie is right. Renée was an extraordinary woman. She loved everyone. She was intelligent, creative, fun to be around. She was thoughtful and cared about people who were less fortunate than she was. And God, she was perceptive. I swear that she knew what somebody was like ten minutes after she met them. That was probably why she chose to date me.
"I didn't know Renée for as long as most of you have, but I felt as if I had known her all my life. I fell deeply in love with her quicker than I expected to, but I didn't consider it a bad thing. I had planned to ask her to marry me before the year was over. But now...but now, I c-can't. I wish that I had proposed to her sooner. Maybe her life would had gone down a different path, then. However, I am not capable of going back in time. And I would if I had the ability to. I only hope that wherever Renée is, she knows how much I love her. I miss her so much. We all do, I'm sure. Goodbye, Renée. I wish that I had more time to be with you. I love you, darling, and I pray that you are happy," he stated.
The audience clapped, and I went up to say my good-byes to Mom.
I nodded in the direction of the front pew on the left. "Everything that my dad and Phil said about Mom is true. But every one of you know this already. And besides all of that, she was the best mother in the world. She was always there for me when I needed her. She listened to me if I had to talk to her about anything. She comforted me when I was angry or sad. And she picked a couple of days in the week for us to go out and have fun. It seemed like we were always having fun, even at home. She was not a good cook most of the time, but she did make exceptional lasagne, pot roast, roast chicken, and turkey.
"Our very last outing was at the carnival last Friday. Mom got on every ride and played all of the games. She was always one of those people who would try anything as long as it was worthwhile and/or not dangerous. But she didn't know what was half of the time, so I often had to tell her.
"While she and I were eating popcorn, Mom was telling me about how much she was enjoying herself. She also went on about how she wanted to continue being happy. She had me, things were going perfectly with Phil, and she enjoyed every moment teaching her Kindergarten students.
"I know for a fact that most, if not all of them, will remember her forever. As a teacher, Mom did her best to influence her students positively. I'm sure she did.
"The only thing that I wish is that Mom had more time to be with us...to be with me. I miss her so badly, even though I'm too dazed to feel any particular emotion. But that doesn't mean that I don't mean it. I really do miss her. I would say that I wish that she could go on being happy, but I know that she is in heaven as much as she was here on Earth, if not more," I declared.
I turned to look at Mom's coffin. "I will always love you and keep your memory alive. And I will continue you make you proud as often as possible. Enjoy yourself in heaven. I know that you will be watching over me up there. Good-bye, my dearest mother."
Once the applause had died down, Reverend Granger finished the sermon. Then we all drove to the cemetery.
The crowd assembled at Mom's grave in due time. The reverend quoted a verse from his Bible and recited a prayer. After Mom's old students released the doves, we placed our flowers on the casket.
Finally, Mom was laid to rest. I handled it better than I thought I would; I had wondered if I was going to break down at last. Phil cried silently, tearing rolling down his face. Charlie buried his in his hands.
Nearly everyone else wept louder and stormier. I had to cover my ears.
The casket let out a dull thud as it reached the bottom of the grave. Charlie and Phil spoke to Reverend Granger for a bit. After that, we took one more look at the grave before leaving the cemetery.
XXX
I spent the next day packing my clothes and other important belongings. I was going to live with Charlie for a while.
Mom had left everything to me in her will. I decided to keep most of it in storage, but I was going to take some of it with me. I gave whatever else I didn't want to Charlie and Phil. When I mentioned that I would sell the house, Phil offered to buy it from me.
"You might want to come back and visit it one day," he pointed out.
I just nodded vaguely.
So he purchased the house after it was sold. We looked through it one last time, and after I had bidden it a silent farewell, Charlie put my bags in the trunk of his rental car. Then we said good-bye to Phil.
"I'm going to miss you, Bella. Please call me sometime and let me know how you are doing," he murmured as we hugged each other.
"I will. You can also call me. I'm gonna miss you too," I added.
Charlie shook his hand. "Thanks again for looking out for Bella before I came, and for helping out with the funeral. I am very grateful to you for that."
Phil waved his hand. "Don't mention it. I was glad to lend you a hand. Good luck with everything."
"Thanks. Same to you."
I embraced Phil one more time before getting in the rental car. Charlie and I waved to him before we drove away. Our flight to Port Angeles was at 12:29pm, and it was 9:03am.
When we arrived at the airport, Charlie piled my suitcases on the luggage cart. We had ourselves scanned before getting our bags taken care of.
The waiting room was quiet. Not many people in Arizona traveled to Washington. I just sat in my chair without talking. Charlie read a newspaper, glancing at me every once in a while to make sure that I was okay.
Our plane came right on time. I slung my backpack onto my shoulders and waited in line. Charlie and I handed a man our tickets, and we boarded the plane. Pretty soon, we were taking off.
I spent most of the three-hour flight gazing blindly at a novel. However, I turned the pages so that Charlie wouldn't worry. He decided to have a nap after some time. At 2:10 PST (time moved back an hour since we were in a different time zone), the flight attendant announced that the plane was about to land soon. I woke Charlie up to let him know.
We landed in Port Angeles safely. Charlie and I collected our things and got off the plane.
Luckily, it did not take forever for our suitcases to come. They usually did. We took them to his police cruiser that was in the reserved parking lot.
The ride to Charlie's house lasted an hour or so. Once there, we carried my suitcases up to my bedroom that I used to sleep in for only three weeks a year. I would be using it for a longer period of time now that I lived with Charlie.
I spent the rest of the afternoon putting my stuff away and cooking dinner. I wasn't really hungry. I had forgotten what it was like to be hungry since Mom had died. But I made myself eat all of the food that was on my plate. Charlie devoured his meal as if he were starving.
After he and I were finished, I washed the dishes. He headed to the living room to watch TV. I drifted upstairs to my bedroom presently to rest. The next thing I knew, I fell asleep.
(Later)
I woke up when it was dark. It was so dark, in fact, that I didn't know where I was for a couple of minutes.
My eyes soon adjusted to the black expanse surrounding me. There was an outline of a drawer to my right, with a desk on the other side of it. A chair was in the far left corner of the room. A bookshelf, also on my left, was closer to the bed. One window was in front of me, and another was to the left of the bookshelf. A clock that was on a nightstand behind me on the right said 11:41. All was still and silent.
That was when I remembered that I was now living in Charlie's house.
And then the events of the past crashed into my thoughts.
Finding out that Mom had been killed...
Seeing her lifeless form in the morgue...
The funeral and burial...
My eyes finally welled up with the tears of grief and sorrow that had evaded me for so long. I hid my face in the pillow and wept with heartbroken sobs. Mom was dead and I would never get her back. I would never see her again.
Charlie had obviously heard me because he came into the room seconds later. The bed dipped as he gathered me in the arms. I cried into his neck while he rocked me and stroked my hair.
"Shh, shhhh. Everything will be okay, honey," he whispered in a gentle voice.
"I can't believe that somebody would t-take my mom away from m-me-eee," I hiccuped.
He kissed the top of my head. "I know, and whoever did it will be found someday. Wait and see. Just let it out. You've been holding it in for a long time. That's my girl."
(A/N: PLEASE REVIEW! I had gotten so sad in the end that tears filled my own eyes. :'( Let me know what you think. Carlisle will be in the next chapter, and if not, definitely chapter four :) Oh, and I changed the story summary to say "nomadic vegetarian vampire.")