Hey everyone, so I get that this isn't how Purgatory and everything actually went down, but it's an au so it doesn't need to be exact. Thanks so much for reading, concrit is greatly appreciated :)
It's times like this when I need you
And I can't get no
Give me space and I will give you time
"So we're waiting for a platoon of fifty men to report back to us from scouting in those mountains four kilometres west of us." Dean informed his angel, who was standing next to him.
Dean was sitting on a box full of supplies, cleaning his rifle, and Cas stood next to him, personal space being as nonexistent as it once was. Sam was standing at the entryway of the tent, absentmindedly scrubbing a pair of boots that could've used a better cleaning, and Benny was outside, on the lookout with Gwen. They all felt good, like they used to when they worked. The world was changing to a new normal, a pleasant one that the family could finally enjoy.
"And what exactly are they scouting for?" Cas' deep voice seemed to make the air vibrate, a feeling Dean sorely missed.
"According to the boss, terrorists. Reports are vague, they only say 'suspicious activity,' but I can hack into the top secret files and see if they have any more info." Sam said with a shrug.
"No need." Dean assured him. "Nothing on any radars, I'm betting it's just a soldier's overactive imagination. Scary mountains, new kid who just left home, it all adds up."
"Well you're about to find out if you're right." Benny walked in, raising a brow upon seeing how close Cas stood to Dean. "We can see them in the distance, they're coming over. They've radio'd the okay, but we still need to do a full report."
"'Radio'd the okay.'" Dean smirked at his brother. "Told you it's all good."
"Fine, smart ass. But Benny and I'll be out with the rest of the troops to welcome them anyway." He set down his boots and started making his way out.
"Should we be helping?" Dean asked, reassembling his gun and sitting slightly straighter, though not being in the mood to work.
"Nah, we'll uh, we'll give you two some privacy." Sam exited, and Dean felt very unsettled when Benny winked before doing the same.
He looked to Cas, who smiled slightly, something he rarely saw but very much appreciated.
"You've been cheerful lately." He said, pushing a box closer to him. Cas, understanding, sat stiffly.
"I am cheerful. Escaping Purgatory, seeing you and Sam again, it's all been great." He smiled again, but Dean couldn't bring himself to return it.
"Cas...I thought you were dead. We didn't see any other angels over there, so Benny and I thought that they were all...food." Dean choked out the words, guilt weighing upon each one.
"No, they're just good at hiding. But as luck would have it, I lived." Cas looked to the ground grimly.
"But I don't care about those other angels, I care about you. I just wanna say I'm sorry, Cas. If I knew you were alive, being tortured, I would've stayed and looked for you. No matter how long it took, I would've found you again." Dean could feel a lump forming in his throat, but he swallowed hard, never one for displaying too much emotion.
"You never would have found me. Or the Leviathan would have killed you." Cas stated. "Dean, you have nothing to apologize for. As I've said in the past, I would rather you leave Purgatory safe than be killed over me. And, looking at the situation, it certainly seemed like I was a goner."
"Yeah, but you're a survivor, Cas. A hero." Dean clapped him on the shoulder, his hand lingering as they stared at each other.
"Your hero?" He asked, and there was something foreign in his eyes, an odd combination of sadness, hope, and nostalgia.
"Yeah. My hero." Dean answered, knowing his hand was still on Castiel's shoulder. The tent seemed darker and smaller, and suddenly he felt as though the air was warmer and pressing harder against them. But he knew what he was feeling, he knew it wasn't supernatural. Attraction, pulling him to his angel. He began to lean closer.
"Dean?" Cas edged slightly closer to him, reaching out a hand to graze the one not touching his shoulder, sending a tingle like electricity through Dean's fingers.
"Yeah?" Their legs were touching, foreheads inches apart, voices soft.
"This - I don't -" Their noses bumped. Cas had already closed his eyes, and through Dean's squinted gaze he could see the sweat shining on his skin, count every eyelash.
"Shut up." Dean whispered, and tilted his head.
The sudden bang of a gunshot interrupted them from going any further, followed by another, and then a dozen others. A woman's scream filled the air, and they both sat back staring at each other, momentarily shocked.
"Dean!" Sam's yell for his brother was what called them to attention once more, and Dean picked up his gun as he ran out of the tent, Castiel close behind.
"Sammy!" Dean yelled in response, then stopped dead in his tracks as he examined the scene before them. The other soldiers, the platoon who'd been out scouting in the mountains, were firing their guns, straight at their fellow troops, who were scrambling to defend themselves. The sudden betrayal, though, was easily made clear to Dean and his friends: their eyes were cold and black. Demons were attacking.
"Dean!" Sam called out again, and Dean turned to see him throwing holy water onto a man in front of him, steam rolling off his skin as he shrieked in agony.
Without another word, Dean pulled Ruby's knife from his boot, where he always kept it, and started slashing, not even wincing as blood splattered on his face and uniform and bodies fell around him, glowing as the demons shrieked and died. From the corner of his eye, he could see Cas, destroying the demons with a hand to their foreheads and a blast of bluish light. Around them, their fellow troops, who'd learned enough about the other men's hunting to defend themselves, were firing salt rounds and tossing holy water everywhere they could as Cas and Dean skillfully and quickly killed, until 49 bodies littered the ground. Only one demon lived, and he was thrown quickly into the tent, where a Devil's Trap was already prepared on the impromptu thin wooden floor.
There was a silence as the troops looked at the dead, the people who were possessed. They would spend many nights wondering who could've been saved, if they could've been, despite Sam, Dean, and Castiel's assurance to them all that there was just no way to excorsice mid-battle, assurance that was only half believed by all those involved. Finally, after the chaos, as they all began to clean up, Samuel pulled the two brothers aside, Cas naturally tailing after Dean, and Benny leaning in out of curiosity.
"Why did you let him live?" He asked in an almost demanding tone, but Dean answered unfazed.
"Fifty demons attacking isn't normal, Samuel, something's up." Dean looked around at the corpses surrounding them, watching the sand become stained with their blood.
"We can question this one, find out what's going on." Sam continued, glancing back at the tent. "Whatever it is, it's trouble. Big trouble."
"Come on." Cas reached out and grabbed Dean by the elbow, their moment in the tent seemingly not forgotten. "Do you have the knife?"
Dean held it up, and Cas nodded solemnly. "Good. I don't think this will be easy."
"Never is." Sam agreed, and the three of them walked into the tent, Benny staying behind with the bloody bodies.
The demon was possessing a young man, only around twenty years old, with a wiry body and a tired looking face. He leered at them angrily from his position, tied to a folding chair, as Sam and Dean slowly walked around him, while Cas stood straight and examined him, staring him directly in the eyes.
"Castiel." The demon smirked. "The fucked up fallen angel."
The sound of flesh hitting flesh resonated in their ears as Dean reached out and punched him, causing blood to drip from his mouth. The demon smiled as Dean stepped back, a grim look of worry causing his brow to tense.
"And his lover. Odd that it's you and not Sam. Castiel's so close to becoming the next Lucifer, after all." Dean hit him again, harder, and he cracked his neck, his smile growing.
"What do you mean, the next Lucifer?" Sam looked curious and a little on edge, though he fought to keep the worry hidden from his eyes.
"Killed all his brothers. Crowley's not the biggest fan. Adds up."
"He's nothing like Satan, you giant shit stain. What's your name? Why are you here?" Dean spat at him, looking down at him like he was the world's ugliest bug.
"As to the first, they call me Amon. As to the second; you think I'm telling you?" The demon snarled, enjoying the drama.
"Yes, I do. Dean's pretty good with interrogation, you see." Cas said to him, eyes boring into his, and Dean felt a stab of discomfort, despite knowing Cas was complimenting him in his own odd way.
"So I've been told. He did learn in the best place." Amon smiled, full of mirth at the thought of causing any bit of pain to these people.
Dean shifted uncomfortably before hitting the monster again, but he noticed the movement and laughed at the man. Luckily, so did Castiel, and though his understanding of emotion was poor, he understood Dean, and decided to help.
"Dean?" Cas coarsely said his friend's name as he moved to punch the demon again. "Why don't you take your brother and go outside. I've got this one." When Dean raised an eyebrow, Cas stepped over to him and touched his back, leaning over to whisper in Dean's ear.
"Let me do this for you." The angel whispered, and they locked eyes for a moment. Dean's were slightly wet with tears of gratitude, and he swallowed, then nodded solemnly.
"C'mon, Sammy." He walked towards the entrance of the tent, little brother in tow, when he stopped, turned, and looked at Cas, who was removing his angel blade from his pocket, then to demon again. "I actually feel sorry for you."
And he and Sam left Castiel to his work.
Outside, Sam and Dean locked eyes with Benny, standing next to Samuel and a large pile of bodies. Stepping closer, they both felt their stomachs clenching, staring at the blood soaked soldiers, each with pale faces full of terror. Their blood was everywhere, turning nearly every inch of the sand around them a deep red. This was the most gory battle they'd ever seen, the one with the most life lost. The pain of this realization was dull and numbing though; they'd seen too much to be properly scarred anymore.
"So we're thinking we should bury them." Samuel began as the brothers approached him. "Burning would get picked up by the drones."
A scream rang out from the distant tent, tone wavering due to a presumably large amount of pain.
"If we're making it look like someone else did this, we should just leave them." Sam countered, ignoring it. "Like a warning."
Dean opened his mouth to agree, when another scream pierced the air, this one far more animalistic.
"We'll have to, we can't pass this off as friendly fire." Dean motioned to the soldiers, trying not to look at their pallid, unseeing eyes, still open and seemingly staring at them all.
"Well," Benny began as more screams were heard, this time sounding hoarse, "luck is actually in our favor for once. There's a storm coming tonight; we just need to pack up and move and the sand will cover up our tracks."
"What about our DNA? It's gotta be all over the place." Samuel, for the first time, revealed how nervous he was, with his hands wringing and his voice wavering so slightly the others barely detected it. He was tough, but watching 50 people die was too much.
For a moment there was only screaming.
"It's on record that they radio'd the okay from the mountains to someone." Sam said at last. "Maybe we met with them for a few minutes, they acted a little off, and something bad happened after we left. Maybe they were just threatened to act alright. It's...just a shame we didn't notice."
"Are you serious?" Benny asked loudly, astounded.
"That's a pretty big cover-up, Sam. Like, some political bullshit." Dean raised his brow, pondering the chances of getting away with it.
"But we don't really have a choice, do we." Sam turned away from the bodies, looking at the cloud-covered horizon.
"No." Samuel sighed. "We don't. Let's pack up, move out before the storm hits. We'll report briefly meeting with the soldiers, and nothing else."
He walked towards the rest of the troops, all of whom looked uneasy and ill. No doubt the plan would perturb them.
"Are you okay, Benny?" Dean asked, and Sam turned around to examine him. "Holding it in near all this blood?"
"I got my fill when y'all were interrogating our new friend earlier." He replied. "And I already bagged as much as possible."
A sudden sound of ruffled feathers stopped their conversation from being continued, and they turned to see Castiel standing a few inches behind Dean, his familiar trench coat soaked in blood. Subconsciously, they all noted that the screams had ended.
"He's ready to talk." He said to Dean, who stood comfortably close to him. "But just to the two of us."
"Why?" Sam asked, confusion clear on his face.
Castiel's answer was grim. "Entertainment."
"I actually feel sorry for you."
Dean and Sam left the tent, leaving the angel with the demon. Castiel stared at him quizzically, and Amon just shrugged.
"So Dean Winchester feels sorry for me." He clicked his tongue. "I guess you're pretty good at torturing, then."
"Yes, I am." Castiel replied. "Would you like to tell me what you know now, before I stab you in the face?"
"Nah, I'll see what I can handle." He said with a smirk.
"Alright then." Cas said, and wasting no time, raised his arm, angel blade in hand. Bringing it down, he stabbed Amon straight in the eye, causing him to yell out in pain as viscous fluid dripped down his cheek. He pulled the blade from his eye, the first two inches of the tip covered in blood. Crouching down, he held the blade in front of the demon, as to get a view of his reflection. "Looks good."
"I can get a cool eyepatch." Amon said with a toothy grin.
"Then I'll ruin some nicer features." Castiel stood up once more. "Shall we start with the teeth, or your penis?"
The smile faded from Amon's face.
"We'll start with the teeth." Cas said, and Amon noticeably relaxed. "I really don't want to be in contact with that."
"Saving yourself for a certain hunter?" The demon smirked, and Castiel pulled out his demon blade, stabbing it into his gums. Wriggling the blade from side to side, he grabbed the demon by the chin to steady him as he shouted. He pushed the knife up under his left canine, and twisting and turning the blade, he carved the tooth out, blood spilling into the demon's mouth. Cas put down the blade and picked the loosely hanging tooth from his gums, examining it.
"Teeth are boring, now that I think of it." Castiel said, tossing it aside. "Dean would call this kind of torture 'cliche'. He did when I suggested it once on Alastair, did you know him?"
Amon groaned in pain and spat out a mouthful of blood, looking at Cas with faint annoyance.
"Yeah. Boring. I'll rip out your tonsils instead."
Amon's eyes widened in alarm as Castiel stepped forward, their legs smashing together, and punched him straight in the nose, breaking it with a disturbingly loud crack. He yelled out in surprise, and the angel took his opportunity to shove his hand into his mouth, a popping sound from the Amon's dislocating jaw reverberating in his now oversized mouth. Cas grabbed some tissue, gripped firmly, and started tearing, pulling out hunks of dripping muscle and tendon through the demon's mouth, reaching in and taking more.
Amon screamed at the top of his lungs, repeatedly, with blood increasingly spurting out of him and making him sound garbled. His throat became hoarse with both screaming and being literally torn apart by another's hand, and tears were streaming down one of his cheeks as the other one of his eyes had been destroyed.
"Okay! Okay!" He screamed just before Castiel could put his hand back in his mouth. They were both covered in blood, and teeth littered the floor.
Cas released a pulpy bit of flesh, letting it fall to the ground and spatter its juices on his shoes. Amon muttered something unintelligible, then tried saying it again, still failing.
"What?" Cas squinted. "Now I can't understand you. If I heal you, will you still talk?"
The demon nodded, and although Castiel didn't quite trust that, he placed two fingers on his forehead, effectively healing his throat, fixing his teeth, and recreating his damaged eye.
"I'll only talk if Dean Winchester is here to listen, too. Just the two of you." Amon said as he gyrated his newly healed jaw.
"Why?" Castiel asked, confused.
"Entertainment."
Castiel and Dean walked into the tent, looking down at the demon in the chair who was no longer smiling.
"He looks the same." Dean pointed out.
"I healed him." Cas responded. "I couldn't understand what he was saying."
"The torturing was actually quite impressive." Amon interjected, sounding almost bored.
"I acted like you. I sounded clever and everything." Castiel said, and for a moment he beamed.
Dean looked at him with fondness for a moment, then cleared his throat. "So, why did Crowley send down MASH to cause so much trouble?"
"What a terrible pop culture reference, Dean, you could've put more effort into that." Amon stretched and yawned.
"You said you would talk." Castiel said, his words sharp. "I can torture you again if that's a problem."
"Fine. I'll talk. But just so we're clear, the MASH thing makes me Hawkeye." He sat straighter, looked at them both, and smiled.
"Why did you come here?" Dean asked, his voice low and threatening.
"Crowley sent us." He answered. "We have people watching out for trouble in the nearby towns and villages, they happened to notice an old friend in a trench coat. The boss wasn't exactly happy you were back. Sure, you took out the leviathan, but let's not forget all the shit you did in the good ol' days."
"So you were sent to kill me." Castiel verified.
"No." The demon leaned in, face full of malice. "We were sent to kill him."
And his eyes darted to Dean, who stood there, brows raised.
"What, so now the Leviathan are gone, it's back to hunting down the Winchester brothers?" Dean questioned. "Not a big plot twist there, pal."
"No, moron, we didn't give two fucks about you until the angel came back. Want to break a little kid? You take his toy away. Want to break a man? Do the same to the person he loves."
Dean and Cas stared at each other, fear easy to see in their eyes.
"He's in love with you, Dean, and we all know that love is a disadvantage." Amon smiled proudly, so above them all in his own mind. He was only evil, and from that evil sprouted greed, hatred, arrogance. He couldn't remember what love felt like.
Dean reached out and smacked him, feeling the blood drain from his face as he saw the demon's cheek turn red. He felt cold and small, scared to death for the first time since Cas 'died' in Purgatory. Cas leaned over, inches from Amon's face, and Dean saw his fists clenched and shaking, something he'd never seen from Cas before.
"Listen to me, you rat. You pig. You dirty piece of shit stuck to Crowley's shoe. Crowley could send one hundred demons to us, and we would kill every single one of them. None of you will hurt Dean, I will not allow it. So we're going to send you back to Hell, with a message to your boss; Dean is mine. I will protect him until the day I die, every second of every one of the days that I live until then. I am always watching over him, guarding him. I'm his angel, he's my hunter, and if you try to hurt us again, I will kick your sorry little ass right off the throne and into the dirt where you belong."
Cas stood straight again, fists no longer shaking, taking deep breaths to relax himself. Dean stared at him, mouth hanging open in impressed shock.
"Hey guys?" Sam walked in, viewing them with curiosity. "Sorry, but we need to take down this tent soon."
"We're finished here." Cas said, brushing past Dean. "Exorsice him."
"Sam, take care of it." Dean said to his brother, rushing to follow Cas.
He saw him walking away and half-jogged over to him, grabbing him by the elbow. About twenty feet away from them, two humvees, a jeep and a tank were being crowded around by his fellow soldiers, all packing with a sense of urgency. Clouds, dark and thick, were coming towards them from the same distance, and the wind was picking up, causing sand to glide like smoke over the ground and settle again.
"Cas." He murmured, and he turned around and looked at him. "Thank you."
"Don't." Castiel replied. "It was a bad idea. Amon was right, love is a disadvantage."
"No." Dean shook his head, seeing how sad Cas looked. "No, it's not."
"It doesn't matter. I've doomed us all. Crowley's just going to send more demons." He stared at the sand whirling around his feet.
"I think that speech'll scare him off pretty good. Don't worry about it." Dean reassured him, moving the hand on his elbow to rub it up and down his arm.
"And after that. He'll hurt you. And Sam, Benny, everyone. We can't do that to ourselves Dean, we can't get hurt even more."
"Then we'll prepare ourselves, okay? We'll fight them, just like we did today. We'll beat them." Dean looked into his eyes, searching for something, though he wasn't sure what.
"I can't be here." Cas said to him, and his eyes looked blank for a moment before the sadness peaked through. "I'm putting you in danger, Dean. If I left, you'd be safer."
"No. Shut up. You tried that in Purgatory, remember? It didn't work out." He recalled, his words fierce.
"Sam wasn't in Purgatory. Neither was your platoon. We're putting innocents in danger, and for what, Dean?" Cas looked incredulous.
"For this." He said, and pulled Cas towards him, closing his eyes. Their lips met, hit together, and Dean moved his against Cas', who eventually repeated the moment. Dean tilted his head, feeling Cas' stubble graze him, and deepened the kiss. His tongue flicked against Cas' lips, and they parted slightly. Dean felt their tongues touch, like an electric shock moving down his spine and numbing his brain momentarily, and he put one hand on Cas' hip and pulled him in closer. Cas ran his hand through Dean's hair, hand trembling for a reason different than when it had in the tent just minutes ago, and he too pulled Dean in closer by his hip, causing their bodies to touch completely, with almost no space between. The kiss became breathy and they both felt light-headed.
"Tell me you want to leave again, now." Dean said, pulling back, but still an inch from the other man's face.
"I don't." Said Cas, opening his eyes. "But I know I should."
"We can protect each other, Cas." Dean whispered. "We can fight the demons."
"You're wrong." He whispered back. "You're hoping for the best."
"I know." Dean rested his head on Cas' shoulder, voice strained with pain. "I know."
"I love you." Castiel whispered into his ear, his hand still toying with his hair.
"I love you, too." Dean knew he couldn't stop him from going. "I'll keep fighting for you, Cas."
And suddenly, his hand wasn't on a hip, it was outstretched into the air, and the other was no longer gripping an arm, and his head was not resting on a shoulder, only bowed down in sadness, staring at the sand. After a moment, Dean dropped to his knees, watching the sand dance in the wind around him. Tears came to his eyes, but he fought them back.
A hand rested on his shoulder after a minute, but he knew it wasn't Cas, and therefore didn't really care.
"It's time to go, Dean." Sam said gently, and Dean looked up to see a caring face, and remembered why Cas was doing this.
He held out a hand, and Sam pulled him up. They turned and looked over to the crew, now packed and ready to leave. In the back of his mind, Dean thought that everyone had probably seen them kiss, but it hardly mattered. They walked over, as fast as they could in the dark and the sand, and climbed into the jeep, Benny already at the wheel. As they drove away, Sam and Dean looked behind them one last time, to the pile of bodies left from the day's carnage, plus one man standing beside them, hands covering his face.
"The kid Amon possessed is gonna help us cover it up." Sam said to him. "They'll make him a hero."
Dean nodded, but said nothing. The young man was probably sobbing.
"Is Cas gonna come back?" Sam asked him, and Dean closed his eyes for a moment, remembering their embrace.
"One day." He answered. "I know he will."