Most of my family and I sat around the living room watching Batman And Robin, trying to 'bond' as Carlisle calls it. Of course Emmett picked out the movie. I think he might have a bit of a crush on Poison Ivy. Renesmee and Jacob we're out hunting.

Holy shit she's so hot. Rose would kill me if she knew. Eddy you better not say anything or I'll kick your ass!

I sighed. Emmett really needs to get more creative. Of course Bella heard and looked at me questioningly. I just shook my head slightly and mouthed later.

"Someone's coming!" Alice shouted. She sounded excited. I quickly tuned into her mind but all I heard was her blasted singing.

It still amazed me how after spending so much time with Nessie and the pack, Alice had developed the ability to see them.

I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world! Life in plastic, it's fantastic! You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere.

"Oh my god Alice! Would you pick a different song?!" I shouted across the room at her.

"Bite me Edward!"

"That's my job," my Bella said, her voice sultry.

God! Do you think she could TRY to control her lust? If she doesn't tone it down a bit I'm going to take Alice and run.

"Bella love. You need to rain in your lust before you kill Jasper. He's almost on overload," I said, kissing her nose gently.

"Sorry Jasper," she whispered. Rosalie chuckled knowing Bella would be blushing if she still could.

I wonder who's coming over. I don't believe we were expecting visitors. Esme is going to go into a cleaning frenzy now. I guess we'll have to postpone tonight's plans…

"CARLISLE! Eww! Let's not go down that path. A little help Bella?" I asked, hating seeing my family's evening activities. Thankfully I could no longer hear anything but the gently quietness of my own thoughts.

"So Alice who is it that's coming to visit? Shall we make up the guest rooms?" asked Esme. A particular sparkle in her eye. I knew she was planning a renovation.

"Just some friends, they won't require accommodations. They shall be staying for a week if we are okay with that, which we are," replied Alice, "Though I do believe Nessie and Jacob could use a room, seeing as they are going to be developing there relationship within the week by my calculations."

I scowled at Alice. Even if I had given in almost 7 years ago that doesn't mean I like hearing about it. It was my precious little angel and her soul mate was once in love with my darling wife. It still bothered me slightly.

"I would stop talking Ali, before Edward rips you limb from limb. And Edward, tone down the anger before I end up losing what little bit of emotional control I have left."

I worked to bring my anger in check, knowing Jasper meant it. None of us needed to see Jasper having a breakdown.

I heard a car coming up the drive, though I couldn't tell who it was. They we're driving faster than any human would dare drive up our path though it could still be one of the pack. They visit often. After all, Jacob lives here.

"They're here!" Shouted Alice. There went that idea.

Carlisle stood up from his seat next to Esme and walked to the door, opening it at the first knock. No one breathed.

Carlisle stood back and in filed Maggie, Zafrina, Nahuel, Tanya, Kate, and Garrett. I was confused as to why they were here, especially since most were without there mates or covens. Bella must have been in on some sort of plot because she was blocking their thoughts.

"Bella, love, why are you blocking…everyone?" I asked confused.

The look on Bella's face reminded me of the one Nessie used to make when she got caught doing something naughty, like sneaking into Jacob's room at night.

"I'm just protecting my friends from unwanted intrusion, plus Alice promised no shopping trips for 3 months."

Again I knew Bella would blush if she could. I would always miss her blush. It was so beautiful and one of my favorite things about her human life, but I would never change the way she was now. She's still my Bella, only a little more durable and a lot more passionate. Much of her humanity came with her into this life.

"ALICE! You need to stop bribing my wife. It's not fair!"

"Oh don't whine Edward, I just didn't want you spilling the beans."

Waves of confusion rolled off me. What secret wouldn't I be able to keep?

"You have no idea what tomorrow is do you?"

I thought back, a few things came to mind but none of them required the presence of the 6 additional vampires.

"EDWARD! It's our daughters official birthday! Please tell me you didn't actually forget!" Bella yelled at me. Well of course I didn't forget but I still didn't get it.

"He's still confused Bells. Maybe you should spell it out for him while Nessie and Jacob are still away…" Jasper said. I turned back to Bella, looking for an explanation.

"Edward, there here for Ness's birthday party, but since you and Jacob both tell her whatever she wants to know we decided it would be better to keep it from you. Besides, surprising you is always so much fun," Bella answered. I chuckled and wrapped her up in my arms, kissing her lightly.

"That explains it. Well in that case, welcome. I'm sorry if I seemed rude, I was just surprised to see you."

"That's quite alright," Tanya answered.

"Ali, shall we tell Edward about the other part of our reasoning?"

Oh shit…that was the only coherent thought I had. Whenever Bella and Alice schemed together it meant danger for the rest of us, though when Bella and Emmett schemed together it meant disaster.

"Before you answer that may I ask if Emmett was involved in any part of this?"

Emmett laughed and I knew right away he did.

"Of course I did Eddie-poo! Aren't I always involved?"

"Anyways! Maggie here has agreed to play a game with us while she's here…and if you refuse to play Edward, Bella has agreed not to touch you for a month. So you best just agree!"

I surrendered, knowing there was no point in fighting it. Though my curiosity was peaked when Alice mentioned that Maggie was a big part of the game.

"I agree…so what's the game?"

Alice got that glint in her eye and I shivered slightly, involuntarily. Instinctually I grasped Bella closer to me. Panic filled me.

"Sheesh Edward, you would think the world is coming to an end, calm down," Jasper griped, sending waves of calm and tranquility over me. I soon began to feel sluggish and lethargic though I couldn't sleep.

"Your over doing it Jazz…I'm about to pass out," I said with what little energy I had left. Jasper sent me a small shot of adrenaline, effectively waking me up.

"What's the game?" I asked still a little nervous.

"Remember when Bella was still human and we tortured her with the lie detector test? Well it's Bella's turn for revenge."

I gasped a little. I had a bad feeling about this. From the look in Bella's eyes, I was her only target.

"Why Maggie? Why did you agree to this?!" I asked her, slightly begging with my voice for her to change her mind.

"Because I knew it would be the perfect present for Renesmee. Who doesn't want to give there daddy a lie detector test? And one as accurate as I am?" answered Maggie. She laughed lightly, causing her curls to bounce.

"And when do you plan on playing this game?" I asked.

"Tomorrow, Ness and Bells will have the floor but anyone can ask you a question. Don't worry, Ness will get to choice other people to put through the torture for the week Maggie's here. It's Nessie's choice," explained Alice.

"Oh like you don't know who she's going to pick."

"No actually I don't since she doesn't know who she's going to pick since she DOESN'T EVEN KNOW! Now sit down and shut up," Alice laughed.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Oh wow! We get to ask dad questions and he can't lie! Wicked! This is the best present ever!" Renesmee shouted, jumping up and down.

"Even better than the Aston Martin DB9 I got you?" I asked.

"Way better dad! The can run as fast as the car but I'll never get another chance to look into your mind like this again!"

I sighed and sat down on the chair, as everyone gathered 'round. Bella and Nessie sat together on the loveseat, facing me. Twin expressions on their faces. I knew I was in for it now.

"Okay ladies, anytime you want to start I'm ready," said Maggie. The word's of my doom.

"Renesmee you go first, it's your birthday after all."

Renesmee looked calculating and Jasper sent me waves of calming.

"Dad, have you ever thought about killing Jacob?" asked Nessie, looking truly curious.

"Yes I have but it was before you we're born. Back when he was hell bound and determined to come between your mother and I."

"He's telling the truth," said Maggie.

"Have you ever kissed anyone other than me?" Bella asked, with that look on her face yet again that said, 'If I could still blush, I would be red as a tomato.'

"No love I haven't. At least not in a sexual way."

"Truth," Maggie responded simply.

"Do you know where my gnome is?" asked Jasper. Him and his stupid precious gnome…it deserved the fate it received.

"No I have no idea where it is right now," I responded, and it was true. I hadn't seen his gnome since Emmett and I had sent it up on that miniature rocket we had built in our back yard.

"That's a half truth…" Maggie said.

"Where was it the last time you saw it?" Jasper asked.

"Umm, attached to a rocket…on it's way to outer space…" I muttered under my breath. Though I knew everyone heard me.

Jasper growled loudly, while Alice held him in his chair, whispering soothing words into his ear.

"Did you and Bella have sex in our bed?" asked Rosalie. What the hell? What kind of question was that? Then I remembered, we all asked Bella sexual questions when she was going through the lie detector test.

"Once, but it was only because we couldn't find anywhere else at the time. You and Alice we're in Alice's room and Jazz and Em we're in ours. But I KNOW you and Emmett did it in my bed while Bella and I we're staying in the cottage!"

"Truth," Maggie called, sounds shocked. I couldn't blame her. It was kind of weird.

Rose looked incredulous. Emmett just looked amused.

Unfortunately Bella was blocking everyone so I had no idea what any of them were thinking.

"My turn again," said Nessie, "Will you throw a fit if Jacob and I move into the house together?"

"Yes I will throw a fit, but I will allow it in the end because you and Jacob are no different than what your mother and I were like before we were married," I said sighing.

"Truth."

"It's hard be believe it's only been 7 years love. My question is, do you ever regret changing me?" Bella asked, her face unreadable.

"Not for even the shortest of breaths. Sure there are some things I miss, such as your blush and your heartbeat, but I wouldn't give up forever with you just to see you blush or hear your heartbeat. I have you now, in every way I could have ever wanted," I said, my eyes darkening with the love and passion I feel for Bella.

"Truth."

"Have you ever mooned anyone?" asked Emmett.

"Never!" I shouted. I'm much to gentlemanly to do such a thing.

"Wow…Lie…" Maggie said, shocked.

"Oh my god! WHO?!" demanded Emmett.

"Oh right…that one time…Sorry…I mooned Bella once…but that was it."

"Truth."

I chuckled at the memory of that night. Bella and I we're having fun and I told her to kiss my ass and she told me to mark the spot and needless to say, I dropped my drawers…Good times…good times…

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen so help me god you swore we wouldn't speak of that night. It was PRIVATE time…"

"Well Emmett asked and I was informed that I had to answer all questions truthfully and fully," I retorted.

Bella simply glared at me, biting her tongue. Her eye's said I was getting it after dark, when we we're alone…Maybe Jasper would like to go hunting tonight. I'll have to ask him.

"Don't even think about it Edward, Jazz and I have plans," Alice said menacingly.

Crap.

"Have you ever thought about anyone other than Bella in a sexual way?" Carlisle asked, voicing the same question he had all those years ago.

"Nope," I answered, my lips popping on the p.

"Lie," Maggie said, examining her fingernails. They we're currently painted a misty black but from her eyes I could see she was thinking about changing them.

Emmett let out a booming laugh and asked, "WHO?!"

I sighed. Who other than my Bella have I ever thought about in a sexual way? Then it dawned on me. Of course! It's easy to see how I could have forgotten her, it had been almost 90 years since I'd seen her.

"Her name was Emma. Emma Samantha Robb. She lived next door to my family when I was still human. I used to think about her sometimes when I saw her out and about. She was a bit of a harlot. It was hard not to notice her in that way," I explained.

"Oh well then, that's okay…" said Bella. And by the look on her face it truly was. After all she once fantasized about a fictional character or two.

"Anything else you want to know Renesmee? This is a one time only opportunity because you should know I will NEVER sit through this humiliation again."

"Yeah dad. I have a couple more questions. Like have you ever actually driven UNDER the speed limit?!" Renesmee asked.

"Of course, your mother used to make me drive her truck and that old beast couldn't go above 55 without shuddering, as though it was going to die," I chuckled, amused by the memory.

"Speaking of The Beast, did you or did you not kill it in order to buy me a new car?" Bella asked me entertained.

"I may have had a hand in it but it was Rosalie who did it!" I shouted, trying to deflect her anger away from me. Much to my surprise, Bella smiled.

"Thank you Rose. I really appreciate it. Even if I didn't then," she said. I was shocked.

"Truth and truth," Maggie said. I realized she had been staring off into space, not really paying attention.

"Is there anything you regret not experiencing while you were still human?" Nessie asked. Her questions more philosophical than embarrassing.

"Yes. I regret not being able to experience knowing your mother while we were both still human but to be honest I wouldn't change it. Because if we were both human, we would eventually die and I never want to lose your mother. Forever isn't even long enough," I said lovingly.

"Truth."

"What is your all time favorite movie?" Nessie asked. She had asked me that when she was '3'. My answer then had been The Goonies. It was a great movie. Though severely childish.

"The Goonies," I found my answering again.

"Lie," Maggie said, couldn't she just agree with me for once?

"Fine, it's…Blood and Chocolate," I answered.

Everyone laughed and I could understand why.

"Isn't that a WEREWOLF movie?" Jacob asked, speaking up for the first time since we began this ridiculous 'game'.

"Yes Jake it is. But it's still a touching movie!" I would blush if I could.

"Ever been jealous?"

"Yes, of Jacob, Mike, Tyler, Eric, anyone who's ever had an impure thought about my Bella."

"You were jealous of Jacob? Why? I mean I know that Jake used to have a thing for mum but why would you be jealous? It's not like mum ever reciprocated the feelings."

I laughed. No one ever really told her what happened in the past. The day we fought Victoria, the kiss they shared, the love they had once felt for each other.

"Renesmee, your mother did reciprocated the feelings, she loved Jacob very much. However she loved me more. They even kissed once."

"Twice…well technically the day of the fight we kissed two times plus the kiss on the beach…so three times," corrected Jacob.

"Can you say ew? My mother and my boyfriend kissed? THREE TIMES? That is so many levels of wrong!"

"It was before you we're born Ness, and since I first saw you I've never had eyes for anyone but you. You are my life, my world, my everything. I hope you know that."

Renesmee walked over to Jacob and sat in his lap, leaning into his chest. I didn't need Jaspers power to know the amount of love passing between them right now. Even a blind man could see it.

"Okay one more question before your mother and I go. I'm sure she has some yelling to do," I stated simply.

"Alright, let me think. I want it to be a good one."

I waited patiently while Renesmee thought over what she wanted to know. You could almost see the cogs working while she thought deeply.

"Fine, my final questions is, do you have any regrets in this life? Or your human life for that matter?"

I thought about that, did I have any regrets? Sure I did. But not anymore. Because now I have my beautiful Bella for all of eternity and my angelic little daughter.

"I used to, before I met your mother. Even then I had regrets but, after I married her, and we had you, they all went away. The moment I saw your mother didn't regret me changing her, all my regrets of the past went away," I answered, and with that I stood up, pulling Bella with me.

"Truth. So Kate, feel like going hunting?"

Kate and Maggie stood up too, leaving out the back door. They were running before they hit the end of the deck.

"Thank you dad. I loved this. And I can't wait to choice my next victim, in the morning. I'm fairly tired right now and I still have to go see Charlie and Sue. Also the La Push boys are throwing a bonfire in my honor. We won't be out late. Love you mum, dad," Renesmee said, hugging us both before grabbing the keys to her new car. They left swiftly, not wanting to keep Charlie and Sue waiting. Seth came rushing down the stairs.

"Wait for me! I promised my mum I wouldn't be late this time. The only way I'll be on time is if I arrive with you two. Any later than that is unacceptable," He shouted.

"Then hurry up you idiot!" Jacob shouted back. And with that they were gone.

"I love you," I whispered in Bella's ear, pulling her toward the cottage.

"I love you too," she whispered back, "But your so not off the hook yet."

A/N: So guys tell me what you thought. Some of this was meant to be funny, while some of it was meant to be a little deep. I decided that after spending 7 years living under the same roof as Renesmee and Jacob, Alice's power grew and she could start seeing them. They we're fuzzy at first but now she sees them as clearly as she sees humans. I'm going to start working on the next chapter soon. Please feel free to tell me who you want put in the hot seat. And there will be a big surprise in the next chapter. Also because I don't know if it was clear, this is Renesmee's 7th birthday, making her fully grown by Stephanie's standards for half-breeds, and old enough to be with Jake. They've been going out for about a year now. Since she was about '16'.