I'm gonna do the second part of the weddding then all the lovely collaborators start at 8x01, unless you want to do the wedding. On with the story
writerchic30: Sure just make an account and PM me.
[Mondler's apartment. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are in the kitchen.]
Monica: All right, I'm gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
Rachel: I'll do it.
Monica: Who wants it? Anybody?
Rachel: I said I'll do it!
Monica: Nobody wants to do it? All right, I'll do it myself.
Rachel: Monica! I'm not gonna screw it up!
Monica: Y'know what? You're right, I'm sorry. Actually you were a big help tonight. Yeah, and thanks for putting my grandmother in the cab and making sure she got to the hotel safely.
Rachel: Well of course that is what I'm here for!
Monica: Okay. Sorry. (Monica goes into the bathroom to throw up)
Rachel: Ugh! (To Phoebe) What grandmother?
Phoebe: Mon's totally pregnant
Rachel: I know. Chandler and her are getting married. Then having a baby, what a fairytale!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is wearing sunglasses and as he exits his bedroom, Ross enters the apartment.]
Joey: Hey! Where have you been?
Ross: Oh, taking my parents back to the hotel.
Joey: Oh.
Ross: What? Are you going back to work?
Joey: Yeah.
Ross: Nice shades.
Joey: Thanks. Yeah, I figure if I wear these in my scenes at least I won't get spit in the eyes, y'know?
Ross: And if I remember correctly, Ray Ban was the official sponsor of World War I!
Joey: Great! All right. I'll see you later. (He starts to leave.)
Ross: Hey, where's Chandler?
Joey: Uh, I think he's in Rachel's room. See ya. (Exits.)
[Scene: The Movie Set, Joey is getting his make-up touched up as Richard approaches.]
Richard: Hey Joey, could you uh, go through these lines with me? (He's holding a script.)
Joey: Oh man! They-they just redid my make-up!
Richard: Just the last two pages.
Joey: Alright.
(They go onto the set.)
Richard: I found the picture!
(He's still spitting and Joey holds his script in front of his face.)
Joey: Picture? What picture?
Richard: Could you uh, could you lower your script? I need to see your face so I can uh, play off your reaction.
Joey: Okay uh, look I know you're a great actor, okay? And you play all those Shakespeare guys and stuff…
Richard: Oh, thanks.
Joey: But you're spittin' all over me man!
Richard: Well of course I am!
Joey: You know you've been spitting on me?!
Richard: That's what real actors do! Annunciation is the mark of a good actor! And when you enunciate, you spit! (Spits on the t)
Joey: (wiping face) Wow! Didn't know that.
Richard: Great!
Joey: Thanks! Okay-okay check it out! (Reading from the script) Picture? What picture? (He pauses then spits) Eh?
[GellerBing residence. Only Rachel and Phoebe are there]
Phoebe: I can't believe the lovebirds are gonna have a baby
Rachel: I know! How far do you think she is?
Phoebe: About two month's because Chandler told us that he and Monica had some wild sex the night Joey got the soapie.
Rachel: Eww Pheebs!
Then they hear the door open.
Mondler enter the apartment and he's kissing her neck.
Chandler: Mon I can't wait until we get married in a few hours. I love you so much.
Monica: I love you so much too.
The lovebirds then start to kiss.
Phoebe:(in a whisper) And they are gonna have a baby too!
Ross: Eww guys!
Rachel: Aww they love each other so much!
[Scene: Ross enters the coffee house]
Ross: Well then, we'll-we'll see you the day after tomorrow. (Walks away slowly, but notices something.) Mom?! Dad?! (They're sitting by the window.) What-what…what you guys doing here?!
Mr. Geller: Well, you kids talk about this place so much, we thought we'd see what all the fuss is about.
Mrs. Geller: I certainly see why the girls like coming here.
Ross: Why?!
Mrs. Geller: The sexy blonde behind the counter. (She waves at Gunther who waves back.)
Ross: (shocked) Gunther?!
Mr. Geller: Your mother just added him to her list.
Ross: What? Your-your list?
Mrs. Geller: Yeah, the list that—of people we're allowed to sleep…
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know I'm looking for him?
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know I'm looking for her.
(Ross points at him and exits.)
[Scene: The Movie Set, Richard and Joey are doing a scene.]
The Director: Action!
Richard: I found the picture!
Joey: What picture?!
Richard: The picture of my wife! In your pack!
Joey: You went through my personal property?
Richard: Why do have a picture of Paulette in your pack?!
Joey: (pause) Because Vincent, we were lovers. (Pause) For two years!
The Director: Cut! Wonderful!
(Joey and Richard both wipe their faces and are given towels.)
Joey: Great scene yeah?
Richard: Oh you're awesome! And, in that last speech? You soaked me.
Joey: Thanks a lot.
The Assistant Director: (To Joey) Here's your call sheet for tomorrow.
Joey: Oh, I'm-I'm not working tomorrow.
The Assistant Director: You are now.
Joey: No! No! I can't! You gotta get me out of it! I've got plans! (Spits.) Important plans! (Spits on the Ps.)
(The AD walks away wiping his face.)
[Scene: The Movie Set, Joey and Richard are in the middle of a scene. They are both holding swords.]
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Richard: That can be arranged.
(Richard thrusts, misses Joey by several feet and Joey screams in pain and drops to his knees.)
The Director: Let's reset.
Joey: What?! He got me! Owwwwww!
The Director: Let's take it from there.
Richard: (To Joey) Are you a little off today? It's going terribly slowly.
Joey: Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? And I'm the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
Richard: Of course! I'm-I'm sorry. I-I'd hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
Joey: Thank you. Thank you.
The Director: Still rolling, annnnd action!
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Richard: Now, that can be arranged! (He brings his sword back and drops it, causing it to fly over the wall.) Slippery little bugger!
[Scene: The Hotel, Monica's room, Mr. and Mrs. Bing are staring at each other while Phoebe looks on.]
Phoebe: So-so you two were married huh? What happened? You just drift apart?
(Rachel and Mrs. Geller enter.)
Mrs. Geller: Here comes the bride.
(Monica enters wearing her wedding dress.)
Phoebe: Oh my God Monica!
Monica: I wanna wear this everyday.
Rachel: You look so beautiful.
Monica: (starting to cry) I'm so happy for me.
(Despite Monica only being about two months, a bump is already forming)
(The phone rings and Rachel answers it.)
Rachel: Hello?
Rachel: Yeah, we got him back. Everything's fine.
Joey: Damnit!
Rachel: What? Why? Where are you?
Joey: I'm still on the set!
Rachel: Joey! The wedding is in less than an hour!
Joey: I know! I'm sorry! The guy's drunk, they won't let me go until we get this.
Rachel: Oh my God! I'm gonna have to find another minister.
Joey: No! No, I'm the minister! Alright, look-look, put 'em both on the phone, I'll marry them right now.
Rachel: Ugh! Joey love, I have to go.
Joey: Hey! Don't you hang up on me! I'll marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Rachel: I love you
(She hangs up anyway.)
[Scene: The Movie Set, Joey is walking up to the director, pleading with him to let him go.]
Joey: Aaron! You gotta let me go. The guy's hammered!
The Director: I'm sorry Joey, as long as he's here and he's conscious we're still shooting.
(He walks away and Joey does Ross's fist thing. He then enters Richard's dressing room, to find Richard cutting his steak with his sword.)
Richard: You wouldn't happen to have a very big fork?
Joey: So I uh, I just talked to the director. That's it, we're done for the day.
Richard: Well have we finished the scene?
Joey: Yeah! You…you were wonderful.
Richard: As were you.
Joey: So I got your car, it's right outside.
Richard: Why? Are we done for the day?
Joey: That's what you told me.
Richard: Oh, thank you. You're welcome. (He stands up, staggers to the couch, and starts to lie down.)
Joey: No-no-no! We gotta go! Come on! (Joey picks him up in a fireman's carry and carries him out.) Here we go.
Richard: Is that my ass? (He's looking at Joey's.)
(And as Joey walks out the door, Richard grabs a bottle of Scotch, just as the door closes and carries it with him.)
[Scene: In the hotel hallway. Rachel and Phoebe are talking]
(spoken by Phoebe) "Wait! Maybe-maybe you're overreacting! You do that y'know."
(spoken by Rachel) "Well, Phoebe, we gotta do something! I mean there's no way Joey's gonna make it in time. So, I'm gonna through the hotel and see if there's any other weddings going on."
(spoken by Phoebe) "Okay. Oh, but don't tell them Monica's pregnant because they frown on that."
(spoken by Rachel) "Okay."
(spoken by Phoebe) "Okay."
(They head in separate directions and Chandler emerges and he's so shocked that his cigarette is hanging from his lip.)
Commercial Break
[Scene: The Hotel, Rachel is walking through the ballroom area and comes upon the sign for the Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding.]
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {It's a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (He's wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
The Rabbi: I don't know. Are they Greek Orthodox?
Rachel: Yeah! Yeah. They're…they're-they're my friends, uh, Monica Stephanopolus and uh, and Chandler Acidofolus.
(He walks up onto the altar and notices the rabbi.)
The Rabbi: Are you Chandler?
Chandler: Are you Joey?
(Ross walks down the aisle with Phoebe and Rachel on his arms.)
Ross: Huh. This is nice.
Phoebe: What?
Ross: I've never walked down the aisle knowing it can't end in divorce.
(Finally, Monica with her parents on her arms start down the aisle.)
Mrs. Geller: Oh I wish your grandmother had lived to see this.
Monica: She's right there.
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Mr. Geller: I love you sweetheart. (He kisses her and they sit down.)
(Chandler steps off the altar to greet his bride-to-be.)
Chandler: You look beautiful. Is this new? (Her dress.)
Monica: Not now.
Chandler: Okay.
(They both step up onto the altar and she notices the rabbi.)
Monica: (To Chandler) Who is this?
The Rabbi: I am Father Kalebasous.
Chandler: (in Monica's ear) He's Greek Orthodox.
Rachel: (leaning in) As are you…
The Rabbi: Let us begin. Dearly beloved…
Joey: (entering) That's my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, I'm sorry I'm a little late. You may be confused by this now, (He's still in costume) but you won't be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, let's get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. I've known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can notimagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as I've left my notes in my dressing room, we shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
(She turns to get her vows from Rachel.)
Monica: Chandler, for so long I…I wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soul mate. Then three years ago, at another wedding I turned to a friend for comfort. And instead, I found everything that I'd ever been looking for my whole life. And now…here we are…with our future before us…and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soul mate, my friend. Unless you don't want to. You go!
Joey: Chandler?
(Ross leans in to give Chandler his vows.)
Chandler: (To Ross) No, that's okay. (Ross nods and retreats.) Monica I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever had to do. But when I saw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprises that come our way, it's okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if I'm sure? (He leans in and kisses her.)
Joey: You may not kiss the bride. So, I guess by the powers vested in me by the state of New York and the Internet guys, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Oh wait! Do you take each other?
Chandler: I do.
Monica: I do.
Joey: Yeah you do!
Ross: Rings?
Joey: Aw crap! Okay—uh…uh let's-let's do the rings.
(Chandler and Monica both turn, take the rings from Ross and Rachel respectively, and place them on each other's fingers.)
Joey: We good? Yeah? Good? Once again, I pronounce you husband and wife. (To Chandler) Now kiss her again.
(They kiss and everyone applauds.)
Chandler: (To Monica) I love you. And I know about the baby.
Monica: I love you so much too and you are gonna be a great father.
Chandler: And you will be a great mother.
(They kiss again. He puts his hands on her waist pulling her in a more romantic kiss)
Rachel: Lovebirds and they are gonna have a baby!
More will be up later on okay? :^) There is three feet of snow in thr front of my house.