A/N: Welcome back. Hope you enjoyed the first crazy chapter! The craziness will only continue and maybe even get worse. Now, on with your scheduled story.

Narrator's POV

Leandra Hawke awoke and began with her daily routine. When she went downstairs though she was met with an odd sight. On the floor of her study was her eldest child, in panther form, being cuddled by her apostate friend Anders. Leandra cleared her throat and Althea's ears perked up. She shifted her head and opened one eye to look at her mother. She then gave a soft growl.

"Before you get defensive, I'd thought you'd like to know there's a mage draped over top of you." She stated.

Althea shrugged and closed her eye.

"And I believe he's drooling." She said.

Althea jumped up and Anders hit the ground with an audible thud and groan. He opened his eyes to see a human Althea glaring at her mother.

"Liar." She said, to Anders, "Do you need a bandage?"

"No I think I'm good." He responded, sitting up and rubbing the back of his head.

"Thea, dear, where's your sister?" Leandra asked.

"Depends." Anders said, "Is her door still locked?"

"Why would her door be locked?" Her mother asked.

"Stupid Glowstick." Althea muttered.

"What does your elven friend have to do with her door being locked?" She asked.

"He's Devi's friend, mother not mine." She said with a glare, "and think about it."

There was a pause. It seemed the very world was put on hold.

"He's dead." Leandra said and marched upstairs to Devi's bedroom.

She banged on the door.

"Open this door right now Devi Laverna Hawke!" She exclaimed, "Althea Nyx Hawke, get rid of this damn door!"

Devi's POV

Devi groaned and burrowed her face further into her moving pillow.

'Wait.' She thought, 'Pillows don't move.'

She opened one eye and found a shirtless sleeping elf.

'Why is it I get more drunk on sleep deprivation than alcohol?' She asked herself.

"Open this door right now Devi Laverna Hawke!" She exclaimed, "Althea Nyx Hawke, get rid of this damn door!"

Devi groaned and closed her eye. Unfortunately, she woke Fenris.

"Why is your mother yelling?" He asked sleepily.

"Door locked, barricaded, your in here, go back to sleep." She attempted to explain and cuddled up to him more.

"Ok." He said and drifted back off.

Althea's POV

"YES! FIRE!" Althea yelled happily with her hands in the air and began doing a happy dance, "Watch and learn bitch."

"Language!" Her mother said.

"Details." She said waving her mother's scolding off.

"Thea the house is made of wood." Anders said.

"And your point?" She asked.

"Fire eats wood." He said.

"I can control it." She said, sticking out her tongue.

Narrator's POV

Once the door was completely consumed by fire, they were met with the scale rimmed eye of Tobias.

"I can't burn that." Althea whined.

"Aw. You do care about your sister." Anders said.

"Nope. He's fire resistant." She said, "I would know."

"Your sister is in so much trouble." Leandra said.

Althea did a happy dance.

"You're in trouble too Nyx." She said.

"Why?" Althea asked.

Leandra looked pointedly at Anders and the charred remains of the door frame.

"That was an accident!" She said, "And you told me to get rid of it!"

Devi's POV

"And you told me to get rid of it!"

Devi growled.

"She burned down my door." She muttered.

Tobias fixed her with his other eye and grinned.

"Stop grinning!" Was a muffled response.

"Good boy." Devi praised and curled back up on Fenris to sleep.

3 hours

Devi woke fully rested and looked up to the completely awake Fenris.

"How long have you been up?" She asked.

"I woke at the Witch's many curses for the Drake not burning." He replied, "It's quite amusing because your mother keeps reprimanding her."

"I can see that. You stay here." She said, "I'll handle this."

Devi walked over to Tobias, who moved his head back just enough that they could see her face, but not enough to get into the room.

"Devi Laverna Hawke, you are in so much trouble!" Her mother scolded.

"Mother, I'm twenty-four." She said, "I'm allowed to make my own decisions. And if you're going to get upset with me, maybe you should know how Althea ogles Anders' ass at all hours of the day."

At her statement, Anders blushed like a Chantry boy, Althea glared at her sister, and Leandra turned her anger onto her eldest.

"My work here is done." Devi said and Tobias moved back in place in front of the doorway.

Devi crawled back onto the bed and looked at Fenris.

"Now what do we do?" She asked.

"Um…could you put a shirt back on?" He asked avoiding her eyes, "It's distracting."

"Oh, so it's distracting you huh?" She said with a smirk, "Maybe I shouldn't put a shirt on then."

Althea's POV

'Crap. Crap. Crap. Fuck. Shit. Damn it all to hell.' Althea thought, 'I'm going to kill her. WOLF!'

She morphed into her wolf form and darted behind Anders. She glared and growled at her mother, who fixed her with the 'you've got a lot of explaining to do' stare. For his part, Anders stood there, torn between running away, defending Althea, and blushing to his roots. Instead, he just stood there with his mouth shut.

Hanged Man

"So that's what happened when you went home?" Varric asked Althea the next day.

"Yeah." She said, "I really hate my sister right now."

"Well, you have to admit you're not very good at being subtle." He stated, "I'm only surprised your mother hadn't caught on sooner."

"Yeah, Vi's the subtle one." She said, glaring at the floor.

"Though I have to say, I never thought the elf had it in him." He commented.

"Please don't go there. I've had enough scarring mental images." She muttered.

Devi's POV

'I wonder how Thea's doing with Varric. He's probably going to exaggerate the story.' She thought, 'Though, I doubt he'll have to do much exaggerating. Things got weird fast.'

Devi grinned as she walked along the Wounded Coast with Isabella, Sebastian, and Anders.

"So…..what happened in the study?" She asked Anders.

"What are you talking about?" He asked in return.

"When I was otherwise….preoccupied." She said, "What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"That's not what I heard."

"How would you know? You were off sleeping with Fenris."

"Now this I have to hear about!" Isabella exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Sebastian was sulking.

"Is Hawke right?" He asked.

Devi looked at him confused.

"About what?" She asked.

"About the Chantry. Is she right?" He asked.

"Yes. Yes she is." Anders said.

Isabella and Devi looked at each other and shrugged. It was apparently a man thing.

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" Devi asked Isabella.

"We tie up Sebastian and have our wicked way with him?" Isabella mused.

"That's all you." She said, "But we do need them to tell us what's going on, so we will need some rope."

"I always carry rope." Isabella said.

"Handy." Devi nodded.

Narrator's POV

Althea walked into the study to find Anders and Sebastian tied to chairs with ball gags in their mouths.

"What kind of kinky orgy is this?" She asked, "And why is Anders a part of it? You know I have di…..I mean…..what's going on?"(1)

"We're tryin to figure out what you said to that one!" Devi said pointing a dagger at Sebastian.

"When?" She asked.

"In the study!" Devi responded, "When I was….preoccupied."

"How should I know?" Althea shrugged, "I was tired."

"Shit." Isabella said.

"What did she say Anders?" Devi questioned him, "You were here all night!"

"Why do I miss all the juicy bits of information?" Isabella whined.

"Not now Izzy!" Devi said.

"Vi?"

"Yes Thea?"

"He's gagged. He can't answer."

"Oh!"

Devi ripped the ball gag off with a loud "OW!" from Anders and pointed her dagger at him.

"What did she say?" She growled.

"That hurt you know." He said glaring.

"Don't care." She said, "Now tell me."

"All she said was that Sebastian and the rest of the Chantry needed to get laid." He said, "Can I go now?"

"I don't know." She said, "Thea?"

"Huh?" She said looking up from the fireplace.

"Can Anders leave?" Devi asked.

"Fuck no." Althea responded automatically, "I mean…..sure. He has legs. Doesn't he? He does right? Please tell me didn't lose his legs! I need tho…I mean he needs those."

Althea looked around with shifty eyes.

"I'll be…..in my room." She said, slowly edging towards the stairs, "Bye!"

She bolted up the stairs and slammed her door shut.

"I hope your not fantasizing again!" Devi yelled up to her sister, then turned to Anders, "And yes. It would be about you."