I can't believe Itachi's actually making us go to Orochimaru's birthday party. I didn't know he still cared about Konoha, but then again Itachi was always full of surprises.
I yawned, it was 11am but I was feeling tired from this morning, when Itachi's little brother had decided to visit. Itachi was feeling really stressed out in this morning, but everything miraculously went better as soon as Sasuke showed up. Yep…Itachi is a strange and interesting guy!
I stretched and yawned again; Itachi was standing in front of the wardrobe, wondering what to wear to Orochimaru's birthday party.
"Itachi-kun…why can't we just wear our Akatsuki clothes?" I asked, watching him fling numerous shirts out of the wardrobe.
"Hmm?" He said, "It's not very happy and party-like to go in our work uniform."
Itachi pulled out an orange shirt with a black stripe going horizontally through the chest, "Hmm…Kisame, how's this one?"
I frowned, "It's a bit boring."
Itachi agreed, "Yeah…"
Itachi's POV
Kisame found one of my favourite shirts boring? We'll he is half ogre, half shark, so I excused his odd fashion sense and continued looking through the other clothes.
"How's this one?" I asked pulling out another of my favourite shirts, he better not diss this one.
Kisame looked at the shirt and a massive grin spread across his face, "Yeah that one definitely suits you."
I looked at the shirt, it was black with silver buttons that had skulls engraved on them and across the back it said 'Mr.Sexy' in white block lettering.
I routed around in the wardrobe for some pants and Kisame came to my side.
"Want me to help?" He whispered kissing me on the neck.
I smiled, "How are these?" I asked holding up a pair slightly faded black jeans.
Kisame glanced at them and then kissed my neck again, "Those are your tight ass hugging ones aren't they?"
"Yes."
Kisame planted numerous kisses along my neck, leading up to my lips, "Perfect", he said, before pressing his lips onto mine.
Kisame's POV
Itachi dropped the clothes he was holding and his arms wrapped around my neck as he kissed me back lovingly.
"Hmm…what are you going to wear?" He asked, before reaching up to lick my gills.
I smiled, "How 'bout nothing?"
Itachi grinned, "That sounds great."
About ten minutes later, after we'd stopped madly kissing each other, I went over to the wardrobe and pulled out my favourite casual outfit.
It was a navy sleeveless t-shirt that had a picture of 'Jaws' on the front, matched with some really nice black cargo pants that had quite a few buckles and studs on it.
We changed into our party clothes as the party started at 4pm that very day, Orochimaru had the shittiest timing in letting us know. He didn't tell us last week or yesterday…he told us this morning, Orochimaru is so stupid!
I stared at Itachi and his skintight jeans, "Hmm…you look good enough to eat."
Itachi smiled and tied his hair into a ponytail, "We'd better go buy Orochimaru a birthday gift."
I frowned, "Do we have to?"
Itachi walked over to me and kissed me on the cheek, "Birthdays need presents, or they're no fun."
Itachi's POV
We walked into the centre of Konoha and wandered around the market stalls, seeing nothing really interesting or suitable.
"What about this?" Kisame joked, holding up a bright red child's potty.
I chuckled, "Orochimaru, doesn't know how to use them, he's still in nappies remember?"
A few more minutes later we found a stall selling pretty hair accessories, figuring that Orochimaru had such long hair, perhaps he'd like to style it too.
Kisame laughed, grabbing a hand full of pink, purple and cream bobbles, whilst I picked out a cute gift bag with teddy bears on it to put the hair accessories in.
"Hmm…maybe we should get something else as well," I said peering into the half empty gift bag, "It seems a bit cheap to give him so less."
Kisame nodded, "Yeah…it needs to be a bit more special…after all he is like sixty or something now isn't he?"
Kisame's POV
We eventually found a rather interesting stall, with lot and lots of jewellery in it. Itachi smiled and pointed to a snake shaped ring, choker and earring set.
"It's perfect isn't it?" Itachi said cheerily.
I smiled and bought the jewellery; Itachi was great at choosing gifts. One time he bought me a massive shark teddy, because he thought it reminded him of me. Another time he bought me a set of strawberry bath gels. Itachi loves strawberries, I'm not sure why, but he loves strawberry smelling shampoo, shower scrub, toothpaste…everything. Oh yeah…and after he gave me the wonderful bath gels, he helped me use it by scrubbing my back…and everywhere else. Heh, heh…good times.
Itachi looked at me, "What are you thinking?"
I grinned, "Oh nothing…just some nice memories."
Itachi smiled, "Hey look there's an ice cream stand, lets go get some,"
And so we walked home, happy with ice creams, of course Itachi had strawberry flavour, whilst I stuck with some nice mint choc chip.
However, on our way home, we bumped into someone annoying.
Kabuto's POV
I was buying Orochimaru-sama another couple of birthday gifts, after all I'd only bought him fifty presents so far and that was no where enough for my sweet Orochimaru-sama!
I swung my shopping bags cheerily, with 'Icha Icha Paradise – Special Gay Edition', a large snake teddy and a large box of chocolates jiggling around in it.
Just as I was about to go to the florists, I saw Itachi and Kisame, walking my way.
"Hiya Itachi-kun, Kisame-kun!" I said waving to them, "You coming by the party later?"
Kisame didn't say anything, but Itachi kindly smiled and said, "Yes, of course."
Itachi is such a nice young man, handsome too!
I watched as the two men disappeared off into the distance and then I went off to buy some more gifts.
Kisame's POV
Kabuto is such a creepy freak! He was staring at us all that time we went past, it gave me the willies I tell you!
When we got home, it was 1pm; we still had three hours till the party.
"Itachi-kun, what do you want to do now?" I asked, plonking myself down on the living room sofa.
"Hmm…" Itachi put the presents on the kitchen table and then he joined me on the sofa, "…dunno…"
I yawned, "Wanna play some games?"
Itachi's POV
I undid my bobble and ran my fingers through my hair, Kisame's ideas of games, were usually quite strange.
"Um…okay, what game?"
Kisame smiled, "Let's play naughty words."
I scratched my head, "Naughty words?"
Kisame grinned, "For example I could say, Itachi you sexy shit covered little bastard."
I blinked and then chuckled, "Interesting game, you giant chocolate cock."
"Hmm…not quite naughty enough you filthy shark fucker." Kisame said, moving closer to me.
I racked my brains for some dirtier words, "You…um…" Damn it! My mind was completely blank. I was losing! "You…you massive rotten strawberry flavoured wanker!"
"Am I strawberry flavoured?" Kisame asked curiously.
"No you're a horny piss covered pile of pus!" I said, feeling that I was almost getting the hang of the game.
"Horny piss covered pile of pus?" Kisame burst into laughter.
I blushed, it was not normal for me to blush, but right then I couldn't help it.
Kisame's POV
Itachi was kind of crap at this game, I mean horny piss covered pile of pus! I just couldn't stop laughing.
"Can we play something else?" Itachi asked, acting all annoyed and bored.
I smiled and thought for a second, "Okay…how about we play…how many ice cubes?"
Itachi smiled, "I'll win this one!"
I went to the fridge and collected a huge bowl of ice cubes.
"Okay," I said smiling, "We take turns in putting ice cubes on each other and then whoever can't take the cold loses."
Itachi grinned confidently as I dropped an ice cube down his pants. Itachi shivered a bit but then he was back to normal.
"Your turn!" He said happily shoving an ice cube straight into my boxers.
"Ooh…c-cold!" I mumbled cheerily grabbing an Ice cube for Itachi.
About twenty ice cubes each later, we were both shivering and I think our underwear was pretty full.
Itachi decided to continue shovelling ice cubes into my pants anyway; I swear my cock was so cold, I thought it was going to fall off!
Itachi was shivering as much as I was, but I thought I'd just let him win.
"O-Okay…y-you w-win!" I said pulling my pants down so that all the ice cubes fell out and clattered onto the floor.
Itachi grinned and said, "Y-Yeah! I-I t-told y-y…y-you that I w-would win!"
Itachi's POV
I emptied my groin area of ice cubes and then plonked down on the sofa. Damn it! I couldn't feel my dick!
"Heh…you up for another game?" Kisame asked, a twinkle in his eye.
I smiled, "I'll win it whatever it is."
Kisame leaned over and whispered, "Let's play the make out for ages game."
"Hmm…okay."
We kissed each other for ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages and ages…and we did some er hem…other naughty things too. Heh, heh…
I looked at the clock, Oh shit! It's 3.30 already!
"Kisame," I mumbled, he was nibbling my ears, "Kisame!"
"Huh?" Kisame mumbled, "Do we have to go!"
I got up and grabbed Orochimaru's gift bag of presents, "Yes Kisame, come on."
"There better be some really yummy cake," Kisame grumbled, "I'd rather be spending my time playing our games!"
I smiled, "So would I, but we don't want Orochibastard throwing a tantrum and destroying Konoha do we?"
Orochimaru's POV
Ooh! I WAS SO EXCITED! I could barely contain the ecstatic pleasure that I was feeling knowing that my birthday party would be the BEST ONE EVER!
Kabuto had decorated the hall in our secret hideaway with hundreds and hundreds of helium filled balloons and there were pretty neon lights all over the walls! So pretty! So pretty! Like me!
I was dressed up in my favourite clothes today, my lilac frilly flamenco style shirt and crisp cream trousers. I looked so gorgeous!
Kabuto's POV
Orochimaru-sama looked so HAPPY! And I was HAPPY for him! I'd spent many, MANY, MAAAAAAAANY! Hours decorating the gloomy hall and now it looked fit for a party prince.
I watched Orochimaru dance around and around, his frilly sleeves waving as he did a beautiful turn, cartwheel and finished with an adorable pose…aah! So ADORABLE! Just like those figure ice skaters!
I'd laid out a massive feast on the huge table at the centre of the room. The table cloth I made…oh the agony of stitching the damn thing!…it took me a whole month and I had stabbed my fingers with the needle at least seven hundred times!…oh yeah…anyway the table cloth…the pain was worth it because it ended up beautiful, just like Orochimaru!
Itachi's POV
We arrived at Orochimaru's place, 4pm on the dot. I thought we'd have trouble finding the place, but that would be impossible, especially since a massive Orochimaru shaped blimp balloon was hovering out side the place.
Kabuto welcomed us in. I stared…I blinked…whoa…
Kisame's POV
OH…MY…GOD…
I stared…I blinked…I burst out laughing! Kabuto was so gay! I mean…um…well we were all 'gay' really, y'know 'cause I'm with Itachi-kun and Kabuto's with Orochimaru…but seriously, at least we didn't LOOK it. Kabuto…OMG! OMG! OMG!… his outfit practically shouted 'GAY!'
I couldn't control the hysteria and Kabuto looked at me funny, but that just made me laugh even harder!
"What's so amusing?" Kabuto asked, pushing his glasses up.
I bit my lip, "Y-You're a cross dresser!" I burst out laughing again. Itachi just stood there. I think he was frozen in shock.
Orochimaru's POV
YAY! My first guests! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
I jumped up and down clapping my hands giddily.
Kisame was chuckling, what was he laughing at? I stopped jumping and walked over to Kabuto's side, greeting the guests.
"HI ITACHI-KUN! KISAME-KUN!" I squealed, placing my hands on their shoulders.
Kabuto was frowning, Kisame was laughing…Itachi was frozen stiff…heh…stiff…er hem…anyways…was Kisame laughing at my Kabuto-kun!
I looked at Kabuto, I'd made him dress up like a maid, you know, those really sexy ones in black fish net tights, black high heels and a really short black dress…drool…er hem…Kabuto looked delicious!
Itachi's POV
I couldn't believe Kabuto was wearing such a thing! It was just…so…sexy…
If only I could get Kisame to wear something like that!
I glanced at Orochimaru, I think he'd just greeted me or something, he was drooling a bit now…thick slimy drool…Ew.
"Happy Birthday Orochimaru um kun." I said, handing him his gift bag.
"Oh call me Oro-kun!" He said excitedly snatching the bag out of my hand and pulling the gifts out of it hungrily.
Kisame's POV
I took a deep breath, damn Kabuto looked stupid!
I looked at Orochimaru…nah…not as funny looking as Kabuto!
"Happy Birthday!" I said cheerily, patting Orochimaru on the back.
Orochimaru squealed like a teenage girl, OMG…my ears! Ow!
I smiled as Orochimaru, pulled out the hair bobbles and tried to tie his hair in bunches.
Kabuto's POV
I really dislike Kisame…he laughed at my cute maid outfit…bastard.
"Oh Kabuto-kun! Help me with my hair!" Orochimaru-sama said waving some bobbles in my face.
I smiled, Orochimaru always cheered me up. He was so cute! He'd tied his hair up all wrong, so I undid it and tied his hair up into four neat long floppy bunches.
While I was doing this, I noticed Kisame, that bastard! Go over to the table and grab handfuls of snacks, before shoving them all down his throat. Greedy bastard!
End Of Chapter
There are no lemons...there might be limes...but please oh please reveiw...
The story gets better in 'A Big Cock Up' You can't tell me that does'nt catch your attention...