a/n: I was blown away by the response this got! Thank you to everyone that read, reviewed, commented etc. I hope you enjoy this next chapter :)
Disoriented doesn't even scratch the surface of what Emma is feeling right now. To wake up in a hospital bed barely able to move and not knowing how you got there is one thing. Being told that there are actual years of your life you can't remember is another.
So no, disoriented doesn't even cover it.
Not to mention that she suspects that whatever painkillers she's on are starting to wear off. Moving even an inch sends bursts of pain blazing through her entire body, especially her torso.
She does her best not to move too much and spends who knows how long staring at the ceiling trying to recall the last thing she does remember. But everything is too fuzzy in her brain at the moment to pinpoint an exact memory, and thinking about it makes her head ache.
Huffing in frustration she decides that maybe it'll be easier to focus on what she doesn't remember instead. She doesn't remember the accident. But she thinks that's pretty common, and that even people who don't have amnesia sometimes wake up in hospitals and don't know how they got there.
What's not usual though is that she doesn't remember ever living in Boston—well that's not entirely true. She did live here for a brief two months in one of her foster homes growing up, but that hardly counts.
Besides her current situation, she also is quite certain that she doesn't remember the handsome stranger she woke up to.
No. She's definitely certain she doesn't remember him. She can't imagine forgetting a face like that.
Except she did, apparently.
Killian. That's what he'd said his name was. And from the way he'd looked at her—with those stormy, ocean eyes—she got the feeling that maybe she was important to him, or perhaps he was important to her. He'd certainly seemed devastated when she didn't know who he was.
But it's been an hour at least since the doctor talked to her, and if she were important to him wouldn't he have come back by now?
Not that she cares. Technically she doesn't even know him.
The nurse comes in just then, interrupting her thoughts. The woman is kind as she asks how Emma is doing and checks her vitals. Thankfully she gives her another dose of painkillers and promises that she should feel relief soon.
It's just as the nurse is finishing up that Emma hears a quiet knock at the door. Looking up she sees Killian as he takes a few slow and cautious steps into her room. He stands off to the side with his hands behind his back and waits as the nurse completes her tasks and leaves the room.
The soft click of the door shutting echoes through the quiet room, amplifying the silence between them, but Emma doesn't want to be the first to say anything. Because what do you say to someone you're supposed to know but don't?
Killian fidgets back and forth on his feet for a moment before he finally breaks the silence. "How are you feeling, Swan?"
The way his accent wraps around each syllable sends tiny butterflies to her stomach that she does her best to ignore.
She gives him a small shrug and a wry smile. "Oh you know, like I got hit by a truck or something."
His eyebrows lift and he chuckles without humor. "Aye, well that's fairly accurate I must say." He takes his hands out from behind his back and fiddles with a phone for a few seconds before he hands it to her. "I went and got your phone replaced. I figured you'd want it. Unfortunately your old phone was shattered beyond repair in the accident, but this has your old number and contacts and everything."
He scratches behind his ear and looks at the floor before sitting in one of the chairs against the wall, looking for all the world like he has no idea what to do with himself.
"Thank you," Emma says, eyeing him curiously. "And is your number in here?"
"It is. You can call or text me for anything while you're in here."
She raises an eyebrow at that. "Who says I'm going to call you?"
Killian smirks at her, his eyes teasing. "You obviously haven't had to eat the food here yet. You'll be begging me to bring you a grilled cheese and onion rings in no time."
The easy way he mentions one of her favorite meals as if its common knowledge between them catches her off guard, and she finds herself staring at him with an open intensity. Willing herself to just remember who is.
But no matter how hard or how long she stares at him nothing comes.
"Who are you?" she finally asks.
"My name is Killian Jones." He says it with such sadness that Emma can't help but feel her chest ache at his words.
"No. I mean who are you to me?" she clarifies.
"We're friends." He gives her a small smile that's anything but happy and Emma finds herself wishing she could remember who he is just to get rid of the sorrow in his eyes.
"I don't usually have a lot of friends, and not ones that I could say actually know me very well… but you seem to." She tries not to, but she narrows her eyes at him, sensing that there is more to this than what he's telling her.
Killian sighs and rubs his hand back and forth along his scruff. "Aye, love. I know you quite well."
"And… I know you well?"
He answers with a brief nod and Emma looks away, suddenly feeling vulnerable.
Because the thing is she doesn't know this man and as far as she can remember he shouldn't know her. And it's unsettling because she doesn't do this. She doesn't let people get this close to her. But here is a man that had looked at her with such warmth and such affection when she woke, that it's near impossible to dispute that he is as close to her as he claims to be.
And to her that's even more confusing than the memory loss.
She has a million other things she could ask him, she feels like he's all she has to connect her to this life she's woken up to. That maybe he can tell her who she is here, and what her life has led to in the time she seems to have forgotten. But she doesn't get the chance because he suddenly stands and makes his way to the door.
He turns to her before stepping out into the hallway and she finds herself wishing he would stay. If anything just so she can figure out what the hell is going on in her life.
"Get some rest, Swan. I'll be back tomorrow." He's halfway out the door when he stops and turns to her again. "And don't forget to contact me if you need anything. And I mean anything."
"Okay," she whispers so quietly she's not sure he even hears, but he gives a curt nod as though satisfied and makes to leave again. "Killian—" she calls stopping him again. "I…I just wanted to say thank you… uh for the phone and everything."
The corners of his lips lift and she finally sees what a real smile on him looks like. "Of course, Swan. I'll see you tomorrow."
It doesn't take long for Emma to discover that lying in a hospital bed is without a doubt one of the most boring things she's ever done. The ten channels they have on the tiny television in the corner never have anything good on and despite how exhausted she is she doesn't have much success sleeping.
She spends most of her time alternating between trying to rest and scrolling the internet on her phone, which is only appealing for so long.
It's not even noon but she already finds herself wondering when Killian is going to show up for the day. He'd said he was coming but he never specified when, and she's dying to talk to someone other than the nurse.
She considers texting him to ask when he's coming, but then worries if doing so would be weird. Except he did tell her she could contact him about anything and they're supposedly friends, and friends text each other, right?
It should be no big deal, but it still takes about ten minutes of internal debate before she summons the courage to open up her contacts and find his name. It takes another two minutes of just sitting there with her thumb hovering over his name before she finally touches it and presses the send message button and types out quick text.
Emma: You're right. The food here is horrible…
She feels nervous, which is ridiculous, but that doesn't keep her from quickly putting her phone face down on the bed beside her just to keep herself from staring at the screen to see if he's started typing out a response.
The buzz from her phone vibrating happens not even a minute later and if anyone was in the room with her she'd be embarrassed by how fast she picks it up. When she reads his reply she finds herself smiling in spite of herself.
Killian: Ah I told you, Swan. The jello not to your liking?
Emma: I mean I can save you some if you want, but I believe I was promised a grilled cheese and some onion rings.
Killian: Hmmm I don't recall promising such a thing but I guess I can manage swinging by somewhere to pick you up something ;)
Emma snorts at his use of the old emoji and types out a long snarky response only to delete it and go with something much simpler instead.
Emma: Good.
He doesn't answer again and she deliberates just letting the conversation drop, but she does still want to know when he's coming.
Emma: When do you think you'll be here?
The three dots at the bottom of the screen appear and disappear only to appear again. It repeats this pattern two more times before his answer pops up.
Killian: Miss me already?
Emma rolls her eyes. He's not lacking in the self-confidence department that's for sure and she files that piece of information away with what little else she knows about him.
Emma: Nah. Just hungry.
Killian: I'll be there in about an hour, love.
Emma: Okay, see you then.
-CS-
"What'cha smiling at Jones?"
Killian looks up from his phone to see Will Scarlet stepping off one of the boats at the harbor and onto the docks. He begins tying the boat to one of the cleats, but he keeps looking at Killian with raised brows as though waiting for an answer.
Killian shakes his head and puts his phone in his pocket. "You're bloody infuriating, you know that Scarlet?"
Will just shrugs off-handedly and double checks the knot he's tied before standing up and brushing his hands off on his pants. "That looked an awful lot like an Emma smile to me mate, and I ain't seen one of those in months." The man gives him a knowing smirk and Killian just rolls his eyes.
"You're way too nosy for your own good."
Will shoves his hands in his pockets and bounces a little on his heels. "Ah so it was Emma." He grows somber then, and gives Killian a sympathetic smile. "How's she doing?"
Killian sighs and rubs a hand along his jaw. This whole ordeal makes his chest ache and his heart heavy. It's not just that she was in an accident and has to deal with the pain and burden of her physical injuries healing, but she has to deal with a type of healing that's going to be way more taxing on her emotionally than anything, and it's a type of healing that no one can know for certain how long it will last.
He can only try to imagine what she's feeling and what she's going through at the moment.
"She's much the same. Doctor says it will be a few days before she can leave the hospital."
Will nods in understanding and looks off at the boats bobbing in the harbor for a moment before he turns back to Killian. "Ever think that this accident might be a good thing?"
Killian narrows his eyes and feels his fingers twitch before he gives in and curls them into fists. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" He has to spit the words through his teeth and he hopes Scarlet can hear just how dangerous the territory he's treading on is. "She could have died. She almost died! And now on top of that she has no bloody recollection of anything from the last year at least. Please, Scarlet, enlighten me on how this is a good thing."
He must have taken a step forward without realizing it because Will takes a couple of quick steps backwards, his hands coming up and his palms facing outward in a placating motion. "Whoa there mate. All I meant was perhaps this is a good thing because it brought her back into your life."
Killian stops advancing forward but he doesn't relax, every single one of his muscles tensed as he tries to keep his anger in check. "This is hardly the circumstances I'd wish for her to return in."
"I know. But I mean she'll get her memories back eventually, right? And then she'll be here and maybe you can get some answers, get some closure about why she left. And bloody hell you need it, Jones. You've been nothing but a miserable sod since the day she left."
"Yeah, well…"Killian murmurs, shoving his hands in his pockets. He deflates as the anger leaves him, pierced by the reminder that she left in the first place. If he wasn't good enough for her then, who's to say that's going to change now? "I'm not expecting anything out of this. What happens when she gets her memories back is entirely her choice. Should she choose to leave again without any closure as you put it—I'm going to respect that."
"That's a bit of a grim way to look at it, innit?"
"I'm doing this because I…I care about her. Not because I expect anything."
"You're a good man, Jones." Will squeezes his shoulder, and though it's a gesture that's supposed to comfort him, Killian can't even smile in return. Will must sense Killian's need to change the subject because when he continues speaking there is a little more pep in his tone than is usual for the man. "You've got a tour coming up in bit. I'll help you get Jolly Roger ready."
Killian releases a frustrated breath and runs a hand through his already mussed hair. A tour. He completely forgot.
"Uh actually…" Killian slings an arm around Will's shoulders and begins walking the man towards a completely different ship than his beloved Jolly Roger. "You have a tour in a bit and you're not taking the Jolly."
"Oh no, no, no. I actually don't." Will counters, pulling to a stop and ducking out from under Killian's arms. "I took your last tour. This one's staying yours, mate."
Killian sighs. "I promised Emma I would be at the hospital in an hour. I need you to take this one."
With an exaggerated groan, Will throws his head back and starts walking backwards towards the ship he had just barely tied to the docks mere minutes ago, pointing his finger at Killian as goes. "You owe me, Jones. Now go be with your lady friend."
In all honesty, he really could use an hour or more out at sea. Let the wind and the salt clear his head and lift his spirits. But he knows if he went his heart wouldn't really be in it. Not with Emma lying in a hospital bed.
So Killian raises a hand in thanks before her turns and begins the short walk to his car.