CSI: Konoha

Case of the Surrealist

Shikamaru stood in the rain among the crowds, all dressed in black, heads bowed under umbrellas.

Glancing up at the large stone at the head of the crowd, he read the name carved into the rock for the hundredth time that day.

Nara Temari.

Wife, Sister, Mother, Beloved Friend, and Loyal Ninja.

A tear formed in his eye, and it fell on top of the head of a now-sleeping baby.

His baby.

Komadori, or Robyn.

Somehow, it fit her.

She had curly blonde hair, a smooth face, and the most infectious laugh.

Her eyes were green like her mother's, and Shikamaru could already tell that she would have an attitude like his.

Suddenly, Shikamaru felt a vibration on his hip.

He looked down.

It was his pager.

Picking it up, he glanced at the small letters running across the screen:

NEW CASE MRDRD CVLN CNT FGRE OUT COME ASAP CRME LB

Meeting eyes with Kiba and Sakura, they nodded.

He snuck over to where Naruto and Hinata were standing, whispered something in their ears, and then carefully gave Komadori to them.

---

When Shikamaru and his team arrived at the scene, they found cops and medics swarming around the room.

And then they spotted the victim.

Hey lay on a giant canvas, splattered with paint.

No obvious patterns were present on that canvas; it was merely a battlefield of bright colors.

Shaking his head, Shikamaru glanced around the room.

It was a normal garage- tools lined the walls, a bike rack stood in a corner.

Nothing unusual, except for the giant canvas and dead man point blank in the middle of it all.

"Ayuda Zloto, critic for Konoha Flair magazine," Kiba identified him as, holding up a wallet and a business card.

"Revenge maybe?" Sakura suggested. "Someone could've gotten reviewed by Mr. Ayuda, but didn't like his critique of them. So they killed him."

"Perhaps…" Shikamaru replied, now examining the body.

"Isn't this weird? The poor man's been completely painted over from head to toe," he observed.

Suddenly, Shikamaru' eyes grew narrow and he pulled out a swab.

Running it under the man's left index fingernail, he explained,

"Look at the red substance under his fingernail. It's darker and thinner than the red paint, which also has air bubbles."

Taking out a small vial of liquid, Shikamaru poured a drop on to the swab. The substance turned blue.

"We've got ourselves some blood. Our killer missed a spot."

"Everyone's a critic," replied Sakura with a smile.

---

Walking through the halls of the CSI office, Shikamaru felt in his element once again.
"Sakura, bring that blood swab to Rukia. I want a computer scan done on it; see if we can find a match."
"Kiba, gather a squad of maybe two others, bring cameras, and do a sweep of the house. We might be able to find some more clues."
"Got it!" the two said in unison.

---

"Anything yet?" Shikamaru asked, walking into the morgue.
"Well... "began Myco Hemoda, the man in charge of examining all the dead bodies.
Shikamaru shivered. Not his kind of job. Important, but a little bit creepy.
"No signs of blunt force trauma; no stab or cut wounds. Not even a single trace of poison."
Considering this, Shikamaru began pacing around.
"So what's left? Suffocation? Did you check the..."
Hemoda sighed.
"Yes, I checked the lungs for any traces of carbon dioxide; none. I swabbed around the neck, and found no fingerprints. However, I did notice a faint blue line on the neck, running across the Adam's apple."
Shikamaru looked up.
"That sounds like my Shadow Neck Bind jutsu. Which means..."
Hemoda finished his sentence. "The murderer is either someone in the Nara clan, or someone with the Sharingan."

--

Shikamaru just couldn't believe it.
Someone from the Nara clan, his clan, his family, could've done it.
Or someone with the Sharingan, and that narrowed down to three people: Uchiha Sasuke, Uchiha Itachi, and Hatake Kakashi.
Not the kind of guys you want to mess with.
"But, can you clear my name?"
"Of course. I've dated the time of death at around 10:30 this morning."
"And I was at the funeral! And there are only about 150 eye witnesses to prove that also! Thanks Hemoda! You're great!"
He shrugged.
"That's what I'm paid for."

---

Kiba struggled with a dumpster lid outside of Zloto's house.
"Care to help guys?" he asked angrily, to the two other cops that were supposed to be assisting him.
They shook their heads.
"Nah, you're doing fine."
Kiba glared at them angrily, mentally giving them each a demerit.
He whistled.
Barking, Akamaru leapt up from the ground, biting the lid and swinging it back.
Kiba grunted, pleased.
Taking a flashlight, he scanned the insides of the dumpster.
"Aha!" he cried out.
Curious, the two cops came over to the dumpster and looked in, and immediately regretted it.
Inside was a white haired, deformed boy, lying dead on the floor.
Motioning to the two cops, Kiba picked up the boy from inside the dumpster and placed him on the ground.
Grimacing, he took a look at the kid.
His whole body was deformed, but not naturally.
His body parts had been cut off and replaced in weird places, like some creepy Picasso portrait.
"Someone had a little fun with our victim," Kiba observed.
Then he observed one last detail.
The boy had the Sharingan wheel in his right eye.

---

Kakashi stood over the deformed body of the boy.
The lights of the morgue shined down on his face, throwing shadows around and adding an eerie feeling to the already-creepy room.
A tear fell from Kakashi's eye on to the cold table on which the body had been set down.
He rarely cried, but this was a time when you couldn't blame him.
Hatake Raikorou read the label attached to the boy's body.
Kakashi's own son.

--

Looking in through the glass, Shikamaru sighed.
Another life taken.
Another life wasted.
Raikorou had been a good kid.
Smart, strong, funny, and popular.
He had inherited Kakashi's Sharingan eye, even though Kakashi had his own pinwheel eye surgically inserted.
And what had happened to him...
It was just too terrible for words.
Shikamaru would make sure that the Surrealist would regret the day he picked up a paint brush.

But for now, Shikamaru had unsolved business.
He took one last look through the glass at the two Hatake's, one alive and one dead, and walked away.

---

Hokage Tsunade and Naruto were talking in whispered voices when Shikamaru entered the hospital room.
He took a look around, and then sat down with them.
There were four patients in the room.
Hyuuga Hinata, Yuaka Nao, Buwara Juni, and Natarumi Tala.
The four victims of the case that had left the whole CSI team, as well as the rest of the village, with a heavy heart.
And had resulted in four ninjas badly injured and in comas, and one ninja dead.
The Case of the Five-Point Abductions.
"So... how's it going with them?" asked Shikamaru, breaking the uncomfortable silence.
"They're all stable, no problems. All wounds have healed..." said Naruto.
"And..." Tsunade told him, "We believe there is a way to wake them up."

--

Shikamaru did a double take.
"Wake them up? But... but how?"
Tsunade explained.
"There's a special medical procedure that can be used to give an extra bit of energy to a person, or in our case, wake them up from a coma."
"A chakra transplant," continued Naruto. "We need one person for each patient. We'll take the person's chakra and insert it directly into the patient's heart, giving them a jump start and hopefully waking them up."
"There are of course risks," Tsunade chimed in. "As with any other transplant, this procedure must be executed with great caution."
Shikamaru considered this.
"Sounds like a plan. I say we go ahead with it. Do we have donors?"
"Yes, of course. Naruto has volunteered for Hinata, and we have two ninja coming from Suna to transplant for Nao and Juni. Nao's brother and Juni's husband, I believe. But Tala hasn't had anyone volunteer for her. That may prove a problem."
"I'll do it," Shikamaru offered.
He had begun to feel an attachment to the four victims. As if they were his responsibility.
It was the least he could do.
Tsunade nodded.
"Thanks. We'll begin the operation right after you finish this murder case."
"Go get 'em, bud!" Naruto told him.
Shikamaru smiled, and then walked out of the room.

---

Kiba and Sakura were scanning the inside and outside of the dumpster for any clues.
Brushing the whole dumpster with a special dust, they looked around.
"Hey, look at this!" Kiba exclaimed, coughing.
Ironically, Kiba was allergic to dust.
Scrutinizing the place Kiba was pointing to, Sakura found what it was.
An entire hand print was on the wall of the dumpster.
"You know, I think our murderer is a bit careless," she noted.
Kiba grunted, then coughed.
"Let's just get this hand print so we can get out of this dump."
Sakura nodded, and then reached into her pack for supplies.

---

Later that afternoon, Rukia was busy running tests when Shikamaru walked in.
Not even glancing up at him, she threw some stapled papers at his feet.
Picking them up, Shikamaru glared at her.
He waved them in the air.
She swiveled around in her chair and apologized.
"Sorry, I had to finish up one more test. It should be printing out right about... now."
Humming, the printer shot out another four papers, filled to the brim with data.
"Let's see... can I have my other papers back?"
Shikamaru gave them to her.
"Ahh... I see. The blood from under the fingernails are a match for a Ms. Naburu Uyino. To back it up, I ran a fingerprint through the system. We found a match, and it's also Ms. Naburu. I did a bit of research. She lives down in Konoha's East Side."
Shikamaru smiled. Things were looking up.
"I think I'm going to need a warrant."

---

Ino strode into Central Park with a picnic basket and a smile on her face.
Setting her stuff down on the side of a fountain, she looked around.
No Chouji.
They had planned to meet that afternoon.
And he was late, as usual.
Ino walked over to a man who was sitting on a bench a few yards away from the fountain.
He sat, back arched, head on his fist.
Just like that one sculpture... oh, what was it called?
Oh, yeah, the Thinker.
She smiled. The things you remember from your childhood.
No real use in life, but they were fun.
Ino went up to the man and tapped him on the shoulder.
"Excuse me mister, have you by any chance seen... eek!"
The man fell over on to the ground.
He was dead.

---

Shikamaru looked around at the small apartment in which Naburu Uyino lived.
It was small, but cozy, and looked like it had been through a hurricane, tornado, and frat party, all at once.
Uyino sat on the couch, giving her alibis to Kiba.
So far, they had been checking out quite well.
She had been away in the Land of Snow at an art exhibit.
Peeking into one of the rooms, Shikamaru discovered a small studio, filled with paints and pencils and other art supplies.
Walking around in it, he found a door leading off into an additional room.
Inside were a bed, dressers, and a desk.
But, unlike the rest of the apartment, it was perfectly clean.
"If you mind me asking, whose exhibit was it?" Shikamaru said, returning to the living room.
"Mine, I'm a resident artist. I usually do 3 dimensional figures, but sometimes I do paintings, and I've been working on some sketches for an upcoming sculpture."
"May I ask what the extra room is for?"
"Oh, that's my roommate, who is also my assistant. I'm training her to be an artist, but it's hard for her. I actually haven't seen her in about 3 days."
"That's around the time when the first murder came around in this case," Kiba whispered to Shikamaru.
He nodded.
"Ms. Naburu, can you be kind enough to tell me what your assistant's name is?"
"Pahu Laona."
"Thank you very much. We appreciate it."
Suddenly, Shikamaru's pager began buzzing.
He picked it up.
"INO REPORTED NEW MRDR- SREALST WE SUSPCT: CNTRL PRK, NEAR FNTAIN"
Glancing at Kiba, he said, "We gotta go."
Nodding, Kiba turned to Uyina.
"Thanks for your time. We'll contact you if we get a lead, or find where your assistant is." And with that, they both ran out of the apartment.

---

Hemoda walked around the body of the latest victim.
Slipping on plastic gloves, he picked up a scalpel and cut into the man's chest.
Taking out the heart, Hemoda jotted down notes on a piece of paper.
Now, Hemoda turned on a small flashlight and shone it into each eye.
He took a piece of hair from the man's head and dropped it into a test tube.
Finally, he took a bowl of ink, dipped the man's fingertips in it, and then pressed them onto a piece of paper.

---

Shikamaru sat at his desk in his office, surrounded by the rest of his team.
Sakura and Rukia reclined on a leather couch.
Kiba sat backwards on a chair, his arms hanging over the backrest.
All of them had bags under their eyes; it had been a long day.

Suddenly, the door flew open and Hemoda strode into the room.
He held a stack of papers in his hand.
"Okay, now that we're all here, let's take a look at what we have," Shikamaru proposed.
The rest of them nodded.
"Well, our victim is a John Doe. I couldn't find any identification on him, and the fingerprints didn't match anyone on the system," Hemoda began.
"And I analyzed a piece of skin that Hemoda found on the man's body. It was a match to a piece of hair on a brush Kiba brought back from Ms. Naburu's house. The brush belonged to Pahu Laona," Rukia continued.
"But I did manage to figure out the cause of death. The man died of a heart attack," finished Hemoda, breathless.
Sakura looked puzzled.
"But that's not the style of the Surrealist. The cause of death couldn't have been natural."
"It wasn't. I checked the stomach, and found traces of a poison. A poison, that if ingested, causes immense stress on the heart, and may even result in a heart attack."
Kiba added in, "And we found a sandwich wrapper on the ground next to the bench where our John Doe was found. So, our killer took some poison, put some into the sandwich, and waited."

--

Suddenly, Shikamaru's phone rang.
Picking it up, he listened to the voice on the other end of the line.
Then, pressing the disconnect button, he stood up.
"It seems that someone resembling Laona was spotted about 50 miles east, at an abandoned woodyard."

"Kiba, Sakura, you're coming with me. Hemoda, Rukia, good job. You guys stay here and try to find any more evidence."
They nodded.
Kiba smiled.
"Road trip!"

---

Taking a swig of water, Shikamaru looked around at the woodyard.
Onnin Takasala Woodyard, the sign read.
"So this is the place," Kiba remarked, peering around at the abandoned hellhole.
Shikamaru nodded.
"Be careful. This Pahu Laona may be dangerous, so be on the watch."
Both Kiba and Sakura nodded, and then each took out a handgun.
Loading it, they looked over at Shikamaru.
He upholstered two guns from his belt.
They were dark black, with a single gold stripe running down each side.
And a golden crane carved into the metal.
Shikamaru loaded them, and then nodded at Kiba and Sakura.
Readying themselves, they slowly walked into the woodyard.

--

The woodyard had been abandoned years ago as soon as the last tree in the forest fell.
Now, the area around it was completely cleared out.
While it had been running, the woodyard had been a busy and sweaty place.
And now it looked like it had been inhabited once again.

---

A tall, dark figure sat in a chair in the main office of the woodyard.
She stared at the video camera feeds displayed on the TV's in the office.
On the screen of TV#3 were two men and a women with guns. They all had police vests and badges on.
"The game has begun."

---

As the trio stepped into the woodyard, Shikamaru instantaneously noticed three things.
First, the video cameras mounted everywhere.
Next, the abundance of cranes, hooks, and machines.
And finally, the almost-invisible wires stretched out two inches above the ground.
But he noticed the last one too late.
"Stop!" Shikamaru cried, but to no avail.
Sakura had tripped over one of the wires, setting off a trap.
Dozens of senbon and kunai flew from a hole in the wall, right towards the group.
Jumping up, Kiba grabbed a windmill shiriken from his pack and pushed himself in the way of the projectiles.
He opened up the giant four-leaved blade and spun it around his hand, using it as a shield.
The blades and needles bounced off the rotating surface and dropped harmlessly to the ground.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Kiba put the shiriken back in his pack.
"Thank you Kiba," said Shikamaru. "We must be careful around here. There are probably traps hidden in all corners of this woodyard."
"I'll make sure to keep an eye out for wires, but they're extremely hard to see."
Kiba smiled.
"I'll take care of that."
Reaching back into his pack, Kiba pulled out a small whistle and blew on it.
One second... two seconds...
Then, a barking noise came from the entrance.
A small white dog ran into the woodyard and leaped on top of Kiba's head.
"I see Akamaru has woken up from his nap on the trip here," Sakura noted with a smile.
Kiba whispered something into Akamaru's ear, then the small dog jumped on top of the piles of wood and began running around.
While spraying dog piss everywhere.
"Now we should be able to see the wires. However, I can't do anything about the smell."

--

The group carefully made their way around the woodyard, avoiding the wires.
They only had two other incidents along the way.
Nevertheless, all three of them were scratched up and panting heavily.

"Well, let's continue on. Pahu Laona must be around here somewhere. Be extra careful. And keep an eye out for more traps," Shikamaru told them.
Suddenly, a storm of senbon flew towards them.
They all managed to jump away, and the needles embedded themselves where they had been standing previously.
Confused, Sakura looked to the floor.
"Where did that come from? Did we set off another trap?"
"No," Shikamaru replied, grim faced.
He pointed to a platform above the ground.
And the woman standing upon it.
"Hello my friends. I have been waiting for you. What do you think of my idea for a new piece? I'm thinking of a Cerberus statue, staring you three."
Akamaru barked.
"Pahu Laona, you're under arrest."
"Oh, so I'm under arrest now? How fun!"
Shikamaru scowled.
"But unfortunately, I'll have to take a rain check. I have a piece of art to create."
Then, she took out more senbon and threw them.
Shikamaru threw himself out of the way.
When he got up again, he helped up Kiba.
Looking around, his eyebrows narrowed.
"Kiba, where is Sakura?"

--

"Hello, my friends," said a voice behind them.
Shikamaru and Kiba spun around.
"Sakura!" Kiba began to walk forward, but Shikamaru put his arm out and stopped him.
"Wait. Look at her eyes."
Kiba obliged, and discovered what Shikamaru was talking about.
She had black eyes.
"Wha? But how?"
"Mind Body Switch Technique. The same way she took control of young Raikorou, then used his abilities to kill Zloto."
Laona laughed a high pitched screech that hurt Shikamaru's ears.
Or more like Sakura laughed.
"So we have a clever one, eh?"
"Well, I guess you could call me clever, if that's what an IQ of 200 means," Shikamaru retorted bitterly.
She laughed again.
"I suggest you don't try to mess with me. I'm going to bring my art to the whole world! And everyone will love it!"
Kiba scowled.
"You call murdering defenseless people 'art'?"
She frowned.
"They were nothing. Merely pawns in the game that is the real world."
"Well, if this is a game, I think it's checkmate on you."
Suddenly, she took a kunai out of a holder on Sakura's leg, then stabbed herself with it in the stomach.
And Sakura fell over, blood pouring from her wound.
"Sakura!" Kiba yelled, running forward.
A kunai whizzed past his ear, burying itself in the wood behind him.
Two inches closer and he would've been a goner.
Shikamaru turned around and looked at Kiba.
And laughed.

--

"Shit!" thought Kiba, pulling the kunai out of the wood and spinning it around his finger.
He looked around and observed his surroundings.
"There's nothing that can help you," said Luana in Shikamaru's body.
Kiba smiled.
"Maybe..." he said, not really paying attention.
Luana's smile turned to a frown.
"Well, if you're not going to do anything, then you might as well die!"
She rushed him, katana in hand.
Kiba threw his kunai at her.
Luana deflected the kunai with one blade and sliced at Kiba with the other.
He jumped up and swung his foot at her head.
She ducked and turned around.
Making hand signs, she shouted, "Fire Style: Phoenix Flower Jutsu!"
"Crap!" Kiba yelled.
So Luana could use her own techniques as well as Shikamaru's in his body.
That was a twist for the worst.
He took out senbon and threw them, piercing most of the balls of fire.
But some of them missed, and he ended up with a burn on his leg and arm.
Panting, he landed back on the ground.
"Got you now!" shouted Luana, jumping at him with katana bared.
Kiba fumbled with another kunai and tried to throw it.
But he couldn't.
The Luana in the air vanished in a poof of smoke.
A shadow clone.
"See, I told you that I got you," said a voice behind him.
Kiba managed to turn his head to see what it was.
Luana in Shikamaru's body, with the shadow stretched out, touching his.
Kiba swore.
"Now, I can dispose of you both at once," she said with an evil grin.
Taking out a kunai, she pointed it to her chest.
Shikamaru's chest.
And, with no option but to, Kiba did the same.
"You were a good opponent. But I'm afraid I'll still have to kill you and your friends nevertheless," she said.
And then positioned the kunai towards the heart.

--

Kiba shut his eyes for the final blow.
He couldn't bare to watch himself being controlled into a suicide.
A tear fell from his eye and rolled down his cheek.
Shikamaru... and Sakura... and all the other future victims...
He couldn't save them if he couldn't save himself.
Luana cackled.
"Good bye, CSI freak!"
She stabbed towards the heart.
But was stopped.
A small white blur jumped across the room and bit Shikamaru's arm.
"Arf!" barked Akamaru.
Kiba smiled.
The dog dragged Shikamaru down to the ground, breaking the Shadow Imitation Jutsu.
Shikamaru's head crashed to the ground, knocked him unconscious, and forced Luana back into her own body.
Luana's body, lying on the ground on the other side of the yard, suddenly gasped for air.
Kiba wiped the blood from his mouth, and walked over Luana.
"Checkmate," he said.
Placing his foot on her chest to keep her down, he took a pair of handcuffs from his pack.
"Pahu Luana, you're under arrest. You have the right to keep silent; everything you say can and will be used against you in court..."

---

Back in Konoha, Shikamaru, Kiba, and Sakura were being treated for wounds endured during their skirmish with Luana.
Sakura needed serious treatment for her stab wound, as well as other cuts and bruises from the traps at the woodyard.
Now she was sleeping quietly with bandages wrapped around her chest to stop further bleeding.
Shikamaru was now reading in bed, still not discharged.
And Kiba was keeping them both company.
He had been released with a twisted ankle and a few minor scrapes.
Tsunade and Naruto walked into their hospital room carrying three bowls of spicy ramen.
"Knock knock," said Tsunade, placing the bowls on a table.
"Thought you guys would get sick of hospital food pretty quickly, so we brought you some food that's actually edible."
Shikamaru looked up from his book and chuckled.
Kiba smiled.
"I heard you saved everyone," Tsunade praised, now turned to Kiba.
He shook his head.
"I would've been a goner had it not been for Akamaru."
Naruto laughed.
"Well, if that's the case, I'll just have to buy him a nice big tin of treats. I'm sure you wouldn't object."
Shikamaru put down his book and looked up at Tsunade.
"When's the...operation... going to be?" he asked, coughing.
She looked down at him.
"Not until you recover," she said, but then added, grim faced, "but no later."
Shikamaru nodded, and then went back to his book.
Shougi Strategies.