Chapter 2 Keep Your Stubborn Ass Alive

The next morning awakening to Lena and a strange woman talking in the room as if they were old friends left Kari feeling uneasy. Lena had rushed to her bedside spewing words like community and safe, it all seemed to come pouring out of her. Lena was clearly overjoyed but the woman standing at the foot of the bed sent Karis guard up. Her sister continued to talk enough for the both of them filling her in on their ride back after averting the herd and everyone she had met last night. Kari couldn't help but smile seeing her face full with such excitement, the sadness in her eyes that she wasn't letting out still lingered but hope shone through it. Something was forever hopeful in Lena, the world literally ended around her and she still managed to be hopeful. The woman who introduced herself as Deanna eventually asked Lena to step outside so she could interview Kari, apparently it was standard but it still didn't do much to ease the growing tension. When it was over she simply nodded thanked Kari for her honesty and said she would have a job for her at some point, with that she left.

Kari stood in the shower staring down as the dirt that had been caked unto her skin slowly darkened the water and slipped down the drain, the earthy smell that had become hers seemed to slip down the drain as well. She tried willing herself to cry now, to take her moment alone with the shower to cover her sobs; but the tears refused to come. After all she had been through she felt so heavy, and yet something in her was still clinging to everything that had happened. Her dark brown hair dripped small puddles unto the floor as she stepped out of the shower, staring at the stranger in the mirror. Her green eyes examined her thin toned body, bruised with a few small cuts on her throat and between her breasts where the wolf pressed just hard enough to break the skin. She dressed in the clean clothes they had left, a simple black tank and jeans that were a bit on the tight side.

"Just relax" She whispered as she exhaled. But she couldn't relax, couldn't shake the feeling that maybe she just didn't belong here.

Lena had eventually made her way in with some breakfast, continuously buzzing over how they could make a home here. It was as if she was trying to convince herself at the same time as Kari. It had been a long time since they had slept in a clean bed and had a decent meal, both seemed ease Lena slightly. Kari spent the rest of the day touring Kari around Alexandria, it really did seem like all they had said it would be; Kari had even been reluctantly introduced to a few people. Most making small talk and welcoming them easily enough; Jessie even mentioned how good her old jeans looked on them. As if those were the things you talked about now.

"I'm tired Lena, I'm going to go back and lay down." Even the sterile room is more comfortable than this.

Lena gave her an unconvinced look and attempted another distraction, she decided to mention the plans she had made for them both.

"You can't go lay down, we're expected at the Monroes for dinner." She said it matter of factly, as if it had been decided regardless of how Kari had felt.

"I'm not going Lena" Her voice was firm and that feeling of heaviness just seemed to intensify. "I can't just pretend the world is fine. That isn't how it works. You can't just leave what happened out there at the gate"

"You mean the way you left me out there? With people you didn't know. You're leaving that out just fine aren't you?" Her eyes were filling with tears, Lena had a way of bringing up anything that upset her when she wasn't getting her way. The world had gone to shit but somethings never change. She knew that guilt was a perfect way to manipulate someone into getting what she wanted.

"I was saving your life…again, I might add" The words had barely gotten out before Lena had turned and run off, she must've been dying to do that. It was something that had almost gotten her killed before, she had learned her lesson about running off in a dramatic fashion but apparently Alexandria had given that back to her as well. This time I'm not chasing you.

"You should go you know, even if it's just for a moment. Just for them to see you. You can brood there as easily as the infirmary." Aaron spoke calmly with a genuine smile. She found herself nodding in agreement.

As if to make sure her word was good he walked the whole way there with her, his small talk didn't seem as forced as the others. Something about this guy was sincere at least. He told her about his partner and how they met when he must have been able to tell she wasn't much for talking about herself, it made for a less awkward walk together.

Once they approached the stairs to the entrance Aaron turned to go, the perplexed look on her face must have spoken for itself. He took one look at the house then back at Kari. "We, Eric and I aren't much for these dinner parties, but everyone should try and find their place."

"What if I already know I don't belong in there" Staring at the brightly lit house, the sounds of the small gathering could be heard trailing off into the night. "I can't just pretend like out there isn't still the way it is. As happy as I am about being safe, all I can ever think about is guarding that safety. This world isn't about just living anymore its about surviving."

"You sound a little like Rick and the others. You're not the only one having trouble adjusting Kari, but you have to give this a chance. You have to give us a chance". He pressed his lips tightly as if finding the words. "Listen I know maybe Deanna's might be a bit too much tonight but try. If you can't handle it there then you can, well you should stop by our house at least. I promise you'll at least leave with a stomach" His reassuring smile and insistence made it hard for her to say no.

She had slipped into Deannas, attempting to remain unseen or at least unnoticed after the first greetings were out of the way. It was easy to let Lena do the talking, it was even easier to fade out shortly after she had arrived while her sister rattled on.

Kari found herself on Aarons doorstep, just as she was about to have doubts and walk away she forced herself to lightly knock on the door. The awkwardness at dinner seemed to fade away as Aaron and Eric made their own casual small talk, letting her add in when she felt comfortable. Something about these two was unquestioning and welcoming, it put her at ease more than anything she had found today.

"Thank you for dinner...I'm not much of a dinner guest but it was, well it was nice to talk to someone other than my sister." At least the much was true. Aaron had stood to walk her to the door but as she stepped out and said her goodbye she noticed Daryl waiting at the bottom of the stairs.

"They're lookin' for you, Ricks got some questions for you. Not like Deanna just somethin' else." Daryl turned to go not leaving her much option but to follow.

"How did you know where to find me?" She asked curiously noting how he was unsurprised to find her there.

"Tried the same thing when I got here, think they got a soft spot for the damaged." Blunt and to the point, Daryl was someone she was able to get her head around, everyone else seemed to have ulterior motives.

"So I'm damaged goods then?" He shook his head at her knowing she had gotten his meaning. "Should I be worried about these questions? Aaron told me others have been turned away before. I don't think Lena could handle leaving, she thinks this place is perfect." She watched him to see if his features would betray anything he was hiding but if there was anything Kari couldn't see it.

"Nah ain't nothing wrong, just be honest. None of 'em expect you to be like your sister, hell we aint like the people here we're just tryin' ta make it work." She knew what he meant by "we" their group hadn't been in Alexandria long and the difference between the two was as noticeable as the difference between Lena and herself. The things you did out there, they change you more and more, warped you into something else.

As they approached a small fire she noticed most of the group crowding in, Deanna stood behind Rick as if trying to portray who was really in charge. Rick motioned to a seat across from him and Daryl broke away to stand beside him. Kari walked to the seat he had motioned to as Lena took the one beside her she seemed completely at ease.

"How many walkers have you killed?" Rick made sure to look each of them in the eye when he asked and his expression remained neutral, Lena shifted uncomfortably.

"A few" Lena's voice was almost as low as a whisper, she remembered those few all too well. Kari recalled her sister almost breaking down as they both helped their Father put them down. She didn't speak for days after that until we met Ivan and his group, it was almost as if even looking at me reminded her of what she had done and what I had done.

"A lot, I lost count…I lost a count a long time ago." Kari didn't remember them all that much was true. After they escaped the refugee camp some of the memories were just a blur of running, slashing and blood. She kept her eyes locked on Ricks refusing to back away from these questions, Lena needed this place.

"How many people have you killed?" His voice didn't change and again his eyes and expression didn't betray any emotion.

"None" Lena regained her composure to this question but looked to her sister worriedly.

"Five…no six. Six as of yesterday." She remembered every one of those, but didn't regret any of them. I did what had to be done, I couldn't make apologies for surviving. Not anymore. The wolves were the most recent but the first man she had killed, he seemed like only yesterday. If anyone was surprised by her answer they didn't show it. Rick just nodded and moved on.

"Why?" It seemed like all eyes were on her, even Lena seemed to be waiting for an answer as if she was oblivious to the reasons.

"They…" Hesitating, looking to Lena who's waiting stare didn't offer any form of protest. "One did something terrible to my sister, the rest it was us or them. They wanted everything we had including our lives." Ricks stare never faltered he just nodded again as if nothing more would have to be said. Just like with Deannas she didn't know if those were the right answers, or if there were a right answers. The way Rick and Deanna disappeared together said she wouldn't have to wait too long to find out. Kari must have been staring after them in her own world because she barely heard Maggie ask about the bow.

"How'd you get so good with a bow, Aaron and Daryl both said it was something else. We could use a bit more meat around here, the haul they brought back with you two is only going to get us so far." Kari caught what she meant, they were just two more mouths to feed. They wanted to know if we could pull our weight. Lena must have caught on too because she did what she had always done best which was most of the talking.

"She can do game, if there is any around. Our Daddy taught her, said if he wasn't getting a son she was going to have to do. Saved us out there, until the dead got too close anyway". Lena always smiled when she told that story, something about being the only real daughter always left her with a sense of pride. At least it didn't make Kari didn't feel left out anymore, not much anyway if he hadn't taught her what he did they'd both be dead. "She used to be better with a gun but I don't know anymore, once she runs out of those arrows maybe she can learn the sword like Micho

nne"

Lena let out a small laugh trying to break the tension. Every group was the same Lena got to sell them on Kari skills and remain the innocent one. She's learned how to live but all I know is how to survive. Least I can do is make sure she gets to stay. She needs this.

Kari managed to sneak away during one of Lena's more amusing stories about the times before everything happened. She hadn't gotten far before she could hear voices talking quietly, away from the rest of the group. Attempting to mind her own business she kept walking until Daryls distinct voice caught her ear. Something about his defensive tone made her want to listen in, despite good intentions she found herself wandering closer to the voices trying her best to keep silent in the shadows hidden behind a corner.

"It ain't right Rick and you know it" Darryl didn't sound angry just irritated by whatever it was they were talking about.

"I know Daryl, I don't like it either but we just have to ride this one out, if she's as good as you say it won't be a problem. We have to pick and choose our battles here we can't go causing more problems just yet, we have to take care of our family right now."

It sounded like Rick with his distinct accent.

That was all Kari needed to hear to know this was never her business in the first place, family was family and she wouldn't judge anyone for putting that first. As she turned to back away from the corner she was hidden behind she groaned inwardly at the large thud that was made when she backed into whatever she had misjudged her distance from. With barely a glance she righted the trash can she had backed into then tried her best to seem casual as she walked off.

Kari calmed herself formulating an explanation or at least an apology in her mind the second she heard the footsteps trailing her. Rick was a decent enough guy, Kari figured if she explained it was partially unintentional he might let her off without telling Deanna. That woman seemed to have enough issues with new comers already. The smell of grease, sweat and oil threw her and all the pre-thought explanations went out the window when Daryls rough hand gripped her arm.

"How much of that did ya hear?" It was dark and there wasn't much light where they stood but it was clear enough to see his unaccusing look was the same as always and there wasn't any anger in his tone.

"Enough to guess it was me you were talking about and enough to know I'm not going to like my new "job". Also enough to know it isn't any of my business I didn't mean to listen in, I just heard-"

"Don't matter, jus' stay alive out there. Don't go far and don't be stupid. Ain't right what they're gunna ask but the more you keep walking away the easier it is to push you out." Kari furrowed her brow at the walking away comment, how could this guy be telling her about walking away from what she heard he spent most of his time on the road since they arrived. Not that she wasn't grateful for that if it wasn't for him or Aaron they'd never have gotten here. "Seeing you with everyone, it ain't no secret you'd rather be anywhere else. But you keep pushing everyone away they ain't going to let you in either. Everyone needs to be in it together or none of us are going survive."

"I don't see you huddled around that fire" Kari snapped before finding herself again. "Besides it gets old hearing Lena ramble on all the time. I try and take advantage of the times she has someone else to talk to." Or when she's pissed off enough not to talk to me. Kari looked up at him as he shifted his weight as if unsure of what to say, his eyes almost seemed empathetic for a moment.

"I made my family before we got here, they don't need me there. Ain't no one but Lena know you here and by the right of it she don't really know you anymore."

Wise words. Lena really didn't know her anymore, no one did. Somehow Daryl had managed to sum her up in a matter of a few days, I really have gone simple. She tried to think her way out of it for a moment but the honest answer was, he was right. "Alright, I'll try it your way. But if I'm duller than Lena I'm telling everyone they can blame you." The small smirk he showed would've seemed out of character if it didn't fade so quickly.

"They already blame me for bringing her back, damn girl doesn't shut up" She didn't have to force a smile for that, as serious as Daryl seemed he apparently did have a semblance of humour left in him. He turned to walk away with that same triumphant smirk he had given before, as if he had done his good deed for the day.

"So you really are going to make me go back there alone after that speech?" Kari quirked a brow in challenge. Something about Daryl made it easier to talk to him, she never thought she'd want a friend out here but if she did it would've been someone like Daryl. He shrugged slightly as he turned back and walked past her, stopping for a moment as if to ask if she was coming. It took a few quick steps for her to catch up then she slowed her pace to his, mildly surprised that he came back.

As they rejoined the group around the small fire she listened intently as everyone told their own stories about their life on the road or their time before. Only a few of the original Alexandrians had stayed so it was mostly Ricks group reminiscing about those they lost or those near escapes that had come so suddenly in these days.

Then the moment Kari had stressed about came around, it was innocent enough Carl just wanted to know how they had made it until this point. Couldn't blame the kid for his curiosity, actually had to admire it. For as grown as he seemed occasionally there was a bit of kid in him. It must have seemed strange two women wandering on their own since almost the beginning. Karis eyes darted to Lena, she never could talk about it, she clammed up the minute it turned to those parts of our shared past.

"Dad kept us alive through most of it, he always knew what he was doing. He acted like they were just another animal you could avoid or hunt. He was born for a world like this and he did his best to make sure we were too." Kari stared blankly into the fire when she spoke, it wasn't the most personal way to talk to them but looking someone in the face and talking about him just wasn't something she was ready for and she couldn't just sit by and watch Lena shut down.

"I'd have like to met him, he sounds like quite the father." Rick had patted Carl lightly on the shoulder as he spoke.

"What about after then? How'd you make it without him?" Carls innocent questions were getting harder to answer but you could tell by his look it wasn't an interrogation to him he was entirely curious about other survivors and helping them.

Kari didn't look to Lena this time, she wouldn't say a word about after they lost Pops. She liked to go on trying to convince herself some of this never happened. Kari got ready to recite the vague story she always had whenever this conversation came up but just as she opened her mouth a raspy voice spoke first.

"She's too damn stubborn to die, my guess is she dragged the other one along until we found 'em" Daryl wasn't entirely wrong, Kari had dragged Lena her fair share since they lost him. "Couldn't even get her off my damn bike"

"I told you I wasn't jumping out of a car." He just shook his head to that and kept fiddling with his crossbow.

"You think you're good enough to shoot from the back of a bike?" Carl asked with a small amount of excitement.

"I think, well I knew I stood a better shot than in a car where I couldn't even get the bow out the window. Should always have an exit strategy Dad said. A lot easier to jump off a bike if its slowed enough than jump out a car. You can't shoot from either though, not with a bow anyway. Especially not with the way he rides." Kari didn't know how the words were forming so easily but she let them flow, if she wanted Lena to make a home here Daryl was right. "If I had a gun Daryl would've had to do without the pleasure of my company"

"That and she's always had a thing about speed. Normally its cars though, remember tha-" Kari shot Lena a warning look, no one needed to know much about our lives before all this; what mattered was here and now. She was always looking for a reason to bring up that stupid story from high school.

"Makes sense Daryl couldn't shake her off then, I think he tries to leave the rest of us rattled enough that we won't want to ride with him again." Michonne interrupted, Karis pursed lips formed into a smile for her, grateful for her moving the conversation away.

They all sat like that for an hour or more, Kari was able to observe most of it rather than taking part. Everyone seemed satisfied with what she had shared and she was grateful that no more was asked. Baby steps, these people really weren't like the others. Everyone else was constantly weighing and measuring what use you could be, like Deanna.

Lena had stood to head to their new house when Carter offered to walk her there, Kari knew better than to protest. Lena always had a way with men, and her heart always had a way of rebounding. When Kari stood and turned to leave something pulled at her, something nagged at her to thank these people, these strangers who had welcomed them and only asked that they welcome them in return.

"I…"She didn't know what she wanted to say but she opened her mouth and the words came. "We wanted to thank you, but I know there isn't anything I could say or that I could do to try and repay what you did by bringing us here. But I…We wanted you to know we are grateful, it isn't every day you find salvation." The words seemed right so she left them at that and nodded to Rick and the others in a sense of understanding.

Everyone filed out at the same time so she wasn't put off by the steps behind her until they came up at her side. Knowing it was Daryl before he even spoke she carried on as if she hadn't noticed him walking beside her.

"Thanks for saving me back there, I don't really know what to say about the time after we lost him." Kari didn't need to look at him to know he was listening or to know that he had followed her for a reason. There was obviously something he wanted to get off his chest.

"You shouldn't let your sister do all the talking you know, ya ain't half bad at it. People believe you b'fore they believe her." Kari didn't really know what to say so she found herself staring at him, his hair the same as always almost slicked against his head with the grease you'd see from someone on the road, his eyes set ahead. They had reached the house Lena and her were supposed to share she still wasn't sure why he had trailed her here or if that was all he had to say but she knew what needed to be said.

"Thank you Daryl" He looked a little surprised by the sudden gratitude but she carried on. "I don't think I'd have went back if you hadn't said anything. I forget sometimes that there are good people out there. You should've been my first reminder of that the night you came back. Out there, it left me jaded, its hard to see the world beyond that." She tried her best to give a reassuring smile but had no idea if she just looked like an idiot or if he could tell she meant it. It was hard always thanking people, Kari felt like she had done more of that in the last day than her whole life.

"I know" was all he offered at first, then he looked down at her with that strange glint in his eyes "Stay alive out there, whatever happens tomorrow. Keep your stubborn ass alive" She could have sworn there was something else he wanted to say but he hesitated and she wasn't the type to push.

"I will" was all she could manage while looking at him, she realized she hadn't really given Daryl a thorough look over until then. His shaggy yet slicked down hair shaped around his face, the bit of stubble he left made him look rugged. Her face flushed with embarassment as she realized what she was doing, thankful at least for the cover of night, Kari tried to gather control of her senses once more "Thank you…" she blurted out and turned to rush up the stairs, barely taking a step before he cut in.

"You runnin' off so soon?" His casual stance made it hard to not be curious about what he had in mind.

"Why you got something else I should be getting into?" Kari answered having somewhat recovered from her momentary embarassment at least enough that she could look him in the face again. Her hand still gripped the railing but she had looked over her shoulder at him, she knew what awaited her inside the house. Lena was going to gushing over Carter already, it was her sister sad coping mechanism. Regardless of wether Lena was inside or still trying to woo her new love interest she felt she could use a distraction. So she didn't object when Daryl nodded towards the watchtower.

It was an easy night, they spent the night going over tracking and hunting. He was miles ahead of her as far as tracking went. Kari managed to hold her own with hunting but Dad had always tracked the game. She knew all about the best way to skin and clean, the dirty business as it was. His skills were obviously more valuable but he had never made it seem that way, he spent a lot of the night sharing what knowledge he could. It was obvious preparation for her new upcoming job.

Karis eyes had grown tired around the time that the sun was rising, she fought to stay awake not wanting to explain her absence to Lena. She knew she had lost that battle when her eyes slowly opened to the sound of voices.

"If there isn't anything there why'd you bring her up here? You were supposed to be resting up for the run later." Aarons soft voice was distinctive enough Kari knew it was him.

"I was trying to keep her alive today, ain't right what Deanna is going to ask her to do. Though you people ain't giving her much of an option are you. She feels like she has to do it and Deanna is just thinking about a way to feed everyone." There was still that hint of irritation as he spoke as if there was more he wanted to say.

Kari couldn't keep listening, the thought of what Deanna was going to ask today had already ran through her mind enough. She stretched stifling a yawn and hoping to interrupt their conversation.

"What exactly am I supposed to be doing today?" She blinked her eyes sleepily at the light coming through the lookout window. Aaron and Daryl exchanged glances as if neither wanted to say or weren't supposed to.

"They want you ta hunt, but they ain't sending you out with anyone yet. Supposed to be a test run. That'd be your new job. Keepin' us fed and training others to do the same. I do it now when I ain't on runs but apparently we need more, stupid risk if ya ask me." Darryl looked at her and this time she could tell it really was empathy in his eyes. Aaron just looked worried as if he were a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

It was understandable, runs alone weren't exactly a mission anyone jumped for, but why risk more lives for a maybe. Especially if you had a new mouth who could do it for you, a new mouth who wasn't entirely well received.

"Here I thought you people were trying to kill me, figured you had enough killers." She smiled trying to show her ease at the notion of going back out. "I'll hunt for you...well for us. I guess its us now" She managed trying to remember she was supposed to be trying to become a part of this.

Deanna found Kari on her way back, by the end of the conversation Kari found she was thanking her for the opportunity to carry her weight and was pleased with how surprised Deanna was by the fact she didn't seem upset. After that Kari had found her way back to the house that was going to be her home and prepared for Lena.

Kari hadn't felt tired until she had listened to her sister for a few minutes going on about Carter. She knew she should be more receptive, Lena was always trying to distract her even if sometimes that just meant making it all about her.

"Wait a minute, where were you all night?" It was if the thought had just dawned on her and she hadn't been concerned about it all night. It wasn't unlike her to get caught up in her flights of fancy and even try to distract herself with a new crush.

"Daryl and I took watch, he told me about a few things that might keep me alive today." Kari could see from the look in her sisters eyes and the grin on her face that she had other ideas of what had happened last night. "Its not like that Lena, he really did just help me. I fell asleep on watch or I'd have been here earlier" The fact the grin hadn't left Lenas face said she wasn't letting go of the idea.

"I'm not kidding, nothing happened. He's a friend." Kari attempted to make that the end of the conversation by changing into her old clothes hoping the lack of attention would drive Lena off. She just sat on the bed while Kari changed into the washed but stained clothes she had worn when they arrived. Lena looked thoughtfully at the tear in Karis shirt that hadn't been there before they were separated.

"He's not half bad you know, he's a bit older than you but he…he seems nice" Kari flashed her an annoyed look that let her know the conversation was over.

Half bad, that was an under statement as if she hadn't noticed what he looked like. Her mind flashed back to the night before when she had stared at him like an idiot, she could feel her face flush again. Kari tried to shake it off but that feeling of embarrassment stuck with her right up until the afternoon when she had gathered everything that was needed. Ideally she'd have already left when the sun came up as she had tried telling Deanna, she was insistent that today was only to see if there was anything worth risking lives to hunt for nearby. Kari didn't offer much protest, she had a feeling Deanna was going to get her way regardless of what was said. As she approached the gate and waited for Sasha to open it a familiar set of footsteps walked up beside her.

"I thought you were going out on a run?" Sasha hadn't opened the gate she was looking at him as if wondering if this was a good idea, it was plain that he hadn't asked anyone about coming along. Then again Darryl didn't ask about most things, he just went his way and that was that from what she'd seen.

"Aaron said we ain't leaving till tomorrow now, something about me not being rested." He nodded his head to Sasha and she started rolling open the gate, her face didn't look impressed but there wasn't much use arguing.

"Just don't slow me down then" Kari said jokingly, she wasn't going to complain. Although the idea of time alone was something she looked forward to, at the same time going out there alone without knowing what to expect was a stupid idea.

"I could track better than ya in my sleep girl" She shook her head lightly and smiled she couldn't say that wasn't true.

They circled around Alexandria for the day, there wasn't much conversation they both knew what noise would do; either drive off game or draw in walkers. Any of the walkers they came across got put down quickly, quietly and then they moved on.

When night came Kari offered to take watch, she knew he hadn't slept and on a more selfish level wanted the alone time. She didn't bother waking him for the next watch, instead she sat there inwardly reflecting on her losses; wallowing in self-pity. They had never stopped long enough to think after the refugee camp, every group they met up with just kept on moving and dying. Lena had grieved, Kari thought her sister had grieved enough for both of them and that had helped her to stifle the pain. But now here in the dark tears filled her eyes at the thought of her Mother, their first loss. Now all the tears she had summoned in vain earlier seemed to flood out, everything she had wanted to let go dragged itself painfully to the surface. She could feel her body almost trembling as she fought the images that came to her whenever she closed her eyes.

"No." Taking a few deep breaths she tried to refocus looking up at the few stars twinkling in between the treetops, she rested her head against the tree behind pulling her knees up to her chest and hugging them tightly. Push that all back down. A calm feeling was just starting when the memory of losing her Father came back, eyes open it didn't matter that was one memory that wouldn't be forced down. Kari remembered every detail from Lena shaking and sobbing while Kari tried her best to keep him calm, to feeling the warm blood seeping through the cloth she had held to his side. Just as she was about to remember the words that had haunted her since they were spoken strong hands pulled her back to reality. The same comforting smell came grease, sweat and oil. Daryl was knelt in front of her hand on her shoulders still, that empathetic look in his eyes. This time she didn't doubt that's what it was.

Kari didn't wipe the tears away or shove them down again. Instead she crawled into his lap and rested her head on his shoulder and allowed herself to do something she hadn't done in front of someone since she was a child, she cried. She cried for every loss she hadn't acknowledged, for every friend or acquaintance she had lost. For everything of herself that she had let go and lost, for the humanity she was barely clinging to. In that moment she surprised herself but also disgusted herself. How weak, a kind set of eyes and here you are breaking down. Self loathing thoughts aside she still manage to bask in the comfort.

The dim sunlight from the rising sun was just starting to peek through the trees when Kari shifted into wakefulness, Daryls arms still around her, If she had to guess it had only been an hour or two since her weeping episode and instantly an overwhelming feeling of embarrassment took hold. Remembering how easily she had took to him for comfort, how easily she had become frail and weak. Shamefully Kari looked up at him, and after a second he looked down at her. The empathy hadn't left his eyes and his face was still impassive, his hands felt like they were going to slip away from her taking what little warmth they offered.

As embarrassed as she was she felt herself fill with sadness at the thought of him letting go. Instead they tightened and he pulled her closer while his eyes stared down into hers. She leaned up to kiss him on the cheek but found her lips pressed softly against his, her heart racing loudly as he returned the kiss. Her heart was pounding so loudly in her ears she barely heard the walker stumble through the trees beside them. The low shuffle of its inconsistent footsteps and the low groans was all that was needed to pull her back to reality. She was on her feet in an instant, knife out driving it into the walkers skull and putting it down.

A part of her wanted to turn back to Daryl and finish what she started, but staring at the walkers lifeless corpse only served as reminder to her that getting close to anyone was a mistake. She couldn't afford to be weak anymore, she couldn't afford to fall and so she would carry on. Wiping her knife clean on the walkers tattered clothes she resolved herself to pretending what had just happened, didn't and the feelings she had didn't exist either.

"I'm sorry about last night, I didn't mean to keep you up. Actually I meant to let you skip taking watch I know you have a run today and I don't." She had gathered what little she had hurriedly as she spoke her words almost a slur they slipped out so fast. Realizing she had nothing left to put her in bag she looked to him. Kari guessed the smirk on his face was either from her attempted favour which ended in miserable failure or he was finding how flustered she was amusing.

"You ain't got to be so strong all the time, anyone can see ya ain't made of bricks girl stop acting like it." His words hit home, but she had always put up a front with people and now more than ever she needed it. Kari looked down at him still sitting back against the tree in the same spot he had comforted her. She didn't have any words and even if she did she wouldn't have been able to speak with the way her stomach felt when she looked at him now. So she nodded and did her best to suppress whatever feeling was building deep inside.

The walk back wasn't as silent as the walk the previous day, it was full of little things. Reminiscing about how they had learned what, how hard the lessons had been, there were things both obviously left out. Some things were just too personal to share but it was easy to tell that neither one of them had an easy mentor in their Fathers.

By the time they had gotten back the sun had made its full appearance, as they waited for the gate to open she found herself thanking Daryl again. She left out the silent thank you that she wanted to say for his comfort. Kari could've made it last night on her own but she wouldn't have come back with nearly as much and as it was they didn't have much more than nothing.

***If anyone could be so kind as to add reviews, if you like it or hate it either way I'd be interested in your thoughts or suggestions :) **