Chapter 2
Don't eat 2 large bags of sugar, raw, in one go.
Don't address any teacher by their given name.
Don't wear your bikini to potions class in the middle of winter. (Especially if you don't have a bikini, although…)
"Peter get out of my undie draw!"
"Sorry, I was just wondering if I could borrow this hot pink bikini I found in here. I was thinking I could wear it to the Yule Ball."
"NO WAY"
"But it would be a great chick magnet, don't you think?"
"You couldn't get yourself a girl if you were the last guy on earth!" scorned James.
"And your obviously the expert as Lily is all over you."
"Actually she looked at me today."
"You mean when you hit her in the head with a mandarin pip and she gave you the most evil glare I've ever seen, and then jinxed you?" commented Sirius.
"Well, it's a start!" James mumbled.
"Let's just stop arguing about girls and get going with our 101 do's and don'ts of Hogwarts, it's almost tea and we've only got 3 down." Suggested Remus.
"Ok then, if we have to."
Don't let Peter find out you own a pair of hot pink bikinis.
Don't sneak into Dumbledore's office via the secret passageway and steal his prized sherbet, little Robbie Honeydukes was never seen again.
Don't pretend to be under the Imperious curse and jump of a bookcase and break both your legs so you don't have to go to potions class.
"Sirius, hurry up, we're late for tea! We're having CHOCOLATE mousse today!" commented Remus.