Chapter Two

The rest of the tour had been confusingly torturous, much like all of them had been since the conversation with Renzulli. Jamie was beginning to wonder if, perhaps, he should go back to the Sarge and ask him to separate them – not so he could take a shot at making Eddie his girlfriend, but because he now couldn't get these thoughts and doubts out of his head. By talking to him about whether he had feelings, Renzulli had almost made it a self-fulfilling prophecy. Jamie felt like he was equally as useless as a partner to Eddie now as he would have been if they actually did become romantically involved. As much as he would hate to lose her as a partner, maybe they both would be safer in the long run if he did…

On the other hand, the mere thought of going back to Renzulli about this topic was so mortifying that he couldn't bring himself to imagine what he would even say.

Not to mention that Eddie would want to know why he was asking for a transfer, and there was no way he could tell her the truth. More importantly, the idea of not being able to ride with her every day was horrible to think about.

Lost in all these thoughts, Jamie didn't immediately notice that the cause of his dilemma had entered the locker room and was standing at the end of the row. When he did notice her, he jumped back in shock.

"Boundaries, Janko!" Fortunately, this time he had his pants on already, so he wasn't standing there exposed in his boxers. His shirt, however, was still hanging in his locker. Just like the last time she had walked in on him changing, he felt completely naked – but he also felt an odd tingle in his stomach when he saw the quick flit of her eyes up and down his torso. Sure, he had to accept the fact that she didn't have romantic feelings for him, but it helped to know that she didn't find him repulsive to look at…

"Sorry," she said, sounding anything but remorseful. "I just wanted to see if you wanted to grab something to eat, since you'll be deprived of the pleasure of my company on Friday."

"I can go a whole night without your company, you know," Jamie replied sardonically, muffled briefly when he pulled his shirt on.

"Whatever you say, Reagan. Come on, I'll even let you pick the place."

"I would," he slammed his locker and spun the lock. He took an almost involuntary step closer to his partner, torn between wanting to be near her but not wanting to be tempted by being too close. "But I have plans to eat with Erin tonight."

When he had stepped closer, so had she. Now they were almost unnaturally close, but neither one of them made a move to back away. Being in such close proximity was nothing new but something about this time felt…different. Jamie wondered if it just felt that way given the many, many thoughts that had been swirling around his head that day, but whatever the cause, he couldn't stop looking into her eyes. The duration of their eye contact was now bordering on uncomfortable, but neither of them was looking away.

"Oh, I see how it is," Eddie said in an oddly soft voice. "You'd rather spend time with your sister than with me."

Jamie looked up and made an exaggerated hmmm noise as if he were deep in thought, before responding quickly and matter-of-factly. "Yep."

Eddie exhaled loudly, playfully slapping him in the chest with the back of her hand. The contact tingled even after her hand was gone, and Jamie couldn't help but look briefly down at the spot where her hand had been. When he looked back up, it felt even stranger. That same something that crackled between them the night of the kiss was back, and this time there was no alcohol to blame it on.

But Jamie also knew without a doubt that it couldn't have the same result as that night. Forcing himself to take a step back, Jamie effectively destroyed the magic that had been weaving itself around them. He glanced quickly at Eddie's face, but looked away again before she could catch him doing so. That brief glance, though, was enough to see that she looked a little shell-shocked too. A slight flush had risen up her cheeks, but Jamie didn't want to think too long about what any of this meant, afraid that he was only seeing what he wanted to see.

He had to get out of there… And he couldn't help but wonder if "getting out of there" was something that should be more permanent than just tonight.

Jamie walked into the steakhouse and weaved through the tables to join Erin, who was already nursing a cocktail. She raised her glass in greeting.

"Long day?" he teased.

"You know how it is. I already ordered your usual dinner. Hope that's OK; I'm starving."

"No problem," Jamie smiled. "Seeing the long hours you put in on your cases makes it easy to not regret being a lawyer."

Erin chuckled. "So what is it that you do regret?"

Jamie took a sip out of the water glass in front of him. "You mean besides the bigger paycheck?" He hesitated, trying to think of the true answer instead of the glib one. "Probably the mental challenge of it. I only get that sometimes on the job now."

Erin cocked her head. "So why haven't you been trying harder to make detective then?"

Jamie took another sip, not thirsty but stalling for time. Despite the brief taste of detective work he had had thanks to their dad, Jamie really hadn't thought about it much since then. He had told their dad at that time that he still wasn't sure what path he wanted to take. For right now, though, he actually quite enjoyed patrol – but whether that was because of the job itself or the person he patrolled with, he couldn't say for sure. Not knowing what he wanted to do long-term frankly scared him – and he certainly didn't like the teasing that he had to sometimes endure from Danny about not making detective yet. He was a Reagan…shouldn't he already be well on his way to being the next PC? Maybe that was what was expected of him – but then again, not too long ago, being a lawyer was what was expected of him.

But Erin was waiting for an answer so he had to say something, even if he wasn't sure of what the right answer was. "I guess because I think I can still do some good where I am now."

"Speaking of where you are now..." Erin had a glint in her eye that Jamie had learned to fear while growing up. "We never did get a chance to talk about this: why didn't you take Sgt. Renzulli up on his offer? I thought when you left my office the other night that you were thinking about doing so."

Jamie sighed long and loud. Sometimes sisters were more trouble than they were worth. "Can't my private life be private?" he groaned in exasperation.

"Not in this family," Erin said, not sounding the least bit contrite.

Jamie avoided her gaze. The reason was embarrassing to admit, but he knew that she would keep nagging him until he gave it up. "I've already lost a partner in the worst way imaginable. I can't lose another partner just because I feel something for her that she doesn't return."

"How do you know she doesn't return your feelings?"

Fortunately the waiter interrupted them with their meals, and Jamie dug into his steak – taking advantage of a full mouth to avoid answering her question. She was asking too many tonight that he just didn't want to talk about.