The following is the result of Jill's increasing efforts to WRITE MORE, DAGNAMMIT, ANKO! Kishimoto Masashi owns Naruto, and honestly, I don't know if I could do it better—but there are certainly things I would change—but Jill does own her ideas. Which are used in this story.
Thanks to Howard and EeBee-kohai for being such Super Perverts. The Gallant Toad Sage, Jiraiya-sama, would be proud. R.I.P., Jira-chan (Rest wIth Perverts).
There's a bug on my wall. I think it is dead. I don't want to touch it.
Tobi Took Math?
"Deidara, will you touch my e if I square your mc?"
"Me plus you equals fun times in bed, Senpai!"
"What, un!"
"Well, we could have a pillow fight and paint our nails and stuff…"
"Oh… right. Un."
"You know how a square peg can't go in a circular hole, Senpai?"
"Yeah, un…"
"Well, you can stick your square peg in my hole anytime, Senpai!"
"… That doesn't make sense and you're being creepy, un."
"We have to get the angles right for it to go in, Senpai!"
"No, change the angle and it feels better, un. It gives you new sensations."
"Yeah, but you won't clean your teeth properly if you hold your toothbrush that way."
"Don't touch my fishy, un!"
"But it was only one fishy, Senpai."
"No."
"But they're so good. I love the fishies cause they're so delicious!"
"Leave my Goldfish alone, un!"
"My arms itch, un."
"I'll itch your arms, Senpai!"
"Tobi… Go away, un."
"What are the odds that you and I would've ended up on a team together, huh, Senpai?"
"Nine to one against, un…"
"Huh?"
"I found an equation to represent our existence, Senpai!"
"…what, un?"
"Well… Deidara-senpai plus cute little Tobi-chan equals the awesomest team in existence!"
"Go away, un."
"So, Senpai. I have a question."
"What, Tobi, un?"
"Well. How is, 'do you like math' a pickup line?"
"Um… I have no idea. Un."
"Do you like math, Senpai?"
"… That's how, un. It's all in the tone."
"Sasori-danna, your art makes my eyes bleed!"
"I'll clean your bleeding eyes, Senpai!"**
**So, most of the things in this story in general come from random things people around me have said that, when taken out of context, are completely hilarious just because they're ridiculous statements to make. The other day, I was at Krispy Kreme, and the music they were playing…. Was. AWFUL! The expression, "My ears are bleeding" exists purely because of that music. When I told my boyfriend this, his response was, "I'll clean your bleeding ears." O.o
Also, kudos to anyone who notices the Key of Awesome reference. XD Go watch that if you don't know what it is!
Thanks for waiting so long for me to get my act together! Hopefully, this submission will be the first of many of me writing again. =) I've made it a goal for 2011 to submit some form of art (be it writing, photography, or fail drawings) at least once a week. I think it will be good for my brain. =) Feel free to join me! (I stole the idea from shortpinay on dA anyway… Her drawings are awesome!)