*** DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THESE CHARACTERS or DEGRASSI. ***

Jess poured me a glass of water. "Thanks," I said. "So how have you been Jess?"

"I have been alright, considering my mother hasn't been the same." She replied. I couldn't that I was the reason I turned their whole family upside down. " So Eli, if you don't mind me asking, why are you here?" I didn't have an answer, why was I here? I heard someone coming down the steps; I glanced over and saw Julia. "Elijah!" I saw her beautiful long hair and her smile. The image got fuzzy as she disappeared. "Julie," I said in a soft tone. I saw Jess's face turn and her eyes look down. "oh, It is hard I know, My mom is having a heard time with this whole thing." Jess said. "It was a long time ago." I said sternly. "A year isn't long ago Eli. You might still be grieving, you shouldn't rush into a relationship that you are not fully commited to." I turned red with anger. Who is she to tell me that I rushed into a relationship. "Jess, you know nothing at all. I love Julia with every fiber in my body. Don't tell me anything else. Your right, I don't even know why I am here." I got up and walk towards the door. "I thought your girlfriend's name is Clare." I was taken back, did I say Julia? I felt a tear slowly wallow down my cheek. "her room is still the same." Jess told me. I looked at her and she shook her head. She knew I wanted to go to her room. I walked up the stairs and I turned to the third door on the left. I opened the door, I was in her room. I saw pictures of us and I sat on her bed. " Look under the bed." Jess said. "Why?" "Eli, just look!" I saw a shoe box. I pulled it from under the bed. "open it." She demanded. I wiped the tear from my eye. She saved every note that I gave her. Every note, I couldn't believe it. From the time were twelve to about a week before she died. I tried to hold in the tears but I couldn't, I bawled. Jess came over and gave me a hug.

I spent some time in her room just laying in her bed. "Eli, I wasn't expecting you to be in my room." Clear as day, Julia was standing at her doorway, smiling, looking straight at me. "Julie?" I knew I wasn't sleeping because me and Jess just finished having a long conversation. " Well, what are you doing here stranger?"
"Nothing, I just needed someone to talk to." I told her.
"You have Clare now don't you? You could have talked to her." Her big brown eyes sparkled. "She doesn't understand. I just…" she interrupted me. "See, Elijah, that was the one pet peeve I had about you, you are a so secretive. You don't open up to no one. Including Clare, or Me." I didn't want to start yelling because I know if Jess heard me yelling she'd think I was crazy for yelling at myself. "That isn't true." I said to Julia. " Let's not start this argument again Elijah. There is something different about you though." I was a little confused by what she was talking about. "It's Clare." She uttered. "How do you know about Clare?"
" Goodness, Elijah, it is okay to be in love again. I want you to be happy." She smiled and said. " I feel so bad for loving her!"
"Why? She loves you, You obviously love her, when I see you two together, I see just something we never had and that is a good thing. She is good for you Elijah, don't ruin it because you feel guilty."
" You shouldn't be dead!" I raised my voice a little louder. "Why not?" I didn't have a reason for her. " Eli, you didn't kill me, it was a freak accident. It could have been anyone."
"But it wasn't." I said. "Eli, I want you to be happy. Go, leave. Let me be at peace, Your heart isn't with me anymore can't you feel it." She said. "What? I love you Clare." Then she smiled at me and said. " and SHE, loves you too." I came to the realization, I love Clare, I love her, I love everything about her. She is smart and she is pretty, she can be just as stubborn as me maybe even more, She won't take any of my crap, She unconditionally loves me. Julia leaned over to me and gave me a kiss on the cheek and just like that she disappeared. I ran down the steps with the box in my hand and I ran out the door, ran passed Morty. "ELI GOLDSWORTHY! WHAT ABOUT YOUR CREEPY CAR!" Yelled Jess. "Uh, Morty? I be back later to pick him up." I looked up at Julia's window and I saw her smile. Flashback ran through my head of me and Julia at our happier time and then as I ran forward, never looking back I kept thinking about me and Clare.

I approached Clare's door and I was about to knock and the door swung open and Clare came out. She was crying. She wiped her face, her make up smeared a little but she was still beautiful. "Eli? What are you doing here." I was a little out of breath so I couldn't say anything sarcastic because it seems like she always greeted me that way. I had to catch my breath. " I came here to kiss you. What is wrong?" she just looked at me and she didn't say much and I knew what it was, Me with my one minute infatuation and next minute cold shoulder, Her parents fighting, Her not having no one since her sister is away. She didn't have to say anything, I knew what was wrong. You could always see everything in those eyes. "How about we get away for a little while." I told her. Her face lit up and she smiled and then reality hit her, "God, Eli! It isn't that easy." I looked at her and grabbed her hand and said, "well, if you won't kiss me, and won't get away with me for a little bit can you at least walk with me to pick up my car?" I asked. "Where is it?" she asked. "It is a long story." I smiled.