The room was dim

I couldn't keep my eyes open. They would push past the resistance than close again. Brief images of a beautiful, yet unrecognizable, tear strewn and pleading face, came in flashes.

Charlotte! Charlotte! Don't leave me please! I'm so sorry. Please!

I felt like I was on fire in some places, yet others felt amazing, unexplainable warmth made the pain subside.

I tried to fight for the face, the voice, to block out the blackness that I was submerging deeper and deeper into.

BPOV

"Mommy!"

I was gasping as I sat up. My son's voice had wrenched me from the nightmare I was having. I looked around my familiar room trying to get some control, but the dream was so frightening that my breathing wouldn't slow. I put my head between my knees and practiced inhaling and exhaling as slow as I possibly could. Repeating my most recent mantra to myself." It was just a dream."

"Mommy!"

This time the yell was more urgent, so I pulled myself up from my bed and walked across the hall to my sons's room. My two ebony haired boys, were hiding under their covers, trying to trick me. I giggled. I heard their stifled giggles and decided to play along. They got so much playfulness from their father, both of them were dead ringers for Jake as a child. I guess my genes just weren't that strong, maybe if we would have had a girl, but I knew that was no longer an option. I sighed.

"Hmm. I guess the boys have run away. I suppose I'll have to eat the smiley pancakes and bacon all by myself." I said feigning upset.

"Oh mommy! I'm here! I'll help you!" My five year old, Joshua said as he climbed out from the quilted covers of the bottom bunk.

"Me too" said Adrien, my seven year old, peeking just his head out.

"Oh! There you are! What tricky boys I have!" I said wrapping Josh in a hug and rubbing the top of Adrien's head with the other.

I couldn't believe how big they were. They seemed to grow on a daily basis rather than monthly. Josh was starting school next month for heaven sakes. Seemed like I just brought him home from the hospital. It really is astounding how no matter how you try to hold on to the moments with them, it all just seems to fly by.

After having our fill of breakfast, the kids flopped down on the couch to watch cartoons. I went back up to my bedroom to shower and dress. Thank goodness they could watch after each other for a few minutes while I took care of myself once in a while. I glanced my wedding photo siting on top of my dresser. Jake and I were prettyhappy on that day. Smiling and laughing, it was nice to remember when things were easy and carefree before the responsibilities kicked in. We were twenty and had a whole life ahead of us. I got pregnant with Adrien two months after our wedding, which was less than perfect timing, but we managed to make it through. Both of us working to make ends meet. Jake got promoted, shortly before Joshua had come along. He was making decent money so I decided I would stay home with the boys, which worked outwell for all of us.

Jake was at work and wasn't home most evenings until late. He was very committed to his new job. Since we moved to Seattle about six months ago, we haven't seen him much. I secretly didn't mind. As good of a father as Jake is to our boys, our relationship is strained to say the least. He is a good friend and provider though,and that's what I have been taught to value my entire life. My marriage was always less fulfilling than I hoped it would have been, but Jake made me laugh, and was a decent man.

After I dressed, I opened the bedroom blinds. The weather was gorgeous and I couldn't help but smile at the picturesque day that looked back at me. It seemed like a perfect day to take the kids to our new favorite park.