Carlisle laughed heartily. "Werewolf it is. I need to ask you some questions baby. But I want to give you a short time to think about all this. I want you to think about this: What are your fantasies, what do you want over the next week?
I cringed and shut my eyes tightly. My head is spinning. He's asked me to answer these intimate questions because we've just agreed to be intimate together. This feels grueling now that I am alone with him. And where is the love of my life? Leaving me in the arms of another man to figure all this out.
"Bella I'll be back in an hour. Just don't start anything without me," he nibbled my neck like Edward had done not too long ago and left quickly to give me the private time to mull things over.
I fell back into bed and stared at the ceiling. What the hell just happened? What did I just agree to do with my boyfriend's father? Have sex with someone who looks like a sex god but acts like a saint with all of his good deeds. My head began to spin and when I already lost 25 minutes to my cycling thoughts, I thought I better grab a note pad and jot things down before they get lost in the whirlwind. I re-wrote his question and then began to answer it as best I could, with as much honesty as I could muster.
What are your fantasies, what do you want over the next week? I feel like the stereotypical naïve virgin here. I don't have detailed fantasies formulated yet. I want to make out, touch each other, explore each other's bodies, and come together as man and woman. I want the man to take control, be in the lead, and push me past my fears. I have no point of reference when it comes to anything sexual passed kissing. I like the idea of things being a little bit forced with the knowledge there's a safe word in place. I want to know what pleases me and how to please a man so that Edward and I will feel confident in the bedroom. I know Edward probably explained that I'm prudish, but I am very open minded and think my sexual appetite would match his if he'd let go a little bit. I want my first time to be sensual, and truly making love. I am afraid of it hurting a lot the first few times and want it to be bliss, not trauma. Then I want to take it up a few notches and see where it takes us… I want to role play, push the boundaries, and have you take me over the edge. If you're game.
I grinned at my last line. I taped the paper to the outside of the bedroom door. I had 3 minutes before the hour was up and I didn't want to see his face as he read my responses. It was a cowardly way out, but I can't believe I wrote that. I threw myself back in the bed face down, blushing like crazy and trying to listen with all of my might for his return to the bedroom.
I didn't hear his footsteps. I heard the tape being pulled off the door when he arrived, right on time, exactly 60 minutes from his departure earlier. I hid my face and closed my eyes, almost hoping to fall asleep so I didn't have to face the embarrassment. He finally opened the door after what felt like forever, but looking at the clock it was only a minute that he took outside the door. My back was to him but I could feel his gaze upon me without looking in his direction. When my heart was pounding so hard that I was sure he could hear it, the bed dipped letting me know he was climbing in next to me.
He purred in my ear, "Oh baby, I am game for anything you can think of and more. It's only 9 o'clock darling and by midnight I'm going to make love to you and you will lose your V-card. But let's start with a kiss."
Rolling me over, I was wide eyed. I could see him mentally take a step back. He pulled me in his lap and cradled me close. "What's wrong?"
I cried, feeling pathetic. "I'm just confused. I… I don't know why I'm crying. I just… I'm not sure what I want. I have all these thoughts in my head, like I put down on that paper. They make me feel so excited, but then actually doing it, allowing you to take control… Carlisle it scares me more then I let on. And… and even though I trust you, I mean… this is the first time we would cross these lines at all. Two hours ago you were my boyfriend's father, Dr Cullen, husband of Esme with the perfect family. And… and now we're going to make love? What if I mess up, or do something stupid and wrong? What if I… "
"Oh sweetheart. Shh, shh," he kissed my head softly. "I forget how young you are, how confusing all this sex stuff can be. I let your confident façade cloud what Edward told me, about how lost you must feel with all of this. But baby we will work through it, all of it. We'll take it slow but I will push you too, to trust, to grow, to find yourself. I will meet your needs – the needs of the unsure, bashful, little Bella and the confident, explorative, darker side too. We'll figure it out together baby."
Wiping my nose with a kleenex, I giggled. "God you must think I'm just a sad little virgin with doubts. This is going to be painfully slow and awful for you I'm just sur…"
"Don't talk about yourself like that, or say you know what I'm thinking because you don't. I'm thinking what a brave, lovely, sensitive woman I have in front of me. A woman I can't wait to make love to when she's ready." He kissed me softly on the lips holding back the passion I could feel brewing.
"Oh Carlisle. Kiss me, really kiss me," I pulled him close to me, seeing the startled look on his face. I was on a bit of a roller coaster at the moment, I hoped he could deal with the emotional whiplash of it all. But he obliged and kissed me. It started soft and sweet, testing to see where I was mentally before going further. As we kept kissing, I felt him open his mouth slightly and lick my lips gently. He tasted sweet, like vanilla. I lapped at his tongue as it gently came in to my mouth. When he pulled his tongue back, I followed and thrust earnestly into his mouth, tasting him more thoroughly. I moaned into his mouth, and he pulled me close to him to deepen the kiss. Oh I could do this forever. This was kissing, really kissing, like lovers should. We were feeling each other's face, letting soft little moans escape, while always dancing with each other. He was the one that pulled away first.
His eyes twinkled when he looked at me. "You're so sweet baby, you taste divine."
"Not so bad yourself," I grinned.
Carlisle pulled me in his lap again and caressed me softly. He rubbed my back, my shoulders, my arms, my hands, and my fingers. Every thing felt perfect.
"You're so soft baby girl. I want to touch every inch of you," he whispered in my ear, licking it softly causing me to shiver. My stomach clenched in a way I never felt before. My heart began racing, and a light sweat broke out over my skin.
"That excites you," he stated seductively. He ran his fingers over my belly. "I'm going for some skin to skin baby, I'm going to put my hands in your shirt and really feel you." He ran his fingers to the hem of my shirt and gently slid his hands inside, feeling my taut belly, which clenched at that moment again. "Oh, you are anticipating, waiting, hoping for more, just where I want you to be baby girl."
I was panting shallowly. His hands felt so cold against my blazing skin. My head was flitting quickly through a dozen thoughts. I've never been touched this way. I've never done more than kissing, and kissing with Carlisle felt like a whole new level in and of itself. I wish I could see his face, sitting with my back to his chest had some disadvantages. My heart felt like it would explode through my chest. He ran his fingers along my rib cage, causing me to squirm against him.
He chuckled. "Such a responsive little thing. Let's see if your breasts are just as responsive baby." He worked his hand up to my bra and began pushing the cups up and out of the way. I tensed against him. "It's ok baby, this is all about anticipating and feeling the pleasure that is being together. Don't think just feel." His cold hands gently grabbed my breasts and I felt like I startled out of my own skin. His hands felt so big, covering my breasts easily in his palms.
Before I could let a moan escape, I heard his moan. "Oh baby, your breasts are perfect. They're so warm and supple. Feel how your nipples peak at my cold touch?" He lapped at the crook of my neck and I leaned back against him, completely relaxing in his embrace. He grabbed both nipples and rolled them gently between his thumb and index finger. I arched, writhed, and moaned. Oh God.
"She does respond to nipple stimulation, good to know," I could feel him grinning against my neck. I gripped his thighs as I tried to make sense of all the feelings that seemed to have a direct line to my clenching abdomen. "I want your first orgasm to be one that I can feel as it ripples through you baby." He quickly released my nipples, and I immediately ached for his touch. I reached to stimulate myself as he grabbed my wrists. "Oh no baby cakes, your first one is going to come from my touch not yours."
I whimpered to him, "Please…"
He eased me off his lap and laid me on the bed, finally looking me in the face since his intense ministrations on my breasts. His eyes, typically a soft topaz, were darker than I've ever seen. The lust was palpable. I felt so vulnerable now that we were face to face, in such an intimate position.
Carlisle nuzzled me and kissed me from collar bone up the side of my neck, to my cheek, and finally my lips. "Let's get rid of some of these clothes baby, one piece at a time. I'll start with yours." He pulled me quickly to a brief sitting position, before quickly pulling my t-shirt right up and over my head, unclasping my bra, striping it down, and threw it across the room. My back hit the mattress before I could even gasp from the shock of it. "You're in for a mind blowing ride sweet one."
I rolled to my side, trying to hide myself from his intense gaze. I barely look at my own nakedness, I've never been naked in front of any one since I was about 6, much less my boyfriend's father!
I startled as I felt Carlisle cover my back with his chest, which he had shed his shirt. His ice cold skin against mine that was burning was like being doused in ice water. I shut my eyes tightly and shook involuntarily.
"Where've you gone in that pretty little head sweet heart?" he murmured softly in my ear. "I want to see you, now."
"No. What if you don't like what you see?" I bit my lip hard.
He rolled me over without much effort. I fought him as hard as I could, yelling "no, no". He easily took my hands and placed them above my head. "When I tell you now, I mean now Bella. When you don't comply I will do it for you." His eyes narrowed and locked in at my lip. I discovered right as he went to devour my mouth, that my lip was bleeding and Carlisle's more carnal side has made its appearance. He moaned into my mouth and lapped every inch of my lips and inside my mouth. "Oh fuck…" he gasped. His hands moved quickly up my body and palmed my breasts harder than he did before. "You taste so fucking amazing." He kissed quickly down my body, stared down at me, and took my left nipple in his mouth. My head exploded as he licked, nipped, and tugged until I panted with need. Fuck what I look like, if he could play my body this way he could have whatever he wanted.
"I'm feeling we're still quite over dressed Bella baby," he grinned. "How about I let you do the honor's of stripping down my lower half first?"
My brain came to a screeching halt. All this time I didn't even think about *his* needs. I was too lost in the pleasure he was giving *me*. But what about him? Being so patient with a virgin with issues, going so slow when all he probably wanted to do was fuck me now.
"With pleasure," I smirked, as I popped his button and zipped down his jeans. Boxers with a bulge, I liked so far of what I could see of him.