A.N. Yeah yeah, it's been forever, but I've gotten a few shouts that people are still into this one so I felt bad for leaving you hangin' so long…anyways, this is a decent sized chapter so I hope that makes up for it taking me so long. Sorry…I hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think of things. Thanks for sticking with this one! Enjoy…

P

Faith spent the next two days completely out of my sight. I didn't see her once. I had hoped that someone had tipped her off that I wanted nothing to do with her. At least that's what I wanted her to think. I wanted, more than I was willing to actually admit, her to tell me what the hell happened two years ago when she left me in the middle of the night.

She had me distracted during the day and I decided one of those nights to go out and slay to keep my mind off her. I felt horribly guilty that Faith had taken up so much of my thoughts when I had someone like Jennifer in my life. It turned out that Faith had me distracted that night too since I was left barely able to walk after I'd gotten my ass beat by some random demon with mega claws and I actually had to call Jen to pick me up from the cemetery. She pulled her car up outside the gates and I could see how scared she was as soon as she laid eyes on me that night.

"Oh my God, Buffy, are you okay?"

I nodded my head and winced as I tried desperately to stand up on my own. I was the slayer in this relationship and I wasn't going to let her see me like this if I could help it. I realized how dumb that sounded when I was the one that called for her help. She managed to help me up and I somehow convinced her that I just wanted to go home, not to the Council infirmary. She made me promise to let her take care of me and I had to give in, otherwise I'd be on injured reserve for at least two days per Council policy on injuries.

We somehow managed to get back to my apartment without alerting anyone to my injuries. Let's just say that Andrew can be just as easily distracted by shiny things as I can. She laid out towels on the bed and once I was settled on top of them she moved to the bathroom for the first aid kit and came back with a very determined expression on her face.

"Where are you hurt the worst?" she asked placing a gentle hand on my arm.

I'd been through this enough to know that I needed to just fess up if I wanted this to end well. "My leg got sliced up pretty bad."

She nodded and kissed me lightly before moving to my belt buckle and undoing it. She helped me slide my jeans down my legs and that left me in my favorite supergirl underoos. I know I saw a ghost of a smile pass her lips when she caught sight of them, but it was replaced with concern when she saw the angry gash on my thigh.

"Damn, baby. Does it hurt?" she asked me, not looking up.

I still got that flip-flop feeling in my tummy when she called me baby. I hated to compare her to Faith, but the first time Faith called me baby, she had me pinned to the wall in a very hot shower in Switzerland after we'd been snowboarding and she still had little chunks of ice in her hair. Her raspy voice had my girly parts humming and I nearly came with the whisper of that one word.

"It's not that bad."

She looked up and a few errant strands of dark, wavy hair fell over her eyes. She looked more than beautiful to me in that moment and I wanted to cry. She saw it in my eyes and her brow furrowed and she moved up on the bed to capture my lips with hers. "What's that face for?"

I had to lie to her. I had to. "I just got scared when I got my ass handed to me tonight. There was a lot of blood."

She gave me a heartbreakingly sweet smile and her concerned look that just put my stomach in knots all over again. "I think it looks a lot worse than it is. Your healing should have it sealed up in no time and I'm sure after you take a shower you'll feel much better."

I know I pouted, I could see the look that she gets when I pout, but I had to…I was injured. "I'd rather take a bath."

She smiled just a little so only one corner of her mouth turned up and before she could say anything I grabbed the front of her tee shirt and yanked her close to pull her into a deep, searing kiss. Her eyes opened slowly when she pulled back and she gave me a sly smile. "What was that for?"

"Taking care of me," I replied with a smile.

She cupped my chin in one hand and looked at me carefully for a moment. "Want me to run you a bath?"

I nodded happily. "Only if there's room for two."

I kept my eyes trained on her as she got up. She was wearing dark hip hugger jeans and a black tee shirt with tiny sleeves that showed off her toned arms. She was no slayer, but she was in amazing shape and I couldn't help but nearly drool over her. A few minutes later she re-emerged and pulled me up carefully to lead me to a hot bath and a glass of wine. It kinda broke my heart how she took care of me when all I could think of was how I didn't deserve it.

p

The next night there was a knock on my door and glancing at the clock I noticed it was well after midnight. When I opened the door I was surprised to see Faith standing looking weird. Well I wasn't surprised to see her, but I was surprised to see her looking weird. I suppose she looked weird because she looked uncomfortable...which was rare.

"Hey, B," she said quietly.

I stood and took in the sight of her up close. She looked really damn good. "Hey."

She seemed to look over my shoulder into my apartment, almost like she was checking to see if I was there alone. "I know you probably hate me, but I was hoping we could talk."

I wanted to tell her to go to hell, I wanted to tell her to fuck off, I wanted to tell her anything but yes, but all my body seemed to want to do was simply stand aside and let her enter. She looked around taking everything in. I moved to the fridge and grabbed two beers, handing her one and I moved to the terrace to smoke. We sat in silence for a good ten minutes before she got the guts to start talking.

"I guess I should explain," she started quietly.

I wanted nothing more than to be a bitch or a smartass or both, but I held my tongue and waited for her to continue.

"I fell in love with you, B."

I sat and waited for her to say something else…certainly she hadn't kept me waiting for two years to simply tell me that she fell in love with me. I knew that already. She would have to do better than that and I think the look I gave her said it all.

"It scared the hell out of me when I really realized that I loved you and you loved me," she told me, ducking her head and taking a long drink of her beer.

"That's why you left?" I asked angrily. "You really need to do better than that."

"You don't know how scary it is to be loved when you're not used to it. I didn't feel like I deserved to be loved." She looked up. "Especially by you."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I asked her skeptically.

"Do you have any fucking clue how amazing you are?" she asked as she ran a frustrated hand through her hair. "Seriously, B, you've had just about everyone you know in love with you at some point, Xander, Willow, Angel, Spike, even Cordelia had a thing for you at one point. You're special and to be the one that gets loved back…it just got overwhelming."

I sat, completely dumbfounded. I knew about Xander's feelings and Angel's and Spike's, but not Willow and Cordelia's. That was news to me. I shook my head and got back on subject. "Why did it take you almost a year to get overwhelmed?"

She clenched her jaw and lit a cigarette. "At first it was just like a party," she reminded me with a wistful smile. "We got stuff settled here and took off to drink and screw and drink and party and play and that's all we had to do. When we got back and things got a bit more real and serious is when I really started to freak."

I really hated that I could actually rationalize Faith's behavior. "So what are you doing back?"

She dropped her head a moment before sneaking a sideways glance at me. "I want a second chance with you. Or third…whatever."

I narrowed my eyes and tilted my head. "How do I know you won't leave again?"

"Can you trust me?" she asked looking at me fully.

Yeah right. "No."

She gave me a nod and shrugged. "Well, then I'll have to do whatever I can to get you to trust me again."

I couldn't take much more of this. "It's been two years. How do you know I haven't met someone?"

She stopped for a second and looked down at her beer. "Have you?"

I smiled. I was going to enjoy this part. "Actually, I have."

She actually looked a little crushed at that. She nodded her head and took a drag of her cigarette. "Do you love him?"

I was going to enjoy this even more. "Her name is Jennifer."

Her head snapped up and her eyes narrowed, thinking I was messing with her. Then she realized that I wasn't. "Wait, hold up, you're dating another chick?"

I gave her an expectant look. "Why is that so hard to believe?"

Her mouth opened and shut before it opened again. "I thought…I dunno, I just…"

I really was enjoying this a bit too much. "What? You thought you were the only one and would always be the only one? At one point I thought that too, but you left me, Faith! I waited for you for two years. When you didn't come back I decided to move on with my life."

She sat silently, snubbing out her cigarette and standing up. She moved to stand in front of me and she looked me in the eye. "Do you love her?"

I couldn't hold her stare and I looked down. "I don't know yet." I had to move from that spot, I could feel the slayer connection pounding through my system and the feel of her so close to me was making my head spin. She was too close and she smelled so good. I moved to the railing of the balcony and leaned against it, taking a deep breath of fresh air to clear my head.

"Look, B, the truth is I'm not going anywhere. I don't care if you're with someone else or not. I'm gonna stick around until you can trust me again and until you're single again and then I'll win you back. You wait and see."

I turned to see her give me a sad smile before she turned and walked out of my apartment. It only took a moment for me to collapse into a nearby chair and cry. I must have been crying pretty good because I didn't even hear Jennifer come in.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

My head snapped up, panic rising in my chest. I didn't mean for her to catch me crying. She couldn't know about Faith. I wiped my tears away and shook my head. "One of the girls got hurt pretty bad tonight and we weren't sure she was going to make it."

Her sympathetic face was on immediately and she moved in to hold me. I couldn't take it at that moment. I was way too confused. I felt completely overwhelmed and claustrophobic when her arms encircled me and all I could do was shake my head and stand up. I couldn't even look at her as I stood with my back to her as I lit a cigarette. I knew I was being unfair and all the shit with Faith was what was really pushing me further from Jen, I just didn't know what else to do.

"Buff? Are you okay?"

I could hear it in her voice, she knew it was more than what I told her and I was making myself sick lying to her about this. She couldn't know the truth. She would hate me. I turned and looked at her. Her eyes were begging me to let her in. I had to give her something. "Sometimes it just hits me how close I can be on any given night to dying."

With that, her entire body language changed. Her shoulders relaxed and her hands unclamped and she gave me an understanding smile. She moved so she was standing in front of me and I was completely captivated by her. "Aww, baby." She pulled me into a hug and held me for a few minutes.

My stomach was in knots again because of the lies I was telling. I was lying to her, Faith and myself and I hated myself because of it.

She pulled back after a few minutes and gave me a wicked smile. "Ya know, if you want I can take your mind off things for a while."

I smiled and kissed her, holding my hand out to her and letting her lead me to bed.

p

Faith has always had this way to make people…well, obsess is probably the right word for it. She's always had people obsessing about her. Will and Xander obsessed about her when Faith first came around…well so did I but can you really blame me? Anyways, in the few days since she'd been back I couldn't stop thinking about her. Every little thing she did when I was around her was burned into my brain. She moped around the campus avoiding just about everyone but me and Xander. It was weird. I noticed that she just happened to be in the gym when I was there for my classes and she disappeared when Kennedy taught hers. Before Faith left, she and Kennedy had been great friends.

Anyways, she was moping around one day in particular with her jeans half hanging off her ass and her tee shirt was worn and faded. She had flip flops on and I watched from my office as she stood in the gym after all the girls left and stood shooting baskets by herself. Every time she took a shot her shirt rode up to expose her belly and I found myself captivated by her. I could hear her keeping a running commentary with herself about the basketball she was playing and I hated to admit that it was really quite cute. Ya know, she drinks juice boxes…Faith, the big, bad slayer…she likes the orange ones. She makes me crazy with all her stupid, cute crap. I made a point when we were together to learn every little thing that made her who she was. It's hard knowing how much effort I put into our relationship only to have her throw it back in my face when she left me, but even after all that I wouldn't take a minute of it back. Dammit…

p

She had only been back three days and was going through a lot in being back, but as her best friend I had to talk to her now that she was back. I found her in one of the training rooms knocking the shit out of one of the hanging bags in the back of the room. She must have sensed a shift in the air because she stopped instantly and looked around. Once she spotted me I could see it in her eyes that she was expecting me to either kick her ass or giver her shit. Of course, I had no intentions of doing either. Once I was close enough to her I pulled her into a hug…I really needed her to know I was on her side.

"Hey, Kid."

I gave her a squeeze and released her giving her a punch on the arm. "Where the hell have you been? You barely call, you don't write. What's a girl to think?"

She smiled a second before she rolled her eyes. "Apparently a girl thinks she should move on."

About that. "Yeah. Dude, in her defense, she waited like over a year for you to come back before she'd even go out."

Faith shook her head and sighed. "Wanna go out and drink?"

I gave her a sideways look. "So there's going to be more talk about all this, right?"

"As long as you're buying, kiddo," she called out as she headed out the door. I followed along behind her and she waited as I locked up the training room. I left her at her place and headed to mine and Willow's to shower. She was on the phone when I came in and I planted a gentle kiss on her lips before heading to the shower. A few minutes later Will entered the bathroom and sat up on the counter while I showered.

"Did you find Faith?" she asked over the dull roar of the shower.

"Yup. We're going out for a few drinks."

"How is she? I haven't seen much of her or Buffy so I'm kind of out of the loop on Faith's sanity since she's been back."

I lathered my hair with shampoo. "She seemed okay. She's obviously seen Buffy. Or at least she knows about Jennifer."

"Even more of a reason to keep an eye on her sanity meter."

I smiled. That's my girl, always thinking about the big picture. "She seemed more sad than pissed, so I guess that's a good thing, right?"

"I guess we'll see."

I peeked my head out from the shower door and smiled when Willow kissed me. "I'll be sure to get the whole story tonight."

She smiled and nodded. "I'm gonna go over to Buffy's to watch a movie with her and Dawn. Call me later?"

I nodded and leaned closer for another kiss. "Love you."

She smiled that perfect Willow smile. "Love you too."

I watched her leave and thought to myself how lucky I was to have her in my life. I finished my shower and got dressed. Faith arrived as I was drying my hair and she wandered around looking at pictures we had up all over the apartment of the gang working and playing. She picked up a framed picture of Buffy, Will and Xander and ran a gentle finger over Buffy's face, setting it down gently and biting her lip. She looked up and gave me a sad smile. "You about ready?"

I nodded and grabbed a jacket. "Let's go."

We walked to a bar nearby and grabbed a booth in the back. It was one of my favorite places to go to drink mostly because it was quiet enough to talk and it was dark and kind of a hole in the wall that kept most of the college kids from coming in. It had more of a local feel to it and it was a good place for us to sit and drink and talk. We each ordered a beer and I just sat and waited.

"I really didn't mean to be gone for two years," she started, running her fingers over some of the names carved in the table. "I went to Angel and worked with him. I needed to know that I could fight the good fight on my own."

I sat and listened, stealing a cigarette from the pack she rested on the table. When in Rome? I dunno, Will would probably chew me out later, but this was a stressful situation and I needed something to relax me a bit.

"That excuse may work for Giles and even Willow, but not me. Frankly I'm sort of insulted that you even tried it."

She glanced up sharply and looked at me carefully for a second. "Me and B spent months together doing nothing but drinking and partying and screwing and it was easy because that's all I thought of it as."

Ah, something was starting to click. "So when the party ended and you sobered up, you had to face the feelings."

"That was some scary shit. When we first got back, I tried to keep it a party cause I was freakin' out about the way I felt about her…she wanted to get back to work and back to reality. I couldn't handle that shit."

"Do you still love her?"

She just shook her head and laughed bitterly. "B's the kind of girl that once you love her, there is no not loving her. It's kind of a permanent thing. Just ask Angel."

"Pass," I mumbled. "So what the hell are you gonna do?"

She shrugged. "I talked to Giles and he's gonna give me a job and let me have my old place back. I'm back to stay this time."

"Are you sure?"

"Look, Ken, I had to know I could do this fighting thing when the world wasn't at stake and I didn't have B and Giles holding my hand. I had to do it alone."

"Then why go to Angel?" I ask angrily.

"He believed in me when nobody else did. I knew he'd give me freedom like I needed but still let me bend his ear when I needed that too. I can't explain it. I just needed to be with him."

"Buffy was crushed when you left." I hated to go there on Faith but she really needed to understand that she couldn't just think about herself anymore…especially if she was back for good. "I don't care what you say, but if you're really back for good, you need to start thinking about the whole team, not just yourself. We rely on each other here and we have to be able to trust that we can count on each other. Can I count on you?"

She met my eyes with a long, hard look and finally nodded her head. "I'm back for good. Whether or not B ever takes me back."

"Good." I knew that was all that ever needed to be said about that stuff.

It didn't take long. "So tell me about her."

I held up a finger and moved to the bar to get us each a new beer and two shots. I knew it was gonna be a long night and Faith needed to be really drunk to get through it.

Once I was seated we took our shots and I couldn't stall any longer. "They met at a club. Buffy was hammered and they danced. They dated and ya know, whatever."

"What's she like?" I knew it must have killed her to even ask.

"She's like an emotionally available, non-slayer version of you. She even fucking looks like you. Shocked the hell outta me when she first came around to meet us."

I watched as Faith ran this over in her head…I would have paid to hear her thoughts in those moments. But that's more Willow's thing not mine. It didn't take me long to really regret taking Faith to a bar to talk about her ex and her ex's new girlfriend, but I think she needed it.

"So the gang didn't have a problem with her dating another chick?" she asked.

"Faith, we were all there when she dated you…how is that different?"

She shrugged. "Yeah, but me and B were different. I think everyone saw that one coming." She gave me an expectant look. "Didn't you?"

I shrugged. "We all just figured at first that she had some kind of secret lovah or something," I joked with a grin.

A few hours later, she was totally tanked and I had to drag her drunk ass out of the bar and back to the Council. Unfortunately we couldn't have timed our entrance any worse and it just so happened that Jennifer was waiting for the elevator. I panicked and tried desperately to get Faith to look at anything but the other girl, but Faith had killer instincts and knew just by looking at her who she was.

"That's her, isn't it?" She looked from me to Buffy's girlfriend and back to me. I couldn't lie…Faith could read me like a book. She let me go and made her way over to the girl.

"Hey! Are you Buffy's new girl toy?" she slurred as she made her way across the lobby.

Jennifer looked up and shot a panicked look at me before setting eyes on Faith. She knew Faith was a slayer too and you could see fear in her eyes as Faith approached her.

"Are you? Are you my replacement?"

Jennifer backed up a step and I managed to get close enough to Faith to hold her still. The alcohol made it tough for her to do two things at once, so she stopped moving to speak. "You see the resemblance, don't you? I bet you haven't seen a picture of me because she was scared you'd see it too."

"You must be Faith," Jennifer mumbled. "You left her in the middle of the night and took off for two years, right? You snuck out like a coward and you wonder why she moved on?"

Faith made a move towards her and I managed to hold her back as the elevator dinged. "You go ahead, we'll take the next one."

Jennifer opened her mouth to get another shot off on Faith, but held her tongue and stepped onto the elevator, giving me a worried smile.

"She'll never love you like she loved me!" Faith called out before the doors shut completely.

Once the doors closed I smacked her on the arm. "Will you chill? The best way to get Buffy back isn't to go after her girlfriend. She's gonna be pissed."

Faith suddenly pouted and slumped over a bit. "I don't want her to hate me."

I had to smile a bit at the cuteness of the pout. "Faith, she won't hate you. She'll just be pissed."

She pouted deeper and slouched her shoulders. "I'm tired of her being pissed at me. What am I gonna do?"

I asked myself the same question thinking about the coming weeks as we waited for the next elevator. As we stepped on, Faith mumbled about being drunk and being an asshole. It was really sad actually and I hated that she felt that way.

P

A.N. Well? What did ya think? I hope you enjoyed. Thanks again for reading and again I'm sorry it took so long to get the next part up. Please review!! Thanks!