Listen To Your Heart ch. 2
Not much has changed since the last time I was in Lima almost as if this place is stuck in time over the last time and I am so glad that I didn't get trapped here but there are fond memories here. My Fathers are still here and I try to visit them as much as I possibly can given my hectic schedule of being Broadway star as well as a wife and mother keeps me rather busy. They told me while I was pregnant that children often bring out the best and worst of their parents but the good outweighs the bad every time with knowing smiles on their faces. I see what they mean when it feels like the boys make me want to pull my hair with their antics or when they offer to help me with something as I know that children aren't always going to be prefect little angels. I love my boys more than life itself as I want to give them all the love that I have in my heart and I also love the fact that my Fathers have the same kind of relationship with Dean and Carter that I had growing up.
I just wish that the twins have a more loving relationship with their own father and I know that he's been trying to be a better father to them but it just seems rather forced and it appears that Brody would rather be anywhere else. Finding out about his subsequent drug problem and spending abundant in strip clubs saddens me but also makes angry that he would rather time with strangers and exotic dancer than with his wife and children. I don't want to punish my husband for the decisions that he chose as he wants to make an effort to do the right thing by going to rehab and I know that I can't let my family find out. If my fathers find out, it will be one more thing that they'll have to convince me that I shouldn't be with Brody and if the guys find out, they'll seek out as it will lead to them wanting me to leave him. I know that the guys love me and the twin as they will do anything to protect us but the last thing that I want is for the boys to grow up without a father and I still very much care about my husband.
I know that he's not winning Husband of the Year award but I know that the man that I fell in love with is still in there somewhere and I will do everything in my power to make this work. As we work out of the terminal to see my Father waiting for us as the boys take off towards their grandparents who lavish them in hugs and kisses before I find myself in a familiar pair of arms, lifting me off of the ground. Daddy kisses the top of my head before passing me over to Dad who hugs me equally as tight before kissing my forehead then looks at my husband through narrowed eyes causing me to sigh. I know very well that neither of my Dads are very fond of my choice in life partners as my track records with past sufficient others have ended in myself coming home crying with a broken heart although there was certain blonde exception. No, just no. I haven't heard a single word from her in the last ten years and I haven't thought about her in the slightest as I am not about to start now.
Daddy takes my and the boys' luggage, placing them in the trunk of the Dodge truck as the rest of us climb into the back while Dad was having a rather animated conversation with the twins. Looking out of the window, watching the house and trees roll by reminds me of all the times that I would leisurely walk or go out for a quick morning jog through the neighborhood before school. Nothing has really changed in the years that I moved to New York and I'm glad that I left but I couldn't help feeling sad that it wasn't in the way that I imagined it to be as I couldn't really enjoy the city that I loved because of my broken heart. I'm pulled out of my thoughts by something taking a hold of my hand to see Brody looking at me with concern and confusion in his eyes but I quickly waved him with a smile and a kiss on the cheek as Daddy parked in the driveway.
Dean and Carter quickly get out of the car towards the backyard where the swing set was instilled after their third birthday party while Brody gathers our luggage then follows me inside the house. I walked into my childhood bedroom and I see that my Dads didn't change a thing since the last time that we came to visit but I stopped help feeling a little embarrassed that my husband seeing what my room look like although it doesn't stop him from teasing me about it. I sit down on the edge of my bed before flopping down while Brody sets the luggage down then sits down next, leaning against the palm of his hands as a silence falls between us and I hate it because it didn't used to be like this. I would give anything to be able to talk to the man that I considered one of my best friends but the man that's sitting next to me practically feels like a stranger that I know nothing about as he turns to look at me.
Brody feels that he hurt me deeply and had broken the trust between as there's no telling what he's been hiding from me aside from the drug use and going out to the strip clubs. I wish that he had told me sooner about his happiness and I understand that it can rather hard to find good roles or go out on countless auditions and not heard any back but I am his wife, I would have been there for him. The trying Broadway star lays on his side, facing me as I turned to lay on my side as well, cupping his cheek while running my thumb gently across it causing him to breathe in sharply before placing his hand over my own to kiss it. Brody looks me in the eyes and I could see how conflicted as well as the uneasiness of what is going to happen for us, leaning in to pressing a lingering kiss on his forehead before pulling back only for him to follow me.
Before I knew it my husband was on top of me, pressing open-mouthed kisses along my neck while his hands were roaming underneath my shirt as it's not like I don't want to be intimate with him but it still feels like emotions are just high. I place my hand on his shoulders, gently pushing Brody back as I shake my head at me causing him to deflate quickly, resting his head on my shoulder while holding me tightly to his body if he lets up even an inch that I will disappear. I don't know that what's going on in his head and I wish that I could because I want to make things easier on him as I run my hand along his neck in a soothing matter, singing softly. It wasn't long before my husband's breathing evens out, signaling that he had fallen asleep before carefully removing myself from underneath him as I change into something more comfortable. I walked down stairs towards the backward to see the boys climbing the old oak tree happily when Daddy walks outside, standing next to me with his arm wrapped around my shoulder.
"It's been a long time, baby girl" Daddy said kissing the top of my head.
"I know Daddy but Broadway and the boys have been keeping me on my toes"
"I know, I know. My baby girl has really grown up to be one fine women and I couldn't be prouder than I am right now" Daddy beams with pride. "Even if her taste in sufficient others is rather questionable"
"Please Daddy, don't go there" I sigh at the thinly veiled barb at Brody. "I know that you and Dad aren't very fond of my husband but you have to let go of this apparent disdain that the both of you have for him"
"I'm sorry baby girl but I can't help feeling like you can do so much better than him but you're right"
"Thank you, I'm not asking you to love him or even to like him but at least be civil towards. Can you do that for me? Please?" I pouted.
"It might be like pulling teeth but I can definitely try my best" Daddy said smiling.
"That's all that I ask of you"
Dean and Carter run towards me in dirt covered clothes and I couldn't help scrunching up my nose in slight disgust as I hated when they got dirty but Daddy always told me that boys will find a way to get covered in dirt. Maybe so but that doesn't mean that I have to like it. Daddy offered to get the twins cleaned up when someone knocks on the door and I moved to open it to find someone rather unexpected standing awkwardly on my step, my ex boyfriend Finn Hudson. I considered the former quarterback to be one first love but we were never right for each other as we were happy for one moment to the next arguing and fighting before breaking up then ending getting back together. I did value his opinion in high school and it was obvious that we were better off as friends as we parted on a good note as he decided to stay in Lima to help Burt with his tire shop while trading the occasional email here and there.
I know that he wants to go into the army to change his dad's dishonorable discharge into an honorable one but I'm afraid if he goes into the army that he might come back but I never want to be the reason that Finn doesn't pursue this if it's something that he wants to do. I heard from Kurt that the former jock had taken over for Mr. Schuester as the glee director and teaching a new bunch of show choir kids and it seems like he's really enjoying the teaching position. Finn smiles that dopey smile that used to make me melt as he pulls me into his arm, spinning me in the air as I squeal in surprise but hugging my old friend as he finally set me down on the ground.
"It's been a long time, Rachel. You look great" Finn smiles brightly.
"Thank you and you look like you're doing rather well. I like the new haircut" I said smiling back.
"Thanks, I thought that it was time for change, ya know" Finn laughs bashfully.
"I do and not to sound rude but what are you doing here, Finn?" I asked curious.
"Kurt came for the class reunion so I was going to ask your Dads if they knew whether you was gonna come down or not" Finn said smiling. "I'm glad that you did because I missed you and I didn't get to see much of you during your last visit"
"I know and I'm sorry about that. Things certainly change when you have children"
"Yeah, about that. As you know that me and my girlfriend Annie have been together for almost four years now, right?" Finn asked nervously.
"Yes, you two make such a cute couple but where are you going with this, Finn?" I asked raising an eyebrow.
"Annie's pregnant" Finn said blushing.
"Oh my god Finn, that's amazing" I said hugging him. "Congratulations! Where is Annie's due date"
"October twenty-fourth and the thing is… I was kinda sorta hoping that you would have the honor of being our kid's godmother" Finn said sheepishly.
"Seriously? You want to be the godmother? Are you sure? What does Annie think about that?"
"It was actually her idea and you know that she's really fond of you. I couldn't think of a better person for the job so do you…"
"Of course, I would be honored" I said grinning from ear to ear.
"Great, I kinda get going but I'll see you at the reunion tomorrow" Finn said waving goodbye.
Becoming a godparent was the last thing that I expected to happen on this trip but I have a feeling that something more unexpected is going to happen tomorrow night although I can't tell if it's good or bad.
Taking a one year old on a plane may not have been the best idea but Ryan would've gotten fussing regardless if on a plane in the air or trapped in a car for a few hours but at least with aircraft, we landed in Lima in perfect time. I grabbed my duffel bag, slinging over my shoulder and the diaper bag while holding a small infant before moving to the pick-up curb to hail cub back to the Lopez' residence as I didn't tell Papi when our plane lands. The last thing that I want to is pull him away from the hospital and I know that I'm gonna get a lecture from Mami for not saying and that I should start relyin on them more because they're my family as that's what family is for. I know that they wouldn't mind picking me up from the airport or doing things for me in general but I guess I'm so set in my ways about doing everything on my own as it's still do today as the cab pulls up in front of me.
I open the cab door, allowing Dani to get in first before giving the cabbie the address as he pulls off towards our destination while Ryan cuddles into my shoulder, sucking on her thumb. I looked out the window to take in the scenery and it doesn't surprise that Lima looks exactly how I left all those years as I can honestly say that I don't miss it at all but there are definitely some fond memories as well as some painful ones. Mami and Papi say that I could come down to visit more as they hardly see and they miss seeing my face while Santana has given me shit for staying in California for long periods of time but I know that it's her way of saying that she misses me too. It wasn't too long after graduation that Brittany into the apartment when she graduated McKinley a year after us to go to school for dance and if the two couldn't keep their hands off each other before then we stayed living together, it got ten times worse.
I walked in on these two in compromising positions just one too many times so I had them keep them the bumping uglies to their room and it was occasionally that I would caught in the kitchen or the living room. After I started building my DJ career and got enough money to move out of the apartment because it felt I was the odd man out when San and Britt would get overly affectionate with each other. It made miss Rachel and I know I didn't want to forget the memories of us being together but thinking about said memories hurt too much to think about as I knew that it was my fault but it was for the best. Of course I kept tabs on the rising Broadway starlet and I knew that she would be a start as I would look her up on the internet or read about her in the tabloids but it was like a double-edge sword since she was always with her boyfriend now husband.
I can't help feeling like the guy is shady and seems like he's too good to be true but he has more in common with Rachel then I ever did and she's happy from what I can tell and that's all that I ever wanted for her. Things don't always work out the way that you plan and I never expected to be back in Lima for a class reunion or have a children with someone that I wasn't in love with but what can you do as the cab pulls up in front as I handed a few bills. Mami and Papi have Dani a few times but the head of nurses wasn't all that impressed with the rock star and wasn't that happy with me when she found out that I gotten my girlfriend pregnant without the intent of getting married in the near future. I know that the reason that Mami never liked my girlfriend because she still favor me being with Rachel but there's no way that's happening especially since she's happily married with children and I'm not in a position to hop into another relationship at the moment. I walked up to the front door to what most people would consider a mansion, unlocking the door with the key that Mami and Papi had given to me when I moved in all those years ago.
I'm instantly hit with the smell of Pozole, making my mouth water as I headed towards the kitchen to find the head of nurses standing over the stove with her back facing me. The idea of sneaking up behind her popped into my head and I carefully come up behind up before I could follow through with my plan, she quickly turns around to stick a wooden spoon in my mouth with a smirk on her lips.
"Nice try Q but you have to get up rather early to sneak up on me" Mami said wagging her finger at me before pulling me into a tight hug. "But it's great to see you, mija. I missed you"
"I missed you, Mami" I said hugging her back.
Mami pulls back slightly to kiss my forehead before Ryan made her presence known by getting fussy casing Mami to start cooing at her then takes the infant from me when Papi walks down the stairs. The suregeon's eyes rubs the sleep out of his eyes as they instantly find as he smiles warmly before taking me into his arms as I didn't get to experience receiving a lot of physical affection from Russell and Judy, the occasional pat on the head or back. When I started living with the Lopez', it was something I had to get used to as they didn't need to be prompted to show me affection for any kind of reason other than because they feel like it as they made feel like I was a part of the family. They didn't treat me any different than they would treat Santana regardless of who I choose to be in a relationship with or what was between my legs as I struggled for a long time to feel like I was at home in my own body. Papi takes my face in his hands, looking for something to be out of the norm as I roll my eyes at his ridiculousness when I saw the mischievous glint in his eye when he notices Dani in the room, nodding in her direction before hitting me upside of my head.
"Ow! What was that for?" I asked rubbing my head.
"That was for not telling us that you were coming today so we couldn't come get you" Papi said frowning slightly. "What did I tell you telling us when you're coming?"
"To call you as soon as I land" I muttered.
"Exactly and the next time that you don't call us, I will throw my chancla at you" Mami lightly threatens.
I involuntary flinch at the threat because I know that she's not kidding because I saw her do it plenty of times to Santana in high school and I knew that I don't want that to happen as I nodded quickly in agreement. Mami giggles somewhat before ushering me and Dani, saying that dinner will be done soon as I lead my girlfriend towards my old room as I set my stuff at the foot of the bed as she looks around the room. When I moved out of my old room, I had only thirty minutes to get as much of my stuff out before the timer on the oven ran out but luckily I came back two weeks to collect the rest of my stuff when Russell was out and Judy was too hungover to notice anything. I was allowed to redecorate the room to that of my choosing and Santana even found me a decent sized bookcase to store all of my books along with a few of my sketchbooks that I haven't touch in a long time. The rock star stops in front of my framed pictures, picking it up and studying it for a moment then shows it to me with a smile on her face and I see that it was a picture of me hugging Rachel from behind, kissing her on the cheek while she was smiling at the camera with a mega watt smile on he face. Looking at that photo hurt a little because I remember that it was from the state country fair that came to town every year as I gently take it from Dani.
"You weren't kidding when you said that you two dated and you look really happy in that photo too"
"I was happy but that was a long time ago" I sigh, setting the photo down.
"Quinn-"
"Dani, don't start okay. We dated and broke up, end of story so drop it" I said glaring at her.
"I get that this sensitive subject for you and I know that you still care about your ex but don't pretend that it doesn't mean anything to you because it does. I can see it on your face or when you think that no one is looking and I think that you should talk to Rachel to get some closure or move forward somehow" Dani said unfazed by my glare.
"Rachel is married Dani, happily married and if there was some way that around that, there's no way that she would want to get back together to someone like me. I'm not the person that I was in high school"
"That's right, you're not and that's a good thing but I'm not saying go out to profess your love for the woman. You know if she's truly happily married or not since you should know that you can't believe everything you read in magazines" Dani said smirking slightly.
"Heh right but I don't even know if she's coming to this school reunion, much less what I would say to her if I ever saw her again" I said running my hand through my short hair.
"Oh I don't know, maybe along the lines of 'Hi' or 'Hello' and where the conversation goes" Dani said sarcastically.
"Whatever, bitch but you try to talk one of your exes that you still have feelings for and tell me how that goes" I said lightly pushing her.
"I will" Dani giggles but her expression turns serious. "But Quinn, seriously. You have to talk to Rachel regardless of what happens as it could be therapeutic for you and I'm sure that she would want to know the real reason behind why you split up"
"I don't know" I biting my lips.
"Come what may, I got your back and I'll be there every step of the way if you want me to be" Dani said hugging me.
"Thanks Dani" I said returning the hug. "You're the best fake girlfriend that a girl could ask for"
"No problem but you will miss this sweet ass when we eventually break" Dani said wiggling her eyebrows.
"Whatever you, freaking pervert" I said pushing her away, rolling my eyes playfully.
I don't know what may happen tomorrow but it's happening whether I want it to or not so I might as well be prepared for it.
A/N: I want to let everyone know that I have a poll about whether I should do a sequel to The Nerd & The Cheerio or not
~Nicole The Dragon Rider signing off
End of ch. 2