Chapter Two
Madness

S&H Grocery is only five blocks away, they had fresh pineapple and he chose the freshest and tried to triple-time walk back, his head still reeling. Chelle and Sammy in each other's bodies - he's still not sure he hasn't fallen asleep in the elevator and is riding up and down with Chelle worried sick. In some ways he'd prefer that but he doesn't meet his slumbering body in the car going up; hadn't on the way down and this is no improvement.

He lets himself in and the first thing he sees is Chelle, rather her body, hurrying across the room to him.

"Honey!"

He shies back - how strange is that? - but there's nowhere to retreat to but the door and he can't avoid her tight hug.

"Sam- Chelle?"

She leans back with a grin, looking up to him. "It's okay. It's me."

"Huh? How?" He holds up the bag, not easy with her arms still pinning his. "I brought the pineapple."

"Don't need it."

x

This planet's spinning too fast, he decides as she grins again, probably - certainly - knowing by how much he isn't following this. "It's okay. The spell wore off, rather suddenly actually. I was in the bathroom, then suddenly out here and Sammy came out, as freaked as a muggle who just found herself peeing in a Hogwarts bathroom."

"I guess so." He looks around. The Book of Shadows is gone, likely back where it belongs - just like Chelle. "Where is she?"

"Gone. She warped out of here like the Legions of Hell were after her. I don't know that we'll see her any time soon."

"I guess not." With all this talk about freaking, he imagines she must be the most. He rather feels sorry for her, even if it was her novice goof-up that caused it all.

x

Chelle pulls him down into a kiss, and it's so fiery all he can do is go along with the passion. One hand to the back of his head holds his lips down to her, the other invades his rear pocket to hold something else.

"Chelle?" he barely manages to slur against her lips.

"Jimmy, don't talk," she mutters into his mouth. "Just do it. I've just had a harrowing experience, you have no idea what it's like to be in someone's body -" she hesitates. "I mean that way. I want you to do it now. Nail me into this body."

He doesn't need any more urging.

x

They can barely walk down the short hall, kissing passionately.

"Take me - do it hard, rough!" she cries, pulling him.

"I'll hurt you," he reminds her.

"No you won't," she says, kissing and caressing feverishly. "I want to be sure where I am. I want to feel every inch of you in me. Hard, fast, make me feel you," she gasps, lust ripping her breath her questing hands search and he stops hesitating.

"Don't hold back - I want to feel you! Take me, you giant! Take your bitch!"

The closet door bursts open and slams against the bedroom door as Sammy Sky falls out, slams to the floor.

Shocked, Jimmy stares at the petite blonde, her hands tied before her, knees and ankles tightly bound and a rolled handkerchief pulled down to her neck. Chelle is still holding him but all his world focuses on the fury of the woman laying on the floor who half sits up, eyes wide in searing rage.

"What the Hell are you two doing with my body?"

x

"Should be obvious," Chelle – Sammy? – tells her as he rushes backward to the edge of the bed. The woman beside him sighs hard. "It was great too, until 'witchus interrupt us'."

"Chelle?" he says, looking from one to the other, one frustrated, the other tied and furious on the floor, no longer sure which one to address.

"When I get untied I'm gonna kill you!" Sammy's mouth cries, her face showing such red fury as the petite blonde was never capable.

"Not while I'm in here," Michelle on the bed counters with a smirk and he pulls back further, nearly falling off the mattress.

This only drives Michelle - Sammy - whoever's on the floor into deeper frustrated rage and she rips at the ropes, unable to loosen them.

"Jimmy, untie me!"

"I wouldn't if I were you," Michelle advises; or rather her lips do.

"GOD DAMN IT, Jimmy," the small blonde woman cries, pulling helplessly at the ropes, "you untie me this instant or I'll turn you into an aardvark!"

"She needs her hands free for that," 'Michelle' points out.

"Will you keep out of this?" he demands. "It's your fault we're in this mess. God, I'd spank you if I didn't think you'd enjoy it."

"No matter which of us you do that with, you're guaranteed an orgy."

He leans forward, nails her in place with his finger hard to Michelle's chest. "Just stop." She shifts to her left and he yanks his finger back from her breast like it'd been burned.

"Don't you like it?" she asks with a devilish grin.

"JIMMY!"

He backs completely off the bed, sure this is the worst nightmare of his life - or the end of it.

x

"You should've seen him," Michelle tells Sammy - or rather Sammy – "He was like a wild man."

"Jimmy!" Sammy's body yanks his attention to the floor. "Untie me!"

"What are you going to do?" He's afraid of her power - and her temper.

"She can't do anything," Michelle - Sammy counters. "She has no power, we both know that," she finishes, looking victoriously at the bound woman. "It's in here."

"But you don't know how to use it."

"I learn fast."

"Then I'll rip you apart with my bare hands!"

"Be my guest. It's your body."

"I know what hurts."

"Your hubby's cannon."

The blue eyes lock on him and he feels his doom. "JIMMY!"

"I didn't do anything! I didn't know it was you. Wasn't you."

"Get these God damned ropes off me!"

x

He moves to free his wife - not his wife? His wife.

"Bad idea," the other advises, getting off the bed.

"You shut up," he commands, unable to endure much more of this, but he'll be damned if he suffers for any of it.

He unties Sammy's - Michelle's – ankles, legs and hands, boosts her to her feet but as she makes a move on the taller brunette - five feet against five five - "Wait!" He pulls her back, makes her turn.

"Why?"

"What did you say earlier?" Before the Earth spun out control this most recent time.

"What? Who cares?" She turns back to her target, who takes a step back.

"'God damn it'?" She's an Episcopalian and a witch but she has her preferences and priorities and "When do you call on God instead of your Goddess?" He turns to Michelle - to the woman in Michelle's body. "And when, 'Sammy', do you taunt anyone?"

"Oops." 'Chelle' says.

"You blew it," the blonde he's restraining says, the anger switched off.

"Well, you did first," the brunette's lips smirk.

"But you did worst. I'm not like that at all."

"WHAT?"

Brunette Michelle comes up to him, kisses his motionless lips. "Surprise, honey, you've been Pranked."

Both women burst out laughing, hugging each other.

For several moments, enduring the high laughter of the naked brunette and clothed blonde, he's not sure what to think but he doesn't like it.

x

"You should have seen your face." 'Chelle - his real wife - tells him, barely able to get the words out.

"When I broke out of the closet," Sammy laughs gayly, "I thought you were going to have a heart attack!"

They're laughing so hard they must hold each other up.

"You mean this was–? There isn't a–?"

"Muto," Michelle laughs. "I thought I'd lose it then! Didn't know you knew Latin."

"I'm a Doctor. But I almost gave out when I said 'Pineapple!"

"Yeah, where's that come from?"

"You mean I–? You–?" He can't think clearly enough to say it.

"Well, we had to get you out of the house," Michelle admits, "but it was supposed to be salt."

"I like Pineapple," Sammy giggles.

"And you were you when I got back?"

"Jimmy," the real Sammy tries hard to say over her mirth "I love you but your married, so I would never do it with you..." the bisexual woman looks Michelle up and down, "but if ever I were tempted to–"

Both women scream when he tackles them and they land together upon the bed. This had never occurred to him before but he'll change their screams and show them 'Pranked'.

Fin.