Epsidoe Five: We will Strike Back!

Autors Note: Okay, so I have never actually SEEN star wards episode 5 but I read the summary on wikipedia so I am pretty sure I know what's going on.

One day Lucas skywalker was chillin on a sexy beach planet with his partner Rad-Ds. Rad-Ds turns to Lucas and said while sippin his lemonade" Hey man we should go to Degobah to train ourselves to be better in the way of the fork."
Lucas turns to him and says "Okay so we can be stronger?"
"yah"
"So Lucas took his lifesaver gun and flew away in Rad-Ds space blimp form off to Degobah.

-

Meanwhile Chewbacco and Hand Soap were at the Rebel base on Planet Popsicle. planet Popsicle was a very cold planet and all the best popsicles in space came from there.
"It sure is cold eher" Hand soap brred.
"Maybe for you," joked Chewbacco. She was very war m in her thick brown fur.
"Next time we go on vacation lets go somerohwere nice and warm!"
"RrrreeeeeeE" said Chewbacco. She was eating a lemonade popsicle. "Slurp slurp slurp"
"That is pretty sexy" blushed Hand soap.
"What did you say Hand Sopa?"
"Nothing." he blushed.
"Okay that is what I thought you said. RrrreeeEEEEEE." And she went back to eating her propsicle.
I'm glad nobody saw that! smiled Hand Soap.
...But somebodry DID see it!
A camera beeped in the corner and sent a message...
but where did the message sent to?

-

Beep beep went teh dark star phone.
"Hello, dis is General Greeble, may I ask who is speeking?"
Beeep beep the camera sais. "I have detected the rebels on {opsicle Planet!"
"Ptroooooo!" General Groovus spat out his tee that he was drinkin. "Rebels on Popsicle? I'd better send out da fleet. Keep manuring their positions!" The camera hung up the phone. "I should gcall Dark vader. ring ring. "Hello, dark vader?"
"Hello? Kshhh"
"Hello, it is your best friend General Bribble. I am calling to tell you wae're going to atack popsicle this afternoon because rebel is there. Do you want to come?"
"Sorry I can't kshhh" said Dark Vader to the phone, "I am on vacation in Cloudville. I will be back necksd sunday. Have fun with those rebels."
"Okay I will bye." click they hung up.

-

Back on Popsicle Hand Soap and Chewwybocca were sleeping together in a tawn tawn.
"Isn't this nice and cozy?" inquried hand Soap.
"Yeah, it's nice being here... with you." blushed Chevybocco. she was really blushed but Hand Soap couldn't see because she was really hairy.
"Crewbacco..." said Soap. "i have sometine to tel you?"
wat is it?" She said blushing even harder.
"I lo-"
BANGLASER!
"Was what that!" whispered Chewbacco?
Ring dong, said the doorbell.
"I wonder who that is" said Hand Soap. "Who is there?"
:Its the mailman." they said.
"Come on in."
"No wait Hand Soap!" cried Chewbacco. But it was too late.
Bam! the door burst open and in came all of teh empire. Storktroopers game in in their Verizon-Verizons (Okay I remember their ships sounded like a telephone companty so this was PROBABLY what they were called) and they came stomping in firing their lasers! Pow pow bang.
"Oh no!"" shouted rebels and they fell down, but most of them were okay because they were still wearing no-die armor. The rebels shot at the Empires but they were ALSO wearing no-die armor too!
"What will wee do!" said Hand Soap.
"Chill out dudes!" inquired a voice form the sky! Out came a ship and it was black and really cool looking so all of the both armies were distacted for a moment because of how aweosme it looked. The cockpit was a big disco ball and it was a jet. Out of the jet jumped Lucas Skywalker.
"Take this!" he offered confidently, firing his lightsaber gun at a Verizin-verionz and they all blew up at ones.
"Thanks for the help, Lucas!" thanke dChewbacco. Suddenly out of the snow popped General Greasy.
"General Greilmerc!" said the rest.
"Not so fast, rebel!" He said. "In name of teh empire we'll beat you ones and or all! Verizon-veriozns attack!" But a tie fighter leaned ober and whistered "Genereal! We don't have nay more soldiers. Lucas Starwalker killed them all!" "dang it! We will be back, rabel scum!" And General Gribble took a popscile and flew away from planet.
"We one." said Obi-one, stroking himself. His beard.
"Let's all go out and party in Cloudville to celebrat," suggested Rad-D jet and they all agreed.
"Yes."
"Yes."
"Yes."
"es."
"YEts."
And then they went."

-

Up and over in cloudevile Dark vader was on the poolside drinkin a hawayan drink from a coconoot.
"I wish I didn't have a helmept on so I could drink this." he said
"Ring ring." It was the camera. "Hello? said dark vather."
"Hello this is bets friend General Grebo."
"Hello Greebo!: " Dark smiled, how are you today? How did the invasion on Popsdtickle go?
bad! actually everyone died.
"WHAT!" said dark vader and spat our his drink that he hadn't actually drunk yet.
"But I did get popsacle from Popsicle." General Greecie smiled.
"Don't smile this is a srs situaton!" Dark exclammed through the telephon!
"How can you tell i'm smiling; I am on the telephone? :( General Gibite asked.
"Because you are right next to me kshhhhh:{" and camera zoomed out and General Grenko was stanking rightn next to Dark vather.
Ha ha they laughed.
"But this is srs omg we have to beat them before they defeat the entire Empiree!" Dark said.
"I heard they were comign to vacation in Cloudvile!"
detn we will get them when they come! I will call in Bobby Fett."
Ring ring "Hello bobby?"
"Who is this."
"It is dark vader can't you tell by my kshhhhhes?"
"oh hello. Would you like to order a pizza"
"No Bobby I need u to kill some people kshhhhh"
"I would like pizza!" said General Gringo.
"Okay kshhhh we will also have one peper rony pizza."
"Okay I will be there on the double bye and bobby hung up.
We don't have to worry anymore, "said Dart water," Bobby Fett is the strongest pizzaman in the universe. He will take care of them. Hahhahahahaha!" They giggled.

-

Here we are on Cloudtown!" Sait chewbacco.
""I have a friend here his name is Black guy (okay what is his name i do not remember but it is MY STORY so that is his name now) we should go visit him.
So they did.
" Black guy" waved Hand Soap
""Hand soap!" said Black guy, putting down the piece of fried chicken he was eating "I have not seen you in forevr! Where is your handsome friend Lucas skywalker who saved the rebels. I want to KILL him."
"What!"
"oh no i meant to say thank him"
Oh ok. Lucas is on Daygoby training with Yoda.
"Ok tell me when he gets back so I can MURDER him."
"What!" aked Chewwbacco? This Black guy seemed pretty suspicious to her.
"I meant to say feed him some of my watermellons. Cloud world is famous for its watermellons."
"Okay!" sad Handsoap.
But Chewwbacoo wasn't so sure...

-

"Yogurt!" called Lucas on Daygoby. Lucas and Rad-Ds flew all the wya to Daygoby out in the far galaxy. It was a swam and it smelled. "Yogurt!" he calleda gain.
" I don't think he's here" beeped Rad-Ds.
But suddently Yoda ca;me out of the bushes.
"In the bushes I was" said Yoda. Yoda was dislexic so everone called him Yogurt because he couldn't tell the difference anyway.
"Hello yogurt, One-Obi king of rebells wants you to train me." said Lucas, "so I can best Jedi ever!"
"Before you become best Jedi ever, learn how to use the forks you mutst," Yoda preached.
"But Yogurt, I already know how to forts!"
"And me too" beeped Rads.
"Okay then let's just have a party and tell eceryone else we trained, we will."
Lucas and Rad-Ds did not understand a single word yogurt said because he is dislexics but by co-incydink they decided to dance anyway.

-

Meanwhile on Cloud town dark Vater walked into the dinning room in his hawayyan t-shirt. "Hello, rebels! Kshhhh" he said.
"Dark Vader, what is he doing here!" asked a surprised Hand Soap.
Calb down, Hand soap," reccomeneded Black guy. Here. Why don't you have some more pizza!"
"But I don't like Pepperonni1!" he sayed.
"It's a trap!" yelled admiral fishman.
ut it was too late. Black Guy swung open the pizza box and trapped Hand Soap inside. He couldn't even move.
"Why. Balck guy why!" Chuewbacco cried?
"Im not really Black Guy he said!" and he took off his face and it was Bobby Fett!"
"Good work bobby, Kshhhhh" said dark vader. "Now we have captured all the most powerful rebel leaders!"
Not ib I have anything to say about it!" A voice arose. And Genderal Girraffe took off HIS face and he was really Black guy all along !
"What! Where id my REAL best friend, Black guy! Dark took out his lightstick.
"I hid him in the cloud over there! Now give back Hand Soap!
"Can't let you do that, Star Fox," said bobby fett, "I have othr deliberies tonight and I have to go." So he grabbed the pizza box and flew away in his jet shoos all the way into space.
"No!" cried Chewbaco! "Hand Soap, I love you!"

But Hand Soap could not hear.

-

DARK VADER's POV

"Best friend! Kshhhh... where are you! Kshhhhh... kshhhh kshhh..."
"Stop walking, you willl need your inhalier!" said a voice!
"General Greevil!" happied Dark Vader. He turned around and there was a pizza box labled "Susag." " Of crouse! Kshhhh... Noone likes susage!" said DArk Vather. General Greevoos must be inside. He goes to open it...
"Not so fast, dark vader!" called a handsome voice. There was Lucas skywalker and Rad-D! They were back from Daygoby!
"You tink u can defeat me! KShhhhh... don't make me laugh. Kshh Kshh kshh." but it was too late. He was laughing anyway."
"Yes we do think that!" Said Lucas. We have a secret now!
Wat is it?
"We learned how to dance wit yogurt!" Rad-Ds boogied. "And now we will defeat you and General Gobbledygook one and for all!"
"Never!" Dark Kshhhhed and he pulled out his red light stick. "General Gristling and I made a promise to be best friends forever! Kshhhh, and that! Kshhhh is what we're gonna do!"
"You can never beat our dance power forces!" said Lucas and Rad-Ds. And they began to breakdanc just like Yoga taught them. Their combined breakdandy force prooved to much for Dark, but just as they were about to defeat him Lucas accidentally sliced open the sausage piza box and General Greenus was freed!
"Let's fight them together, oldp friend?" he asked.
"Ksshhhhh... yes!"
And the two fought the other two and it was very balanced, but Rad-Ds used his radical dancing fork moves and he cut off one of the Geberal's arms while doing a headspin.
"It is okay, I have like six more of those," he said, and then like six more arms came out of him. He looked like a skeleton spider who was also a skeleton with lightsticks.
"Wow, that is prety rad" Rad-2D2 admired.
"Kshhhh... it is a good thing Kuke and Leia are not here or else the rebels would probably win this fight kshhhh" Dark sweated even though he was a robot man so he couldn't sweat.
"Luke and Leia are my brothers!" said Lucas.
"Gasp!" said Dark vader! He was so distracted that Lucas managed to cut off his arm but it was okay because he was a robot.
"I kshhhhh had khsshsdhhs three shkhsssss sonsQ!" he asked.
"Thats right! We were all at the family reunion accept YOU!"
"Oh son kschhhhh I am so kshhhh sorry can you kshhhhh ever kshhhh forgive kshhhh me-"
"Dark!" yepled General Grinbow, "You need your inhaler! We cant stay here any longer!"
"...U are right... Keeeshhhhhhhh... Lucas... Kshhhhh... come find me KSSSSSH and join me KSHHHH and we will rule whole universe KSHHHHHHHHHHH as father and son SSKSHSHSSSS
and Uncle Grebus "
And he flew away.
"...I can't believe my dad is Dark Vather!" said Lucus.
"I know, right?" Rad-Ds beeped radly.
Juts then Chewmoca and Black Man came in from Cloudville.
"We have to find Hand soap becau;se I love him"
"And I am his black best friend" they said respectively.
"Okay Lucas agreed but firts I need a new arm because Dark Vather cut mine up ina breakdance fighgt." So Chewwy cut off some of her fur and Black guy used his voodoo magic and the hair turned into a super arm.

Now let's go save Hand Soap!" exclaimed C-3PO.

The End... for now!

Episode Sixx.: Saving Private handsoap.