How could this have happened?

It had taken quite a while before he was calmed down, and Gojyo wasn't sure if his friend would ever be fine again. It had shocked them all, but there was only one thing left to do and he wasn't sure if they were ready.

Burying their friend seemed all too permanent, that was when they would know that he was not coming back.

Goku wasn't going to wake up ever again.

The red head found himself running back and forth between his two companions, having asked the inn keeper for one extra room so Hakkai would be away from the body. No matter how many times he told the healer, he would always attempt to try and revive him again. It was like Hakkai thought he could do something, but both Gojyo and Sanzo knew their companion wasn't going to come back.

He had been surprised that Sanzo was taking it as calmly as he did, last time he remembered Goku being near death and the priest had nearly lost his damn mind. They needed to bury him, they didn't need to leave his body rotting away in the room for them to look at. He deserved a proper burial and Gojyo cursed silently that they weren't close to home.

Perhaps it was better this way.

Had he been in the room with Goku, could this have been prevented? He wasn't sure how it could have happened, the minute trouble brewed they were usually able to sense it and ward it off. How could someone like the monkey be taken down so easily? Hell, he was the strongest out of them all!

This was royally fucked up on all levels.

Hakuryu stared up at his owner, making a small noise to try and draw his attention away from the window. He knew what he was doing, he was blaming himself for not realizing that Goku was in trouble. The dragon hated when he got into that mindset, it wasn't doing anybody good with him like that and he just wanted him to smile again.

Hakkai only responded with a pat on the head however, much to the dragon's disliking. He could hear movement outside, and that was when Gojyo popped his head in the door. "Hey 'kai," the taller male called out, "we have to bury him soon."

It took him a minute to register what was said to him, Hakkai seemed to stare blankly at his companion. Hakuryuu watched the exchange with anxious eyes as Gojyo repeated his statement, followed by one from the distraught healer-"I could possibly-"

"There's nothing you can do for him, 'Kai." Gojyo said firmly, "I know it's hard to accept, but we can't leave his body there."

Hakkai didn't grace him with an answer.

"You can stay here if you want, Sanzo and I will take care of it."

Again, no answer.

"Hakuryuu, make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."

The small dragon chirped in response, keeping an eye on his master as the door closed again. How the little dragon wished for Goku to magically wake up again, then maybe Hakkai wouldn't look so depressed.

The minute he had heard Hakkai scream, Sanzo honestly had thought that it was the dragon that suffered-not his ward. When they entered the room with their weapons raised he hadn't expected to look into the dead eyes of his charge-the boy who sworn to stay by his side. It hadn't sunk in either by the time Gojyo announced that they should bury the body, but for once the priest had agreed with him on something.

They couldn't leave him there to rot any longer.

Not surprisingly the healer didn't help them, and perhaps it was for the best. It was seemingly shocking that he was as calm as he was, but the blond knew that it hadn't hit him yet. He knew that down the road this would come back and haunt him, despite having tried to put Goku at a distance so he would never feel that pain again.

Had he been in the room with Goku, would he have been able to sense trouble? Hakkai was usually keen on picking up things before they went awry, but he had somehow missed an intruder. Goku should have been able to fight back as well, even though the boy was seemingly a deep sleeper he was always able to bounce out of bed for an attack.

Usually he was the first one out of them to attack full on.

And with help with some villagers, who had somehow been kind enough to grant them a marking on such short notice-they buried their comrade. Sanzo wasn't exactly sure if he was ready to bury him, but he kept his face neutral as his charge was covered. When he was completely buried he walked away, leaving Gojyo to lament by his graveside.

What were they to do now? He knew they had a mission to complete, but he supposed it'd be harder without their fourth member.

It would seem ideal to attack the party now, at such a vunerable state.

Kougaiji however stalled from afar, watching as both Gojyo and Sanzo buried their comrade's body into the ground and then leaving it behind once he was out of view. The whole thing had shocked him all, and he turned to his team to see if they had any answers. "Son Goku is dead," He said, wondering if he was just stating the obvious; "it'd be unfair to attack them now, in such a vunerable state."

"Shouldn't we go ahead and do it? Get the scriptures while we're at it?" Yaone questioned.

"After losing Doku, I don't think it's fair for us to attack his brother in such a state."

Gojyo had been told a month before of his brother's passing, and Kougaiji wasn't sure of his reaction just yet. But he wanted to respect his grieving process-as it seemed the half breed treated Goku in a brother like manner like Doku had with him. He knew they would have to get the scripture sooner or later, but getting it while they were in such a state seemed wrong to him.

"So that's it? We're not going after him? You're such a softie!" Lirin mocked, but Kougaiji did not respond to her; "Big brother?"

"We will meet with them again," Kougaiji said finally, "just not under these circumstances-it would be weak of me to do that to them."

It was a week before they finally moved.

Gojyo had been the one to suggest it to Sanzo, saying that they shouldn't waste anymore time in the village where Goku had been killed. It wasn't good on their mental wellbeing, and it wasn't certainly doing Hakkai any favors. He had offered to drive, with Sanzo in the back and Hakkai filling the passenger seat.

The half-breed had been shocked that the priest had let this happen, as he usually preferred the front himself. Though he figured this was out of respect for Hakkai, though he wouldn't admit it outright. He wondered idly what they were going to do about Goku's killer, should they find him-and who would have rights to kill him?

Would it be Sanzo? That would make the most sense, as they had the strongest bond out of the four of them. Gojyo wanted a piece of them himself, and he was sure that Hakkai felt the same way-deep down at least. He hadn't spoken much since, internally he was probably blaming himself for the younger's death.

It was like the first time he had met him, he half expected his friend to jump out of the jeep and track back to the village just for Goku.

When night rolled around he pulled over, giving rations of food out to the two of them. None of them felt like eating, it appeared they had too much food even. But Gojyo knew they needed their strength, and he was waiting for Sanzo's outburst. 'What am I going to do if they both go crazy?'

The Priest retired first, not saying much himself as he went off to sleep. Hakkai didn't move to sleep, his fingers seemingly caressing the side of the jeep. Gojyo sighed quietly, "'Kai, you gotta stop dwelling on it."

"He was our friend, Gojyo. I can't stop thinking of how I could-"

"What happened, happened. I'm sure wherever the monkey is now, he's not blaming you either."

Hakkai was silent again.

"God dammit, since when did we become this fucked up?"

Authors note: Wow! This is a way late update, but here it is finally...