Chapter 2
I forgot what it was like to feel human. To be human.
To feel pain…
And emotions…
Such things that hinder us from playing God and exceeding all others.
"Shizu-chan…" I whisper meaninglessly as the brute leaves the room.
I feel so degraded, and disgusted in myself. Degraded by Shizuo's dominance. Disgusted by this heinous lust.
Being human sucks.
Every wall I put up around my humanity is shattered.
God has fallen.
Mortality is the only viable option.
My real foe, is mortality. Perhaps I envy Celty and Shizuo? Even Shizuo is far closer to immortality than I'll ever be.
Perhaps that's one of the things that draws me to him?
The world starts faded around me… yes… sleep.
WHEN I WAKE, my head throbs… everything… EVERYTHING aches. I whine in pain, forgetting my sense of pride. I regret it later every time, it signifies the transition to seeming human again. No! Shut it off! Can't I close the feelings off? Can't I stuff my humanity into a box, lock it and throw away the key?
"AAHHHHHH!" I yell out again, wanting to clutch at the sense of the pain but I can't. My body, no matter how much I command it, hurts too much for will power to succeed it.
Then the blonde enters.
"Help!" I gasp desperately, it's odd. My mouth is saying the words, but I didn't think them. I'm not speaking of my own will? I don't understand. Or do I?
Am I going mad?
"Shizuo!" something tugs at me, urging to touch him. His hand is only centimeters from mine but I can barely twitch.
"Yeah I'm trynna help you!" he yells at me, his scold is strangely comforting.
An hour passes, unwillingly tears are still spilling from my eyes, but the pain is slowly subsiding.
"Wow." I scoff, "You must have had a lot of broken bones before…" I mutter with a smirk.
Shizuo's made homemade splints for both my wrists and he's moved me to the floor because it's better support for my back. He placed icepacks on the areas where bruising is prominent, and a cold flannel on my sweating forehead. I catch a glimpse of the colour of the bruises. They are nasty greens and purples, occasionally red.
He has to feed me the drugs, since I can't move. He pops a tablet into my mouth and gruffly commands, "Swallow." and tips water down my throat. It's rough and I almost choke, but I'm admittedly grateful.
"Shizu-chan," I murmur weakly, "Call Shinra."
"Already did. He'll be here in 30." (minutes) Shizuo answered.
"How considerate," I chime, plastering on the same wicked smile as always.
"What's up with you anyway? Are you terminally ill or something?" Shizuo asks me,
Terminally ill? Don't make me laugh! Though when you think about it I guess it isn't so preposterous. But if being hunted by world-class assassins is a form of terminal illness, then yes. Although I have to say I'm flattered that they've deployed such elite forces just for me.
"Somewhat." I answer cheekily.
"Tch. Whatever. You're being strangely submissive, even for being injured…
I'm going for a smoke." Shizuo announced.
"Have fun!~" I sing teasingly, such a poor attempt at mockery from someone such as myself.
When Shizuo calls me 'submissive' it strikes a chord. It makes me hate my current state more than I do already. I want to lock my humanity away again. Block out the all the pain, the emotions, the desires and the little but existent compassion I have! Re-emerge a God again. Once again be the puppeteer holding the strings for only my own amusement. I won't bow down to anybody, and especially not Shizuo.
But I love Shizuo. It's almost like that voice inside my head doesn't belong to me… What is this torment? It's absurd to think I love that monster. But who am I kidding, I'm the biggest monster of them all. Or so I was until I regained fear amongst other things.
Fear is not something that I've harbored for a very, very long time. My only fear had been death, but it had been easy to dismiss since I'd devised methods to evade it. Now there is no evading it, triggering fear- thus releasing a side of myself hidden from the world long ago. How old was I when I started to suppress the characteristics I'm label humanity? 7 was I? Or 8? The days when mother and father were blackmailed to commit a terrorist attack and then double suicide to save myself and my sisters. My mother and father were stupid. They always said, "Don't fight fire with fire!" and "Two wrongs don't make a right you know!" I always knew they were wrong. If you didn't retaliate you allowed yourself to be trampled on, but if you are the one to do the trampling you would certainly end up with blood and guts on the bottom of your shoe. I applied my own philosophy to the situation. I opened father's camera phone and recorded the entire debriefing after they'd done it… at least there was evidence that they had been blackmailed. After their suicide, they weren't going to keep their word obviously, my sisters and I weren't safe from them. Not until I took precautions. I sent copies of that video out to everyone in the phone's contacts, and uploaded it to every social media site I knew. I told that the only way they were avoiding doing time or receiving capital punishment was if I was to verify that it was not them on the recording- the poor quality meant I could twist the story to my leisure. If I was dead, all the evidence would point to them, if I was alive I could hold up my end of the bargain and push the blame onto someone else. Even help them frame my own parents. But I didn't trample on my prey directly. I've always known better, a child's charm was the perfect weapon against my Aunt's lawyer. I manipulated him like a sock puppet. I made sure that lawyer convinced the suspects they were going to walk free hence releasing my sisters from anymore blackmail, then all it took was a witness statement from myself and my sisters telling them who did it. Everyone believes sweet innocent children. In the end, they all fell victim to the manipulation of a cunning 7 ½ year old child. But really, they were just plain stupid. Committing murder was one thing, getting away with it was a whole other.
From then on, something switched within myself and I realized I had the potential to play at God. Religion preached to a higher power they never met, but I… I was very real. I ceased power and made others grovel, everyone in Tokyo was to know the name Izaya Orihara. I am better than any god who makes empty promises in exchange for faith. Though I never gave away any bargains, I always uphold my end of the deal, yet still allow nature to take its course. What better God was there than I?
IT WASN'T LONG before Shinra enters.
He expresses his disbelief about the situation, mostly the fact that I, Izaya Orihara was taking refuge- crippled- in Shizuo Heiwajima's flat.
Whilst he tends to my wounds, I notice Shizu-chan lingering in the shadows of the room from time to time. Shinra continues to ramble about a ground-breaking discovery he could make if he had funding to conduct the appropriate experiments. Something he says about cell stimulation to quicken recovery time and strengthen the immune system.
"Shinra," I interrupt on the brink of my epiphany, "What if I was to be genetically modified using the DNA of a Dullahan?"
Shinra stopped speaking abruptly, quite obviously he knew what this would be implying. Extracting DNA from his beloved Celty and infusing it with me.
"I… cannot see how that is possible." he finally states.
"You're a doctor. You know perfectly well it's possible. You simply don't want to do it because you don't want to share Celty." I point out, "Surely you've thought about it before…" I taunt, "What you are trying to achieve with the experiment which you don't have enough funding for can be achieved by this as well…" There are only two ways to bribe Shinra; with Celty or through his own curiosity. "And if this does succeed, I will agree to fund you fully, and supply you with any human guinea pigs as you require. Just inform me of the criteria." all cards are on the table.
I can almost hear Shinra's brain ticking. Good, he's seriously thinking about this. My eyes scan the room, no Shizuo. Very good.
"Say I was to agree to this. You do understand I cannot guarantee success…. and the number of things that could go wrong are undeterminable." he continues, "These are unbroken waters Izaya-san, you may not awaken the same."
"Hmmmm, tell me Shinra, what is the worst that could happen?" I ask,
"You turn into a vegetable." Shinra answers honestly.
I chuckle. "Shall we schedule a time then?"
"You really are stupidly fearless." says Shinra. Unfortunately, that's not true. "However as I recall, that purely a hypothetical scenario. Give me a good reason why I should agree to your proposition?"
"You do realize if this experiment is a success, you yourself will be able to extend your life with your beloved Celty." I tempt, surely he is aware of this fact already though.
"Yes I do realize. But I don't need another reason for myself to go through with this, I need your personal reason to go through with this." as expected of Shinra.
There's no helping it. "I'll be frank. There is currently a bounty on my head. A bounty so high that it would fund your little experiment 3 times over. So here's the deal, I need this immunity against whichever assassins are hunting me, if the experiment fails and I die or turn into a vegetable- you can cash me in for the bounty yourself and use the money for funding. If it succeeds and I am a happy customer, as well as supplying you with however much funding you need, I will even assist Celty in finding her head. That is the proposition, I suggest you take it for your own benefit."
"I'll consider it." says Shinra.
He's contemplating discussing the matter with Celty. He wants to take me up on the deal.
Even as a human I refuse to be powerless. I am still Izaya Orihara.
That concludes chapter 2!
I apologize that this chapter completely lacks romance and fluff. But I felt this was very necessary for this originally-oneshot's development into a full blown story. I hope I captured Izaya's personality well enough for you all.
Shout outs to those who added this to their favorites- GateBreaker, , Novi-desu, this-feeling-inside, YaoiIsMyDrug.23, and reconnectSlyBlue … thank you all!
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And my amazing reviewers!- Kajune, One of your (my ^.^) fans, this-feeling-inside, anaidreh, Deidara4ever, and reconnectSlyBlue … thanks for encouraging me to continue this story! Please continue your much needed support!
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~Red Queen of Stolen Hearts
