December 2nd
Dear Father Christmas,
I'd never heard of Christmas being celebrated here before this year, but all of a sudden everyone is excited about it, and it is getting a little… manic. In a good way, of course. Except the thing with the Christmas shopping and the gift wrap section, where Matsumoto ended up getting us kicked out… anyway. At first only Yachiru was excited about it, but it is spreading. I think I saw Yumichiki in tinsel earlier today, although I think he'll take any excuse to put on more glitter.
We're all very excited for Christmas here in the Kuchiki household! But if you could just perhaps make the family elders just a little bit less tense, then maybe we'd have a better time. Just leave them some really good sake, or something. A bit of a drink makes anyone more cheerful.
Or a lot more cheerful, if it's Matsumoto and they're handing out free sherry next to the Christmas card section00. But we've left that whole department store thing behind us.
To begin with, I'd like the Chappy figurine collection. And the Chappy stationary kit. And maybe one of those collectors' edition Chappy books, complete with colour illustrations and a whole new set of Chappy limericks.
And, if you can, the Chappy costume. In a men's size large.
Not for any particular reason.
If you could invent some sort of emergency that would get all of my friends from the living world here for Christmas too, that would be great. But I don't expect any miracles on that front, I wouldn't like to try a child away from Isshin Kurosaki on Christmas day either.
But, y'know, if you can do it, could you make Ichigo a little more receptive to wearing said Chappy costume?
Just for research purposes, obviously.
Please, could you send me some inspiration for anything to get my brother that might make him smile, on Christmas? Really, if you don't get me anything else, I'd like that. Just something to make him smile again, the way he does in the photographs from when he was a kid. Something that isn't Renji tied up naked with a bow around him (I know he keeps denying it, but we all know that he wants it really). And if you could make Renji finally surrender to his pent up sexual tension and jump him, that would be cool. The atmosphere in nii-san's department at the moment is driving everyone crazy, apparently.
But I think I've been good enough this year to deserve something, Father Christmas, even if it is just gay sex.
Lots of 3
Rukia Kuchiki X0X0
From outside came the familiar sounds of her brother exploding things in his newly made training area. For the last few months, he had come home from his offices every day and had destroyed something, and although his facial expression never flickered and he remained characteristically silent, Rukia knew that he was letting out frustrations.
She kissed the Chappy envelope and smiled.
Make it work, Father Christmas! I'm counting on you.