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A Grim Life
Harry Potter/Naruto
by Shinji the Good Sharer
Disclaimer: I own nothing in this story. If you think I do then you're out of your mind. This is a free fanfic and will NOT in ANY WAY generate money for my personal use. Flames will be used to burn the hair of Dumbledore's ass.
Chapter 1
Seers and Stupidity
Harry looked at the mange covered dog with an emotionless stare. Unsealing a kunai he flicked it at the dog which yelped and bolted into Knockturn alley when the poisonous metal stuck into the cobblestones at its feet. A single chakra string was enough to pull the kunai back to his hand where it was resealed. Noticing Fleur's disapproving stare Harry frowned slightly. "We don't know if it was rabid or not. I'm not taking chances with you. I couldn't deal with Gabby hounding me if she found out 'the competition' was out of the way either." He muttered.
Giggling, Fleur squeezed Harry's hand and took him to the magical menagerie in Knockturn alley. His killing intent was enough to ward off anyone around them as they walked uninterrupted to the shop Harry owned. The elves and other sentient beings happily greeted Harry and Fleur. Iymithra got hugs from several of her friends and talked animatedly about what life serving Harry was like.
The conditions had drastically increased in the shop. Protective wards had been put in place and the place looked more like a group home than a shop. After getting his owl treats, and just to tease Fleur asking about a book on caring for your 'pet veela' which got him several questions from Fleur on if she should be wearing a collar and calling him 'master', they left with Iymithra following under her invisibility. They were stopped by several reporters including one bitchy one named Rita Skeeter. "What attracted you to Mr. Potter?" she asked.
Fleur forced a blush while Harry used a technique Anko had taught him to lengthen and control his body. The resulting three foot long tongue licking his lips and cracking like a whip made every woman there flush heatedly. "I can do that to every part of my body, draw your own conclusions." Harry commented in his signature monotone. Hooking his arm around Fleur's hips Harry performed a Konoha Shunshin making the three of them vanish in a swirl of wind and leaves.
Reappearing in the alley behind the Leaky Cauldron, Fleur giggled and kissed Harry's cheek before they went inside. Using the floo they went back to Konoha and strolled back to the veela conclave. He kissed her goodnight and made his way back to his estate with his arm around Iymithra. It had been nice to just spend that day with his girlfriend. He had missed her a lot.
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The rest of the month Harry taught Fleur the basics of chakra. Both were surprised when they found out that veela fire was actually chakra based instead of magic. Their aura was a natural version of killing intent as well, but reversed. Instead of broadcasting their desire to kill or their lust for blood it took their natural libido and created a mixture of chakra and magic that worked like an energy pheromone. It was somewhat like a Genjutsu in that it affected the nervous systems of others making them lustful and infatuated.
Since her body naturally used chakra, something Harry suspected every magical creature did to make their wandless magic work; she began picking up the basics quickly. She had mastered tree walking and water walking in the first two weeks. The third and fourth week Harry taught her the academy level jutsus and a few low-level Genjutsu she could practice on her own.
Once she had seen Gai and Lee's 'evil genjutsu' and spent the night crying in his arms. No living being should ever have been exposed to that. Amira had also seen it once and in complete understanding of the horror allowed Fleur to sleep in Harry's bed with him on the condition that Iymithra make sure nothing beyond a few kisses would happen. The next morning Fleur had been feeling much better but she still used accidental magic out of fear every time Lee or Gai was near.
Lee, now having a crush on Fleur, declared Harry his 'eternal rival'. Neji had actually broken down into sobs and hugged Harry, thanking him for taking the title off his hands. Harry had beat his ass for touching him and kicked him in the balls for trying to use the Byakugan to see under Fleur's clothes. Much to Harry's surprise Fleur said not to worry about it since all veela charmed their clothes with runes so no idiots with Omnioculars could peek on them, the same for their walls and baths. It didn't stop the idiots from trying though.
Apparently one 'Jiraiya of the Sennin' had tried to peep on them during the month of training for the finals and gotten his ass beaten for it before they set him on fire. The kunoichi were paying good money to have their hotsprings and homes given those particular anti-pervert wards. Jiraiya had actually complained to the Hokage about the wards ruining his 'research' and made the Hokage laugh himself into soiling his depends.
Now, Harry was sitting in his Hogsmeade office looking over his papers. Taking over a company was easy. It was so easy most of the time that he felt sad he could do it at the age of thirteen without a problem. Simply by buying fifty-one percent of the shares in its stock, Harry could sell the company to himself to pennies on the galleon. Then once he did that he could invest into it on his own not only making his money back but increasing his own income by slowly branching out into other companies. After that he could write everything off as a legitimate business expense to get several million in tax deductions on top of his own profits.
With his monopoly on the trade in Konoha along with his exclusive shipping rights with several other companies Harry had branched off into precious metals and minerals which was always a lucrative trade. He bought broom companies and managed to find a down on its luck law firm for his solicitor to build on. Food, technology, potions ingredients and numerous other companies were bought out and taken over. Soon he began to work on buying machinery and industrial companies. Several logging, drilling and mining companies were amongst them to lower costs of building materials.
It was a simple process. All he had to do was buy fifty-one percent of the stocks over several weeks using his other companies as fronts then he would transfer all the bought stocks into his personal portfolio and slowly amass all he needed. Once that was done he could go to a board meeting, out vote the executives and stock holders into selling the company to him then with his increased control he could easily build up the company with his investments to build more and more companies. Already he was making well over twenty billion galleons a year on his return from Uchiha Enterprises, his flagship company which was slowly taking over other companies.
Dwarves happily took to his mining companies while goblins took to working at his law firm with great relish. The veela got his help in buying out other fashion companies and merged their own enterprises with his. Having him as the head of the company didn't bother them since he took care of their business needs as long as they did their jobs. The Centaurs got jobs harvesting potions ingredients painlessly from various plant and animals bringing even more import and export possibilities. No matter what race or species there was a job perfect for them and they all happily worked for or with Harry thus expanding his company and their own profits with it.
Right now however he was looking through the forms with a frown. He was trying to decide which area to branch into next. Sighing, Harry looked over the forms. There was a huge potions manufacturer in Romania that supposedly even had access to a dragon and basilisk preserve. On the other hand there was an international security company that hired out soldiers, mercenaries and bounty hunters all over the world which would be the perfect front company for Konoha to use while branching out. "Ssapdril, what is the going rate for stocks on these two companies right now?" Harry asked showing her the two companies.
Ssapdril opened her computer and looked through several world stocks. "It's twenty galleons a share for the potions company and you would need to get at least ten thousand shares for the take over. The mercenary company is five galleons a share and you would only need to get two thousand shares to take it over. However the potions company stock is rising faster."
Harry nodded and sighed. He would have to get the potions supplier first then go for the mercenary company once he was done with that. Signing the papers he folded the letter before stamping it with the Uchiha fan insignia in red wax and handing the letter to Hedwig who flew of with a squawk. "Ssapdril, please remind me to get Hedwig some companions to help her. I think she may by getting tired from all the letters she's delivering."
The high elf jotted down the note before she noticed the time. "You and Iymithra will need to hurry if you are going to meet the Hogwarts express when it enters the Hogsmeade station." She suggested. Harry thanked her and stole a kiss before he and Iymithra hopped out the window into the trees. Ssapdril just smiled and shook her head as she filed through several more quarterly reports from the dwarves.
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By the time the train was nearing the Hogsmeade station, Harry was sitting on a bench with an invisible Iymithra while talking to Hagrid. "Are yeh sure yeh're gonna to be okay?" the huge man asked making Harry raise an eyebrow.
"That's the third time you've asked me that, Hagrid. Okay about what?" he questioned with a raised eyebrow.
Hagrid winced before pulling out a wanted poster with a wizarding photo of a man holding a sign which said Sirius Black. "'ere's Sirius Black. You should probably talk to Dumbledore, he would know abou' it. They say he's the one 'o turned Lily and James in to You-know-who."
For several seconds Harry looked at the poster before vanishing in a swirl of black smoke with Iymithra. Hagrid noted that Harry had absolutely no change in his emotionless facade when he vanished.
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At dinner, Harry had noticed several Aurors lurking around under invisibility cloaks including one Mad-eye Moody, that purple haired girl he was always with and several others who had been at the train stations. "Welcome students, new and old. Before we begin our feast, I would like to inform you that we have beefed up security with the apparent release of Sirius Black… yes Harry?" the headmaster asked when Harry raised his hand.
"Who is Sirius Black and why does everyone seem to be so afraid of him?" Harry asked with his calm and emotionless tone.
Dumbledore and everyone in the room winced as they shifted in their seats. "Harry, would you prefer to have this conversation somewhere more private?" When Harry's gaze hardened and a substantial amount of killing intent rolled off him the old man sighed in resignation. "Sirius Black was a friend of your father's. Our new DADA professor Remus Lupin would know more about it than I, however he betrayed your parents to Voldemort letting them get killed. He then hunted down his friend Peter Pettigrew and killed him as well by casting a blasting curse that killed twenty muggles. All they found of poor Peter was his finger."
Raising an eyebrow Harry looked at the headmaster. "That's all?" he asked with some slight annoyance leaking into his voice. "He throws a reductor curse that any fourth year can cast and killed a group of people with no magic and suddenly he's feared? Pathetic." Harry said back in his emotionless tone.
Quite amused, Dumbledore looked at Harry. "I realize that he's not Voldemort but…" he didn't get to finish as Harry pulled a black book and opened it.
"This…" he said loudly enough for everyone to hear though he did not change his tone in the slightest. "…is a Bingo Book. It lists the most powerful and dangerous criminals or potential threats alive today as well as the bounties on their heads. I got this from a rival village so I might be in here. Please bear with me." He said before turning to the first page trying not to remember how he had picked it off a dead Ame-nin while helping with the clean up of the village.
Name: Mitarashi, Orochimaru
Age: 50
Date of Birth: October 27, 1943 AD
Blood type: O positive
Hair: Black
Eyes: Yellow with slit pupils
Rank: S-ranked [criminal]
Bounty: 50,000,000 [dead or alive]
Notes: Orochimaru is wanted for the kidnapping and experimentation of 100,000 children from his own village including his own daughter Mitarashi Anko. His experiments were done in the hopes of him being able to create the perfect body so he could rip the soul out of the child and place his own soul within it in the hopes of gaining immortality. Those he considered failed experiments were enslaved through a cursed seal which allowed him to twist and torment their minds into obeying him. His own daughter was one such failed experiment.
Orochimaru is extremely dangerous as he is known as one of the three legends. His skills in assassination and experimentation are top notch and he is capable of an unknown number of forbidden techniques. In addition he is in possession of the legendary sword, Kusanagi no Tsurugi which is said to be able to cut through anything and poison anyone it cuts. It is recommended that one approach with extreme caution.
He read off ignoring the horrified looks of those around him. Even the children of Death Eaters looked horrified and Dumbledore looked a bit ill. Harry just turned the page and began reading the next entry.
Name: Uchiha, Itachi
Age: 17
Date of Birth: June 9, 1976 AD
Blood type: AB positive
Hair: Black
Eyes: Black
Rank: S-ranked [criminal]
Bounty: 45,000,000 [dead or alive]
Notes: Uchiha Itachi was forced to become an s-ranked criminal at the age of thirteen when he committed what is known as the 'Uchiha Massacre'. In the course of one night he slaughtered all 41,000 other members of his own clan even going so far as to strangle several newborns with their own umbilical chords. This was done with such precision and skill that his own village was unaware of his attack until his own little brother, tortured and barely clinging to sanity, wandered into the village streets where he was found by one of the village leader's personal guard and taken to the hospital.
It was later testified by Uchiha Sasuke, Itachi's younger brother; that Itachi had admitted to doing it simply to find out if he could. The criminal then forced his younger brother to watch his entire family and even his own parents being slaughtered by Itachi. The only Uchiha known to have not been attacked by Itachi that night was Uchiha-Potter, Harry. It is believed Itachi either did not know about him or was too afraid of to attack. Anyone who sees this particular man is counseled to use extreme caution.
Taking a sip of his butterbeer, Harry turned the page with his thumb while idly noting that he really did look like Itachi's twin as Anko said on several occasions. He stopped when the new DADA professor spoke up. "Wait, you're related to him Harry? How is that possible?"
"The Uchiha clan was one of the most prominent and powerful clans in existence. It has been said that only an Uchiha can defeat and Uchiha in battle. As for how that's possible I'm afraid it is my business not yours." Harry said emotionlessly before going back to his reading.
Name: Hoshigaki, Kisame
Age: 29
Date of Birth: November 10, 1964 AD
Blood type: B positive
Rank: S-ranked [criminal]
Hair: Black
Eyes: White with black pupils.
Bounty: 40,000,000 [dead or alive]
Notes: Kisame is known in many circles as the 'Daimyo Killer' for his daring and surprisingly successful assassinations of six separate Daimyo during his career. Once one of the 'seven legendary swordsmen of the mist' Kisame is known as one of the greatest swordsmen on earth. His sword, Samehada, is capable of absorbing any attack making most forms of conventional attack useless against him.
Quite skilled in water elemental attacks, he is known in particular for his style of creating tidal waves to wash his opponents away while using the odd design of his sword's blade to defend against attacks and shave chunks of skin from his opponents until they bleed to death or drown. This may be from his clan bloodline which makes him look like a shark and even gives him the ability to breathe under water. It is suggested that anyone who sees this criminal exercise extreme caution.
By now, everyone but Harry had gone pale at these descriptions. Each and every one of these men went beyond what Voldemort did. They were walking one man armies! Even Snape was more pale than normal as he listened. Dumbledore looked at Harry far more calmly than he felt. "Harry, you said you might be in there. Might I ask what for?"
"Word travels fast in my profession. Not having up to date information can get you killed so large scale networks are set up to keep groups informed." He told them while turning the page.
Dumbledore frowned and looked at Harry. "May we hear your entry if it is in there?" he asked with a grandfatherly tone.
Harry just started flipping through the book. It was fairly recent being last month's issue and the Bingo Book was updated twice a month in addition to a daily news letter on the internet. He frowned when he saw his entry and noticed how like Itachi he really looked when he flipped back and forth between the pages. 'Do I really look like that?' he thought before mentally shrugging as he started to read. He idly noticed that it was published before his promotion.
Name: Uchiha-Potter, Harry
Age: Unknown but suspected to be nearly 200,000
Date of Birth: July 31, Year unknown suspected to be around 198,000 B.C.
Blood type: Unknown
Hair: Black
Eyes: Black
Rank: U-rank
Bounty: N/A
Notes: Once known as Senju Tamura, Harry has been recently dubbed 'the immortal assassin' in many circles due to his trait of immortality. His ability to reduce his own age even to that of an infant only to 'grow back up' is well known since it was discovered and is suspected to fake his death every hundred years or so, alter his appearance and age into maturity with his fanatical servants or spies posing as his parents. Nobody is sure of his abilities or skills but he is suspected in the mysterious massacres of several villages and nations over the eons.
The newly established 'goblin clan' have admitted to him taking part in no less than three 'goblin rebellions' by assassinating the lead goblin general at the time. Confirmed in a consensual mental probe of his memories to be ancient, he is better known as the creator of all hereditary bloodlines and retains the knowledge and ability to bestow these rare and often extreme powers upon others at will.
As a U-rank a 'flee on sight' order had been issued upon his appearance on the battle field and any mission which goes up against him is considered a failure immediately. Anyone seeing this person is recommended to retreat immediately and wait for further orders. Under no circumstances is he to be engaged in combat. Anyone who disregards this order is considered dead until proven otherwise.
Harry finished with a raised eyebrow. Unknown to anyone in the room including him all of this information with the exception of his looks and bloodline were false, a ruse that was worked up by a mixture of chance, propaganda and rumor. To Harry's false memories however, the information was surprisingly accurate.
Jaws dropped as Harry looked at the next page before turning back to his profile with a raised eyebrow. Everyone gaped at him as the boy took bite of his dinner while looking through his information again. Harry had purposely left out the information on his and Itachi's bloodline as well as replacing words like Missing-nin for criminal as he read off the information.
He was almost done eating when Dumbledore spoke up. "What do these… ranks mean Harry? Is there some system to it?" he asked.
Nodding, Harry didn't take his eyes off the book as he paused with is bottle of butterbeer casually resting on his bottom lip. "Moody, if you don't drop the wand you have pointed at me under that invisibility cloak I'm going to stab you in your good eye with it. The same goes for the rest of you idiots. Those cloaks are useless against me." he said before taking a sip of his drink and going back to the book.
It was more of an educated guess than being able to see them since his Sharingan wasn't activated. He could hear the sound of their cloaks shifting though and they had all jerked when he got to his age. Trying to defuse the situation, Dumbledore cleared his throat and forced a kind smile. "You were going to explain the ranking system."
A sigh came from Harry as he put the Bingo book away in the pouch on his back right hip before taking another sip of his butterbeer. Finally Harry spoke. "The ranking system is actually very simple to understand. E-ranks are the lowest and typically consist of civilians and academy students. Most wizards and witches fall into this category. D-rank is reserved for trainees and higher level wizards such as yourself, Alastor Moody and Voldemort himself. C-rank generally has to do with average combatants and foot soldiers with no particular skill or ability. B-rank is for specialists who excel in one specific area or have a special ability which allows them an advantage over others."
"So… a Metamorphmagus or Animagus would be one such person?" Dumbledore asked with an interested tone.
With a shake of his head Harry looked at the old man. "Anyone can use those abilities if they train properly. They happen to be basic academy skills in fact." With an unseen handseal and a sudden flash of smoke everyone was treated to the sight of a second Dumbledore. "As you can see it's a very simple to use ability." The replica said before returning to normal in a puff of smoke as he sat calmly. "However the method to learning how to use it is a trade secret. Those who you call Metamorphmagus in the wizarding world usually just have the ability due to a natural affinity for it. It's one of the first abilities taught in the academy."
One of the cloaks had shifted when he had transformed, most likely a Metamorphmagus who worked for the ministry. It moved towards him suddenly like it was trying to run at him only to be stopped by another cloaked figure and held back. "A-rank is reserved for those who are considered elite and excel in all or most aspects. They are considered the best of the best and often have a bloodline or skill that gives them a huge advantage over others. S-rank is for, quite simply, the freakishly powerful. Those who hold this rank are considered extreme dangers to most villages and nations let alone groups of people, going against one is usually considered a form of suicide due to their legendary rank. They are often given 'nicknames' based off their most well known traits or skills. U-ranks are all but unheard of no matter where you go. They're considered monsters at best due to their ability to take on multiple S-ranks easily, because of this any time they enter battle an immediate retreat order is put into effect and anyone who enters a fight with one is considered dead until proven otherwise."
Snape chose to bolt up from his seat angrily. "I refuse to believe this! There's no way that…" Snape's rant was cut off when a wave of pure bloodlust and evil struck the entire great hall coming from Harry who was calmly eating his dinner in a perfectly dignified and careless manner.
"I will remind you that I've killed the Dork Lard Gigglesnort not once but three times, each in a single move and under ten seconds. I also put you all down and disarmed you in my first year easily, Dumbledore and Gigglesnort included. Do think about your next words." He suggested to the now quivering Snape before letting up on his killing intent. "At any rate, you can see that Voldemort and his incompetents haven't even warranted a mention in the Bingo Book. Sirius Black will be no threat." Nobody but Harry and Iymithra felt like eating for the rest of the night.
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The next day, Harry sighed as he sat back in his chair. It was divination class, one of his electives. Feeling bored, Harry used Tōmegane no Jutsu to look through the crystal ball letting it wander around aimlessly. He stopped when he found something interesting and raised an eyebrow while forcing down his blush. There in the crystal ball was a sleeping and obviously quite nude Professor Aurora Sinistra. "Hmm… interesting."
Everyone in the room looked at him since he was sitting at a table by himself. Professor Sybil Trelawney stopped her talking about the 'inner eye' and looked at the young school celebrity. "I'm glad you think so Mr. Potter, I…"
"Not that." Harry said in his monotone. "This." He told her, gesturing to the crystal ball he was using. A blinking Trelawney walked over, stumbling twice, to get a good look at what he was talking about. She gaped as she saw a perfectly clear image of her fellow professor waking up and starting to 'do things' to herself.
Choking on air she looked at Harry. "How did you do that?!" she shrieked angrily. "It's not possible to get such a clear picture of the future!"
"Future?" Harry asked with an annoyed tone. "That's what she's doing right now. What is she doing though? I've seen my friends and my girlfriend do that from time to time. Whenever I ask what it was they just blush and sputter for a while then tell me not to check in on them when they're doing that." With his monotone nobody was sure if he was mocking her or serious.
Trelawney flushed a bright red when she looked back at the crystal ball before putting a handkerchief over it. "That's not for young boys Mr. Potter. Now, please explain how you got your crystal ball to scry and view someone in her bedroom on the other side of the castle."
Harry shrugged. "I can't, sorry. Like all my abilities it's a trade secret. Only members of my village are allowed to learn the abilities. Anyone else is in violation of the trade secret protection act and subject to immediate incarceration in our prison." He told her calmly causing the woman to go red in the face and sputter.
Looking at Harry's tea leaves the teacher gasped. "The Grim, my dear, the Grim! The giant, spectral dog that haunts churchyards! My dear boy, it is an omen -- the worst omen -- of death! You're going to die my dear! Oh what a tragedy!"
As the students whispered Harry looked at Trelawney with a flat stare. "Out of curiosity, how many times were you dropped on your head as a child?" The students gasped at Harry while Trelawney gaped like a fish. "Immortality means one will never die. Do you ever think these predictions of your through? Do they just spew out your mouth or do you have to pull them out your arse?" he asked with an annoyed stare. "More than likely I'll just have to kill another person this year. No different than my life since I was born." Trelawney was suspiciously quite after that.
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Lunch brought Daphne and the other Slytherins to Harry. He sat in his typical seat eating the soup and sandwiches Nippy had snuck in for him. Draco looked depressed about something and not even Harry using chakra strings to make a whole chicken beat the tar out of Weasley got a chuckle out of him. "What's wrong with you Draco? You've been moping around since the end of last year." Tracy asked.
"My dad died. He fell out of a high window and died at the end of last year." He muttered causing Harry to roll his eyes at how the little cry-baby was milking it. Anyone who had any concept of another person could see that he was faking it to try and get girls to feel sorry for him. His glances at Pansy Parkinson's breasts were enough to show that.
All the Slytherins started giving Draco their sympathies. Draco, however, noticed Harry ignoring him. That was the exact opposite of what he wanted. "What's your problem Potter, too good to give your sympathies to a housemate who lost a father?"
"Too intelligent to not notice how you were staring at Parkinson's jubblies out of the corner of your eye while you said it. You're faking the whole crying act in the hope of getting girls to feel sorry for you." Harry said in a monotone that caused several girls to gape and scoot away from Draco, much to the blonde boy's ire. "Besides, I was aware of the fact he died at any rate and sent your mother a 'forget-me-not' black diamond teardrop necklace as a condolence gift."
Bolting up from his seat Draco fumed angrily. "That was you?!" he shouted angrily. His face had turned a deep purple that would have made Vernon Dursley proud. Several other Slytherins tried to sit him down or stop him but the irate boy shrugged them off. "She hasn't taken that necklace off since she got it! Stay away from my mum Potter! I've seen how she looks at it and smiles!"
Not seeming perturbed in the slightest Harry simply took another bite of his sandwich before wiping his lips with a napkin. "I have never met your mother Malfoy. I was also unaware that she liked my gift so. What your mother does with my gift is no concern of mine. It is hers to do what she likes with." He turned to his soup calmly still having not opened his eyes.
"…it was you." A stunned Draco said in a weak voice. His anger came back in force when Harry paused in his next bite of the sandwich. "You were the one who killed my father, weren't you Potter?!" He said and tried to go for his wand only to have several seventh years restrain him. "I'll bet you were responsible for all those muggles killing Crabbe and Goyle's fathers too!"
By now, Harry was sitting with his hands laced before his face watching Draco. He didn't confirm or deny Draco's accusations. Staring at the boy calmly, Harry watched him struggle and rant for several minutes until he calmed down. "Are you quite finished?" The Sharingan user asked with a perfectly calm tone. Malfoy looked like he was close to blowing a blood vessel but didn't say a word. "Good, then finish your food son. We have Care of Magical Creatures next and if I tell your mum you were slacking off on my watch I'll be sleeping on the couch all summer." He quipped in his monotone.
Draco's face went red in anger. It was shortly followed by purple, then blue as he worked himself into a frothing and foaming rage. His sputtering as the others in the great hall laughed at him suddenly stopped when his eyes rolled up in his head and he fainted. The humiliation and anger were apparently just too much for him and his mind had shut down to block it out. 'A job well done if I do say so myself.' Harry thought.
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Harry followed the others with a grace in his steps that caught several people's attention as he walked. Draco seemed to have calmed down slightly after his nap but he still glared at Harry whenever he was in view. Hagrid would be teaching this class for the first time and he had asked them to gather at the stables and paddock.
When they arrived they saw Hagrid feeding a creature that seemed to be half griffin and half horse. Several recognized it as a hippogriff. "'is 'ere's a Hippogriff. 'is name is Buckbeak an' today I'll be teachin' yeh 'ow ta get along wit' 'im."
In some circles Hagrid was famous for his butchering of the English Language even amongst British wizards but he was in rare form today apparently. Harry and several other students had to suppress winces at how Hagrid mutilated words and put them back together like a taxidermy project. 'It's Frankenglish!' Harry thought with a mental chuckle.
"Firs' thing yeh gotta know is that yeh gotta be very polite wit a hippogriff. It's very easy ta insult a hippogriff but try not ta, it migh' be the las' thing yeh do." The half-giant said with a serious tone. "Why don' yeh take the firs' try Harry?"
The creature squawked as Harry calmly walked half-way over and unsealed a box of pocky from his supply scroll. He put the scroll away and starting to munch on one of the thin stick-like cookies. Harry watched the creature looking at him confused. Hesitantly the large creature sniffed at him as he pulled out his second stick and ate it. "Harry, you need to approach him and bow." Hagrid suggested.
He was ignored as Harry munched on the second cookie. Buckbeak was rather curious about what this strange human was eating and cautiously came closer to him. Harry ignored the large bird-horse and Hagrid's fierce whispers to bow as he calmly munched on the chocolate covered cookies. Buckbeak was less then three feet from Harry when the boy pulled out another stick of pocky and held it out with is free hand dismissively while eating his own stick.
Sniffing the stick for several seconds Buckbeak nipped it with his beak. He then took the stick and stood next to Harry eating it calmly. There was silence as everyone watched Harry eat the pocky with the hippogriff for several minutes before the bird-horse nuzzled his chest and let Harry scratch behind his plumage. "Food is the one language every species on earth has in common." Harry said calmly.
"What a bunch of tripe. If you can do it Potter, then anyone can!" Draco hissed and strolled up towards the hippogriff arrogantly. Buckbeak screeched and reared up, swiping with his claws and it was only Harry's speed that knocked him out of the way. Harry fell to the ground with his eyes unblinking and several large gashes across his back.
Nobody moved or spoke as they looked at the lifeless eyes of Harry Potter. Suddenly his 'corpse' twitched then started to spasm before it's back arched and snapped with a loud crack. It shifted into mud before slowly melting into a puddle of wet and moist dirt. "Close call, eh Malfoy?" a voice said from above them. They looked up to see Harry standing on the high branch of a tree picking at the dirt under his nails with a kunai as he sat with his legs crossed and his back against the trunk.
Gaping at Harry, the students looked from him to the pile of dirt and back. Daphne and most of the girls had hearts in their eyes as they stared at Harry. "How did you do that, Harry?" Hermione Granger asked.
"U-rank, remember?" Harry asked with an emotionless stare. "If you want a layman's term for it 'I'm just that bloody good' should suffice." He said. Hermione looked annoyed while Ron and Draco looked absolutely infuriated. "Hagrid, for our next lesson what say we try something a little smaller to start out with?"
Scratching the back of his head sheepishly, Hagrid nodded. Harry's head suddenly jerked up and he looked off to the side with a frown. Something had twanged his wards at the shrieking shack. They hadn't been triggered but something had definitely twanged them for a moment. The clone vanished in a puff of smoke leaving a group of confused students and one surprised half-giant staring at where he had been.
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In the Shrieking Shack, Harry frowned and moved to the closet where the tunnel to the Whomping Willow began. He hopped down with Iymithra following close behind as they darted down the corridor quickly. There, they found a surprised Remus Lupin sniffing at the wards curiously. "Might I ask what you are doing trying to get into my house?"
"Harry? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in Hagrid's class?" he asked making Harry frown. "And what do you mean 'your house'? You should be living with your relatives like Dumbledore said. The Shrieking Shack doesn't have an owner anyways."
Not amused in the slightest Harry drew his chakra fang and channeled lightning chakra into it making sparks of blue electricity arch off it. "I bought the property for my own use. You will answer my question… now."
Wincing, the older man sighed. "I'm a werewolf Harry. I was just going to get the Shrieking Shack ready for the next full moon." He said looking downcast.
Harry calmly pulled out his fifth scroll; his potions scroll, and began looking through it for several minutes before unsealing a vial and tossing it to the man. "That enzyme will stop the change for sixteen hours. Have Pomfrey inject you with it at sunset and you will not change. If you tell anyone about me or my house… you will never get another dose." He told the professor before walking back up the tunnel.
"Wait! Harry, how did you get this?" Remus asked with a worried tone.
Without looking back, Harry spoke. "Marcus and William make them. I gave them the information on how to make it." He kept walking not sparing the werewolf a second glance as he walked. "Go back to the school. You have a full moon to get ready for next Friday night and I have more important things to deal with than your questions."
Remus looked at the vial then to the vanishing back of Harry before sighing and walking back the way he came sadly. 'Maybe trusting Dumbledore on where to put him was a mistake on my part.' He thought with a sigh.
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On Monday, Harry received two letters at the Shrieking Shack. The first was from Fleur making him smile as it arrived with a large colorful bird. It had a soft almost haunting voice that was relaxing and its plumage had all the colors he could imagine and more. This bird was called a bird of paradise, Fleur had seen it in a magazine and made Gabrielle give him puppy-dog eyes until he got one for each of them.
:: Dear Harry.
Shut up! I know it's stupid that I can write English better than I can speak it!
Now that you're properly chastised, I have finished learning and mastering those Genjutsu you gave me. I need some new jutsu to learn if you have any suggestions. I was hoping you had some scrolls on medical jutsu and possibly some Kenjutsu.
Your loving and devoted veela love slave,
Fleur Isabelle Uchiha-Potter ne Delacour ::
Chuckling he wrote a reply back telling Fleur that she had access to his library at his house anytime she liked. His portable library held the originals and the only copies of all the texts above Jounin level. It also had everything on bloodlines, summoning or Kinjutsu. He trusted Fleur just fine but it was a precaution incase someone unwanted found a way into his house around the wards. Besides, sometimes Naruto was too smart for his own good. He also told Fleur that she could call Nippy to get any scrolls she wanted from the house library.
Once he had sent that letter off he looked at the other one which was held by a cockatoo for some reason. Picking up the letter he looked at the sender. It was Narcissa Malfoy ne Black according to the postage. "…bugger."
End Chapter 1
Translations:
Hokage – Fire Shadow
Sennin – Legendary Ninja
Jutsu – Technique
ANBU – Black Ops
Jōunin – Elite Ninja
Chūunin – Average or Journeyman Ninja
Genin – Trainee Ninja
Shinobi – Male Ninja
Kunoichi – Female Ninja
Genjutsu – Illusion Skill
Ninjutsu – Ninja Skill
Taijutsu – Body Skill
Kenjutsu – Sword Skill
Kinjutsu – Forbidden Skill
Henge – Transformation
Tōmegane no Jutsu – Telescope Technique
Author's Notes:
There's chapter 1. To anyone who doesn't get the 'Frankenglish' joke, think of it was words put together in patchwork style like Frankenstein. It's a play on the 'Japanglish' joke about when some American who can't speak Japanese or Chinese tried to use English words to sound like he's speaking them. If you ever feel like a laugh pay attention to these people, it NEVAH get's old! Uh oh! What does Narcissa want? Find out in the next chapter!
