After placing more children of both genders inside the boat I came across a boy who looked older than fourteen who was with his mother. We had been informed not to allow any boys over fourteen into the boats until the rest of the women and children had been allowed into the boats.
The mother looked so tired and frail I didn't have the heart to turn them away.
I lost track of the faces of the people I helped into the boats. Faces I had never seen before and may never see again.
It was eerie. I expected panic, screams, hell, I had even imagined being shoved overboard in a mass hysteria.
Instead it was mostly quiet. I could hear the sounds of voices and people weeping.
I hated having to separate fathers from their families. I didn't want to see the tears flowing down the faces of the women and children. I wanted to look away and yet I couldn't.
I didn't want to die.
I wanted to live!
I wanted to return home, marry, and start a family.
And yet my work wasn't done. I didn't know if it would ever be done.
Oh Lord, if I survive this night I promise... My silent prayer was interrupted by a girl running up to me.
"Can I get into that boat?" She asked me.
Slowly I managed a smile. "Sure!" I quipped and hoisted her into the boat.
A young stewardess had been instructed to get into my boat in hopes the non-English speaking passengers would follow her example.
I turned around and suddenly found something being pressed against my chest. Looking down I saw something wrapped in a blanket. At first I thought it was someone's lost possessions and was prepared to toss it overboard for sunken treasure when I heard a noise.
I heard an infant's cry.
My head swiveled from side to side wondering just where that infant was squalling from when I realized the noise was coming from the being in my arms!
I had a baby!
My God! I almost threw her overboard!
How do you hold one of these? I thought.
Holding the squalling infant close to my chest with one arm I peeled back the blanket to see an unhappy infant's face.
My eyes glanced down the clothes to see it was clad in blue.
I held a little girl in my arms. Someone's forgotten baby.
I turned back to the lifeboat and was relieved to see they had not departed.
"Take care of this won't you?" I asked the stewardess as I passed the infant to her.
She took it and gave me the same look I most likely had on my face when I discovered the little one.