Disclaimer: I hate these things but they're necessary I guess – Don't own any of the characters, no infringement intended.
Rated M for adult content, Jack/James/Ianto (oooh, what a combination…)
Jack and Owen brought Bond up to their boardroom where Ianto had taken the coffee. Owen had strapped his injured shoulder up and given him painkillers and he looked somewhat better, even if still a little rough around the edges. Ianto dutifully served their guest, then the rest of them. He watched for the response and was rewarded as Bond's eyebrows rose a little on tasting it, then he thanked Ianto appreciatively.
"So, you'll stay the night?" Jack said "You'll surely not be picked up before morning now?"
"Day or night, I can be picked up whenever I ask for it"
"Well, it's roughing it a little" he shrugged "but you can sleep on the couch downstairs or, if you prefer, Ianto has a spare room at his flat if you'd like something more comfortable"
"Of course" Ianto said with a smile "You'd be very welcome" Owen rolled his eyes and Gwen and Tosh smothered smiles. Jack glared at them and they departed to "go do more research on the object". Owen excused himself to check the test results and left Ianto and Jack to tend to their visitor.
"So this is Torchwood." Bond said, glancing round "I often wondered what it would be like."
"Not as glamorous as MI6." Jack suggested.
"Actually it reminds me more of Q's domain, our R & D department. Computers everywhere and more gadgets than you can throw a stick at"
"Well, our gadgets are mostly alien and I wouldn't throw a stick at any of 'em." Jack grinned "You might get more than you bargained for."
Bond laughed "After today, I can appreciate that" he paused "So, you are Captain Jack Harkness" he said, leaning back on his chair and scrutinising the Captain closely while Jack looked curious "The reports have you wrong" he said, the beginnings of a teasing smile on his face "You're much better looking than they indicate."
"Hands off" Ianto surprised himself.
Bond looked at him with those oh-so-piercing eyes again and smiled "Have I got competition?" the smile, a very seductive smile, widened.
"That depends" Jack said, unable to resist flirting "on what you intend? Ianto is my partner as well as being on my team"
Bond regarded them both for a moment, his expression giving nothing away, then changed the subject and said "You said I could phone HQ?"
"Through here" Jack said, leading the way. He gave him the phone and then retreated with a smirk on his face "Did you hear that?"
"As I said, hands off!"
"Ianto, he could snap your neck as fast as look at you" Jack teased "You like living dangerously?".
"And I might just set Myfanwy on him!"
"Hmm, nasty. Are you jealous?" Jack grinned "You are, you're jealous!"
"Not unless you get him and I don't." Ianto retorted "You do know who he is, I presume?"
Jack looked at him with a head-on-one-side quizzical look and Ianto rolled his eyes "That's the James Bond, 007, one of their best agents" he hissed "Maybe the best. My God, you really don't read anything apart from porn, do you?"
"Hey, it's well-written porn!"
"I mean, you don't bother finding out about anybody other than us, do you? You know, MI5, MI6, special ops, SAS, SBS, whoever. You just don't bother."
"We're Torchwood, we're…"
"I know…outside the government, beyond the police, etc., etc." Ianto muttered "But that doesn't mean we're safe. There are other departments that would probably love to see the back of us. We're a loose canon, we're not controllable and they hate that"
Presently, they could hear a rather heated conversation coming from the office.
"Doesn't sound too good." Ianto said "Getting a right ticking off by the sound of it. I can identify with him there."
"Hey, I don't tell you off very often, not since you started blackmailing me by threatening to stop my coffee, or serving me de-caff!"
"And it would be deserved. I work bloody hard for you lot. By the way, thank you for asking me to share my flat with a man whose hands are probably lethal weapons."
"You should be right at home then." Jack replied with a mischievous grin "And I was going to stay too. I wouldn't leave you alone with him…"
"Worried I'll damage your tea boy?" Bond was standing at the door.
"He's jealous, that's all" Ianto said seriously.
Bond laughed again "The infamous Captain Jack? I doubt it" he picked up his mug and saw it was empty. Ianto sighed and took it from him "I'll get us a refill" he said and reluctantly left them together "…and I am not just the bloody Tea Boy!" they heard him mutter as he left.
"I take it he's the wife in the relationship then?" Bond said but Jack shook his head.
"No, he's Ianto" Jack said "there's more to him than meets the eye"
"Been together long?" Bond asked.
"You're very nosy for a spy" Jack grinned again, showing teeth.
"Comes with the territory" Bond replied "But things have changed in the 21st century"
"That's my line" Jack said "The 21st century is when everything changes…"
"Well, as our website states "its more about combating terrorism, the proliferation of weapons of mass destruction and narcotics, they're the major challenges of the 21st century. The Secret Intelligence Service assists the Government to meet these challenges" or so they would like you to believe"
"I had heard they're now as 'secret' as we are. Maybe we should have a website too, 'Welcome to Torchwood, if its alien, its ours!'"
"You should have heard M's opinion of the website"
"Ianto was trying out the on-line interactive tests to become an operative."
"What did he score?"
"10 out of 10"
Bond smiled "We might be able to use him then"
"I don't think you'd want him" Jack said "I believe he called the tests sloppy and inaccurate and not a very good advert for spying"
Bond laughed "I think he'd get on famously with Q," he fixed Jack with a look from those pale eyes again "and you're not at all like the reports would have us believe. I think I need to amend them when I get back to base"
"And what will you say?"
Bond paused and a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. Jack was having fantasies about kissing that mouth.
"He's a charming bastard with more than his fair share of luck who obviously enjoys a special…no, close relationship with his staff…" It was Jack's turn to laugh just as Ianto returned with the coffee "What?" he asked in his long-suffering way "What did I miss?"
"Nothing. Mr Bond here seems to think I have a close relationship with my staff, is all"
"Commander" Ianto corrected.
"Pardon me?"
"I think you'll find the correct mode of address is 'Commander Bond' not 'Mr'. At least, to go by a comparison of service ranks, you'll be relieved to know you outrank him, Group Captain Harkness" Ianto was enjoying the look of consternation on Jack's face. "He's also been decorated. I believe the correct title is Commander James Bond, CMG, RNVR Sir?"
"It is" Bond acknowledged, his expression amused.
"Companion of the Most Distinguished Order of Saint Michael and Saint George, Royal Naval Volunteer Reserve" Ianto elaborated "Would have been Knight Commander but I believe you turned it down because, and I quote, "I did not want to become a public figure". Am I correct?"
"You are." he leaned over to pick up his coffee cup, suddenly close to Ianto's ear and his breath ghosted over Ianto's neck as he whispered "You realise I might have to kill you. That information is classified, on a need to know basis…"
Ianto's eyes fluttered closed "Do I get a last request?" he murmured. The soft laugh in his ear sent shivers down his spine. Ianto wasn't entirely sure he was joking.
"Well, well." Jack chuckled "Might just make you salute me."
An answering chuckle greeted the suggestion and Bond shook his head "I gave up saluting. I gave somebody an order while I was undercover once and the bastard tried to remove my head from my shoulders with his bayonet"
"Good move"
"What was, my not saluting or him trying to remove my head?"
"Both probably"
Ianto sat still, looking between the two men, the blond and the dark, blue eyes regarding each other. It disturbed him to think of them both as killers. Yet they were, each in his own way. They both made on-the-spot decisions, often regardless of consequences, as long as it got the job done and the desired result. He shivered and put the thought away. In a way the danger seduced him, enticed him, drew him in. He wouldn't be working for Torchwood unless a part of him actually relished the work. Part of him, he thought, though not all, not all by any means.
A knock on the door heralded Owen with a look on his face that was less than encouraging.
"If I was your MO, I would not be passing you for active duty" he said bluntly.
He spent the next ten minutes illustrating the results of the scans. The alien scanners were more advanced, calibrated to return results that would be impossible on normal ones.
"The good news is that the muscle and tendon damage isn't irreversible. The torn tendons in your shoulder will heal with time and so will your back. However…" Owen traced a finger along Bond's arm "…I might be taking my life in my hands here, but I suspect you have a recurring that, so far, you've been covering well but I think it might be starting to cause you a problem. You've managed to keep it hidden up to now but you've exacerbated it with this latest crap" Bond nodded, reluctantly "Its not your gun hand, but it might hamper you in a fight or a climb" Owen frowned "It might right itself, but it can take a long time. Corrective surgery might be an option but not necessarily successful" he fixed Bond with an apologetic look and added "You need a desk job for a while, take things easy"
"Hardly my style" he replied dryly but he thanked Owen for his concern.
The half-healed damage to Bond's back and the exacerbated damage to his shoulder drove him to seek a better place to sleep than a sofa. He chose comfort and opted to stay at Ianto's flat. He went with Jack to retrieve his overnight bag from the boot of the DBS, Jack having arranged for the car to be towed to their secure car park beneath the Welsh Assembly building. It wasn't as much of a write-off as he had first thought it might be but Bond was still convinced Q would probably murder him. He would definitely have a fit if he didn't get the car back at all. Jack insisted on carrying his bag to Ianto's car and stowing it in the back.
In truth Bond was hurting after the crash, which wasn't actually a crash, he had to admit. It had, however, managed to wrench his shoulder against the restraints, slam his back against the seat and given him one hell of a headache but he had been hurt worse and survived. With sleep and painkillers, he would be fine in a few days. He could relax a while now the rest of Montoya's gang had been 'cleaned up' and he had to admit, the two men from Torchwood intrigued him.
Torchwood intrigued him. He knew of it of course, they all did. It remained a shadowy sub-level, under crown funding and protection, its specific nature kept under wraps. However, they were the UFO folks, the Mulders and Scullys, the ones who rode rough shod over everybody else's investigations. They were supposed to be above the Government, beyond the police. UNIT didn't even have any control over them. M's opinion of Torchwood would make a soldier blush. If push came to shove she wouldn't take any interference from the likes of Captain Jack Harkness. Thinking about the possibilities of that confrontation made him smile. He had already heard her rant about her meeting with Yvonne Hartman, the previous boss of Torchwood London. Jack Harkness was no pushover.
Ianto's flat was a pleasant surprise - neat, tidy, comfortable, unadorned. Bar for the obvious accoutrements of kitchen (with a proper coffee machine) the lounge with its computer and expensive entertainment centre he would have said it resembled a hotel. The man was not one for clutter, that was certain.
Jack threw Bond's bag on the spare room bed and Ianto said "I'll show you the bathroom" he gave him a couple of towels "bath or shower?"
"Either would be a bit difficult" he indicated his arm in its sling.
"You want help?" Jack asked.
The look Bond shot him was unreadable "Knowing you, I'd be taking my life in my hands"
"If you want help, just say so" Jack said mildly, throwing his coat onto a chair. Ianto immediately retrieved it and hung it up, then went to the kitchen to make coffee.
Bond retreated to the bedroom, gingerly taking his arm out of the sling and unzipping his bag. He found his dressing gown, shorts and washbag and laid them on the bed. He pulled off his tie and unbuttoned his shirt, eased the cotton off his injured shoulder and hissed as the movement pulled the abused tissues. Owen had strapped it up but the bandage was awkward and would make showering difficult. He sighed. He could at least get a wash. He sat on the bed and unbuckled his belt, dropped his trousers to the floor, then kicked them out of the way, then threw his dressing gown over his shoulders. He felt old and weary.
Jack gazed at the bedroom door with narrowed eyes.
"If he wants help, he'll ask" Ianto said, pouring coffee.
"He's a stubborn bastard..."
"Not like you then."
Jack glared at him, then began to chuckle "OK, OK, I get it. But when someone needs help, why don't they just ask?"
"You're asking me? Mr 'I-can-manage' Harkness? Here, drink your coffee and leave the man alone. I'm going to see if I have any of those prescription strength painkillers Owen gave me last month"
"You OK?"
"For him, Stupid"
"Ah" Jack took his coffee into their bedroom and stripped, pulling his sweat pants on for comfort. When he came back out, Ianto had started cooking.
"Its just pasta" he said "nothing complicated"
"It'll still be wonderful" Jack said gently, slipping an arm round his lover's waist for a hug.
"Flattery will get you everywhere"
When Bond emerged, it was plain that the effects of the crash were catching up with him. He looked grey, his face a mask. Jack was across the room and at his side in an instant.
"Will you see sense and let me help?" he said, placing a hand beneath Bond's good elbow "Its plain you're not going to manage the bathroom by yourself"
"Fine" he snapped. It came out harsher than he wanted but at that point he didn't care. He allowed Jack to walk him down the hall to the bathroom, allowed him to start the shower. When Jack reached to take the dressing gown off he felt the man stiffen.
"look, I'm not going to jump you, give me some credit!" Jack snapped "I just want to help" he felt the man relax and laid a hand on the good shoulder "Not that I wouldn't like to" he added "but I think you might collapse"
Bond laughed softly "Sorry. You're probably right"
Jack smiled, sat him down and carefully removed the bandage, then guided him under the spray. He stood under the jets for a long time, just soaking up the heat, letting it play on the tight muscles of his shoulder and back. Jack wielded the soap as best he could, trying to ignore the smooth back and toned muscles under his hands. Once done, he helped him out and dried him off, guiding him out of the bathroom and onto the couch in front of the fire. Jack made a passable attempt at strapping his shoulder up again, then towelled his hair gently dry.
By then, Ianto was already demolishing a generous plate of bolognaise. Bond looked at his listlessly. He wasn't very hungry. "I'm sorry, I'm just not…" he looked at Ianto who smiled in sympathy and handed him a glass of water and two pills
"Owen gives us these if we're in need of something more powerful than the over-the-counter stuff. They should take the edge off" he said.
Bond took them wordlessly and almost threw then down his throat. He finished the water thirstily. "Bed" Ianto said "When they kick in, you'll not be able to stand. Come on" The smart comment died on Bond's lips, there was something about Ianto that was innocent and sincere and he found he couldn't just throw the man's obvious compassion back in his face. He reminded Bond sharply of Villiers. He allowed Ianto to lead him through to the bedroom, whereupon the younger man shepherded Bond into bed and pulled the duvet up. He put the side light out and left the door ajar with a whispered "We're next door if you need anything James" the use of his first name was oddly comforting.
Sleep did not come easily, despite the tablets. He was restless and feverish, drifting in and out of nightmares. Lights blinded him, burned his eyes to dust, eyes haunted him, staring blue eyes, harsh and unforgiving, his own… He didn't realise he was moaning, whimpering and thrashing about until a pair of hard arms wrapped around him and held him down. He struggled, still fogged with the drugs and sleep, too weak to fight back.
"Stay calm!" the gentle voice ordered. Breathing hard, he opened his eyes and looked up into blue ones, darker than his own and wary "You were dreaming" he didn't reply, just tried to force himself to calm down, drawing deeper slower breaths into his lungs. He allowed himself to lean his head against warm skin, firm muscle, a supporting shoulder.
He felt a hand on his brow, heard a different voice "He's burning."
"Call Owen."
"OK." a weight leaving the bed.
"Take it easy, you'll be OK" the gentle voice in his ear, breath warm against his neck. The arms continued their grip, firm and reassuring.
"I'm fine" he mumbled.
"Sure you are" the voice was American, Felix? He frowned, couldn't be…then who? The miasma of nightmare was still confusing his thoughts.
Owen grumbled about being wakened so early but stopped when Ianto told him the problem. "I'll be over in 10 minutes" was all he said and hung up. He was there in five, examined the patient thoroughly and found nothing to be worried about.
"He's running a temperature but its not too high, only 100°. Can't find anything else wrong. I've given him some broad spectrum antibiotics just in case. Keep him in bed and I'll call round tomorrow"
"Sorry Owen" Ianto said as the doctor packed his bag and he shrugged, philosophically.
" My job" he grinned "but you lot keep forgetting I gave up house calls a while ago"
"Take the morning off, sleep in. I'm sure Jack won't mind. We'll see you after lunch"
"Yeah, unless the bloody rift activates" he sketched a wave in the air and walked off to his car. Ianto shut the door and turned "How is he?" he asked Jack who stood by the bedroom door.
"Spooked" he said.
Ianto groaned "Should have seen that one coming" he remarked dryly and added "So what now?" Jack sighed and they both went into the bedroom. Bond was sitting up, propped on the pillows. He looked less than his best. He regarded the two men who stood in the doorway watching him. "I'm feverish, not dying!" he said, grumpily.
"You want to sleep with us?" the words were out of Ianto's mouth before he realised it and he missed Jack's faint look of surprise. Bond regarded them both. The recollection of Jack's arms around him felt surprisingly good. He hadn't missed the man's expression though, even if Ianto had. His eyes fixed on Jack's and the look he gave him was questioning. Jack nodded almost imperceptibly and Bond gave them a weak smile of acceptance.
Without a word, Jack stepped close and flipped the covers off, brought Bond's good arm across his shoulders and helped him up. They escorted him through into their room, the rumpled, king-size bed easily big enough for the three of them. Bond found himself between them both, cradled carefully against Jack's chest, Ianto a warm presence behind him, a hand kneading his uninjured shoulder gently. With Jack's heartbeat in his ear, he fell asleep with ease this time.
Bright sunlight shafting through the curtains woke him. Ianto was gone but Jack was still there, holding him, breath warm against his neck. Bond cracked a lazy smile and asked "What time is it?"
"6am. How are you feeling?"
He took a moment to consider "All things considered, not too bad" then he moved and groaned as his shoulder pulled and all his other aches and pains kicked in at that moment. "Spoke too soon" he grunted.
"Coffee?" Ianto said from the doorway, bearing a tray.
"Lifesaver" Jack answered.
Bond struggled to sit, leaned back against the pillows, groaning softly. He was a mass of aches and pains, he realised he was deathly tired and he felt like he'd gone six rounds with a gorilla, a large unforgiving silverback probably. He accepted the coffee Ianto presented him with and sipped "Ah, that's better" humanity was returning, albeit slowly.
Ianto grinned and got back between the covers.
"I know what you need" Jack said.
"What would that be?" the ice blue eyes regarded him warily.
"One of Ianto's massages, more painkillers and sleep"
"You're welcome to stay as long as you need" Ianto said "what did the boss say, when do they want you back?"
"Technically, I'm still on sick-leave but she wasn't pleased when I told her where I was. She's never been the same since she talked to Yvonne Hartman. I believe she called her an arrogant, egotistical, overbearing, heartless bitch, or something like that"
"That's about right" Jack said "She was never my favourite person either. You can reassure your boss that I'm nothing like her…" he paused, reflectively "In some ways I may even be worse…"
Bond smiled "You're nothing like her" there was meaning behind those simple words that had little to do with refuting any likeness to the previous boss of Torchwood 1.
"If you don't mind me asking" Ianto wasn't sure if he was on dangerous territory but kept going "isn't James Bond supposed to be a bit of a lady's man?"
"He is" James grinned at him "It's a useful reputation" he said "but I hate labels"
Ianto laughed "You're as bad as him" he snickered "if it has a pulse…"
"Now, now" Jack said "If it has a pulse and is attractive…"
"Play nicely children" Bond said mildly.
Hmm, the boys are on the way to getting up close and personal…they're off and running again. Having read a couple of Bond stories I have tried to remain true to the spirit of the character, especially his rank and title. Please review…