When Kate got to her house she felt cold and alone. She had puffy red eyes from crying about Castle. She didn't know why she was all upset. She had Josh she had an amazing boyfriend who was always saving people. She needed to stop thinking about Castle and focus on Josh. JOSH, she told herself over and over again. Not Castle!
She grabbed a ton of blankets and headed to her room, she put on the warmest clothes she had consisting of 3 shirts, 1 hoodie, yoga pants, sweatpants and a bunch of socks. She wrapped herself up in the millions of blankets she had collected and closed her eyes.
She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep, she just couldn't understand what happened to Castle. She knew she had something to do with it though, she couldn't help but think all the pain he had was all her fault.
She heard a slight tap on the door as she looked up and seen Josh in the door way.
"Hey Katie," there was that name again.
"Hi."
"Are you ever going to tell me what happened at the precinct?"
"I just really don't want to talk about it, okay?" she looked at him with hurt in her eyes, she knew that if he seen the pain the topic would bring he wouldn't bring it up.
"Okay," he said worried.
"Can you just come keep me warm please?" she started to shiver a little as she thought of the freezer. She had almost died a few times today and all she wanted was to just rest and be warm.
"Sure thing Katie," Ugh he needed to stop calling her Katie, every time she heard it she wanted to break down and cry.
He got into bed and snuggled up to her making sure he held on to her tight enough to keep her warm.
She closed her eyes and hadn't noticed she had fell into a sound sleep.
XXXXXXXXXXX
She woke up in tears screaming, "CASTLE! CASTLE! STAY WITH ME! DON'T GO PLEASE I NEED YOU! STAY WITH ME!" she opened her eyes as she heard Josh calling her name.
"Katie? Katie! Wake up Kate!" he had a worried look in his eyes and stared at her for a while rubbing her back to make sure she was okay.
"Where am I?" she said, as she looked around frantically.
"Shh shh shh," he spoke to her as if she was a little baby, she hated that.
"Where is Castle!" she said panicking, "I need Castle!"
The tears began to pour down her face, she had a nightmare. Castle was dead, he died holding her. He died trying to warm her up in the freezer. She warned him that he was going to get even colder but he wouldn't listen. He never listened.
"Hey I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere" Josh whispered to her while he still stroked her back.
"Okay, thanks" she replied wishing that it was Castle that was telling her that.
"Now go back to sleep" he told her as he held her tight and shut his eyes.
She had no choice so she just closed her eyes and wished for the best.
XXXXXXXXXXXX
Josh woke up a few minutes later when he felt Kate turn to her side. He ran his fingers through her hair and kissed her softly on the head.
"Hmm Castle" she said in a mumble still asleep.
Josh moved back and stared at her for a second. He knew she wasn't in this relationship, he felt like she always was half in and half out. He knew though that Castle had all of her and he was jealous.
Why did she feel the need to tell Castle all this stuff, but couldn't tell her own boyfriend?
He looked at the clock and it read 4:30AM. He knew things would never work out with Kate and he wasn't going to stick around to watch it all unfold.
It was time to go, he thought.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Kate awoke to the sound of footsteps walking around her apartment.
What the hell? She thought as she looked at the clock. What was he doing?
She staggered to her feet and got the warmest blanket she could find as she wrapped it around her shoulders and walked carefully out of the bedroom.
She saw Josh looking all around the house grabbing everything that belonged to him.
"What are you doing?" she said with a curious tone to her voice.
"I'm leaving, I can't do this anymore" she cringed at the sound of those words as she heard them just hours before as she watched Castle leave.
"What are you talking about? Come back to bed," she didn't know what to make of this, was he really going to leave her too?
"He loves you too, you know" were the only words that came out of his mouth as he kept on gathering his things.
"Wait! What! Josh. Who are you talking about, who loves me too?" she was shocked, she had a pretty good idea of who he was talking about but she couldn't wrap her mind around what he just said.
"Castle." She knew he would say that, but she didn't believe him. Not after what Castle said to her yesterday. She was still wondering what that all was about.
"Josh, come on you can't be serious…wait did you just say he loves me TOO?" she said astonished at the accusation. "Are you seriously accusing me of loving someone else?"
"You said his name when I kissed you on the forehead Katie, you said his name, did you think I wouldn't care? My girlfriend who I stayed here for just said another guy's name while I kissed her! You don't think I might have a reason to be a little upset?"
Her face got red, she was so embarrassed. Why did she say Castle's name? She was supposed to be focusing on Josh. She was supposed to be in love with Josh.